by Michelle Fox
She touched her throat. “The bite is not a big deal. A little redness and a faint mark I can cover with makeup has been the worst of it. So, let me get this straight, you actually believe you can turn into a bear and bite someone? That’s the secret that’s prevented you from returning my phone calls?”
“Andi, there’s no sense in arguing. It’s simple to prove.” He stood and unfastened the top snap of his jeans.
Her hands flew wide. “Wait! What are you doing?”
“I’m taking my pants off.”
“Why?”
“I can’t shift to bear form wearing tight jeans.” He tugged the denim past the sweeping curves of his muscular thighs then kicked the pants aside. He stood in front of her, naked and hard.
Her face heated at the sight of Mac’s erection. “Oh, my God, you’re going commando.”
“Watch,” he demanded.
“Your naked ass is in my face. How the hell could I do anything but watch?”
Sinking to the floor, Mac hunkered on all fours. The muscles of his back rippled and the bones shifted. His hands clawed the rug before transforming into massive padded paws. Gingery brown fur shot across his torso and covered his limbs. He swelled in size and a muzzle with a shiny black nose projected from his face. With an eardrum-puncturing roar, he stood, towering in grizzly form. The bear’s heavy forearms flailed at the air and its head grazed the ceiling beams. Grrrrowl!
She slumped low into the chair and recoiled. “Holy crap! I can’t believe what I’m seeing.” Lurching forward, she placed her hand over her mouth. “This is too much.” The room spun. “Oops, I think the grilled cheese is coming up.” She gagged.
With a swift swoosh of fur and flesh, he transformed back into a man. He immediately grabbed his pants from the floor and stepped into them. In a flash, he was at her side, smoothing her hair from her brow. “Andi, are you okay? I shouldn’t have roared.”
“Noise isn’t the problem.” She chocked back a sob. “You really are a grizzly. Wow, I just got used to the friendly bear on the trail thing. Hold on.” Still reeling, she gripped the chair. “This one is going to take a moment. God, I hope I don’t throw up on you.”
Mac grinned. “I have a feeling you’re going to be okay. Andi, you are incredibly brave. I knew you would be. I’ve been waiting for a woman like you my entire life. Cross my heart, I’ve never shown myself in grizzly form to anyone outside the bear clan. You’re the first.”
“This is your secret? You didn’t call me back because you’re a bear? Wow, this is hard to wrap my head around. I did wonder why a guy like you was single.”
“It’s not something you can casually share on Tinder. ‘Swipe right. Let’s meet for a beer. By the way, I’m a bear.’”
“Yeah, that line probably wouldn’t work or would be misunderstood.” She drank in the sincerity shining in his eyes, and relaxed. “Mac, what are you exactly?”
“I’ve got a human heart just like you. I’m a man who wants all the things any normal person would want, yet I don’t get to be normal. I’ve been starving for someone to share my life with. I’d like to have a real home, not just a cabin provided by the county for seasonal use. For the past couple of years, I’ve been pretending I can live without these things, but I can’t. Keeping an ancient secret isn’t worth watching my life tick away.”
“Why me? Did I just happen to cross your path at the right time?”
“No. You’re something special.”
“I’m not fishing for compliments. I’m just trying to understand all this. What makes me special?”
“I think you’re absolutely gorgeous. You’re strong-minded and you know what you want. That’s the trait of a leader.”
“Being a leader has left me lonely too. To be honest, I’ve never met my match. I’ve dated a lot of great guys, and I was even engaged for a short time when I was just out of college. Big mistake. I wasn’t ready and he couldn’t handle a woman who wanted to be the boss.”
“Bossy doesn’t scare a grizzly. I love it.”
“I just watched you turn into a bear, so why am I telling you my dating history instead of screaming my head off?”
He drew a tense breath. “Because there is nothing normal about what is happening between us. We’re courting. You have to open up to me. In this case, you don’t have a choice. These are the pheromones talking.”
She leaped to her feet. “What?”
“That bite you received from the grizzly is having a physical and emotional effect on you.”
“No. I’m in control of me.”
“Nope, sorry, boss. It doesn’t work that way. Until the next new moon, the bear is in control. That tiny bite is still active in your bloodstream. You will do and think things you don’t normally do.”
“Like hike and do push-ups?”
“Yes. It set off a cascade of reactions that will make you more receptive to accepting the possibility of….” He smacked his palm on forehead. “I’m screwing this up so badly! I’m making it sound as stilted and awful as that fifth-grade lecture about the miracle of life, minus the squirm-worthy slideshow.”
“Oh, God. Where is this conversation going?”
“Andi, I want you. You’re perfect for me, but, sweetheart, my bear set you up. You’re primed and giving off a she-bear mate scent. I am trying so hard not to scoop you into my arms and then toss you onto my bed.”
“Actually, I would like that.”
“But it wouldn’t be fair. I want to give you a fighting chance to get to know me and choose me without the goddamn bite interfering in your decisions.”
“Pheromones as in chemical attractant, the same sort moths use to lure other moths deeper into the jungle? Is that what we are talking about? You think the bite is affecting my mind?”
“I know it is.”
“Bear bite or not, Mac, I think you’re very attractive. I didn’t need to be bitten to notice you’re a hulky, hot filet mignon with hair on its chest.”
“There’s more. The bear wants a mate for life.”
“The bear or you? I’m getting confused.”
“We are one and the same and come as a package deal.”
“Can I mix and match? Say take the man as a lover and keep the bear for a hiking companion?”
He shook his head.
“Why?”
“After we’ve finished this conversation, I’m going to grab my keys, get in my truck, and drive.”
“You’re going to leave me?”
“It’s the only way. I can’t be this close and not want to touch you.”
She reached out and stroked his arm. “Touching is allowed. Mac, I’ve been thinking about you non-stop.”
“I believe you. I’ve obsessed about you too. It’s a trust issue. The bear has already bitten you once. I can’t trust myself. It would be so easy to get carried away, kiss your throat, and bite. Every cell in my body is screaming for me to do it.”
“You mean nip?”
“Andi, I would never harm you. But that second nip, delivered so close to the first one, is a one-way street.”
“To where? Temptation? I say we go there.”
“No, we’d be headed to Bearsville. The second bite will load enough pheromones into your system to cause the physical transformation to begin. You won’t just want to hike the hills. You’ll need to lumber around on all fours—at least part of the time. Andi, you’ll turn into a she-bear.”
“No fucking way!”
“Exactly. I was born a bear, but you would have to volunteer. I would never thrust something as extreme as bear transformation on you no matter how lonely I was. Force never works. It would be a disaster. For centuries, MacBrun women have always been offered a choice about becoming a bear or not.”
“The MacBruns are all bears—bearserkers?”
“Yes. In 1173 AD, an ancestor of mine had himself and his brothers blessed by an enchantress before going into battle. The blessing was decidedly unchristian and done in secret. The men donned b
earskins of the most powerful bulls in the forest and swore a blood oath to Ursulmar, the great northern god of bears.” Mac offered his forearm and pointed at a tattoo. “Do you see the shape that resembles a horseshoe and a claw? That’s the mark of Ursulmar.”
She grazed her fingers over his arm. “There’s so much hair here. I saw the tattoo, but didn’t recognize it.”
“On the battlefield, my ancestors fought like demons possessed. They decimated their foes with ease, but victory came at a high price. In order to fight with the frenzied strength of a bear, we were also compelled to become bears. You see, my ancestors didn’t realize until after the fact that the enchanted bearskins they wore into battle had melded with their souls. It became impossible to be parted from them. Afterward, the MacBrun clan and the bears were forever one.”
“Mac, you look so serious. I have to be frank, you’re scaring me.”
“You should be a little scared. It’s a normal reaction to something most people will never have to cope with. What started as an advantage on the battlefield soon became a liability. Can you image the horror of falling into battle rage and then never being able to get out of it? That’s what happened to my ancestors. As mercenaries, they slogged from one gritty, blood-drenched battle to the next, hiring themselves out to any lord who could pay—wishing battle would kill them before they killed again.”
“That sounds horrible. How did they get themselves under control?”
“They took wives. The same enchantress who cast the spell told them marriage would balance their bearserker spirits. At this point, the MacBrun warriors had accrued much wealth, but they were not welcome in established aristocratic bloodlines. They were still fur-clad, coarse, and half battle-crazed. Instead of facing rejection, they were instructed by the enchantress to choose wives from among women no one else would claim. Impoverished widows, orphans, or the plain girls who walked with a limp topped the list. Those wives were taken in and cherished. You see, the enchantress who cast the spell knew if the MacBrun men could tone themselves down enough to be gentle with heartbroken women, they would regain control over themselves and their raging inner bears.”
How many times had she wished to be special in someone’s eyes and a boon to their life? Her throat ached from holding back unshed tears. “That is a wonderful story.”
“And it’s all true. Now here I am sitting across from you and scared to death. You’re beautiful, smart, and ambitious and you don’t need me for a single goddamned thing. I’ve even gone too far and done something you might hate me for later.”
“Mac, you haven’t turned me into a bear.”
“Not yet, but I want to. My bite will eventually wear away. You have until the next bear-claw moon to be free. The choice has to be yours. I’d never trick you or use force. That’s why I should leave.”
“Both you and the bear have been gentlemen.”
“If I kiss you or stay here a moment longer, good manners and gentlemanly behavior will go out the window.”
“Were you listening to yourself when you told me the MacBrun legend? You’ve been my hero twice and demanded nothing in return. You’ve treated me with real gentleness too. I’ll be candid with you. On my first trip up the mountain, I felt pretty broken. I’d focused my life on getting ahead with my career and taking care of my mother. The thought of ending up as vulnerable as she was scared the hell out of me. The anxiety left me socially crippled. I don’t really date. As soon as I sense a man is trying to take control of my time and freedom, I shut them down. I wanted to give my mother everything she never had. I did, and it’s over now. This past year, while I sat with my mom during her chemo treatments, as a distraction we’d talk about silly things.” She swayed in the chair. “At the clinic, they seat you in these big padded recliners and hook the patient up to an IV. The process feels like it takes forever. I tried to always go with her and keep her company. Several sessions in, I noticed my mother never mentioned the condo on the beach or the new car I bought her. In her most unguarded moments, she wanted to talk about things I had done when I was a baby, like covering the bathroom floor in talcum powder and using it to draw pictures. Of course, I didn’t remember any of it, but we laughed anyway. Movies we’d seen together came up often, or her fixing my hair into an overelaborate updo for my high school graduation, which required forty bobby pins to keep in place. Stuff like that. During one of those treatments, it hit me hard that if I ever take my turn in the chair, what would I have to talk about that wouldn’t bore someone else to tears?”
He reached out and held her hand. The callused edge of his thumb traced circles on her palm.
Andi looked into his eyes. His lashes were so dense and black they cast shadows on his cheeks. “Mac, I’m pretty sure you and the bear are my story. I doubt life will offer me anything better or more magical than the two of you. For the past ten days, you’re all I’ve thought about. Don’t say it’s simply the pheromones talking, because I choose to call it fate.”
So many conflicting emotions rolled across Mac’s features; she couldn’t decide if he was about to sob or smile. “Mac?”
“Yes?” He sounded rough and unsteady.
“Take me to bed.”
Chapter Eight
A log in the iron stove crackled and split with a hiss. She waited in silence while Mac wrung his hands and stalled.
“Andi, I can’t guarantee I’ll be able to control myself.”
“I think you can. It’s time to believe in yourself. As far as I’m concerned, you’ve done everything right.”
“But I could lose it so easily and bite. It wouldn’t take much. The smallest nick will do. You need to understand that you’ll become what I am, and there is no going back.”
In exasperation, she struck the tabletop with her palm. “I couldn’t go back to my old life even if I wanted to. I don’t fit there anymore. My old life ended when I hydroplaned my SUV and drove over the cliff. What I need is a future worth living.” She paused, breathless. “Take me to bed.”
“Don’t think I’m not tempted! Why did you come back so soon, sweetheart? I told you to wait. Don’t make me feel any more guilt than I already do.”
“Do you bite women often?”
“Never.”
“That’s what I thought. Am I someone special?”
The tension melted from his face and his eyes glistened. “Oh, God, yes. More than I ever hoped for.”
“You don’t have to bite me now, do you?”
“Of course I don’t have to bite. I’m just afraid I won’t be able to resist.”
“Earlier this evening, the grizzly had every opportunity to nip me and didn’t. You’re a man—are you less trustworthy than the bear?”
“It’s a huge risk with no plan B if something goes wrong. One nick, and boom, you’re a she-bear.”
“Maybe I’m ready to be a bear.”
“Or maybe you just need to sober up from the pheromone cocktail you’re currently under the influence of before you make such a rash choice.”
“Mac, if you drag your feet a second longer, I swear, I’m ready to lunge across this table and nip you.” She rose from her chair and walked toward him. Standing in front of Mac, she placed her hand on her hip. “Well, are you going to offer me a seat?”
He slid aside so she could take his chair.
Thrusting her palm against his chest, she brought him to a halt. “I don’t want your chair, I want to sit in your lap.”
A heavy sigh escaped him. “Not a great idea.”
“Indulge me.” She slipped onto his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. Her weight settled across his muscular thighs and a solid bulge rose in between. Deliberately, she pressed her lush bottom against him. “You can’t deny that part of you is enjoying having me on your lap.”
His heavy arms locked around her waist. “All of me is enjoying being this close.” The tip of his nose grazed her hair. “You smell sweet and feel so soft, but is it wise to tease a growly bear with your gorgeous ass?
”
Leaning close, she slowly, lovingly kissed the gritty edge of his jaw, then his forehead, and finally his mouth. As he closed his eyes, his breath stilled. The moment lingered. Andi pressed her lips to his and whispered, “I’m not teasing. I’m offering. I’m telling you the truth when I say I’ve never been this turned on in my life.”
“Andi, we barely know each other, but my instincts are telling me that you’re the one. I’m certain I’ll never find a better match. Just so you know, MacBruns mate for life.”
She glided her fingertips across the silky hair on his chest. “I can’t think that far ahead. Let’s become lovers and take one day at a time.”
“Sounds fair.” Mac scooped an arm beneath her and lifted her against his chest as he rose.
“Whoa!” she squealed, and held on tight.
Taking long steady strides, he walked toward the bed and tossed her gently on the mattress. She bounced and rolled onto her elbow to look up at him with a smile. “You are the only man who’s ever picked me up and carried me like that.”
“I’m happy to be your first.” A broad grin accentuated a dimple in his cheek. His brushy black hair had dried slightly rumpled and wild. Like a redwood toppling, he fell facedown onto the bed beside her, and then drew her into his arms. He stroked a strand of hair from her cheek and gazed into her eyes. “Are we crazy to let things move this fast?”
“Ask me later. I’ve never fallen in lust with a bear before.”
Tangling his hand in her hair, he pulled her close. “Andi.” Warm breath bathed her cheek. His mouth grazed hers in a featherlight stroke. “I’m a lot more than just in lust with you. I’m already in—”