As they talked, Sam slipped money into the large pocket of Ruthie’s apron.
“You don’t have to, Sam,” Ruthie whispered.
“For Norma and her children. It’ll get them a fresh start.”
“I’ll see to it,” Ruthie said.
Sarah was surprised by the exchange, but acted as if she hadn’t noticed it. She thought Sam didn’t even like Norma, yet he’d helped her and her children, and done so in a way the woman would never know about.
When Sam stood and mumbled something about needing to get on with the plan, Ruthie touched Sarah’s hand. “It will be grand having you stay with me for a few days. I have my duties here, but we’ll have lots of time for long talks. And don’t worry about Sam. It’s always hard for him to say good-bye, even when he knows he’ll be back in a matter of days. You’ll see him again before you know it.”
Sarah looked around for Sam as Ruthie’s words sank in. He’d been gone more than a few minutes.
She glanced over to where Ruthie had set the supply bag. It was gone. He was gone.
“I’d love to stay, but I can’t.” Sarah almost knocked the chair over in her haste. “I have to go with Sam.” Dread drifted through her thoughts. What if she missed him? “Excuse me.”
She was at a full run when she reached the garden door they’d entered an hour before. Her carpetbag sat just inside on a table. He’d left it for her. He’d left her.
Sarah grabbed her belongings and opened the door.
Sam had one foot in the buggy.
“What are you doing?” She grabbed his shirt. “You were going to leave without even saying good-bye.”
“I told you I have something I have to do. I’ll be back in a few days. There is no sense putting off what I have to do. You’ll be safe here.”
“You weren’t going to say good-bye.”
He turned around and faced her. “How could I look in your eyes and say good-bye to you, Sarah, without holding you? I don’t think they allow that kind of thing in the mission. At least not in the way I want to hold you. I thought it was better if I just kind of slipped away.”
Sarah tossed her bag into the buggy. “Well, you don’t have to worry about being proper with your farewells, because I’m going with you.”
“You are not.”
She climbed into the buggy. “This is where I belong, next to you.” She crossed her arms and leaned back, staring straight ahead. “You even made me promise to sleep next to you every night.”
Sam figured it was a losing battle, but he tried logic. “It may be rough, Sarah. There may even be trouble.”
She looked at him. “Then we have no time to waste. You’d better teach me to shoot before dark.”
The mission door opened and Ruthie stepped out. She looked at first her brother and then Sarah already in the buggy.
Sarah tried to smile. “Thank you for the offer to stay, but I’m needed here with Sam. He can’t go without me.”
Ruthie nodded and winked at her big brother. “It’s about time he needed someone. I’ll see you both again.”
Sam swung into the buggy. “One of these days, wife, I’m going to win an argument with you.” Part of him wanted to pick Sarah up and toss her back where she’d be safe. He hated the idea that she might be in danger. But he couldn’t call her a liar. He did need her.
TWENTY-THREE
VALUABLE TIME TICKED AWAY, AND THERE WAS NOTHING Sam could do about it. Since he’d had word that Reed and his men were camped near Fort Worth, he’d wanted to finish the trouble between them once and for all. Ranger Dalton rode out after they’d had coffee before dawn. He was now three hours ahead of Sam. Jacob planned to check things out, then backtrack to meet up with Sam. But Sam couldn’t even seem to get on the road.
First, Norma had to be taken to the mission, then his sister always thought they had to talk. Now Sarah insisted on going with him, and of course, shopping had to happen before they could leave town. At this rate he’d be an old man before he ever caught another outlaw. He was beginning to believe there was a reason why he’d never known a bounty hunter to marry.
The only good thing about the direction they were riding was that once Sam settled things with Reed, they would be near his place. Sam wanted to take Sarah home. It was the one thing he had to offer her. A place she could call her own. He wasn’t sure she believed he was telling the truth when he talked about it, but she’d see the farm soon enough.
Glancing in her direction, he did have to admit Sarah was quite a sight riding beside him. While he’d found her a horse and gathered supplies, she’d insisted on switching into a pair of trousers and a shirt she picked up at the saddle shop. Both were far too big and of poor quality, but she hadn’t complained. Even the hat she bought looked like a hand-me-down. But the small leather moccasins he’d insisted she wear fit her feet like gloves. They laced to the knee so she would have extra protection against scrapes along the trail.
She’d told the truth when she said she could ride. He enjoyed watching her long gold braid bounce from side to side as they galloped out of town. In truth, he enjoyed watching every part of her swaying in the saddle. He might never use a buggy again.
“You handle a horse like a top hand, Mrs. Gatlin,” he offered when they finally slowed to allow the horses to walk.
“I used to take care of Granny Vee’s old nag. I’d ride whenever I had my chores done. I’ve always loved animals.” She glanced at him. “That’s probably what attracted me to you.”
“You like this over a buggy?” He couldn’t help but wonder if she had any idea of how much of an animal he was. She was so sure she could tame him, but Sam knew she had little chance.
“Oh, yes.” She leaned forward and patted the gray mare’s neck. “I can’t believe you found such a fine horse to rent.”
“I didn’t rent the animal. I bought her. If you want, she’s yours.”
Sarah looked at him in surprise. “Mine? Just mine?”
“If you want. I know you can’t fit her in that bag, but she’s yours just the same. I’ve got plenty of room in the barn on our place, and there’s a pasture with a creek that runs through it. I’d have to do some work on the fence, but it wouldn’t take me more than a few days.”
Sarah pulled her reins. Sam did the same.
“You mean she’s mine to ride.” Sarah pushed her hat back and looked at him.
“I mean she’s yours to keep, Sarah. If I’d have known you liked to ride, I’d have gotten you a mount earlier.”
“She’s mine to keep, forever?”
Sam was starting to feel as if he were talking to an echo.
“Forever.” He didn’t know what more to say, but he had to talk to her. He had to let her know where she stood, with him, the horse, with everything. “If you ride away from me one day, at least I’ll know you’re on a good horse.”
“Thank you for the horse.” She patted the animal once more. “But I’m not leaving you, Sam. I don’t know why you think I might. You’re my husband.”
He watched her, surprised she’d read him so clearly. The Ranger’s words haunted his thoughts. How had he put it exactly? “If Sarah isn’t already with child, Sheriff Riley might call the whole thing off.” She might say she wasn’t leaving, but Sam wondered how she would react if she knew it could be possible.
“To my way of thinking, when we married, we made a deal,” Sam said. “I’d bail you out and take care of you. That means a home for you to stay and that you’d never go hungry. In exchange, you’d be my wife. Cook my meals when I’m home, keep house, and share my bed when you’re ready.”
“It is a fair bargain. More than I could have hoped for.”
She didn’t say anything else, but Sam saw it in her eyes. She wanted more. The problem was he had no idea what the more could be.
“We’d better stop here and let me teach you how to use a gun,” he said, changing the subject. “If you’re going to ride with me, you’d better know a few things.”
Th
ey directed the horses into a wooded area half a mile from the road. Sam took his time showing her how his .45-caliber Colt worked. For Sam the weapon had been almost an extension of his hand for years. He found it hard to believe anyone would not know how to use a six-shooter.
At first he had been in a hurry to finish the lesson and ride on, but as they sat close, their heads together, looking at how to load the weapon, Sam decided he didn’t care if it took days.
When she was ready to pull the trigger, Sam propped a branch up with rocks about thirty feet away and stood behind her. The weapon looked huge in her hands as she raised it and fired.
She jumped and almost dropped the gun.
Sam laughed. When she tried again, he was prepared. He made her stand on a rock so that she was almost as tall as him, then he braced her, circling his arms around her, talking low in her ear.
When she fired again, she rocked against him.
For almost an hour she aimed at the branch and fired. Each time he patiently went over his instructions once more, touching her gently as he talked, loving the way she leaned into him as she grew tired. Fascinated by how she took his slight caresses as though they were as natural as breathing. At sundown the branch still stood, but neither of them seemed to care.
They camped beneath the live oaks and feasted on food Ruthie had packed in an old flour sack. There were times when silence stretched between them, but neither seemed to mind. The air grew cold as the sounds of the night whispered around them.
Sam built up the fire, wondering if Jacob would see it from the road when he backtracked looking for them. They were on the same road, they’d catch up with each other eventually, and he hoped they’d do so before either of them found Reed. The outlaw was wanted in three states. He wouldn’t hesitate to kill if he felt trapped.
Sam knew there were others besides Reed out there looking to put a bullet in him, but Reed irritated him more than most. Some men became outlaws out of anger, or looking for a fast way to make money during hard times. But Reed was just mean to the core. Everyone he touched suffered.
When Sam spread his bedroll by the fire, he wasn’t surprised Sarah put hers a few inches away. The need to make love to her had long ago become an ache deep inside him, sweet and torturing at the same time. Wanting her made him know he was still alive, still a man. In the past few years he’d closed down until he sometimes thought of himself as no more human than the Colt he wore. Everyone, but Sarah, looked at him the same way, but to her, he was a man ... her man.
He wanted to ask her again if she’d decided that now might be a good time to start a real marriage. Their days together could be running out. He thought of promising her it would be nothing like what she had before. But Sam had finally found one skill he wasn’t sure of. What if she felt nothing when they made love? What if he were as poor a lover as she was a shot? He tried to comfort himself by thinking the few women he’d been with had not complained. But that logic offered little peace when he knew they were being paid by the hour.
He smiled. Sarah seemed to enjoy his touch at dawn, and he’d never forget the way she kissed him before they left the hotel room. Still the question nagged at him. Maybe the trick was making her want him. He tried to relax on the bedroll. It wouldn’t be an easy job when all he could think about was wanting her. He wished he had the right words to say, but he had always thought of words as a waste of time between a man and a woman.
As she did every night, Sarah untied her long braid and combed her hair out. Then she unlaced her moccasins and set them beside his boots. She slipped beneath the covers only inches from him.
He waited, thinking he should have told her she was pretty before it got too dark to see. He thought about complimenting her on something, but all he could think of was her shooting. If he said anything good about that, she’d know he was a liar.
“Sam,” she broke the silence. “You think you could kiss me good night, if it’s not too much trouble?”
He rolled to his side and spread his hand out on her middle. Gently he touched her, fighting a desire to grab her and bury her beneath him. He concentrated on the rivets on her pants that were bumping against his fingers. The denim trousers Levi Strauss had made for men were rough to his touch, but Sam knew the softness that lay just beneath. She’d pulled the cinch straps tight in the back, but they were still too big in the waist for her.
Sam leaned close and smelled her hair. “Someday, when the time is right, how would you feel if you had a child inside of you? My child.”
She didn’t answer. The intake of her breath allowed him to easily tug her shirt free from the waistband. He slipped his cool fingers beneath her shirt.
He lost himself in the way her body moved as she breathed. “I wouldn’t mind having another child,” she finally whispered. “Someday.”
He leaned and kissed her mouth so lightly, he heard her sigh.
“Do you mind, Sarah, if I touch you while I kiss you good night?” Her body was already telling him the answer he wanted to hear.
“You won’t go beyond a touch, Sam? You swear?”
“I swear.” He lowered his mouth to cover hers as his fingers tugged the first rivet free on her trousers.
For a while he kissed her as though he planned to do so all evening. Each time they both learned more about pleasing the other. He tasted the inside of her mouth and enjoyed the way she shuddered with pleasure. One at a time he freed the buttons of her shirt until it parted to her waist, but he didn’t push the material to reveal her flesh.
His hand slid down to find hers and he brought her fingers to his shirt, letting her do the same to him as he’d done to her. She was nervous, fumbling with the buttons, but he didn’t care. When she finished, she slid her hands over his chest.
“I like the feel of you without bandages covering you,” she whispered.
“I like the feel of you with nothing but my hand covering you,” he answered and felt her laughter against his throat.
Suddenly he sat up and pulled her with him. He crossed his legs and lifted her into his lap, her legs spread on either side of his waist. His hands gripped her thighs and shifted her until she was as close to him as their clothes would allow.
“Sam!” She tried to pull away.
“It’s all right,” he whispered. “I’m not going to hurt you or break my word.”
Her head gave a nervous nod. She trusted him enough to continue into the unknown.
One hand held her tightly in place as the other cupped the back of her head and drew her mouth to his. He kissed her fully, holding nothing back, releasing her only long enough to shove the cotton of their shirts aside. Her soft breasts brushed his chest, taking his breath away with pleasure.
At first she jerked, not knowing what was happening to her senses, then suddenly she met his passion with her own. The knowledge shook Sam. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him. Her arms circled his neck and held tightly as she trembled.
He gently kissed her throat, brushing away her hair as he moved down. She melted to his touch, leaning back until the firelight danced off her bare flesh. He wanted to see her, but the need to feel her heart against his with nothing in-between was too great. He pulled her back against him.
Her arms rested lightly on his shoulders as she let him move her as he pleased. Slowly she relaxed, trusting him as she drifted with the feelings, newborn and raw with need.
When he placed her back on the bedroll, she stretched and smiled as his hand moved from her throat to her trousers. Watching her, he unfastened another hold on the pants, then another.
Her hand covered his. “No, Sam,” she whispered. “Leave them on.”
“All right, love,” he answered against her ear. “As long as I can touch you.”
He moved down to boldly claim one of her breasts with his mouth, and she began to sway in a dance as old as time. Her hand rode atop his fingers as he slid beneath her waistband to the warmth below.
She cried out as he touched
her lightly at first, then bolder.
He kissed her mouth tenderly. “Tell me to stop, Sarah. Push me away.”
His hand touched the very soul of her.
“No,” she answered, out of breath.
He kissed her then, deeply. Moving his tongue in gentle strokes as he moved his fingers.
She broke the kiss, needing to breathe, wanting to tell him how he made her feel, but all that would come were sighs of pleasure and sounds of pure joy.
His mouth crossed back to her breast, and unbelievably the passion doubled.
Suddenly lightning struck her very center, and she felt her body tighten.
Sam pulled her against his side and held her then as she drifted slowly back to earth. He didn’t touch her, or even kiss her. He just held her, letting her body tremble against his, he took the shock of her passion the same way he took her reaction when she’d fired the gun.
When Sarah could finally talk, she realized he’d pulled her clothes back together and was very still beside her. One hand rested on her, the other circled into her hair.
“I never knew anything like that,” she whispered. “Sam you’ll never believe what happened to me.”
He didn’t answer and she realized she’d been so wrapped up in the feelings washing over her that she hadn’t given a thought to him.
“Oh, Sam.” She stretched and kissed his jaw. “Did you know that would happen?”
He pushed a strand of hair from her cheek. “I thought it might.”
“Would you do that again sometime, please?”
She felt laughter rumble in his chest. “I’ll think about it.”
She placed her hand over his heart and rested her head on his shoulder. “Good night, Sam.” His name was almost lost in her yawn.
“Good night, Sarah.”
He listened to the soft sound of her sleeping as he stared up into the night. He’d made her happy. If he could do it with a touch, he could do it when they made love. Slowly he was getting to know her, getting to understand what she wanted and how she liked to be touched. The only problem was if he had to court his wife much longer he would go insane with need for her.
Jodi Thomas Page 21