And she wanted more. Maggie shamelessly pressed his head against her breast, and when his hands slid up under her breast, she welcomed them, yearning for his touch.
She ran her hands through his hair, loving the feel of his mouth on her breast, his hand on her thigh, slipping inside her panties. She did gasp then as his fingers found her hot spot, as he caressed, first slow, then fast, until she felt herself losing control.
"Don't stop," she whispered.
And he didn't, not for several mind-blowing minutes of pleasure that left her shaky and breathless. He lifted his head and smiled at her. She felt a little embarrassed that it had all been for her.
"I had a good time, too," he said with a smile, reading her mind.
"Not as good as me." She suddenly sat up, hooking her bra, fumbling with her buttons, as she realized where they were. "I can't believe you just did that, and I let you. Anyone could have seen us."
"No one did."
"I know, but I've never done anything like that before. I feel wild."
"Oh, man, I wish you hadn't said that. It makes me wish..." He took a deep breath and let it out.
"Maybe I could help you." She put her hand on his thigh, and he jumped.
She smiled, feeling a delicious sense of power now that the tables were turned. "I want to be fair."
"Hey, it's broad daylight."
"That didn't stop you."
"Well, it's going to stop you," he said, removing her hand from his thigh. "Unless you want to end up completely naked on this bench."
"Mm-mm, I have a feeling you could make me forget just about anything."
His eyes darkened, and his breathing grew ragged. "Damn. Damn. Damn. I wish to hell we were in a nice private bedroom right now."
"No one can see," she teased, repeating his own words.
"Okay, let's do it."
His hand moved to his belt buckle and Maggie felt a rush of excitement, followed by fear. "I -- uh."
His eyes twinkled. "Second thoughts, Maggie?"
Maggie didn't get a chance to reply as the train jerked into motion. "Well, too late," she said, feeling both relieved and grateful.
"Saved again," Jeremy said, settling back on his seat. "I'll have to hope the third time's the charm."
Maggie simply smiled as the train continued its slow ascent up the hill. She still couldn't believe her behavior or Jeremy's. Keith wouldn't have dreamed of kissing her or touching her like that where anyone could see. Or maybe he had dreamed of such a thing -- just not with her.
"You think too much," Jeremy said.
She found him watching her again. "It's a bad habit, I know."
"Come here." He put his arm around her, and she rested her head on his chest. She could hear his heartbeat next to her ear, and she felt comforted by it. She had only known him a short time, but it seemed like she'd known him forever. Kissing him, wanting him, loving him seemed so natural, so right. Loving him? No! She couldn't be falling in love! That would be stupid and foolish and impossible. She might even still be legally married.
"Your shoulders are suddenly tense," Jeremy said, rubbing his hand against her tight neck muscles. "What are you worrying about now?"
She sat up and looked at him. "Jeremy, am I leading you on?"
"I sure hope so."
"Are you leading me on?"
His smile faded as his eyes turned serious. "What are you asking me, Maggie?"
"I don't know. I just -- you make me feel things."
"Good things?"
"Very good."
"Then why don't we just go with that -- for the moment."
Maggie slowly nodded. He was right. She didn't have to commit to any feelings right now, and neither did he. And if she was falling in love with him, well, she'd just have to stop.
The train finally pulled into the station at the top of the hill and came to a grinding halt.
"Sorry about the delay, folks," the operator said as he opened the door.
"No problem. We enjoyed ourselves," Jeremy replied.
The man smiled. "It's a great view, isn't it? One of the best in the valley."
"The best I've ever had," Jeremy said.
Maggie nudged him in the ribs, but Jeremy was obviously enjoying himself. "The valley is so lush, so sweet. You can almost taste the wine in the air."
The operator sent him a strange look, then nodded. "Some people say you can get drunk up here just by breathing deep."
"I'll bet. I know I felt--"
"Jeremy, let's go." Maggie steered him away before he could say anything risqué. "You're terrible," she said as they walked into a nearby courtyard.
"I was having a little fun."
"Too much."
"Life is fun, Maggie." He tipped her chin and gave her a quick kiss. "You have to stop worrying so much about everyone and everything."
"Another bad habit. See, you're perfect, and I am terribly flawed."
"Looks that way," Jeremy agreed.
She socked him in the arm.
"Ow."
She laughed. "You're right, life is fun. Come on, let's see if we can get you a little more drunk."
"I think that was my line," he said, following her down the path that led to the winery.
They entered the main building and strolled into the tasting room. It was quiet inside, just one other couple sipping wine, and it wasn't Serena and Keith. They tasted several different wines, then decided to call it quits.
"Do you want to take the tour?" Jeremy asked.
"No, I'm tired, and I've seen enough vats today to write a book about wineries."
"I was thinking the same thing. Only I was plotting out how a body might wind up in one of those big barrels."
"You have a dark side, Jeremy."
He winked at her. "Baby, you don't know the half of it. Wait till I get you alone."
He was teasing, but she couldn't help the nervous shiver that raised goose bumps along her arms. Every time she thought she knew who he was, he said something to unsettle her.
"I'm going to get some water," Jeremy said, heading toward a drinking fountain down the hall. "I'll meet you out front,"
"Okay." Maggie wandered into the courtyard. It was quiet, the late afternoon sun casting shadows through the trees. She rested her elbows on top of the brick wall that wound its way around the grounds. She imagined there would be a spectacular sunset in a few hours. She suddenly felt as if she were a million miles from home, from her life, from herself. She felt guilty, because it felt good to be away.
She had always loved sunsets, the time of night when dusk settled over the city and the stars came out one by one. It was the time when she felt invincible, as if there was a huge world out there waiting for her to conquer. Not that she'd ever tried to do such a thing. She'd always wanted to be a wife and a mother. That had been her goal since she got her first doll and played her first game of house.
But what now? She was still a mother but no longer a wife. How could she play only part of the game? Everyone knew you needed a mother and a father to play house.
Jeremy wouldn't fit into the game. His life was Hollywood. Lights, camera, action. Soon he'd go back to his world, and she'd go back to hers.
They had now, a little voice inside her said. She could have him tonight. She could make every fantasy about sex come true with him. Instinctively, she knew that. She'd never before met a man who could drive every logical thought out of her head with one kiss.
"Maggie! Maggie!"
She turned to see Jeremy waving impatiently at her from the other side of the courtyard. She hurried over to him. "What's wrong?"
"I just saw Serena. Come on."
He ran down the path toward the train station. Maggie hoped they wouldn't be too late.
By the time they got to the station, the train was just pulling away.
"Sorry, folks," the operator said. "The next one will be up in a few minutes."
Maggie caught her breath at the sight of the two people on the train.
A woman turned around and looked back at the winery.
"Serena," Jeremy said.
He waved, but the woman didn't wave back. Instead she laughed and swayed as the man next to her nuzzled her neck.
The man's face was buried behind Serena's long blond hair, so Maggie couldn't get a good look at him. The next thing she knew, Serena had turned around and kissed the man on the mouth. Then the train disappeared from sight.
Maggie couldn't speak. The sight of Serena kissing that man had caused her blood to run cold. Keith had never kissed her like that.
"Damn it all," she said in frustration, stamping her foot like an annoyed child. "I can't believe we missed them again. We were so close."
"Was it him?"
"I think so," she said, wishing she didn't have any doubts, but she still hadn't gotten a good look at his face. "The hair color is exactly the same, but I need to look into his eyes."
"You will. We're close."
"We've been close for the past three days."
"It hasn't been all bad," Jeremy reminded her.
"I know, but..." She walked over and sat down on the bench.
"But what?"
"I'm running out of time."
"When do you have to be back in San Diego?"
"I should have been back yesterday." She got to her feet, restless again. "And I'm sure you have better things to do than chase after Serena."
"Not really." Jeremy tipped his head toward the station, where another train had arrived. "Let's go down the hill and see if we can catch them in the parking lot."
The ride down was a lot shorter than the ride up, with no unexpected stops, and Maggie was too tense to even think about fooling around again. When they exited the train, the parking lot was empty.
Maggie felt her heart sink once again, even though she hadn't really expected them to be there.
"I'm sorry," Jeremy said. "I know you're disappointed."
"It's not your fault. I guess we just aren't meant to catch them." She walked toward their rental car, which was now the only one left in the parking lot. "We might as well go back to the hotel."
"Might as well." Jeremy unlocked the passenger door but paused before opening it. "If your husband truly left you for Serena, he's a fool. You are a beautiful, smart, and exceptionally wonderful woman."
"You don't have to say that."
"It's true, Maggie. You're special. I knew that right away."
"You're really good for my ego."
"You're really good for me."
She smiled. "But we're so different."
"Are we?"
"I need to go home, Jeremy."
"Tomorrow," he said.
She hesitated.
"By the time we drive back to San Francisco, it will be late to catch a flight. I think we should spend the night together. We can dance. We can tell each other all of our fantasies. We can even act some out. So, my little worrier, if you're determined to think about something, why don't you think about that?"
As if she could now think about anything else.
Chapter Nineteen
"Five card stud, jacks are wild," Lisa said as she dealt the cards out on the small table in the waiting room. He'd bought the cards in the hospital gift shop a half hour earlier, needing something to distract them. But he'd forgotten what a competitor Lisa could be.
He picked up his cards and groaned when he saw his hand. "Great. You're almost unbeatable, you know. Are these cards marked?"
Lisa smiled. "No. But just so you know, you do owe me two hundred dollars."
Nick stared at the packages of sweetener he'd swiped from the hospital cafeteria. There were at least ten on her side and only two on his. "That's two hundred dollars?"
"They're each worth ten dollars," she said.
"Says who?"
"Me. How many cards do you want?"
Nick took a look at his hand and sighed again. "I'll just stick with these. I'll be broke soon anyway."
"You're so easy. I'll bet ten." She tossed one packet onto the table.
"I'll see your ten and raise you ten."
"Feeling cocky, I see." Lisa tossed two more packages onto the table. "I'll call, since you have nothing left to bet."
"Rub it in, why don't you?" He showed his hand. "Three aces."
Her jaw dropped open. "No way. You looked like you had two threes at best."
He grinned. "That is called bluffing, sweetheart."
She threw down her cards in disgust. "You must have cheated."
"You dealt."
"You cut the cards."
He laughed out loud. "You're a sore loser."
"I am not," she said, sitting back in a huff, her arms crossed in front of her chest.
"You still have more packets than me," he pointed out.
She straightened in her chair. "Okay, double or nothing."
"Forget it, I'm done."
"You can't quit on a winning hand, Nick."
"Why not?"
"I deserve a chance to get my money back."
Nick leaned forward until their heads were almost touching. "I hate to break it to you, Lisa, but we're not playing for money, we're playing for artificial sweetener."
She made a face at him. "It's the principle."
He shook his head. "Does Raymond know how competitive you can be?"
"Yes, and he likes it. Because he's a shark in business, far worse than me." She shuffled the cards, her fingers flying with practiced speed.
"And you like that?" Nick asked, watching her, wishing she'd look at him instead of the cards.
"Of course. I admire him a great deal."
Funny how she never said the word love. "Do you think it will be easy to work together and live together at the same time?" he asked. "Or maybe you are already?" For some reason, that thought left a bitter taste in his mouth.
"No, we aren't," Lisa said, still shuffling the cards with restless fingers. "I have a nice one-bedroom condo in Studio City. I've enjoyed having my own place to decorate. I even wallpapered the bedroom myself."
"I remember the first time you put up wallpaper."
She grinned as she looked at him, her blue eyes sparkling. "The glue didn't stick, and in the middle of the night all the paper in our bedroom started falling down."
"And you ran around the room naked, trying to push it back up."
"I couldn't believe how much time I'd spent to have it fall apart. But this time I got it right."
His smile disappeared. This time she 'd gotten it right. Her life was so much better now, without him.
"I still kill plants, though," she said, watching him closely. "If it's any consolation."
"It is."
"That's what I figured." She threw the cards down, stood up and walked across the waiting room, then back again. She checked her watch. "It's been over three hours. How long could it take?"
"I don't know." He hated the look of worry that crossed her face. For a while, they'd managed to keep the fear at bay, but it was back.
"Maybe I should call my mother again."
"She has everything under control, Lisa."
"I know, but it would give me something to do." She paused. "I should be working on my cereal slogan."
Nick stroked his chin. "How about this? If you've got a brain, try our grain. Not bad, huh?"
She laughed. "That was beyond terrible."
"Like you've got anything better. At least you know your boss won't fire you."
"I still want to do a good job. I don't use our relationship to take advantage at work." She stopped abruptly, jerking to her feet as the surgeon entered the room. Nick felt every muscle in his body tense as he stood up, and he was more than a little grateful when Lisa's hand found its way into his.
"She's fine," the surgeon said, offering a bright smile.
"Oh, thank heavens," Lisa let out a long, relieved sigh.
"I want to keep her overnight, but if everything looks good in the morning, we'll send her home."
"That
soon?" he asked in surprise.
"As long as she does well tonight, there's really no need to keep her here."
"I'm staying with her tonight," Lisa said. "I can't leave her alone all night in a hospital."
"That's fine. She's in recovery now. One of the nurses will be in shortly to take you to see her. She'll sleep for awhile, though."
"Thank you, doctor," Nick said.
The surgeon nodded, then left.
Lisa turned in Nick's arms and hugged him. "She's okay. She's really okay."
He squeezed her tightly, having the sudden urge to never let her go. "We made it."
Lisa smiled up at him. "Yeah, we made it."
'"Not everything has to turn out bad."
"I guess not."
He gazed into her eyes. "You shouldn't deny yourself the chance to have another child, Lisa. You would be a good mother."
Her smile disappeared, and her eyes darkened with a yearning he hadn't seen in a very long time. "It would be a risk. It's not like she -- like our baby died of something specific. What if the same thing happened? What if there's something genetically wrong with me?"
"It could have been my genes."
"I don't see you rushing to have another child."
"I would do it again -- with you."
Her eyes widened in shock. "That's not going to happen, Nick."
"Then I guess I won't have children, either."
"You and me, us, together," Lisa said, waving her hand in the air. "That was the problem, Nick. If you had a baby with someone else, it probably wouldn't happen again."
"Then why not you and Raymond?" He paused, giving her a chance to reply, but she didn't say a word. "You don't have to answer that, Lisa. I know why, because you're afraid. I'm afraid, too. That's why I could only do it again with you, because we both know what it feels like to lose a child. We would go into the situation knowing exactly the same things."
"We're not together any more."
His arms locked around her waist, mocking her statement.
"Let me go," she said.
"No." He leaned over and kissed her before she had time to close her mouth. He let his tongue dance along her lips and inside the warm cavern of her mouth.
Her hands tightened on his arms, but she didn't push him away. In fact, she seemed to pull him closer, and when he deepened the kiss, he heard a soft sigh of delight. It undid him completely. He had only meant to kiss her briefly, but now he couldn't stop.
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