And Master Douglas. Ugh. Another cruel man. Are all men like that? Arthor seems different, but he could just be acting selfless to gain recognition. But somehow I know that he’s not that type; he seems genuine. Nicholas seems genuine, too. A warm feeling spreads across my chest when I think about him and how he kissed me in the closet. I touch my lips. There’s something so fragile about us; I’m almost afraid to think about it, worried it will slip away. Does he sense that fear in me? Or maybe he recognizes it, and carries that same fear inside.
There’s a knock, and when the door unlocks from the outside, I stand up and crack it open.
Nicholas stands outside in the hallway.
“Hi.” Even at the eve of the final phase of Savage Run, my body responds involuntarily by turning into a thousand electrified butterflies.
“I wanted to see if you were all right.” His eyes grow dark and there’s a storm of passion beyond the deep calm.
“I’m fine.”
“And I also wanted to inform you that just short of five million Newkos have been donated in your name.”
“Uh…Wow! I hadn’t expected that!” More leverage on President Volkov.
He smiles a little. “Well then.” For several seconds his blue eyes are on mine, and he just stands there without saying a word.
It has become awkwardly silent so I just blurt out the first thing I think of. “Why did you kiss me?” What a stupid question.
He gets a puzzled look on his face, but says nothing.
I open the door a little more, turn around, and walk into the room, hoping he’ll follow. I hear the click of the lock and my heart leaps into my throat. “I mean…” I swivel round and our eyes meet across the divide.
He presses his perfectly arched lips together for a moment before saying, “Don’t go tomorrow.” In his voice, I hear a man who’s as afraid as I am of losing what little we have together, that little something that is so much more than anything else I’ve had before with anyone.
“Why are you asking me to stay when we already decided that I’m going?”
“I’m worried about you—out there. And I do what I can to protect those I care about.” He steps forward and takes my hand, pulling me in so my chest touches his.
I look down, but he puts his hand underneath my chin, raising my eyes to his. I have stopped breathing completely and nothing and everything makes sense at the same time. I can’t think at all when he is so near and for whatever reason, right now, I’d give him whatever he asked for. My mouth parts as we stand in this moment that has stopped the world.
“You don’t have to go,” he says. “I can take you to the Konders.”
I step away so I can think clearly, bracing my chest. “Haven’t you been listening to me? I have to get Gemma!”
“You don’t owe her anything.”
I swivel around, and suddenly my pulse rises. “I owe her everything!” Never mind. You wouldn’t understand.” I move into the shadows of a wall, deeper and farther away. “Why are you trying to talk me out of this?”
“Because I’m afraid, okay?” His hand hits his temple and his voice cracks.
For an instant I’m stunned into silence. “President Volkov’s son—afraid?”
“I can’t stop worrying about you, that you’ll…before I can get to know you and before I’ve had the chance to tell you…”
I stare at him in silence.
“Heidi, I can’t explain it, but when I’m around you, everything makes sense.” He strokes my arm.
I feel it too. It’s like I’m able to do things I couldn’t before, be braver, stronger, more. But something holds me back from saying it and instead, I say, “I…I don’t know what you mean.” My words taste like ashes in my mouth.
The muscles in his shoulders and arms tense beneath his Savage Run shirt. He groans.
“What?” I say as ignorantly as I can. I’m a horrible person, but in the short time we have left I can hardly get him to understand that I just can’t trust any man. I can’t allow myself to be vulnerable.
“If you can’t even be honest about how you feel, what’s left of life to live?”
“It would never work and if you were smart, you’d see that, too.” Not only have I told him he’s stupid, I’ve managed to tell him we’re no good for each other. Both of which are lies and I hate myself right now.
“Is that the kind of crap you tell yourself?” His eyes gleam with anger.
“It’s not crap, it’s…” I pull further back, farther into the shadows until a cold wall presses against my back.
The muscles in his jaw tense. “Do you want me to leave?”
“No.” The word just tumbles out.
“Then what do you want?” He pinches the bridge of his nose.
“I just…I don’t know,” I want to get away, want to be out of this uncomfortable situation, but my body won’t budge like I’m commanding it to. Instead, I find myself taking his hand and drawing him close, pressing my lips to his. I just want to be safe. And being with him makes me feel safe. Nicholas cradles my head in his hands, his mouth moving across mine and when I feel their wetness, I open my lips and a moan escapes. “I’m no good for you.”
“Let me be the judge of that.” His mouth meets mine again and he kisses me with so much tenderness, my fear seems to melt away. His kiss grows passionate and when our tongues meet, wet flesh against wet flesh, I gasp and my senses become lost in the moment. His hands find their way to my back, underneath my shirt, and his palms are hungry and warm and strong. Strong arms that are gentle and kind, not harsh and cruel.
He kisses me deeply one more time and then he reaches around my shoulders, cocooning me in his arms.
“I’m so tired of trying to be strong all the time. And I’m scared. But I can’t give up until Gemma’s safe.” A weight drops from off my shoulders when I’m finally able to speak it.
“You already are strong. And I’m scared, too. I’ll do everything I can to help you get Gemma.” He kisses me on top of my head. “There are many things I don’t know, but the one thing I do know, is that when I’m around you, I feel like I’ve finally come home.”
I look up into his eyes and kiss him briefly.
He smiles. “I should go. I just didn’t want you to go out there tomorrow not knowing that I care.”
I watch him leave my room, and this time, I slip into a deep sleep almost right away.
Part 3
The Choice
Chapter 24
Early next morning, I dress in my last Savage Run Uniform: a red tight-fitted suit with black stitching and a yellow saber-toothed tiger’s head on the front and my name written on the back. Now that the news is out, at least I don’t have to squeeze my breasts flat.
When I get outside the Nissen hut, Timothy, Arthor and Danny stand in a triangle, while Johnny stands by himself, his legs wide apart, his arms crossed in front of his chest. Nicholas and Mai stand to the side and are talking quietly. I inch close to them to see if I can hear some of their conversation since they don’t seem to notice that I have come out.
Mai whispers, “Why did she have to leave? When she was there, I knew where I had her; she was safe.”
When she was there? Who is ‘she’ and where is ‘where?’ I knew where I had her? Who are they talking about? Me?
“You of all people—” Nicholas says, “—should know that freedom is more important than being safe.”
I move my head discreetly in their direction, but then Nicholas notices me. “Heidi. Good morning.”
Mai turns away from me and walks directly over to Arthor. I’m not quite sure what to say. Does Mai know me from somewhere? No, she couldn’t be talking about me. It doesn’t make sense. I mean, it’s not like I’m her daughter or anything—she wouldn’t keep that from me, would she? I look at Mai, but she has her back to me so I can’t see her expression.
“Listen up, everyone,” Nicholas says, and the others gather around. Mai’s gaze is down. I focus on what Nicholas says ins
tead. “This is the phase where you’ll be in the volcano lands, where you’ll crawl through the Caves of Choice, and where you’ll be braving Savage Jungle—all in the O-Region.”
The thought of creeping through the caves makes it difficult to breathe. When I was five, my father locked me in the chest that he keeps next to the couch. I overslept and he wanted to teach me a lesson so he kept me in there for an entire day without food and water. Since then, whenever I’m in an unusually tight space, I start to hyperventilate.
No one speaks as we make our way down the hill toward the entrance where our transporter waits. We’re all probably thinking about Johnny and how we’ll manage to stay away from him and not get killed. We get in the transporter and head toward Volkov Airport. On our way, I see a half dozen drones following us. I wish I could get rid of them somehow. I try not to look at Johnny, but it’s difficult to avoid his prying eyes. I look at Mai, but her eyes are down.
Five gray cargo aircrafts wait on the runway. The remaining participants are at the airport, as are their representatives. A drone is hovering around ‘Cory the Great,’ as he’s been dubbed by the news. The transporter stops about a dozen feet away from the aircraft I’m assigned to, and just as I’m about to get out, Mai takes my hand. I sit back down.
“Before you go, Heidi, I wanted to let you know how proud I am of you. I think you’re an inspiration to young women everywhere and I am honored to have been your representative. You will make it, okay? Just never give up.”
“I won’t.”
“Everything is and always has been as it should be.” She wraps her arms around me and we hold each other for a long time. Even when I try to let go, she continues to hold on. Her embrace feels like Ruth’s, filling me up with whatever it is that I’ve been missing. I want to ask her about what she said to Nicholas, but I can’t get the words out. And besides, if she says she knows me from somewhere, we don’t have time to talk about it now. Maybe I’ll bring it up after I finish the last phase.
“I’ll see you on the other side,” I say.
Her dark brown eyes look at me with gentleness. “Be braver and stronger than ever.”
It sounds like what Ruth said. I hope I can be.
I step inside the aircraft—it’s a cargo plane with seats on the sides—and immediately a Unifer tells me to go all the way to the end and take the very last seat. Passing the other participants, I see Johnny sitting in the first seat. The right side of his lip is bruised and I can’t help but feel pleased that I was able to cause him some pain. But when he smiles at me like he’s planning my demise, the pleasant feeling vanishes. I push past him like I don’t have a care in the world and make my way to the back, looking for Arthor. But he isn’t here. I see Cory’s white hair in the second to last seat. I gulp. He’s intimidating. And President Volkov’s pet. But it’s not like I can pick and choose where to sit. Besides, perhaps I can get some tips from him.
“Trying to steal my fame?” Cory says as I sit down. But then he laughs and leans over. “I hope you do well, Heidi,” he whispers. “It would show the pompous President Volkov that he’s wrong about women. And wrong about you.”
His comments surprise me. “Thanks.” I buckle my seatbelt, and note how his thighs are about the width of my waist.
“What you and Arthor have done for each other throughout these past few days is amazing. I wish I could have been so lucky to have the kind of friendship you have.”
“Yeah, he’s pretty amazing,” I say.
“As are you.”
I wait for him to say ‘for a girl,’ but he doesn’t. “Congrats on your recognition. President Volkov seems to really…look up to you.” I try not to sound disgusted.
He leans over again and whispers, “It’s nothing more than an illusion to promote President Volkov’s cause. I know he’s using me, but what he doesn’t know is that I’m using him.”
“Oh?” I look around to make sure no one is listening in on our conversation.
“He thinks he’s so generous to offer us lowly Laborers and Advisors our freedom, but what he doesn’t know is that one day, when we’re strong enough, numerous enough, we’ll rise up against him and bring equality back to Newland.”
I’m shocked by his words. Maybe I have misjudged him completely. “Well, when you’re ready to begin that fight—”
He laughs, his ice blue eyes dancing. “Let’s just get through this next phase and then we’ll talk.”
The trip to the O-Region takes just a little over an hour. Cory tells me that when he completes the Savage Run, he plans to marry his fiancé, June—a Master. The reason he wanted to complete the Savage Run is because June’s family won’t let them marry unless Cory becomes a Master.
Approaching the O-Region, I wish I could look out a window, but there are none.
“Everyone up!” the Unifer says. “Reach underneath your seats and get your parachutes. You have one minute to put it on.”
“Looks like we’re skydiving,” Cory says.
I unbuckle my belt, jump out of my seat and lift it up. Underneath, crammed into the seat, is a parachute. My hands are already shaking so violently that I struggle to pull it out. I watch as Cory puts his parachute on and then I strap my parachute around my hips and shoulders and lock the belt, securing it properly just like he did.
“Goggles,” the Unifer says, handing them out as he passes us.
“Have you done this before?” I ask Cory.
“Oh, yeah, about twenty times. It’s a rush!” He smiles and the goggles make him look goofy. “You?”
“No, but I’m sure it will be a blast,” I say sarcastically. My fingers are cold and sweaty, and it makes it difficult to adjust the goggles in place. A few seconds later, the back of the aircraft opens, and a hurricane of a wind whirls through the fuselage. A god-awful smell that reminds me of rotten eggs streams through the cabin.
Cory inhales deeply. “Ah, the smell of volcano.”
I wrinkle my nose and grab hold of my seat to steady myself as the plane bumps forward.
“Now would be a good time to locate the ripcord on the parachute,” the Unifer says. “After you’ve jumped, count to ten, and then pull it forcefully to release the chute. At the end of round three, there are eight cages. Only the eight fastest contenders get a cage and will be racing for the top three spots! So get your butts down there—ASAP!”
I grit my teeth. One of those spots is mine.
“The first one across the finish line is the ultimate savage! Good luck!” He lines us up and when he passes me, he gives me a strange look. Is it because I’m a girl? Or is it something else? I stand behind Cory and he’s clenching his fists, exhaling sharply, and pumping his fists, like he’s revving himself up to go.
Another Unifer at the rear end of the plane starts yelling for us to jump, shoving one participant out every ten seconds. The line is moving fast, and I’m not ready to jump. What if the parachute doesn’t open? It will open. But what if the one I have is rigged not to open? No, I’m just freaking out and need to calm down. Everything will be okay; President Volkov agreed to let me continue and I’m sure if my chute doesn’t open, the benefactors will suspect foul play.
Three participants stand ahead of me. A few seconds later, two. Cory jumps. I stand at the edge, seeing the yellow and red parachutes open beneath me, the lava-filled island moving by slowly. The wind tosses my hair and fills my ears with a loud hissing sound. I sway forward, the turbulence and wind pushing me back, making it difficult to advance.
“This is the end of the line for you!” the Unifer shouts.
Before I’m able to make sense of what he says, he shoves me out of the plane, and I plummet toward the ocean below.
Chapter 25
My first instinct is to knot together in an infant pose, my arms and legs drawn close to my torso. But this only causes me to roll. Instead, I slowly reach my arms and legs out, and as the wind pushes against my limbs, the spinning decreases until I’m being steadily drawn toward the earth’s
crust. As my hands reach for the ripcord, it feels like they’re moving in an ocean of molasses, the wind is so strong. Searching frantically, I finally locate the drawstring and grab hold. I slowly count to five—I gather I’ve already lost five seconds—and then pull the cord.
Nothing happens.
I pull it again, thinking I might not have yanked it hard enough. Still, nothing happens. Jerking it over and over, the Unifer’s last words replay in my mind. “This is the end of the line for you.” They must have done something to my parachute so it won’t open!
“Pull the ripcord, Heidi!” Cory yells.
Passing him with frightening speed, I see him sailing downward with his open parachute. “It won’t open!”
“Pull harder!”
Looking down, I estimate that at this speed it will only be a matter of seconds before I collide with the black lava rocks below. They rigged it! is all I can think. President Volkov won. I lost. I failed Gemma. I failed Nicholas. I failed myself.
All of a sudden, someone rams into me from behind and hooks his arms and legs around my body. I look back and see Cory. “You’re crazy!” I scream as we spin out of control.
“I know!” He smiles like he really is, but he feeds off of this kind of insanity. “Hold on!”
He helps me turn around and I lock my arms around his thick shoulders, my legs around his firm hips. The ground is so close and I can see the green grass and smell the scent of it mixed with the sulfur. We’ll die together, and he doesn’t seem to care one bit. He really is insane!
Cory pulls his ripcord, causing the second shoot to open, slowing our plunge. “Brace for the fall!”
Just before we hit the earth, I extend my legs and let go of Cory’s neck. We crash into the ground—not so fast that I think I can break anything, but hard enough that my knees and ankles throb from the impact. Before we’ve recovered, the parachute catches a breeze, dragging us with it a few yards. Cory pulls a handle and the parachute detaches, setting us free.
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