Were Charles and Annette flirting? Was Lady Iris matchmaking between their servants? This really was all getting a bit too familiar.
‘That will be all, Charles,’ he said, hoping his voice conveyed that he for one was not going to condone this level of informality.
‘Very good, my lord. I’ll be back presently with the lady’s maid’s tea.’
‘Or perhaps Annette would like to take it in the servants’ quarters,’ Lady Iris said. ‘You can come back when you’ve finished, Annette. I’m sure you won’t be long, and Charles can leave the door open so there will be no impropriety.’
Was Lady Iris in collusion with her mother? Were they both trying to get him in a compromising position? Theo knew he should put up an objection. Even if the door was open, even if the maid was only gone for a brief moment, there was still the danger that he would again find himself in a position to be blackmailed.
But he remained mute as the maid and Charles left the room together. What was wrong with him? Was he losing his sense of self-preservation?
‘Don’t worry,’ she said with another small laugh. ‘I know my mother threatened you so you would host this fête, but she’s not a vindictive woman. She wouldn’t make you do anything she thought you’d really object to.’
Was she serious? He would have objected strenuously to hosting this fête if he had been given an opportunity to do so.
‘Oh, don’t look so affronted,’ she said. ‘You know you enjoyed yourself today. And isn’t holding a fête so much better than having to marry me?’
‘I... Well... I...’ Theo didn’t know what to say. She was right, he didn’t want to marry her, but that didn’t mean that being married to her was an abhorrent fate that all men would want to avoid. It was just one that he wanted to avoid, and not just to her, but to any woman.
‘Don’t worry. I’m just teasing you,’ she said. ‘But Mother would never have forced you to marry me. Can you imagine my lovely mother making anyone do anything they don’t want to?’
‘She made me host this fête,’ he stated bluntly, finally finding his voice.
‘Yes, and you had an enjoyable afternoon, didn’t you? Go on, admit it.’
Theo huffed out a loud breath.
‘Go on, say it—you had fun. I know you did,’ she continued in that teasing voice.
‘Oh, all right. Yes. It wasn’t as dreadful as I had expected it to be.’
‘And?’
‘And, yes, all right—at times it was almost enjoyable.’
‘That wasn’t so hard to admit, now, was it?’
He was about to object to her teasing tone, but instead smiled. She was right. It wasn’t that hard to admit. ‘Well, a glass of Myrtle’s elderberry wine certainly took the edge off the day.’
‘One glass?’
He shrugged. ‘All right, several glasses. I must order a barrel or two for the wine cellar so I can cope with next year’s fête.’
What was he saying? He shouldn’t even be joking about this. He had no intention of hosting another fête. The elderberry wine must be having more of an effect on him than he’d first thought.
‘I’m sure the locals will be delighted if you do,’ she said. ‘They were all so happy to see you again. It was obvious how much you were missed.’
He huffed a dismissal. ‘I’m the local Earl—they could hardly behave in any other way, could they?’
She lowered her voice. ‘You don’t need to do that, you know.’
‘Do what?’
‘Push people away. Everyone was pleased to see you at both the fête and the dinner party. And you did enjoy yourself today so that proves that you don’t need to hide yourself away.’
‘I am perfectly aware of the fact that I do not need to hide away,’ he said, more loudly than he had intended. ‘I live this way out of choice. If you consider that to be hiding myself away, then so be it.’
‘But today you were so happy, you smiled and even laughed, whereas I don’t believe the way you usually live is really making you happy,’ she said, her voice still quiet and no longer teasing.
‘Nonsense.’
He expected her to put up a barrage of arguments to counter his claim, but she said nothing. She did not remind him, yet again, that he had enjoyed himself today. And about that she was surprisingly correct. Once the initial shock of having so many people on his grounds had worn off it was actually quite pleasant to meet the locals again. And despite himself, he had to admit, it had been heartening the way they had greeted him, as if with genuine affection.
‘All right, yes. I had a good time today, but that does not mean I wish to change the way I live my life. As I said, I’m perfectly happy the way I am.’
‘Hmm...’ was all she said in response.
He waited for her inevitable lecture, for her to argue that if he was so damn happy, then why was he always so bad-tempered? He even thought she might insult him by saying that hiding away was the behaviour of a coward. But after that small, murmured hmm, she kept uncharacteristically quiet.
‘All right,’ he said again, in answer to her unasked questions. ‘Perhaps it doesn’t necessarily make me happy. But it is the way I choose to live my life and that is an end to it.’
She said nothing. He tapped his hand repeatedly against the arm of his chair, his irritation growing with every second she remained silent. He knew she was still present, could hear her soft breathing, could still smell her enticing scent, so why didn’t she speak? After all, chattering incessantly was something she was so good at. Why didn’t she start blathering on about the weather, or start cooing over Maxie-Waxie, or say something, anything, other than criticising the way he lived his life?
‘All right,’ he repeated, to fill the annoying silence. ‘So, you think I’ve acted like a coward, do you? Buried myself away because I can’t face the world? Retreated in defeat?’
‘I don’t think you’re a coward,’ she said quietly. ‘After what you did no one would ever consider you a coward.’
He huffed out his annoyance. ‘I’m not talking about the fire. That night I merely did what any man would do. I’m talking about how I’ve lived since then.’
‘So am I,’ she responded. ‘Your world as you knew it was destroyed that night. You did what you did to protect yourself. That’s not cowardly...that’s survival.’
What on earth was she blabbering on about? Protect myself? From what? From whom? From the world? From those people at the fête who acted as if overjoyed to see me again? From Estelle? Nonsense. None of those people frightened him. Nothing frightened him.
He gripped the sides of the armchair, his irritation continuing to grow. Or did she think he was protecting himself from her? From the potential pain of her rejection? From the pain of being rejected again? That too was nonsense. He did not want her or any other woman and he did not appreciate this line of questioning.
‘You were hurt,’ she said. ‘It’s natural to want to hide away while you heal.’
Would she never stop with this absurd balderdash? He wanted to shout at her in a most ungentlemanly manner. It was time to nip this in the bud, to let her know that she had no right to talk to him like this—after all, she meant nothing to him.
‘Need I point out, Lady Iris, that you are overstepping what is considered appropriate behaviour from a young lady when in the company of a gentleman?’ he said through clenched teeth. ‘Twice you’ve come into my house uninvited, and the last time you did so it was to reprimand me for an impropriety which I hadn’t committed. Now you feel you’re within your rights to question the way I live my life.’
This elicited a hearty laugh from Lady Iris, one much louder than would normally be acceptable in polite society, and certainly not the reaction he expected.
‘And need I point out to you, my lord, that said gentleman has perhaps lost the right to point out to said lady w
hat she should or should not do or say? Not when he’s kissed that young lady and has actually had his hand up her blouse.’
Theo froze in his chair. How could she talk about what had happened between them in such an open, teasing manner? Most women would be too contrite to even mention it, never mind joke about it. He could only hope no one was listening at the doorway.
‘And I suppose you believe that intimacy we shared gives you the right to comment on the way I live,’ he said in a lowered voice.
The tantalising sound of silk caught his attention as she moved in her chair. He tried hard not to be distracted by it and to focus on her annoying words.
‘It’s one thing to hide away when you first need to heal—that’s only natural—but you don’t need to do that any more. You should get out into the world. You should socialise with other people. You had been happy before and you can be happy again, but that isn’t going to happen if you hide yourself away.’
‘Next you’re going to be suggesting that I should marry, have a family, become part of the community.’
‘Would that be so bad?’ she said softly.
Theo was silent for a moment, unable to formulate all the reasons why that was indeed so bad. It had once been what he wanted but not now. And if little miss Lady Iris had thoughts in that direction then they needed to be quashed immediately.
‘Yes, it would. I have no intention of marrying anyone, ever. And I would appreciate it if you would keep your opinions to yourself. Yes, we shared a brief intimacy, but that gives you no more right to question the way I live my life than I have the right to question the way you live yours.’
‘You’re right,’ she said softly. Theo knew he was being cruel and for that he felt bad, but he could not abide having her suggesting that he should make changes just because she didn’t approve of his solitary existence.
‘It is none of my business,’ she said, her voice no longer teasing. ‘I suppose I’m a bit like my mother. We just want everyone to be happy.’
He scoffed his disagreement. ‘And, like your mother, you want to interfere in people’s lives.’
‘Yes, I suppose we do,’ she said, not sounding as if she had just been insulted. ‘But only when we think it’s for the best.’
The only response he could give to that was another humph.
‘And we do want what’s best for you,’ she continued, her voice taking on a soft, soothing quality, as if she were talking to a child. But he was not a child and he would not be spoken to in this manner.
‘Blackmail, forcing me to open up my home to all and sundry, forcing me to attend dinner parties where I have to endure...when I have made it clear that I don’t want to go. If that’s what you and your mother consider helping someone, I’d hate to see how you behave when you’ve got a vendetta against some poor man.’
‘Yes, the dinner was perhaps a mistake, but an unintended one.’
The memory of Estelle’s laughter and her flirtatious voice crashed unbidden into his mind. A mistake. That dinner had been more than a mistake—it had been a disaster, as had every encounter he had had since this overly joyful, overly meddlesome Lady Iris had entered his life. A woman who thought every problem could be solved by laughing and making a joke about it. Well, she could not solve the world’s problems just by making people laugh. She could not change his life just by tricking him into attending a dinner party and hosting a fête.
‘I know it’s not my place to give an opinion,’ Lady Iris continued, shuffling in her seat.
‘Well, it not being your place hasn’t stopped you before.’ He sat back in his chair in preparation for her latest ludicrous pronouncement.
‘I know Lady Redcliffe hurt you,’ she continued. ‘But you don’t need to continue to punish yourself for the way she treated you. None of it was your fault and you deserve to be happy and to live a full life.’
His chest tightening, his breath caught in his throat. ‘You’re right,’ he gritted out through clenched teeth. ‘It is not your place to give an opinion, and I’d appreciate it if in future you would keep them to yourself.’
‘I just...’
‘Yes, you just,’ he hissed. ‘You just want to make everything better, make everyone happy, make the world a place full of sunshine and joy.’ He cut her off before she could impart any more of her unwanted advice or misguided opinions.
‘No, I just...’
‘Now that you have finished telling me how I should live my life and how I should be feeling, I think you should go and join that coven of women who have invaded the blue drawing room.’
Before she could speak again, he grabbed the bell and rang it hard and long.
‘You rang, my lord,’ Charles said, presumably an ironic comment as his master was still shaking the bell vigorously.
‘Yes, Charles,’ he said, placing the bell back on the table with a decisive clunk. ‘Lady Iris is leaving now. Please show her to the blue drawing room, as it is past time that she, her mother and that organising committee departed.’
‘Very good, my lord.’
Max’s tail started thumping as Lady Iris patted him on the head and said goodbye. Although that was a pleasantry she reserved for the dog alone. When the door shut behind her, Max emitted a little whimper.
‘Oh, don’t you start,’ he said to his dog. ‘You were content enough before she came along. You don’t need her in your life, so just get over it.’
Max settled down at his feet but continued with his sad whimpering.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Iris had no regrets over what she had said to Theo Crighton. No, that wasn’t entirely true. She did regret ruining the companionship they had shared throughout the day. And she regretted that he had pushed her away. But still, if she could take back time she would still have said everything that she had said to him. Someone needed to.
It broke her heart that he was wasting his life, locked up in his castle. He was a good man and he deserved to have a good life, to be loved and to be in love. It wasn’t going to be her he loved—that was becoming increasingly obvious—but he did deserve to meet someone and that wasn’t going to happen if he never left his home, and never let anyone close to him. Nor was it going to happen if he continued to cling to his love for Lady Redcliffe. It made her seethe every time she thought of that woman. Not because the Earl loved her—well, not just because the Earl loved her—but because she did not deserve his love, not after the way she had treated him.
She entered the blue room and her mother looked in her direction, her face expectant. Iris gave a small shake of her head and her mother shrugged and went back to discussing whether they should have a skittles competition at next year’s fête and whether donkey or pony rides for the children should be included.
Iris sat quietly in the corner while the animated discussion continued and was soon joined by her smiling lady’s maid. Annette appeared to have had more success in her romantic pursuits than Iris had, although, as they would soon be returning to London, Annette also was about to experience disappointment.
When the discussion finally came to an end, with no resolutions to the various contentious issues, only an agreement to meet again for further talks, the women gathered themselves up to leave.
They all headed off down the hallway to say goodbye to the Earl, still arguing about donkeys versus ponies. Iris’s mother suggested that Iris join them. When she declined her mother sent her a questioning look.
‘I’ve already said goodbye. It would look a little odd if I went back in and said goodbye again,’ she explained to her unconvinced mother, but she followed on behind and waited outside the door, while the other women gushed over the Earl, telling him how grateful they were, what a success the day had been, and hinting that it should happen again next year.
The terse replies from the Earl suggested his bad humour had not improved, but the ladies were undaunted and t
heir spirits were just as high when they left his drawing room and fluttered off towards their waiting carriages.
‘A very satisfying day, all round,’ Lady Walberton said as she, Iris and her mother climbed into their carriage for the return journey.
‘It was an excellent idea to host the fête at the Earl of Greystone’s home,’ Lady Walberton continued. ‘And he did seem to be enjoying himself today.’ She smiled at Iris. ‘And I believe we have you to thank for that. I think the Earl is quite taken with you.’
Iris forced herself to smile back.
‘Hopefully, that means he’s put his past behind him and is now ready to re-enter Society, and maybe we’ll be having a wedding in the county soon.’
Iris continued to smile, even though her jaw was now starting to hurt, while the satisfied Lady Walberton’s smile beamed out, encompassing both Iris and her mother.
When they reached the house, Iris’s mother took her arm and with great haste rushed her up the stairs to her bedroom. The fête wasn’t the only thing that needed to be discussed, picked over and analysed. Her mother wanted to know everything that had happened between her and the Earl when they had been alone together in the drawing room, everything that had been said, and every gesture he had made.
Iris tried to repeat everything that had happened, what she had said, what the Earl had said, and in what tone. ‘I’m afraid I undid any good will between us that had been built up during the fête, and now it’s a rather hopeless cause,’ Iris said when she’d finally relayed the entire conversation to her mother.
‘Not necessarily,’ her mother replied, her lips pursed in concentrated thought.
Iris had to admire her mother’s optimism, even if it was a bit misplaced. But then, she hadn’t been the one to be ejected from the Earl’s drawing room.
‘He kissed you and he was thoroughly enjoying your company today,’ her mother said. ‘We just need to contrive some more ways to put the two of you together so he can see how much in love with you he really is.’
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