“I love you, Wilhelm.”
They sat together for a few minutes in silence.
“Anna, will you do something for me?”
“Anything.”
“I want to try and induce a dream when we go back downstairs. Will you allow that?”
“Why?” Her stomach churned at the idea of her dreams.
“I just...need to. Will you trust me?”
After a pause, Anna nodded. “I trust you.”
Chapter Forty-One
Down in the Elders’ Chambers, Anna sat on her heels with Gavin behind her, his body pressed against hers, his arms around her waist. She looked up, scared, at Wilhelm.
“Gavin will be able to guide you, Anna. Listen for his voice and do as he says. We will be able to hear you when you speak.”
Anna trembled and nodded.
“Close your eyes,” Gavin said softly.
Anna obeyed and she felt his hand on her forehead. Slowly the sensation faded and she knew nothing.
It was the same room she always saw. She looked around for Alex but he was nowhere to be seen.
“Do you see him, Anna?” Gavin asked in her head.
“No, he’s not here.”
“Tell me what you see.”
She described the room in detail, from the bed to the bookshelves.
“Is there a window?”
“Yes.”
“Look outside and tell me what you see.”
She described the mountains and what she could see of the house and the yard.
“Have you even been outside this room?”
“No. He’s always been here.”
“Go out into the hallway.”
Anna walked to the door and looked at it. She reached for the doorknob, but her hand went right through it. “I can’t open the door.”
“You do not need to. Walk through it.”
Anna stared at the door and put her hand to it. To her surprise, it went right through like the doorknob. She squeezed her eyes and walked forward. She felt a brush against her skin and opened her eyes to see herself in a large, rectangular room with a wooden staircase in the middle of it going down. Several doors lined the area and it was lit by wall sconces and a ceiling light. Gavin asked what she saw and she told him.
“Go down the stairs.”
She did as she was told and made her way slowly down the wooden steps. Her feet made no sound as she wound her way around and around, down several flights. There were no more doors, only open, empty rooms below. When she came to the stone floor she saw two wooden doors, one on either side of the room.
She told Gavin what she saw.
There was a pause. “Go through the west door.”
Anna looked around. West door? But something told her that the door right in front of her was the proper door and she walked to it, squeezed her eyes shut and walked through. There was resistance and she groaned as she pushed through, but at last she was free and opened her eyes to look around.
She stood in a long, very wide hallway with thick blue carpeting on the floor. The walls were made from rich wooden paneling and chandeliers hung from the ceiling at intermittent distances. Tall doors lined both sides of the hallway.
“What do you see?”
Anna spoke of what she saw as she moved forward. At last she came to what looked like an entryway, where the carpeting ended in a large, round room with a marble floor and a huge wooden door with beautiful decorative ironwork along the back of it. A marble staircase circled the room and led to the upper floor. Windows and glass doors along the back of the wall let in the afternoon sun, and she could see a large, grassy yard outside.
“Keep going.”
She walked across the entryway and then jumped when the door to her right opened. Vlad stood there looking at her, or at least she thought he was looking at her. She froze and stared.
He looked troubled as he looked at her. “Why are you here?” he asked softly.
“I....” She swallowed nervously. “Wilhelm...he wanted....”
“Wilhelm? He knows you dream?” Vlad looked around. “You cannot be here. Devin will...Devin is here. You must leave.”
“Devin?” she said softly.
She heard a voice calling in the room behind Vlad.
“Please Anna, go!” he whispered urgently. He reached out and touched her shoulder and the image faded.
Anna collapsed forward onto the floor. What had just happened? Why hadn’t she seen Alex? Where was he? Why did she dream of Vlad?
“Anna?” She felt a gentle hand on the back of her head. She looked up to see Wilhelm crouching next to her. “Anna, what did you see?”
“Vlad...Vlad was there and he said that Devin was there and that I had to go. He looked upset.”
Wilhelm frowned. “I spoke with Devin yesterday. He is in San Francisco, awaiting your return.” His shoulders slumped and he ran his hand through his hair. “I am sorry, Anna. You did well. Thank you.” He helped her to her feet. “Let me take you back to your room and I will have someone take you to the Gutshaus.”
“You’re not coming?”
“Nein, I need to speak with the other Elders for a while.”
*****
Wilhelm didn’t return for dinner that night. As far as Anna knew he wasn’t home before she and Kurt went to bed either. He had returned sometime that night, because he was at breakfast the next morning. His face was very pale and he looked as if he hadn’t slept. Ilsa kept looking at him with a worried expression on her face.
He was like that for the next few days. He stayed in his study and his eyes were red as if he’d been crying, though Anna had a hard time imagining Wilhelm crying.
The night before they were to fly her home, she knocked on his study door. He responded in a sharp voice, but in German. She opened the door slowly and poked her head in.
He growled and threw something at the door that shattered. She gave a little cry, closed the door quickly and ran down the hallway to the back staircase that led to the library. She sat on the bottom step and stared at the ground. Wilhelm upset like that frightened her. She’d never seen him lose his composure, and he had been upset for four days now. What had happened?
A few minutes later she heard footsteps behind her and someone sat behind her.
“I am sorry, Anna. That was you at the door, ja?”
Wilhelm. “Yes, Wilhelm. I’m sorry I disturbed you.” She stood and turned around. His face was etched in grief, his eyes were bloodshot. She’d never imagined he could look so miserable. “Wilhelm, what’s wrong? Did I do something to upset you?”
“Nein, Liebling. I did it to myself.” He sighed. “Anna...your dreams....” He looked up at her with tremendously sad eyes. “Your dreams had given me hope that Alex might still be alive somewhere.”
Anna’s jaw dropped at his words and her heart lightened. “Oh, Wilhelm!” she said, hope bubbling to the surface. “I hated to dream, but they kept coming and I couldn’t stop them....” She spoke quickly, but stopped when he held up his hand and shook his head.
“It was a false hope, Liebling.”
Anna’s heart stung at the look on his face.
“I am sorry, Anna. I had hoped that maybe...maybe he was still alive and that you were able to keep in communication with him.” He paused. “That is why I took you to the Schloss. To find out if it was true.” He shook his head sadly. “I was wrong. So wrong, Anna.” His face contorted into deep grief. “I had held onto the hope for so long, and now....” Tears began rolling down his cheeks and his great shoulders shook as he began to sob. “I was wrong, Anna. He is gone.” He buried his face in his hands. “He is gone.”
The grief consumed him and Anna wrapped her arms around him as he sobbed. Anna wanted so desperately to help him...to heal him of his hurts. She had finally come to some semblance of acceptance of Alex’s death. The hope that had kept Wilhelm going had been ripped away and his heart was raw once again.
She felt something inside her start to grow warm. She could heal h
is heart.
“Wilhelm,” she said softly next to his ear. “Wilhelm, come with me.” She took his hand and led him upstairs and into the room she had stayed in the night before her wedding. She closed the door and led him to the bed. “Sit,” she said softly.
He sat and she began to unbutton her sweater. He stared blankly at her hands as they moved swiftly down her torso and then pulled the sweater off her shoulders and let it fall to the ground. His eyes moved to her swollen breasts and he gazed at them like a hungry man.
“I will heal you, Wilhelm,” she whispered, reaching behind her and unfastening her bra, letting it fall to the ground as well. “I will take away your pain.” She quickly removed her jeans and panties and then moved forward to capture his lips with hers. He kissed her desperately, running his hands over her body. Anna continued to whisper to him, telling him everything would be all right. She felt the warmth inside her radiate out and spread to him.
She slowly undressed him and he groaned softly as she lay down and pulled him on top of her. She kissed him again, trailing her hands down his back to his buttocks and caressed them, then moved around and stroked his hardening cock slowly. When he was fully erect, she guided him into her body and the warmth spread from her body to his. He moaned as he began to move inside her.
“Oh, Wilhelm!” she cried softly as he filled her over and over again. He wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly as he thrust harder and harder into her. Deeper and deeper he went until they both exploded into a hot fireball, the heat consuming their flesh and melting their separate souls into one. Her heart reached out to touch his, the searing heat healing the wounds gently and making him whole again. They were one body, one soul. Everything she was, she gave to him.
*****
Anna awoke later, shivering in the cool room. Wilhelm was sound asleep next to her. The sun had set and the room was lit by bright moonlight that snuck in through the open curtains.
She turned on her side and ran her fingers through his hair, now more white than gold. He had aged these last years. She could see it in his face. But the grief that had consumed him earlier was gone and he slept peacefully. She hated to wake him.
She should tell Ilsa where he was. Ilsa had been so worried about him the last few days. And Kurt would be wondering where she was.
Anna slipped out of bed and dressed quietly. She saw a blanket on a chair near the window, and she covered him as best as she could. He was a large man and it was a small blanket. She kissed his cheek and then slipped out of the room silently and went in search of Ilsa.
In the dimly lit sitting room where Ilsa normally spent her evenings, the clock over the mantle said it was after midnight. Ilsa was nowhere to be seen. She glanced at the double doors that led to their chambers and hesitated. What would Ilsa think? He was lying naked in a guest room. They couldn’t hide what they’d done. Anna had just wanted to help.
Anna took a deep breath and walked to the bedroom doors and knocked. A few minutes later, a sleepy Ilsa answered the door.
“Anna? Is everything all right?”
Anna bit her lip and nodded. “Wilhelm is....” She flushed and looked at the ground. “He was in so much pain....” She looked back up at the woman she thought of as a mother. “I wanted to help. To heal him.” She spoke, ashamed at what she had to tell her.
Ilsa looked at her for a long moment without speaking.
“I’m sorry, Ilsa. I never wanted to violate your home.”
“I know he loves you, Anna,” she said softly. “He has never denied that.” She sighed. “Did he tell you what was troubling him? I have been so worried. He has not acted this way in so long.”
Anna nodded and told her what Wilhelm had told her. “He was hurting so badly and I knew I could help him.”
“Did you help him?” Ilsa’s question was gentle.
“I think so. He’s sleeping peacefully.”
“That is more than he has done in several days. Where is he?”
“In the room I was in before Alex and I married.”
Ilsa nodded slowly. “Thank you for telling me, Anna. You should go to Kurt. He was worried about you.”
*****
Anna made her way upstairs to Kurt’s room. She went in as quietly as she could and saw the light by the bed was still on.
“Anna!” Kurt jumped out of bed and walked quickly to her. He hugged her. “Where have you been?”
“With your father. He...was very upset.”
Kurt’s face fell. “You helped him feel better?” he asked in a low voice.
She looked up at him. “He is my Master, Kurt. It is my duty to aid him where I can.”
“You fucked him?” He backed away a step.
“I healed him,” Anna said softly.
“By fucking him.”
Anna hated how crudely he put it. “Yes.”
Kurt looked at her for a long moment. “I love you, Anna. More than any other woman I have ever known.” He shook his head. “But I cannot deal with you fucking my father. It....” He sighed. “Gretchen wanted him.”
“I love your father. I love you. He is my Master. I can’t not be with him. It’s part of my duties.”
“Duties,” he snarled and Anna jumped. “Mein Gott, Alex, why did you have to die!” It was a wailing question shouted into the night air. He fell to his knees. “I cannot do this, Anna. I am not my brother.” His eyes were wild and sad at the same time. “I am not meant to be an Elder. I am meant to be the irresponsible little brother who drives his family crazy with his antics.”
Anna’s heart went out to him. She felt the same way sometimes. “I understand, Kurt,” she said softly, walking slowly to him and kneeling next to him. She lifted her hand to his rough cheek. “I’m not meant to be an Elder-Mistress. But I am, and it’s terrible.” She smiled gently at him. “Wilhelm is so proud of you,” she said earnestly. “You have done so well. Don’t give up.”
“He is proud of me?” His voice was strained.
“Yes. I see it in his eyes when he looks at you. And he’s told me so. You have made him so happy.”
Kurt pressed his lips together and shook his head. “I want to make Vati proud. I want to do right. But it is so against my nature.” He stroked her cheek. “I do not want to share you with anyone,” he whispered. “It breaks my heart thinking of you with other men. Even men who love you.”
“I’m sorry, Kurt. I don’t want to hurt you. I love you.” The warmth began to grow inside her again and she looked at him. She could help him too. Take away his ache. Make him strong. Make him...let her go. The thought pained her, but it would help him. She could never stop being what she was. But she could make it so he could find a good wife to make him happy. And let her go. She leaned up to kiss him.
“Let me heal your pain,” she whispered hypnotically. “Come.” She stood and led him to bed and healed him as she had healed his father.
Chapter Forty-Two
She flew back home with only Wilhelm. Kurt had decided to stay home. Anna could see in his eyes that he had let her go, and now he would be able to find a suitable wife. One he didn’t have to share.
Anna stared out the window and ached for Kurt. But this was for the best. He deserved to be happy. Genuinely happy. He was a kind, strong man and would make any woman proud to be his wife. It just wouldn’t be her. It couldn’t be her.
Wilhelm came and sat behind her on the couch and nuzzled her neck. His grief was gone and he was once again the strong, confident man she knew. Ilsa had thanked her before she left.
“We will be landing soon,” he said softly, running his hand down her thigh. They had made love many times on the jet. She would miss his gentle touch. He kissed her neck and she closed her eyes and sighed. “I will miss you.”
“I’ll miss you too, Wilhelm,” she said softly, leaning back against him.
*****
It was Tuesday afternoon in San Francisco when they landed. Wilhelm would take her to Devin tomorrow and maybe stay a few
more days, depending on what Devin had planned. They would spend today getting settled back into the house. Anna was at peace with living there now, content with the memories of Alex in her heart. He would have wanted her to be there.
Her phone rang Devin’s ring as they were driving into the city from the airport. Wilhelm frowned but nodded when Anna told him who was calling.
“Hello, Devin.”
“Hello, Baby. I see you’re back in town.”
Anna frowned. “How did you...?”
“Anna, I know where you are at all times. Did you enjoy your time with Wilhelm and his family?”
“Yes. I did.”
“Good. I hope you’ve gotten them out of your system for a while. Where are you heading now?”
“To the house. Alex’s...er, my house. I didn’t know what had happened to the apartment and thought I might like to stay at the house for a while.”
“‘You thought you would like?’” Devin repeated coldly. “Oh, Anna. You have grown far too independent for your own good. Stay where you’d like tonight, but as of tomorrow, you are living with me at my house.”
Anna gasped. “At your house?”
“Yes, Anna. I don't think I get the full benefit of our relationship when you live on your own. The kids are all grown now, Sandy is...gone and I have an empty house to come home to every night. I don't like it. You will live with me. I expect to see you at my house tomorrow before lunch.”
“Yes, Devin,” she said softly and he hung up. She looked up at Wilhelm. “Devin wants me to live with him.”
“With him? What about his wife?”
“He said she’s gone.”
“Gone?”
Anna shrugged. “She’s been having...issues since she lost a baby a few years ago.” Anna didn’t mention that it was Devin who took the baby. “She’s been unwell. Maybe she finally left him.”
Wilhelm frowned. “That is not good. Elders are supposed to be above reproach and respectable.”
The Life of Anna, Part 4: Ensnared Page 25