Nick falls briefly silent, and then asks, “Are you safe there?”
I look at him sharply. “What are you asking?”
He levels me with a look. “You know what I’m asking.”
“Do you really think I’d willingly stay with someone who knocks me around?”
“Depends on if you had anywhere else to go.”
I toss the grass knot aside. “It’s not like that, Nick.”
“Do you have any other family?”
I’m growing tired of his questions, and I decide to start asking some of my own. “No, you?”
“No. It’s just me and my old man.”
We need to talk about something else, because we are touching upon topics that neither of us are very comfortable with. “How do you not have a girlfriend?” I ask with genuine curiosity.
Nick laughs under his breath. “Where did that come from?”
“Well, you’re pretty nice to look at. How come I never see any girls flirting with you at school?”
“I’ve always been a bit of a loner at heart and not much of a socializer. I may not have a girlfriend, but that doesn’t mean the girls aren’t around. I just don’t mess with the ones at school.”
This is getting interesting, and I position myself so that I am facing him. “What kind of girls do you mess with?”
He studies the water and says, “The kind that aren’t looking for anything.”
“Where do you meet them?”
“Parties. I used to do some stupid shit, but I’ve calmed down a lot this past year. Girls aren’t a high priority these days,” he says lightly.
“Yet you seem to be putting in a lot of effort with me,” I tease.
His head turns and he looks at me. “I’m not trying to get into your pants. Big difference between fuck buddies and friends.”
“You may not be trying, but I know you want to,” I say, unable to help myself.
“I’d be blind if I didn’t.”
“But yet you won’t,” I say with puzzlement.
Nick’s quiet, and he doesn’t respond to my comment.
“Is it because of Blake?”
“Partly,” he says truthfully.
Why does what I do with Blake matter? I frown and try to read his expression in the moonlight. “Blake and I aren’t serious,” I tell him.
“Maybe I don’t want to be like the others.”
“You just told me that you like girls that expect nothing in return. I’m that kind of girl,” I point out.
“I know,” he says softly.
“And that’s a problem?”
“With you, yes.”
“You’re talking in riddles, Nick,” I grumble with frustration.
“Then there’s no point in continuing the conversation,” he says simply.
I stare at him, completely exasperated as I try to understand how his mind works. “So if I wasn’t sleeping with Blake, things would be different between us?” I ask, refusing to let the topic rest.
Nick reaches up and scrubs his hands over his face. “Maybe,” he says reluctantly.
“So what you’re saying is you want an exclusive fuck buddy,” I say slowly.
“Just let it go, Fallon.”
“No,” I say stubbornly. “So if it weren’t for Blake, we’d be screwing?”
His shoulders tense, and he draws his legs up, sitting Indian style as he rests his elbows on his knees. He stares out at the water. “No.”
“No?” I echo with confusion.
“No,” he says firmly.
“What the fuck, Nick? You just said that things would be different right now if I wasn’t with Blake.”
His head turns and he looks at me. “That doesn’t mean we’d be screwing.”
“You are making no sense to me.”
“That’s because everything comes down to sex with you. You refuse to look beyond it.”
Now I scowl. “What are you talking about?”
“Fallon, this conversation is going in circles. Let’s just end it,” he says with a hint of exasperation.
“But I’m not ready to end it,” I argue.
“Well, I am.”
“Ugh! You drive me nuts sometimes,” I exclaim.
“Just imagine what you do to me,” he says dryly.
“Ha-ha.”
“Any problems at school today?” he asks, switching the subject.
I shake my head.
“Then Blake took care of Camilla?”
“As far as I know.”
“What about the guys? They a problem?” he asks, watching me closely.
“Nah, I can handle them.”
Thirteen
I look down at the scrap of material that Blake has just handed me. “What is this?”
He stands before me, and a wide grin stretches across his lips. “A bikini.”
My eyes narrow on him suspiciously. “Camilla’s?”
“No,” he laughs. “I bought it for you so we could go swimming.”
Swimming? “It’s barely seventy today,” I protest.
“The pool is heated, and there’s a hot tub out on the deck.”
It’s Wednesday evening, and I am standing in Blake’s bedroom. We’ve just arrived, and as soon as we’d stepped into his room, he’d tossed me the bikini. I scrutinize it as I hold it up. It’s a red halter with low-rise bottoms. I look at him inquiringly. “How did you know my size?”
A hint of red creeps over Blake’s face. “You’re about the same size as Camilla.”
His discomfort amuses me. “Where should I change? In your bathroom?” I ask, glancing at the connecting door that is located next to his closet.
This earns me a lascivious look. “Right where you are is just fine by me.”
“You have to work for it today,” I tease. I’m on my period, but there’s plenty I can do to him that doesn’t involve actual sex.
“Trust me, I’ll earn it,” he replies with a confident smile. He walks to the bed and picks up the swimming trunks he’d tossed on it a moment ago. “I’ll meet you down by the pool.”
After he leaves, I quickly strip down and slip on the bikini. It fits perfectly. When I’m ready, I make my way downstairs and walk through the house to the back deck. Blake is already there, placing towels on the loungers beside the pool.
I begin walking over, but Blake takes one look at me and launches himself in my direction, tackling me into the deep end. The water is a complete shock to my system as it closes in over my head, and I automatically start struggling to swim upwards. Blake had released me so that he could surface, but I can’t seem to go anywhere. My arms and legs flail, my hair tangling around my face as I begin to panic.
Blake’s arm slips around my waist, and I am effortlessly pulled to the surface. I begin to cough, and Blake supports me as I cling to him, his legs brushing mine as he keeps us afloat. “Easy. I’m just going to take us over to the side of the pool,” Blake murmurs calmly. With his help, we reach the edge, and I quickly grasp onto it. I cough one more time, and now that I have something solid and stable to hold onto, my panic begins to fade.
“You can’t swim?” Blake asks grimly.
My eyes shift to his, and I see his face is white. I shake my head.
His face falls, and he looks upset. “Why didn’t you say something?”
“When? I never had the chance,” I remind.
“Shit. I’m sorry, Fallon.”
“It’s okay, I’m fine.”
The color is coming back to his face, and he gives me a firm look. “Looks like the first thing on our agenda is teaching you how to swim.”
I arch an eyebrow, wanting to lighten the mood. “Oh, we have an agenda for this evening, do we?”
He grins, the earlier tension fading. “Yes. Swimming lesson first, and then a mean game of water basketball. After that, I’m hoping for some fun in the hot tub,” he says as he wiggles his eyebrows playfully.
I can’t help but laugh. “Confident much?”
He moves closer to me
, his hand brushing my waist beneath the water before sliding down my hip. “I’m very confident in my abilities when it comes to seduction,” he murmurs.
His head lowers to mine, and he kisses me. We’re both nearly naked, and I can’t resist reaching a hand out and running my fingers along his hard chest as his tongue teases mine. I could spend hours kissing Blake and never tire of the feel of his lips against mine or the taste of him in my mouth.
Blake finally, and very reluctantly, pulls back. “Okay, time to get down to business. I want to play with you, not drown you,” he says, turning serious.
For the next hour, he teaches me floating techniques. Eventually, I can manage to keep my head above the water, but only for a minute or so. When he’s satisfied I’ve learned enough for the day, we play a game of water basketball in the shallow end of the pool. Blake and I tackle each other, and I laugh and shriek more than I ever have in my entire life as we fight for the ball. I can’t believe how happy he makes me feel. I’ve never been like this with anyone, and Blake brings out the kid in me—the one that never had a chance to play.
It’s not long after the basketball game that we end up in the hot tub. Instead of making a move on me, Blake sits against the side, relaxing as he gazes at me.
The hot water feels good, and I’m perfectly aware of the grin that’s been permanently etched on my lips since we’d started our game of basketball earlier.
Blake smiles. “You look pretty happy.”
“I am.”
“I like it when you smile.”
“I seem to do that a lot when I’m around you.” He looks pleased, and I move closer to him. “You’ve shown me a good time this evening. I think you deserve a reward,” I murmur.
Blake’s eyes turn hooded. “Do I now?”
“Mmhmm.” I kneel between his legs and run my hands over his toned chest. The bubbling water swirls around my shoulders, and I give Blake my best sultry smile as I flick my nail over his right nipple.
“I should go grab a condom. I didn’t think to earlier,” Blake says with a groan.
“No need, it’s a bad time of the month for me, but that doesn’t mean we still can’t have some fun.”
“Whatever you want.”
“I definitely want,” I say firmly.
I tilt my head, bringing my lips up to his as I kiss him. He immediately opens, and my tongue sweeps into his mouth, taking control of the situation. Blake’s arms wrap around me, and he tugs at the back of my bikini top until it loosens and floats around my chest. I smile against his lips, because someone is most definitely ready to enjoy his reward.
Blake breaks the kiss and pulls back. He shifts and presses his hand against the center of my chest, urging me to lean back into the water. I decide to let him have his fun, and I recline back, causing my breasts to lift out of the water slightly. He tosses aside my bikini top and slips an arm beneath my back so that he can support my weight. The bubbling water feels sensuous along my nipples, and Blake immediately lowers his head, taking one of the tips into his mouth. He strokes it with his tongue, and I tighten my fists in his blond hair. As he skillfully toys with the bud, I moan as my hips rub against his hardness beneath his swimming trunks. My breasts have always been sensitive, and I love having them played with. Blake’s fingers begin to roll my left nipple, and I’m gasping with how good he’s making me feel.
I enjoy the sweet torture a little longer until I shift in his arms. “Enough,” I murmur. I press my lips to his, pushing my breasts against his chest so that his hands fall away. My lips devour his hungrily as my hands travel down to his waist, and I start pushing at his swimming trunks.
“Let me,” Blake says against my mouth.
I lift off him so that he can slide off his trunks, and soon they’re floating around us along with my bikini top. Sweat has broken out across Blake’s forehead, and his expression is tense with anticipation. His hands settle on my hips as I straddle him once more, and I’m careful not to press myself too closely to him since I need enough room to jerk him off.
The second my hand wraps around his velvety length, Blake drops his head back against the edge of the hot tub, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he hisses between his teeth. I smoothly begin to move my hand up and down, and I smile as Blake’s lips part, his breath hitching. I’m eager to watch him lose control, and I reach down with my other hand to play with his balls. Blake mutters something under his breath, and he stretches his arms out across the back of the hot tub so that he can grip the edge, and he starts pumping his hips in time to my strokes.
“I’m going to come from just watching you,” I murmur as mini waves surround us as his hips quicken.
His head jerks upright, and his dark, heavy-lidded eyes hold mine until he lets out a hoarse shout and stiffens. Then he drops his head back, eyes closing as he draws in a few deep breaths until he goes completely still.
After I release him, I move forward and lovingly press my lips against his neck. “I really enjoyed that,” I whisper.
His arms close around me, and his chest rumbles as he chuckles. “I think I enjoyed it more than you did. I feel selfish. I haven’t had the chance to turn the tables on you so that I can make you feel as good as you make me feel.”
I press my nose against his neck, nuzzling him affectionately as he begins to rub my bare back. It feels good just to have him hold me. I’m happy with the simplest forms of affection, and I like to savor these small moments. “It’s okay. I kind of like being in control.”
“I noticed.”
“Is that okay?” I ask, suddenly uncertain. Some guys like an assertive girl, and other guys like to be the ones in control.
“Absolutely,” Blake assures. “It turns me on like you wouldn’t believe. I want my chance to play sometime too, though. So maybe when you’re in the mood, you can let me take the lead, hm?” he asks as his lips brush my temple.
“Sure.” I don’t have to have control all of the time, but I definitely like it when my partner doesn’t mind.
“Blake?”
We both stiffen as a new voice cuts into our intimate conversation.
Blake immediately tightens his arms around me so that my breasts stay pressed against his chest, and he peers over my shoulder. “Dad,” he says stiffly.
Oh crap, this is embarrassing. I’ve been caught in the act before with a guy, but usually it’s a pissed off soon-to-be-ex-girlfriend, or it’s someone that accidently stumbled across us.
“Who’s your friend?” I hear his dad ask.
Blake’s body tenses further. “Can you give us a little privacy?” he asks darkly.
“Of course,” a smooth voice replies. “I’ll be in the kitchen.” The sound of the patio door sliding shut reaches my ears.
“He’s not supposed to be home yet,” Blake bites out. He reaches with one hand to grab my bikini top that’s floating around near us. “Here, sink down further into the water, and I’ll grab our towels.”
I work on slipping on the top, and Blake hurriedly pulls on his swimming trunks before climbing out of the hot tub. He strides over to the towels and picks them up, his expression closed off, his lips flat. Once I am decent, I quickly climb out, and Blake wraps a fluffy towel around my wet body.
He’s upset, and I reach out and touch his bare chest. I’m not accustomed to seeing him like this. I’ve learned that Blake has a naturally positive disposition, and it bothers me when someone causes him any kind of distress. “Hey, it’s okay. We’re not the first to be caught by an adult. I bet it happens a lot.”
He gazes down at me with barely veiled anger. “It’s not that. He had to have seen us from the windows first, and he made the choice to come out anyway. He did it to embarrass you.”
“Because I’m not Camilla,” I state.
“Let’s just get this over with,” Blake mutters. After running his hands through his damp hair, he begins escorting me across the deck to the glass doors. “I’m sorry, Fallon. I had no idea that he might come home early,” he say
s under his breath.
“It’s not your fault. This isn’t a big deal,” I promise.
Blake leads me inside, and a tall, well-dressed man in a business suit stands there. He is strikingly handsome for his age, and his resemblance to his son is remarkable.
“I didn’t know you’d be home early tonight,” Blake says in a stiff voice as he stares hard at his father.
Brown eyes that are eerily similar to Blake’s wander over me before shifting to the protective arm that Blake has wrapped around me. “I thought we could have dinner at the country club since my meeting was cancelled,” his father says.
“This is Fallon McAllister. Fallon, meet my dad, William Cavanaugh,” Blake politely introduces.
Blake’s father steps forward, hand outstretched. “Miss McAllister,” he says with a polished smile.
I can read him easily, and the look in his eye tells me that he thinks I’m trash, and that his son is way too good for me. “Mr. Cavanaugh,” I murmur, politely shaking his hand.
“I’m going to take Fallon home. I’ll be back shortly,” Blake announces. Before his father can respond, Blake grabs my hand, tugging me out of the kitchen and into the hallway.
We both are silent as we go upstairs to change. When we come back down five minutes later, Blake escorts me straight to the garage, and then he proceeds to drive me home in silence.
“See you tomorrow,” I murmur after he pulls up to the corner.
Blake looks at me, his expression softening. “Do you work tomorrow?” When I nod, he asks, “Can I pick you up?”
“Sure.”
He leans over for a short but sweet kiss. “I’ll see you then.”
I climb out of the car and give him a quick wave. Once I’m inside my room, I lie down on the bed as my thoughts darken.
I’d hated how Mr. Cavanaugh had looked at me. I’m tired of people looking at me like that, and I’m perfectly aware that it’s my own fault. I know I don’t belong in Blake’s world, and yet I can’t seem to walk away. Blake makes me feel elated and happy when I’m with him, and a different side of myself comes out—one I hadn’t even known existed. It feels so good to be carefree with him, to not have anything to worry over when we’re together. It’s easy to forget the darker parts that still reside within me somewhere.
Shameless (Loving Fallon Book 1) Page 13