by LuAnn McLane
“So do you have some big news?” Luke raises his eyebrows and waits.
“Yeah . . . believe it or not Cody West wants me to host a show with him once a month. Apparently he was pleased with the results of the first one.” I raise my palms up. “Go figure.”
Luke cups my chin with his hand. “Macy, I’m not one bit surprised. You are starting to come into your own. Embrace it and for goodness sake give yourself some credit. Now this truly is a chance of a lifetime. Take it.”
I lean my cheek into his palm and remember how amazing it felt to be cuddled in his arms. My God, could anything be worth giving that up? “Luke, what was the one condition you were going to tell me?”
He drops his hand from my chin and waves his hand through the air. “Oh . . . um . . .” He shrugs and then says, “That they provide a car. You know, since I’ll have some traveling to do to visit family . . . and you.” He clears his throat and then glances down at his watch. “I should get to the airport soon. I wouldn’t want to miss my flight.”
“Okay,” I say brightly, although I want to burst into tears. “Do you want me to drive you?”
His dark eyebrows come together. “No, that’s okay. I’ll just park in long-term. I won’t be there for more than a few days, I’m sure.”
I nod since tears are clogging my throat. I know that I should walk him to the door but my body suddenly feels as if it’s made of wood and too stiff to move. With an effort I push up from the sofa and follow him to the door. I realize that he’s leaving early and it feels as if he’s trying to get away as quickly as possible. I’m hurt and confused but I swallow the tears and pain and dig deep for a smile.
“Have a safe trip.”
“Thanks.”
“Call me when you make your final decision.”
He nods. “They have to offer me the job first.”
“I’m sure they will,” I tell him, and wonder if it would be horrible of me to pray that they don’t. Yeah, I suppose so . . .
When he leans in and kisses me tenderly on the mouth my heart shatters. I want to cling . . . plead, wrap myself around his legs and prevent him from leaving.
“I’ll call you,” he says, and I nod again, barely holding it together, but as soon as I close the door I slither to the floor and burst into tears. Usually, I cry loudly but these are silent, gut-wrenching sobs that feel as if they are coming directly from my shattered heart.
I’m not quite sure how long I sit there and cry. In between the sobs I say things out loud to myself like, “I should have stopped him. Pleaded with him to take the Vandy job.” I silently sob a bit more and then answer my sorry self, “No, that would have been wrong.” Inhaling a shaky breath I say, “I should have said that I’d go to Florida with him. Screw the Grillin’ and Chillin’ gig.” Swiping at a tear and my dripping nose I grumble, “I know Luke and he’d never let me do that.”
Finally all cried out I swallow, lift the tail of my shirt to dab at my face that’s leaking everywhere, and then simply sit there in the doggone dark for goodness knows how long. I know I should get up and go to bed but, somehow feeling the need to suffer, instead I curl up in a pathetic little ball, rest my head on my hands, and fall into a crappy, fitful sleep.
Something thumping has my eyes fluttering, trying to open but after my crying jag my eyelids feel made of lead and my eyeballs as if on fire. Mumbling beneath my breath I try to get comfortable on the floor, which of course is impossible, and then the thumping begins again. I think it could be my head pounding but then it finally dawns on me that it’s someone knocking on the door directly behind me.
“Ohimgod.” I scramble to a sitting position and push my tangled hair from my eyes. What if it’s Luke coming back? Maybe he got to the airport and had this lightbulb moment telling him that no doggone job was worth losing me . . . head coach or not. I just bet he made an illegal U-turn and has come barreling back here to sweep me into his arms and declare his undying love.
Bang . . . bang, bang!
“Okay!” I try to shout but apparently even sorry-ass silent sobs mess with vocal chords, because all that comes out is a froglike croak. I push up to my feet and start to open the door when I realize with mounting horror how dreadful I must look. I can’t let Luke see me all puffy, red-eyed with mascara making black tracks down my cheeks, which I’m sure, is how I appear.
Then again, I have to answer the door. But why in such a wonderful moment do I have to look like crap?
Life just is not fair!
“Macy McCoy, open up this damned door or I will be forced to break it down. And don’t think I won’t!”
“Jamie Lee?” I say in my bullfrog voice as I fumble for the deadbolt. Hopefully at some point my voice will return to normal.
“None other,” she answers just as I manage to open the door. She’s about to give me a hug when the light from the hallway illuminates my despair. Her eyes widen and she rushes into the room. “Ohmigod, Macy, what’s wrong?”
I stumble across the room and flop down onto the sofa. Jamie Lee follows but sits down in a more mannerly fashion and then reaches over to turn on a light. “Tell me what in the world is the matter with you.”
“What are you doin’ here? You should be with Griff,” I say in a wimpy, croaky tone. I’m beginning to get on my own nerves.
Jamie Lee waves a dismissive hand at me. “The man was with me twenty-four seven for two weeks. Believe me, he deserved a break.”
“So that’s why you’re here? To give Griff a break?”
Jamie Lee nods but I can see right through her.
I narrow my eyes which are burning like tiny little fire pits. “No you’re not. Spill.”
She shakes her head. “No, you first.”
“No way. You drove all the way here at this hour to tell me something . . .” I gasp and put my hand over my mouth. I can think of only one thing that she would want to tell me in person. “Oh.” I swallow and I don’t know how there is any moisture left in my tear ducts but my eyes well up. “Oh . . . oh, oh! Jamie Lee, are you”—I swallow again and then half squeak, half croak—“pregnant?”
“I think so!” She nods and then puts a hand over her belly. “I did a pregnancy test three times and wanted to do another but Griff put his foot down on that one. They all came back positive. I must have gotten pregnant right before the wedding. Of course I’m tellin’ Mama it happened on the honeymoon. I was a few days late, but feeling kinda weird . . . you know, icky and all that. At first I thought it was jet lag but then I had the funny feeling that I might be . . . and I am!”
“Wow, already?”
Jamie Lee shrugs. “We had decided after the wedding not to use protection and just let nature take its course. After Daddy’s heart troubles we had discussed not waiting on account of you just never know and thought we’d start trying right away. Of course it’ll also get Mama off my back. Yeah, I didn’t expect it to happen this doggone quick but Macy, I’m over the moon and Griff is so danged proud of himself,” she says with a chuckle. “No seriously, he is ecstatic and my goodness he is going to be such a good father.” She rolls her eyes, “Good thing since I have my doubts on my mothering skills.”
“You will be an amazing mother,” I tell her firmly.
She gives me a deadpan stare.
“With your mama’s help of course.”
Jamie Lee laughs. “Oh there will be way too much of that, let me tell ya.”
“Does Daisy know?”
“Not yet. I’m going to announce it tomorrow at dinner but I couldn’t wait to tell you. I just couldn’t give you the news over the phone. Griff finally told me to get in the car and head here. I had to get the directions to your apartment from Brandon since Luke didn’t pick up his phone.”
At the mention of Luke’s name I get all teary-eyed again.
“Oh no, don’t tell me your state of mind has to do with my brother? I’ll kick his ass if he’s hurt you.” Jamie Lee takes one look at me and says, “Okay, start from the beginning
and don’t leave anything out. Boy oh boy, I leave town for two weeks and all hell breaks loose.”
I try to laugh but it comes out a gurgle. Then inhaling a deep, shaky breath I begin my crazy tale, starting with when Tammy came into the shop even though Jamie Lee already knows that part. I tell her everything except for the amazing sex since Luke is her brother and all . . .
When I’m finished I say, “Just what am I supposed to do? It’s like bein’ between a rock and a hard place, Jamie Lee. I can’t ask Luke not to take a Division One head coaching job.”
“Yeah, but Macy, don’t you dare give up this opportunity. You could be like the next Rachael Ray . . . well, except for the cookin’ part. But your personality rocks. I can see this leading to more and, my goodness, to be doin’ hair for Tammy Turner? No man is worth givin’ all this up for.”
“Really now, would Griff be worth it?”
“Okay, you’re not playin’ fair.”
“I love your brother,” I tell her quietly, and then we’re both on the verge of crying. “Is anything worth giving that up for?”
Jamie Lee puts her feet up on the coffee table and sighs. “You have a doggone good point but Luke would never let you give it all up.”
“See, that’s what I was afraid of. I think he just might have been ready to ask me to go to Florida with him when Tammy called and gave me what should have been the amazing news about Cody West wantin’ me to do Grillin’ and Chillin’. Now I’ll never know.”
Jamie Lees frowns. “Wow, this sucks.”
“Royally.”
“Maybe they won’t offer him the job.”
“Oh come on, Jamie Lee. Besides, he seemed pretty confident they would.”
“Well, let’s just pray they don’t.”
“Jamie Lee, that wouldn’t be right!”
She shrugs. “We can let God decide that one.”
I muster up a laugh and then we’re hugging. “I’ve missed you. I hate to leave the Cut and Curl. You know that, right?”
“We’re all grown up, Macy. Life changes but we will always, always be best friends. Come hell or high water. No matter what!”
We high-five and do the secret handshake. “Let’s get some rest. I’m off tomorrow, so I can be there for the big announcement.”
“Okay, but you have to act surprised. If Mama knew I told you first she’d be ticked forever and I’m going to need some serious help with the mothering thing.”
“You will not!”
She looks at me with one eyebrow arched.
“Well okay maybe a teensy bit,” I admit. “Babies don’t come with instructions.”
“I know . . . What was God thinkin’?”
We laugh and cry and chat for a little while longer before stumbling dead-dog tired into my bedroom.
Jamie Lee takes one look at the pile of clothes and says without missing a beat, “Couldn’t decide what to wear?”
“You know me like no other.”
We both laugh until we’re snorting and then fall into a deep sleep . . . And I still swear that I don’t snore.
24
What Matters Most
Jamie Lee arrives at her parents’ house a good fifteen minutes before me since she’s a speed demon. When I get out of my car she’s waiting on the backyard porch petting Cassie, but when the old collie sees me, she comes bounding down the steps with her tongue hanging sideways out of her mouth.
“Hey there, Cassie girl,” I croon to her when she jumps up on her hind legs to be petted. “Miss me, girl?”
“Cassie, get down,” Jamie Lee scolds, but Cassie as usual doesn’t pay any attention. The only person she obeys is Daisy. “Mama and Daddy aren’t here. She must be closing up shop and Daddy is most probably fishin’. Mama’s got something cookin’ in the Crock-Pot, though. I’ve got to learn how to use one of those things. You just dump everything in and turn it on, right?”
“I think so.” I make a mental note to have Cody do a Crock-Pot show. “And then you come home and dinner is done. You got one at your bridal shower from Miss Irma. She called it the best invention of all time.”
“I’ve got to unpack that sucker. By the way, Griff is heading over.”
“Good.” After taking a seat on the porch steps I inhale a deep breath of fresh country air.
“Here.” She hands me a Mountain Dew. “Thought you might be thirsty.”
“Thanks.” I take the cold can and pop the top. After it hisses and fizzes I take a long, sweet, and tangy swig. “Jamie Lee, you need to stop drivin’ like a bat outta hell. You’ve got that little bun in the oven to consider.”
Jamie Lee puts a hand to her belly and sits up straight. “Ohmigod, you’re right. I’m already putting her in danger and she isn’t even born yet!” she wails, and her eyes well up in unaccustomed emotion when I fully expected her to come back at me with a smart-mouth remark. “I suck.”
I pat Jamie Lee’s leg. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get you worked up. I was just making an observation. Her? So you think it’s a girl?”
“Oh, I don’t know but it’s fun to let Griff think that he’s gonna have to deal with a mini-me.” She sniffs and then waves her hand at me. “You won’t believe the crap that makes me cry. Television commercials . . . ohmigod, songs.” She shakes her head. “I’m a basket case. Poor Griff. Yesterday I told him that his aftershave was making me queasy. He immediately went and took a shower!” She chuckles. “It’s gonna be a long nine months for him.”
“He’s gonna be pamperin’ you and lovin’ every minute of it.”
Jamie Lee smiles and then her eyes tear up again. “Oh stop!”
“Stop what? Talkin’? Cuz everything I say makes you blubber.”
Jamie Lee puts her hands up in the air. “Darned if I know,” she says with a laugh. “Let’s head inside. It’s gettin’ hot out here. Plus we can sample what Mama has in the Crock-Pot. I’m starvin’.”
“Sounds good.”
“Cassie,” Jamie Lees scolds when her dog follows us into the house, but as always she lets her stay. Daisy will grumble but let her stay as well unless she makes the mistake of begging. Then out the door she’ll go.
“It smells so good. What’s in the pot?”
Jamie Lee lifts the lid and peers inside. Taking a deep whiff she proclaims, “Beef stew!” We both sneak a quick bite. “Yummy. All I do is eat. Weird stuff. I was craving SPAM.”
“Ew.”
“I know. And this is just the beginning.” She shakes her head but then takes another big bite. A few minutes later her mama and daddy arrive.
“Macy!” Daisy says, and gives me a fierce hug for someone so tiny. “My, my but you’re a sight for sore eyes.”
Her daddy hugs me as well. “Good to see you, sweetie.”
“So what brings y’all here on a weekday?”
“A home-cooked meal. Macy had the day off and wanted to visit.”
“Well it’s a nice surprise,” she says with a smile. “I’ll just throw some biscuits in the oven and we’ll be good to go. Is Griff comin’ over too?” she asks, but is answered when the back door opens. He takes his boots off in the mudroom before entering the kitchen.
After greeting everyone he gives Jamie Lee a brief kiss on the cheek but makes the mistake of putting his hand on her belly.
“Oh!” Daisy who doesn’t miss a beat puts her hands to her cheeks. “Jamie Lee! Baby girl, are you expectin’?”
Jamie Lee presses her lips together while nodding her head. “Yes, Mama.”
“So soon? Well, praise the Lord! Oh!” She throws her hands up in the air and does a little jig that has us all laughing and then doing a silly jig too . . . well, Griff and her daddy refrain but join in for a group hug mixed with tears . . . well, not tears from the guys either, although they both noisily clear their throats and shove each other.
“Hey, what’s goin’ on?” We all turn to see Luke standing in the doorway with a look of concern on his face. “Everything okay?” My heart of course skips a
beat at the mere sight of him.
“You tell him,” Daisy says to Jamie Lee.
“Luke . . . I’m gonna have a baby.”
The worried expression on his face changes to a grin. “Congratulations!” He slaps Griff on the back. “That was quick, you dog, you.” He turns and envelops Jamie Lee in a bear hug.
“Careful,” Daisy warns.
“Oh!” Luke backs off but then leans in and kisses her gently on the cheek.
“Mama, chill. I’m not gonna break,” Jamie Lee scoffs. “You know I’m going back to work tomorrow.”
Everyone starts chatting at once and I’m doing my best not to look at Luke but I have to wonder why he isn’t in Florida. Finally his daddy asks for me. “Son, I thought you were on an interview. What gives? Did you already accept the job?”
Okay, now I have to look at him.
He leans back against the kitchen counter for a moment and then explains, “I was on my way to the university when this song, ‘Honky Tonk Badonkadonk,’ comes on the radio and I knew I had to turn around.”
They all look at him as though he’s crazy but my heart starts to pound. I put my hands on the back of a kitchen chair for support.
“The song reminded me of what matters most in life.”
“ ‘Honky Tonk Badonkadonk’?” Jamie Lee angles her head at her brother. “Just what have you been smokin’, big brother?”
“Jamie Lee,” Daisy says in the same exasperated tone she’s been using with her daughter every day I can remember, “you know your brother doesn’t do that . . . stuff.”
“Yeah but . . . ,” Jamie Lee begins, and then stops. “Oh . . .” She puts her hands to cheeks and looks at Luke with wide eyes. “ ‘Oooo-weee, shut my mouth, slap my grandma,’ ” she quietly quotes the song, and then her face splits into a wide grin.
“Okay I’m lost,” Daisy complains, and stomps her foot. “What’s this about slappin’ a grandma? I’m gonna be one here shortly, so watch what you’re sayin’.”
“The song Luke is referrin’ to is the ring tone on Macy’s cell phone,” Griff has the decency to explain.