He had hoped he would not have to get involved in any major event in her life.
Hiran sat back and watched Calla’s face as his story sank in for her. There, it was out now: his entire dark past, from his origins to the present. If she chose to continue standing by him he would be surprised. She looked up at him, reaching one slender hand through the bars to stroke his cheek. She didn’t hate him, he could see it in her eyes. But what did she feel, really feel? He hoped her answer wouldn’t be just to make him happy.
“It is your decision Calla,” he said, “whether to forgive me or not.”
XXVIII
Calla
Calla just shook her head in disbelief, not at Hiran’s story but the fact that he had kept it hidden for so long. She leaned over to rest her forehead on the cold metal separating them. That was a lot for her to take in; perhaps that was partly why he kept his past to himself.
But that she wouldn’t understand if he told her…?
He’d had a rough life growing up, she could understand that now. In some ways he was more afraid of facing those memories again than he was of sharing his story with her; it was something that kept haunting him. Keeping to the shadows of society—to the shadows in general—was his only defense, the only way he could try to deal it.
“It is your decision whether to forgive me or not,” he had said. Forgive him? Forgive him for what? For being so ashamed about something he had no control over? There was nothing to forgive there—he needed reassurance more than forgiveness for that.
She would never have met him if he had passed through Kida instead of staying in the area. That he had chosen to watch out for her—it was almost touching; lately she thought someone might be watching over her, her own guardian angel keeping her safe, maybe—now she knew someone had been there.
“Hiran, why didn’t you tell me sooner?” she asked.
“If I had,” he replied, “what do you think would have happened?”
“Something other than this! We could’ve found another way to get past the stupid Council that didn’t lead to your landing in here. Hell, we could have even gone all the way to the far side of the mountain if we had to! Anything!”
“You do not know what would have happened,” Hiran said sadly. “Neither of us know. There is no point debating it now—all of this has passed, and nothing can be done to change it. I thought it was for the best that I kept my secrets to myself. And I was afraid, afraid that if I were to share the dark truth about myself to the one person whose trust I had earned, that trust would be shattered irreparably.” He let his eyes drop. “I did not want to do anything that could jeopardize the friendship I have built with you in these recent weeks.”
Calla cupped her hand under his chin, lifting his head so that he was looking at her again. “You could have told me,” she said. “That’s what I’m here for—what any real friend is there for.” She shook her head. “Whatever your lineage, it doesn’t matter to me. What does matter is what you choose to do—that is truly what makes someone who they are.”
He blinked. “Do you forgive me, Calla?”
“What is there for me to forgive? Your only fault is your difficulty in letting go of the past; you’re perfect otherwise.”
“Please?”
Calla sighed. “If it will make you happier…then yes, I forgive you.”
Hiran seemed to cheer up at this, and tried to hug her again through the bars. His fingers got caught in her hair, perhaps deliberately from how he promptly started playing with it again. “It does make me feel better,” he said, “now, at the end.”
For a moment Calla’s heart seemed to stop. The end…?
“Do not fear for me, Calla—it is far too late for any of that now. My fate is sealed.”
“What are you—”
“We have been watched—a guard has been standing around the corner listening to us for some time now. I have only just sensed his presence. I am afraid time has run out.”
“No, I can’t accept that!”
“It is too late Calla.”
“Like hell it is! You can’t just give up like this!”
“I no longer have any say over what is to happen in my life—they took that right away from me. The Council literally wants my head, and while your intentions were pure they have used you to get it.” He finally took his hand away from her face. “This is the end for me.”
“No. There has to be a way—s”
“I have already tried, my dear; that is why they reinforced my prison. There is no chance for me now. You are the one that must get out of here.”
“I won’t leave you!”
“You must! Calla…” He held her head with one hand. “If they find you here they will make you face some horrible punishment of your own, perhaps even torture. I could not bear the thought of the Council doing anything like that to you in any life.”
Some strange noise started echoing down through the door behind them from the hall. Both of them stopped to listen as it grew louder and louder—some kind of mob was heading in their direction, and they were getting closer.
“Get out of here Calla,” Hiran commanded, not unkindly.
Calla latched her hands onto the bars. “I’m not leaving you.”
“It is not worth arguing over. You must go.”
“But—”
“Please Calla.” He touched the tip of one finger to his lips and then touched it to hers. “For my sake go, so that my end can have some peace instead of overwhelming turmoil.”
Calla glanced at the stone arch leading to the next corridor. A faint red glow was spreading across the far wall, the voices of the group even louder now. Time was up.
“Go,” Hiran pleaded.
Calla had no choice—she didn’t want to, but she had to leave him.
She gathered her cloak about her as she fled back towards the passage she had come through. She stopped at the archway to risk one last look back at him. He wasn’t watching her, all of his attention directed towards the other passage, waiting for his doom to round the corner. There was nothing more she could do—she was powerless to help him this time.
Calla turned and ran back down the passage. She tripped over the uneven stones she couldn’t see and didn’t care about it; she just pulled herself back up and continued running. She crashed into the door leading to the stairs in the same manner. Throwing it open she took the steps two at a time and barged through the first door she came to, sinking to the floor and sobbing hard in the middle of the darkened hall.
“Gods,” she choked out to the silence, “why me? Why does all this have to be happening to me?”
Nothing had gone well for her since she left home. Her stepmother had deliberately tried to kill her, and claimed it was the right thing to do; Mai was dead, beheaded right in front of her; a lunatic king trying to take over the world was also after her, either to kill her as well or to keep her for himself; she had no idea what she was supposed to do to help this world now that she was here, since no one seemed willing to give her a straight answer; and now the friend she had developed some kind of feeling for was going to be killed for no real reason. The thought that she was going to lose Hiran kept ricocheting around her mind.
She had no idea of what she was supposed to do.
She heard footsteps coming towards her. She stood up and was about to duck back through the door when a hand clamped firmly around her upper arm; she tried to pull away but they held her tight and pulled back. Struggling to pry it off, Calla found herself facing the captain she had seen earlier talking to Mrok. He stared down at her hard, his face completely expressionless. “You!” he snapped. “What are you doing out here, girl?”
“Let me go!”
“Answer the question! What are you doing out here? Spying?”
“Get your hands off me!”
“You are not supposed to be down here.” He pulled her after him hard as he started down the corridor. “The Council has said you are not to go anywhere unattended. They
are tired of your constant disobedience.”
“And I said let…me…go!” With the final word Calla’s hand balled into a fist, and with every ounce of force she could muster she drove it into his face in a right hook. Taken by surprise the guard was sent flying away from her until he hit the wall, his head hitting the stone; he dropped unconscious to the ground. Calla just stared at him in shock—she didn’t think she’d hit him that hard…
She couldn’t linger here anymore. He had hit the wall quite hard, and someone was bound to have heard the noise of the impact. She had to go now, before anyone found out it had been her.
Calla took off running down the corridor. Right now she was somewhere on the first floor; she could tell from the massive wooden doors she ran by that led into the meeting hall. She knew that she could get out into the palace gardens through the kitchens, so she took the next left turn and the following right to get there. She didn’t stop in the doorway but ran straight through, holding her cloak close to her so it wouldn’t catch on anything. Reaching out, she grabbed hold of the door latch and pulled on it sharply. Taking a deep breath she charged out across the gardens. She knew the gate was on the far side; it opened to a path winding back up the mountain.
Calla ran as hard as she could, ignoring the protests of her muscles. She leapt over the wooden gate when she reached it rather than stopping to open it. She ignored the steepness of the trail beyond it and climbed it without letting her pace slow. She wouldn’t let herself stop.
Sunrise was a blush on the horizon when Calla finally stopped to rest. She collapsed next to a large rock to catch her breath, looking out across the plains that stretched out below. They were covered with a peaceful mist, one that hid the danger and woe that seemed to follow her wherever she went these days. It wasn’t fair—if she was supposed to help make everything right again, why were things around her going so wrong?
The crunching of gravel and bouncing of stones from behind her caught her attention. She turned around to see a familiar face.
—I had a feeling you would return. — Elenia said.
XXIX
Elenia
“You knew,” Calla snapped at her. “You knew the whole time that Hiran was in trouble yet you stood aside.”
Elenia could sense the bitterness, borderline rage, that flooded through the girl. Why were mortals so incapable of understanding? If she could have stepped in she would have done so a long time ago and none of this would have happened.
But where would these mortals be if she had?
—I had no choice.—she said to the girl.
Calla didn’t like this answer; it was clearly written across her face. “‘No choice?’ The way you say it, it sounds more like you didn’t want to be bothered. He needed you!”
—He needed you even more; he still does. Do you think that I want to stand by and watch this world collapse on itself? As much as I wish I could do more, I am bound by sacred law not to interfere.—
“And where does that leave the rest of us? We’re all being left to face a cursed future because neither you nor any of the idiots in control here are willing to do anything about it!”
—Careful, child!—Elenia warned. Calla was just venting the frustration built up from over the past few months, but it was bringing her dangerously close to facing Elenia’s wrath—something most mortals should not dare to do.
“You could have ended this!” Calla shouted. “This whole damned war you dragged me into could have ended long ago! Mai would not have died, Hiran would have had a normal life, and I would have been happier not knowing any of this existed! You did nothing!”
—ENOUGH!—Elenia roared out.
Calla jumped in shock, or more likely was thrown back, realizing too late that she had struck a nerve. The earth beneath them began to shake violently, threatening to break apart; it shook with such force that Calla was sent sprawling to the ground. The sky grew even darker in spite of the dawn. The wind howled around them, blowing so strongly the few trees here on the mountainside were bent almost in half, groaning under the strain.
When Elenia was mad about anything, the whole world felt her rage.
—YOU DARE TO CHALLENGE ME? YOU MAY HAVE BEEN GRANTED A GIFT UNLIKE ANY SEEN BEFORE IN THIS WORLD, BUT YOU ARE STILL A MORTAL! WHO ARE YOU TO DICTATE TO ME WHAT MY DUTIES SHOULD BE?! YOU UNDERSTAND NOTHING IF YOU TRY TO THINK YOURSELF ABOVE ME. YOU ARE A CHILD!—
No sooner had Elenia finished that she felt her rage subsiding. The earth felt it too—the wind died back, the ground stopped shaking, and the darkness yielded once more to the light of the coming morning. Calla stayed where she was on the ground, gasping for breath as the shock of what just happened slowly started to pass. Elenia could feel herself shaking. She hadn’t let loose like that in a long time, at least a few centuries. Back then this mountain had erupted, sending molten rock for miles in all directions. She could have caused the same catastrophic event again…
Hellfire, she thought. It wasn’t the girl’s fault entirely—everything happening in the world around them was starting to get to them all.
Calla was slowly starting to get back up. Elenia sighed as she watched her. As bold and out of line as her statement had been, the girl was still right: she had gone and dragged her here. The least she could do was give her at least a few answers, but not all; she wasn’t ready to share some of her secrets.
Maybe she should start by dropping the formalities now. It was pointless to maintain them.
“But you said yourself,” Elenia said, “that it is a person’s actions that make them who they are.”
Hearing actual words from her caught Calla by surprise; she stopped and looked at her with wide eyes. Elenia, in turn, sat down on a large boulder half-buried in the side of the mountain. She felt exhausted and old, more now than she ever had before. She motioned for Calla to come join her.
“I cannot deny the truth in your words,” she said as Calla crawled up. “I am afraid you are right—this world turning into a mess really is my fault.”
“No,” Calla said immediately. “I didn’t mean…I was just saying—“
“You spoke out from your heart, but you spoke true regardless: if it had not been for my strict adherence to the laws I follow, none of this need have happened.”
Calla sat down next to her as she continued to listen. Elenia smiled halfheartedly. “I see the confusion in your eyes, love. Yes, I will admit that I have made many mistakes in my life. But it would seem that this one is perhaps the biggest of them all.”
“What do you mean?”
Elenia hesitated; she was debating whether to go on with this. But she already had the girl’s attention, and she couldn’t just stop here. Calla couldn’t just accept a claim for her not taking direct action—she needed to understand the reason behind it. Damn it all, she had made every effort to ensure this girl knew to get here, the least she could do was to help her understand why.
She cleared her throat before she spoke again. “You have only heard the...mythical version of what happened to start this mess, some of it true, most of it lies. I do not doubt that the Council of the city below has chosen to alter the stories to fit their interests. The truth of it is, the sacred laws which I follow so strictly have led to it all.
“You may have heard something like this in versions of the tales from others, but I am not the only…higher power that exists. I presume that you have heard of Bralon, the chief deity in the Dead Lands?”
“He killed Hiran’s mother,” Calla replied immediately.
That one battle must have been the common element in all the versions of the stories she had heard. Elenia shook her head; the various retellings painted such a dark picture of everyone there. “It is not quite that simple,” she said. “This is where everything gets complicated, Calla. You see, he was not always the heartless, destructive creature he is now. His real name is Ronan—and he is my brother.” She watched Calla’s face for a reaction; the girl just gaped at her. “I made the mistake of
letting him go.”
Calla swallowed. “What?” she asked in a whisper.
Elenia stared down at her hands, rubbing her thumbs along the fingertips. “‘Lord of Death’ is a title many have given him in recent centuries, as a result of his now-destructive nature. In the earliest days Ronan was the Guardian of the Afterlife, guiding and caring for the spirits of the dead as they crossed over from the Realm of the Living. But after several centuries of this something changed in him: a restlessness developed in him, spreading slowly over the years until he decided he needed something different, some change. He placed some of his most trusted servants to perform his duties during his absence, and so left his hall to wander across the world.
“It was during his travels that he met a powerful demon—a creature born of Chaos itself and corrupted by Darkness, one that delighted in feeding on death and decay. We who were created to guard and protect this world have always known the necessity of eliminating such monsters whenever they cross to this plane of existence. But this creature was as old as us and far stronger than others we had met before—one of us alone could not last long against such a creature.” Elenia’s vision grew foggy and a single tear slid slowly down her cheek. “In the battle that followed Ronan was defeated, as strong and fierce a warrior as he was. The demon could not kill him—as we can never die—but he did not want to risk another encounter like that again, or one against someone stronger. He took possession of Ronan, rose as the dominant mind in his body, and became the monster god Bralon that we know now.”
Calla’s light green eyes were wide. “Why didn’t you go after him?” she asked. “Why didn’t you try to save him?”
Elenia took a deep breath. “Because I did not know how. I wanted to save my brother, but the only way I could destroy the monster meant I would raise my hand against him too. Our sacred law states that none of us can harm each other or those we guard, else all of creation would crumble. I have spent all these years trying to find some way that I can bring Ronan back, but every year of searching has led to another year of Bralon growing stronger.” She sniffed, more tears falling into her lap, but forced herself to maintain at least some composure. “So you see,” she continued, “this disaster is happening because I want to try bringing my family back together.”
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