“You underestimate her. If she’s pissed enough, she’ll attack. And leaving after I told her I was staying home just might be the thing that pops her bubble.” I pulled him toward the bedroom door. We had to get back.
“Well, it’s about time her bubble was burst. I don’t like how she treats you. You deserve so much better.” He grabbed me and his eyes captured mine. “Slow down. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it.” His arms wrapped tightly around my body and his lips pressed firmly onto the top of my head. I melted into his embrace. I believed him.
“Grab that jacket. It’s cold and I don’t want you to catch a chill.” I snatched the puffy jacket I’d worn earlier and hung it over my shoulders. It smelled so good, just like him. I’d have no problem keeping warm in his jacket. He pushed my arms through the sleeves and zipped it up to my neck. He grabbed my hand and pulled me downstairs to the great room.
His whole family was there, except for Calvin. Max swung his hand in the air and gave a firm wave.
“Well, I have to take Wilson home. I’ll be back late.” His mom scurried over to us and held out her arms. I let go of Max and hugged her.
“Oh Wilson, it was such a delight meeting you. Come back tomorrow, you and Maxi. We’ll have a nice brunch.” She let go of me, I wasn’t ready. I held her tight against me a moment longer. Her embrace was something I’ve longed for my entire life. I felt her arms wrap back around me. Finally I got to feel what a mother’s embrace could be like. The smell of sweet peas and the weight of a sun-soaked hot day saturated my body.
“Okay, I would love that. And thank you for opening your home to me,” I answered back instantly.
“Mom, we’re leaving tomorrow,” Max told her.
As I let go of her, a flood of vacancy washed across my soul. I didn’t want to forget how she felt.
“Well, you’ll just have to find time to come back.” She looked at Max and pulled at the back of my hair, lifting it off my neck. “You have the prettiest hair.” She focused back to me.
I wanted to pack her in my suitcase. I’d found what had been missing my whole life.
“Thanks,” I whispered to her.
“Frank, Camille. Max and Wilson are leaving, come say goodbye.” She swung her hand in a ‘come here’ motion.
“Don’t worry. It’s okay; they’re deep in their game.” I waved at them. They were playing pool and I didn’t want to pull them away from it. Frank and Dan waved and said something I couldn’t hear. Camille came over and gave me a light hug.
“I don’t know where Max has been hiding you, but it was nice he brought you here.”
“Nice to meet you,” I exhaled. She winked at Max and popped him in the chest with her fist before she went back to the pool table.
“Okay honey, drive safe, it’s dark and icy out there. I’m not going to wait up. I’m pretty tuckered out.” Nancy gave Max a kiss on the cheek and pulled at the collar of his hoodie.
“That’s fine, mom. Thanks.” He kissed her back.
I loved him. I really wanted what they had. The way she fussed over him and he let her.
He pushed his arm around me and led me to the entry where we’d left our boots. I held him and slipped my feet into my fake UGGS. Not too bad, only lost my balance once.
“We’d better hustle,” he whispered in my ear. He opened the front door and the stinging-cold air rushed against my face and hands. I really was leaving and I truly didn’t know if I was going to make it back tomorrow. He grabbed my hand and pulled me to the car.
He drove fast through the cold, dark, icy roads. It was a good thing all I could focus on was him. He stole glances on the straightaways.
“So I’ve been thinking about how you can explain to Cindy why you weren’t there.” Max turned down the radio, which was playing some bass-heavy song about love and drugs.
“Good, because she’s probably really pissed off right now. I’m surprised she hasn’t called me yet.” I pulled my phone from my pocket and checked.
Cindy wasn’t one to text or call me a lot. She was usually busy with other people. Which—don’t get me wrong—I didn’t mind. I wasn’t one who liked to talk on the phone much. I’d rather talk to people face to face anyway.
“I think we should tell her the truth,” he said. I felt my gut tie in knots.
“You’re joking, right? Or you’ve lost your mind. We can’t tell her.” I pushed my hands through my hair and rubbed my eyes. Something I do when people come up with totally insane ideas.
“Wait, now hear me out. What if…by telling her about us, we are giving her the power to prove herself trustworthy. You know, kinda like creating responsibility and ownership to something she has access to. Does that make sense?” He pushed his hand in the air between us, glancing over when he could to field my reaction. I sat silent for a moment before I answered.
“I think if we did something like that, you would be in jail and I would be lying on a psychiatrist’s chair explaining, in detail, what you did to me and why I let you.”
I was as calm as I could be. The fierce fire storm raged hard and chaotically in my body. There was not an ice cube’s chance in hell she could keep us quiet. She is all about personal and private PR. I remember the time our friend Tracy told her about kissing some random guy behind the bleachers at a football game and, by half-time, everyone knew about it. She is the last person you would want to tell anything to.
His jaw tightened and I waited for him to argue his point. But instead he exhaled slowly, tilting his head to the side.
“I wish we could be open with her, I really do. But I think—no, I know—she would warp it into something bad or wrong and use it to her own twisted advantage. And to be honest, I don’t think I could handle that.” I was glad I told him my feelings about Cindy. Hopefully he’ll see my logic. If not, God help us.
“It doesn’t feel wrong to me. You aren’t wrong for me. What is a month from now? You and I will still be the same people. But it’s all about the numbers and that’s what matters to the law. You’re right, we can’t tell her.” He slid his hand across my thigh after he shifted. “I don’t know what I was thinking.” He twisted an awkward smile.
“How nice it would be to not have to hide. If it was a normal situation, we could go anywhere and do anything without a second thought. But it’s not that way. So right now, we have to take what we can get and protect what we have.” I stared at his profile. His eyebrows lowered and his jaw clenched.
“So what are you going to tell her? About not being there when she came home, and the fact that you are here, with me, in my car.” He stopped driving. I turned away and looked out the window. We were at the gate to Cindy’s cabin.
“I don’t know.” Knots of dread tangled around my confidence.
Max pulled out his phone and texted Calvin. His thumbs bounced and clicked the keys quickly.
“I told Calvin we were here.” He laid his phone on his thigh. I watched, waiting for it to chime and vibrate. It was forever before it responded. He grabbed it and read it to me.
“Come down. Nick pressing button. Cindy not here yet,” his voice lightened.
“Oh, thank God; Cindy must have hooked up with someone from the club,” I breathed. The huge block of stress that weighed heavy on my shoulders dissolved to nothing. The gate swung open and Max drove the car through. We were so lucky Cindy wasn’t there yet. We dodged another bullet. He drove through the pitch black night down the long driveway to the Browler’s mansion. The beams of our headlights bounced and danced off the snow around us as we turned and twisted through the acres and acres of front yard. I was able to breathe deeply and the muscles in my neck released a wave of pressure across my back.
We could actually walk up to the front door together, hand in hand, to say goodnight. Not that I wanted to do that, but it was reassuring that it was a possibility.
He came around to my door and opened it. I grabbed his hand and slid out of his car. He, like every time before, wrapped his arm around my waist
and pulled me against his hip—a comfort I was getting used to, something I was going to miss back at school. He pulled me up the steps to the front door of Casa de Browler and stopped me from going in.
“I want to kiss you good night.” He pulled me close. My heart fell to my feet.
“No, I don’t want you to go,” I mumbled. I balled my fists and tapped them against his chest as he held me. When I stared into his eyes, they danced for me. He had a twinkle that told me he was teasing and a smile that roped me in.
“I want to know what it feels like to kiss you goodnight on the front porch,” he said as he leaned into me and pressed gently against my lips. It was as good as I could have imagined it. I twisted my fingers around the hair on the back of his neck and pushed up onto my tiptoes. He slid his hands up, pressing them below my ears and cradling my face. He tilted his head to one side and opened his mouth.
“Mmmm, feels good,” I breathed. My entire body was smiling. I tasted the excitement of our first porch kiss and the disappointment of it being our last.
There is no porch at the dorms and, when I graduate, who knows where I’ll be for college. But I could almost bet that not one of the colleges would have a huge, beautiful porch like the Browlers’. My heart pushed for him, but at the same time, was broken by the thoughts of our Monday morning existence together at Wesley. I tried my best not to think about it. I pushed myself against his chest and wedged my head under his chin. His arms pressed heavily across my back. I felt the muscles in his body tighten around me. I never wanted to let go.
He loosened his arms from around me. Suddenly, his head snapped up and he reached for the door. Instantly he had me through the entry and was pulling me toward the stairs.
“What are you doing?” I stumbled over my boots. Max tossed Calvin the keys to the car.
“I’m not here,” Max told him.
“Okay, bro,” Calvin played cool.
“There’s a car coming down the drive. Might be Cindy,” Max told me as he pulled me upstairs.
My heart leapt high into my chest. Selfishly, part of me wanted it to be her; that way Max would have to lock himself in my room and wouldn’t be able to leave until she was asleep. Or better yet, he’d have to stay all night. At the very least, I would be guaranteed one last night alone with him. We hurried into my bedroom and pushed the door shut, pressing the lock. I grabbed the chair from the desk and propped it tightly under the knob. I’ll admit, it might have been a little overkill, but there was no way I was going to let anyone interrupt my last night alone with Max, especially Cindy.
“Wow, you’re serious,” he said after I double-checked the force pressuring the chair against the door. His fingers ran across the top of the chair and down the spiral dowel, finally reaching my hand. “Do you really think Cindy’s gonna bust in here?”
“I’m not taking any chances. Tomorrow we fly back to California, and that’s a reality I’m not ready to deal with,” I said. He pulled my hand and pressed it against his chest.
“Wilson, you’ll be fine. We will do what we have to until we don’t have to anymore.” His heart pounded an excited rhythm against my skin. My feet shuffled forward to him as he led me gently to the middle of the room.
“I don’t know Max, I can’t stop thinking about tomorrow. I don’t want to go back right now. I’m not ready to let this go.” I pushed my hand between us. I felt my eyes well up with anticipated disappointment. My tears tasted desperate.
I visualized us in his classroom. He totally ignored me, wouldn’t even look my way. He helped Bonnie Wente with her questions and his hand pressed against her back. His smile warmed his eyes as he spoke to her. Painful thoughts tarnished my visions of him touching her. Irrational thoughts, desperate wishes, and heartbreaking nightmares took over any normalcy I had. The door wedged closed with the chair was the only thing I thought could keep him here with me, away from tomorrow.
“Wilson, please don’t cry. I’ll keep tomorrow away as long as I can. I promise.” He cradled my head in his hands and pressed his lips to taste my tears. His fingers pressed solidly against the back of my neck as his thumbs cleared what his kisses had missed.
“I’m sorry. Stupid isn’t it? Crying for something I haven’t even lost.” I grabbed the waist of his sweatshirt, clinging to any hope that he would agree to stay forever with me in Aspen. Was it crazy? Yes, but it’s the only thing I could rationalize in the moment of pure lunacy.
“Not stupid, I wouldn’t call it that—meaningful, significant, even emotional—but not stupid. Far from that.” His eyes studied the expression from my lips to my eyes as he spoke. He pulled me close, his lips warmed my forehead. His sweet aroma flooded my body, finding its way to my heart. He held me standing in the middle of the room.
“I swear, throughout my entire life, I’ve never cried as much as I have this weekend.” I looked up at him, my head still weighed against his chest.
“Is that a bad thing?” He smiled down at me. His hand stroked my hair away from my eyes.
“No. It’s a safe thing, a trust thing.” I rose to touch his lips to mine; they tasted as sweet as they smelled.
“Wilson, I won’t hurt you,” he whispered across my lips.
“I know,” I answered. His arms tightened across my back. His words were my aphrodisiac, carrying endorphins throughout every part of my body.
I trusted him. It was strange to have such an unfamiliar feeling. I’ve never trusted anyone like this. With him it was instantaneous. I don’t think I could have experienced him the way I did this weekend if I didn’t trust him. Completely unprotected, open, and raw; it was sometimes painful to face, but he made it okay to own who I was and where I came from.
I elevated my hands up around his neck and kissed him, allowing him to taste my desire for him to take me. He pulled his mouth from mine. Cool, empty air blended with my skin as he took off his shirt, then mine. We both hurried to unbutton each other’s pants. I knew what he looked like in tight boxers and welcomed that view again. We shuffled and kicked to be free of the tangled pants at our feet. I felt his weight press me toward the bed as the back of my legs hit the edge, and my body tilted to fall. He crawled up slowly and deliberately, heavy against my body. I felt his desire through his Calvin Klein’s. His body swayed as his mouth climbed to breathe in my ear.
“Wilson,” he inhaled. “It’s a good thing I’m not seventeen.” He pushed his hands heavily into the bed above my shoulders, raising his chest off mine. Pressure filled the low space between our bodies. “Because I don’t think I could wait to be with you if I was.” He pressed his hips against me again.
I lost my breath. I felt the same way. I thought about being alone with him like this. Nobody would know. I could be with him and share that part of me that ached to have him take me, completely. I dug my fingertips into his lower back; he bit his bottom lip and studied my expression. His lust-filled eyes danced purposefully and slowly before he dropped his head. His hair fell toward me. His breath paced fast as he moaned. His motion snared my butterflies in his net. He owned them and they were ready to go, willingly.
I let out a deep, instinctual growl as the space between our bodies vanished in rhythm. My mind swimming in his pool of confidence, I was his entirely. He brought me to teeter on a razor-thin edge of anticipation and ecstasy. The only thing separating us was the thin, snug fabric of his Calvin Klein’s and my panties. My mind raced with the thoughts of his weight heavy against my body on my eighteenth birthday with nothing between us but my own inhibitions about my virginity.
My soul found its mate, causing us both to shudder and twitch in pleasure. He pushed his mouth hard against mine. His arms circled my shoulders as his muscles tightened around my body; he laughed as I raked my hands down his back. Ticklish, he adjusted to lie next to me. My body rippled with chills as the cool air danced on my uncovered skin. Max noticed and pulled a blanket over us from the foot of the bed.
“Thanks,” I breathed.
“You’re welcome,�
�� he answered as he pressed his forehead to my cheek, his nose dragging across before his lips tasted my face.
A wave of fatigue splashed fast through my body and my eyelids became victims of the weight. His face pushed against the side of my head, his breathing slowed and became deep.
“Max? Are you sleeping?” I asked, fighting to stay awake. His arm had become heavy across my waist.
“Hmm? No,” he mumbled as his breath quivered into a yawn.
“You have a nice family,” I mentioned to him.
“Mm, hum,” he breathed. He tightened the space between us and pulled his arm across my stomach.
“I’m serious. You don’t know how lucky you are to have such a nice family.” I pushed against him.
“Wilson, what you saw was what they wanted you to see.” He rolled over onto his back. The soft sheets tugged at my side. He tucked his hands behind his head and stared up at the ceiling.
“Well, Max, I think your mother is amazing and I loved her.” I rolled over. My arms draped his chest and my hands held my chin firmly as I looked at him. “And your sister was sweet.”
“Don’t think that my family hasn’t had its own sets of problems. I had a lot of pressure from my father to follow him into the family business. When he found out I had different ideas for my life, watch out.” He glanced at me before looking back up at the ceiling. The muscles in his jaw flexed.
I‘d hit a nerve. What was it with me and putting my foot in it? Great, I was so wrapped up in my own pathetic life story I didn’t give him a chance to tell me his. How frickin’ selfish. This whole weekend it never crossed my mind that, even with two parents, his relationship with them might not be perfect. He sat up and leaned against the head board. His chest rose with each deep breath.
“I’m sorry, Max. I just assumed—that wasn’t fair of me.” I sat up next to him and pushed my fingers through his hair, wedging his thick black locks behind his ear.
“You didn’t know. My dad always thought I was the golden boy. See, I was the one that was supposed to work my way up through his company then eventually take over for him when he retired. And, of course, I didn’t do it.” His shoulders rounded.
The Wilson Mooney Box Set Page 20