“He knows.”
“So, why isn’t he here?”
Robert was close to blurting out the truth of it—that Reuben had gone fancy and likely wouldn’t ever be returning to Hollybrook to live. He gulped. Was that true? He’d never gone so far with it in his mind, but there it was—laid out before him in agonizing truth.
“You do know Lindy is sweet on him, don’t you?” Rachel asked, taking a step closer to him.
Of course, he knew, but he’d never discussed it with Rachel. He wondered why she was bringing it up now. He didn’t want to talk about it. Didn’t want to talk about his brother at all.
So, he merely nodded and said, “Why don’t you go on in and see if Mamm’s awake?”
For a quick second, she narrowed her eyes, but then she smiled widely at him. “I will. Will you be out here when I’m finished visiting? It’d be nice to see you again before I go.”
“I should be. I have more chores. There’s always something needing to be done.”
“I won’t stay long. It’s a lot later than I intended to visit today. Mamm will be expecting me home to help with supper.”
He nodded again and watched her turn and walk toward the house. She moved with a smoothness he found captivating. It was the first thing he’d noticed about her, even when she was younger. She moved like rich molasses, effortlessly and sweetly. He nearly laughed out loud. Moved like molasses? What was he becoming? A poet?
He was still chuckling when he turned back to pick up the pitchfork.
* * *
“Rachel, you came,” Lindy greeted her as Rachel stepped into the kitchen.
“I did. Sorry, I’m so late, but Mamm had me weeding all the front flower beds. I’m sure I don’t know why, the season will be over soon enough.”
“Those flowers will still be blooming in October,” Lindy said. “Plenty of time yet.”
“I saw Robert.”
“Oh, did you? That’s gut then. Isn’t that why you came over in the first place?” Lindy asked with a knowing smile.
“Ach, Lindy. I came to see how Berta was doing.”
“Umm hmm.”
Rachel gave Lindy a playful slap. “You’re terrible.”
“Just telling the truth.” Lindy had to work to keep her smile bright. If it faded, even the least little bit, Rachel would know something was wrong. And Lindy wouldn’t be able to tell her how worried she was about Reuben. She didn’t want anyone to know just how callous her beau was acting. In truth, she didn’t know one other Amish boy who would be so insensitive to his mother’s illness.
“Is Berta awake?”
“I’m not sure. She was sleeping earlier. Let’s go see.” Lindy set down the bowl she was using to whip up a batch of biscuits. “Be quiet, though, just in case.”
Rachel made a face. “I’m not stupid.”
Lindy looked at her. No. Rachel was not stupid. She was lucky, that was what she was. Lucky to have a beau who was thoughtful and kind and—
Lindy stopped herself. That kind of thinking would get her nowhere. Nor would it change Reuben for the better. She thought of the letter she’d written him and prayed once again that it would have some effect.
Chapter Eight
Berta stirred when Lindy and Rachel entered the front room.
“Ach, I have a visitor,” she murmured with a feeble smile. “Rachel Shelter, how are you?”
Rachel went to her with her arms outstretched. She leaned down and gave Berta a gentle hug. “Hello, Berta. How are you feeling today?”
“I can’t complain,” she answered, but Lindy saw the stress around her eyes and mouth. She was in pain. How Lindy wished the woman would take the pills sitting right there beside her.
“I said hello to Robert. He’s out in the barn.”
“That boy is a gut worker,” Berta said, taking a shallow breath.
“That he is,” Lindy offered, smiling.
Rachel shot her a look and then turned back to Berta. “Is there anything I can do for you? Would you like a cup of tea? Or some toast, perhaps?”
Berta shook her head. “Nee. Nothing. Lindy gets me everything I want.” Berta’s watery gray eyes rested on Lindy with affection. Then she looked back to Rachel. “You have a wonderful sister.”
Rachel sighed. “Jah. I know. Thank you.”
“Robert’s twin brother…” Berta’s voice trailed off, and Lindy held her breath. She didn’t want Berta getting upset and talking about Reuben was sure to bother her.
“I’m making biscuits for supper,” Lindy said quickly.
“Biscuits?” Berta smiled. “Robert’s favorite.”
Lindy moved forward. “Why not rest a bit now?” she said, seeing that Berta was ready to fall asleep. “We’ll leave you be.”
She took Rachel’s arm to lead her from the room, but Rachel shrugged her off. “If you need anything, Berta, you let me know…”
“Rachel, come on,” Lindy urged.
Rachel followed Lindy from the room and into the kitchen. “You didn’t have to hurry me out,” she said.
“I’m sorry. It’s just that Berta is ready to sleep again. She tires very easily.”
“You’re not her boss…”
Lindy stopped walking and stared at her sister. “What do you mean?”
“I mean maybe I want some time with her, too. Her son is courting me, you know. It only seems right that I spend time with her.”
Lindy felt assaulted by the tone in her sister’s voice. “I’m not trying to stop you from spending time with her. But right now, she needs to rest.”
“You’re trying to wheedle your way into this family. Don’t think I’m not aware of it. Lindy this and Lindy that…”
“Rachel! That’s not true. But I am hired to care for Berta, and part of that care is seeing she gets the rest she needs.”
“She’ll get plenty of rest soon!” Rachel snapped.
At that very moment, Robert came through from the wash room. His face looked stricken upon hearing Rachel’s words. Rachel’s eyes went wide, and she began sputtering.
“Did-did you hear that? I-I didn’t mean it the way it sounded.” She tried desperately to backtrack. “I just meant—”
Lindy gaped at her sister. How could she be so callous? Then her eyes went to Robert and she saw the shock and pain on his face. Rachel gave a strangled sort of laugh.
“I just meant tonight. You know, tonight she can sleep.”
But all three of them knew she hadn’t been referring to that night at all. The air grew thick with their silence as they stared at each other. Then Robert moved to the sink and got a drink of water. Lindy noticed that his hand was shaking. She glanced at his face and saw the anger there.
“Robert, can you walk me out?” Rachel asked, her voice subdued.
He took a deep breath and nodded. “Let’s go,” he said, setting his empty glass on the counter.
Lindy watched them leave, her heart hurting for Robert. Thanks to Rachel, his mother’s impending death hung heavy in the room. Lindy picked up his glass and washed it vigorously, angry right along with Robert. How dare Rachel be so hurtful. She plunked the glass into the drainer and then stepped back from the sink.
Her anger would do no one any good. She pressed her hand against her chest and stepped to the window. Rachel was on her bike now, talking to Robert. By her gestures, it was clear she was still trying to make amends. Robert stood there, looking so identical to Reuben, that Lindy’s breath caught.
It’s Robert. It’s Robert. It’s Robert, she told herself.
Rachel took off riding down the drive, and Robert turned away. His expression was grim as he headed back to the house. Lindy quickly picked up the bowl with the biscuit mix in it and began cutting in the lard. Robert came to the kitchen and paused at the doorway and looked at her.
Lindy’s arm stopped moving, and she just held the bowl in front of her, like a shield.
“I’m sorry,” she murmured, not knowing what else to say.
He scowled and then squared his shoulders. “At least Mamm didn’t hear her.”
“But you did.”
“Jah. I did.” At that moment, his eyes held no green in them. They were gray and cold.
Lindy took a step forward. “I’m sorry,” she said again.
He blinked and his expression softened. “You didn’t say it.”
“I’m sure she didn’t mean it the way it came out.”
“So she says.”
Lindy blew out her breath. She wanted to go to him and take him in her arms and tell him it was going to be all right. But it wasn’t going to be all right. His mother was dying, and they all knew it. And then she realized what she’d just thought. Take him in her arms? What in the world was she thinking?
This wasn’t Reuben.
Ach, Reuben, where are you?
“I may go to Ohio,” Robert said.
“What? Are you going to fetch Reuben home?”
His expression turned hard. “If I have to.”
“I wrote him again. I told him about Berta… Maybe, he’ll listen and return.”
“Maybe.”
A heaviness moved through Lindy, and she set the bowl onto the table. “Is there something more? Something you aren’t telling me?”
Robert flinched as if she’d struck him. “What do you mean?”
“About Reuben. Why he isn’t here. Is he hurt? Has something happened that you don’t want Berta to know?”
Something flickered over his face, and Lindy was certain it was guilt. But it was gone as quickly as it had come.
“He’s just busy,” Robert said. “I don’t think he realizes how sick Mamm is.”
“But we’ve told him—”
Robert shook his head. “I know we have. But he hasn’t seen for himself.”
“Which he would if he’d come home. Surely Otto can spare him for a day or two. After all, look what you’re doing on this farm by yourself. Why does Otto need help so much more than you do? It makes no sense, and if Reuben had any sense of respons—”
She stopped short and clapped her hand over her mouth. It wasn’t her place to judge how this family was run.
Robert raised his chin and gazed at her.
“Ach, but I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it. I am just worried for your mamm…”
“I know that, Lindy. I know your heart.”
He knew her heart? How? She was just the hired help. Nothing more.
The pupils in his eyes widened, and he gave a soft laugh. “Goodness, but I guess all of us are saying things we shouldn’t. Please, don’t worry about it, Lindy. You’re doing an amazing job here, and I am deeply grateful. Mamm is, too. She loves you, you know. And I know you’re concerned about Reuben. Don’t be. I’ll take care of it.”
“But how—”
“You’re fretting again…”
She smiled. “I’m sorry. Now, get on out of the kitchen while I finish supper.” She put on a light tone, trying to recover some sense of normalcy. He played along, laughing and giving her a playful tap on her arm with the back of his hand.
“I’ll be back soon,” he said. “And supper better be ready.”
She laughed at his mock threat, and he left the room.
Chapter Nine
Reuben sat on his sagging couch holding the latest letter from Lindy in his hands. He didn’t want to open it. He dreaded opening it. She would be all cheerful and inquisitive and concerned for him. She was like that—sweet and caring. She was a wonderful girlfriend…
He wanted to gag. Girlfriend?
She was hardly his girlfriend. Not anymore. Ariel was much more his girlfriend than Lindy was. In truth—and probably in the eyes of God, Ariel was more than his girlfriend. No. No. No. He was being overly dramatic. What was wrong with him? Everything seemed to turn upside down whenever he heard from Lindy.
Maybe he shouldn’t open the letter. There was no law that required mail must be opened. He could simply set it aside for another day, if ever. He fingered the envelope and looked again at Lindy’s firm script. She wrote with such confidence, he thought. Like she knew exactly who she was and where she was going.
Oh, good Lord. What was with his mind that day? He was getting downright ridiculous.
Without thinking further, he ripped open the envelope.
Dear Reuben,
I know that you talked with Robert this morning. He said you weren’t coming home straight away. Perhaps Robert didn’t explain things properly…
Your mamm isn’t doing well. She’s asking for you to come home. Please come.
Is everything all right, Reuben? Is there something you’re not telling me?
In truth, this has nothing to do with you and me. Just please come home. See your mamm before it’s too late.
Lindy
Reuben dropped the letter to the floor and sank back into the cushions. So. Not so sweet this time. She was practically ordering him about, and it didn’t set well. He jumped up and paced the room. First Robert and now Lindy? Why didn’t they leave him alone? He knew his mother was sick. Of course, he knew his mother was sick.
But she’d been sick for a while now, and she was still there. He planned to go back and see her. Of course, he planned to go back and see her. He just couldn’t get away right now. He couldn’t afford to lose his job, could he? Surely, Robert and Lindy didn’t want him to lose his job.
Lindy didn’t even know he had a job. Unless Robert had told her. Had he? Had his brother ratted him out?
No. Robert wouldn’t do that.
Maybe he should talk to his supervisor and see when he could have a few days off. He could go back to Indiana, see his mother for a day, and then return. That should be fairly easy. He dreaded talking with his supervisor, though. She was hard as nails, that one. Her face reminded Rueben of a bulldog he once knew. Jacob Smith’s dog. That varmint used to chase him and Robert down the road faster than any racing buggy. One time, they’d nearly got caught, too, and Reuben had been sure he’d end up missing a chunk of his leg.
He chuckled and then grew sober. He couldn’t put it off any longer. He exhaled loudly. He’d ask his supervisor on his next shift—if she was there.
He found himself wishing she wouldn’t be.
* * *
“Tell me the truth,” Rachel moaned. “He hates me now, doesn’t he?”
Lindy rolled her eyes. “I’m sure he doesn’t,” she said. “And we hardly discuss his feelings toward you.”
Rachel plopped down on Lindy’s bed. “I really made a mess of it.”
“You shouldn’t have said it.”
Lindy’s eyes snapped fire. “Don’t you think I know that? I was angry. The words just came out. I didn’t mean them.”
“Just tell Robert that.”
“I tried to! Over and over before I left. He didn’t look like he believed me.” She grabbed Lindy’s arm. “Do you think he believed me?”
“Honestly, Rachel. How am I to know? Despite your beliefs, Robert and I don’t sit around for hours and talk about such things.”
Rachel sucked in her bottom lip. “I know. I know you don’t.”
“The only thing you can do is be extra nice, I suppose.”
“You’ll say nice things about me?’
“Ach, Rachel. I can’t fix this for you.”
“Robert likes you better.”
Lindy gaped at her. “What in the world are you talking about? Why would you say such a thing?”
“I see the way he looks at you.”
Lindy shifted on the mattress. “He’s grateful to me. That’s all.”
“If that’s all, it’s plenty.”
Lindy sighed. She was tired of thinking about Robert and Rachel. Tired of thinking about Reuben. She was worried about Berta, and that’s where her energy should be going. She glanced at her wind-up clock. “It’s late, Rachel. Let’s go to sleep. I have to be up early.”
Rachel scowled and stood. “Fine. Maybe I’m worried about nothing. Robert wants to go riding wi
th me later this week.”
“See?” Lindy said. “There you are. Everything’s fine. Now, I need to go to bed.”
Rachel moved to the doorway and stood there. “And Reuben?”
“Still in Ohio.”
“I know that. But will he be coming soon?”
Lindy swallowed past the lump in her throat. “Of course, he will. He’s worried about his mamm, like the rest of us are.”
Rachel nodded and left. Lindy turned toward her bedroom window. Why had she lied? She had nothing to prove to Rachel. She should have just told her the truth… Nee, he’s not coming. He doesn’t care a fig about his mamm. She’s dying, and he’s staying away…
She shuddered. She didn’t tell Rachel the truth because she didn’t want to face it. It made Reuben sound heartless and uncaring.
And Lindy was deeply afraid that was true.
Chapter Ten
“Lindy?” Robert approached her in the kitchen.
“Ach, gut morning, Robert.”
“I didn’t mean to startle you.”
“You didn’t. I’m fine. How are you this morning?”
“All right. Mamm was restless last night. Don’t be surprised if she sleeps a lot today.”
Lindy sucked in her breath. “Was she in pain?”
“I know she was, but she never says so.”
“Couldn’t you get her to take some medicine?”
“Nee. I made her tea out of the herbs Old Mae left, but it didn’t seem to do much gut.”
“I’m sorry.”
He blew out his breath. “I’m going to Ohio today.”
“What?”
“I’m going to talk with Reuben. Bring him home.”
Lindy’s eyes went wide. “Does Berta know?”
He shook his head. “I don’t want to tell her. In case, you know… Well, in case, it doesn’t work out.”
“You mean in case Reuben won’t come,” Lindy said, her heart sinking. Of all the people in the world, Robert knew Reuben best. If he had doubts that Reuben would come, then… She shivered, not wanting to think about it.
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