by Lace, Lisa
*
I stood chatting with Jakk on the bridge as we sped towards Wormhole 87. The scientists had gone through all the calculations many times to ensure that everything was correct. That Elara — she was meticulous, I had to give her that. And unbelievably intelligent for a human. She must have a Susohnnan brain inside.
“We should be there by morning,” Jakk said. “We’ll start the destabilization procedures as soon as we arrive. Our teleportation crew will be rotating shifts trying to keep them from getting a lock on anyone on board.”
“I pray that we can keep everyone safe while we try this crazy plan. Maybe we should have brought fewer people with us,” I said, starting to worry again.
“Dar, relax. We needed every person who came with us — we’re a skeleton crew as it is. Everyone on board knows what they signed up for, it’s volunteer only. It’s all good, friend. Relax.”
Kenna came up beside me and my heart skipped a beat. She didn’t take my hand or snuggle up to me, but she made it clear that she was with me. It made me happy. Even if our relationship was unclear, I was serious when I said I was falling in love with her again.
Jakk turned to Kenna.
“Kenna, how are you doing?” He grinned at her as if I wasn’t even there. She smiled back.
“Other than scared out of my wits that we won’t be able to pull this off? I’m doing okay. You ready?”
“I’m always ready, meerallia,” he said, giving her a look that grated on my nerves. He was my friend and she was my girlfriend…kind of. Meerallia? How dare he be so familiar with my female? What did he think he was doing?
Kenna gave me a questioning glance. She would be asking me what that meant when we were alone. I loved that I could already understand the looks she gave me.
I looked at Jakk in a different way now, not frowning, but not friendly anymore. He better stay away from my sheeranla.
I took a deep breath. Jakk seemed unaware of my hostility and I was glad of that. I was probably imagining things. Perhaps Jakk was simply a big flirt — I didn’t remember him but I had been acting like we were old friends. Thank goodness he hadn’t said something about our past yet to trip me up. I may have been making something out of nothing.
It bothered me that I was ready to turn on my friend just for smiling at my female, but it showed the depths of my feelings for her. Either that or it showed the lack of evolution males had gone through, no matter how much of our brains we used. Evolution didn’t matter if the little head between our legs was doing the thinking for us.
“Well, good,” Kenna said, her face serious as she turned to the view screen. “Because I think these guys are going to keep you on your toes.”
We all turned to look out the view screen. There was nothing to see yet. But the threat these aliens posed chilled me to the bone.
*
“So, what did that word mean, meerallia?” Kenna said, as she walked quickly to keep up with my stride. I slowed down a bit when I realized that she was practically running.
I made a face.
“It means…” I struggled to translate it into Unified. “I guess it means darling, or sweetheart.”
“That’s not too bad! The look you gave him, I thought it was an insult or something.”
“I wasn’t finished,” I said. “It has an added connotation that implies possession.”
“Possession.” She frowned.
“No, not like he owns you. It’s the way you would maybe say, MY darling, or MY sweetheart. You know what I mean?”
“Why would he say that to me?”
“I don’t know,” I said, irritably. “I’ve lost my memory, remember? But I have a feeling he’s a terrible flirt.”
“Oh yes,” she said, nodding. “I saw him talking to some of the female ensigns and he had them all hanging on his every word. You’d think he was single.”
I felt sad.
“What’s wrong?” she said immediately.
“He pulled me aside and told me that his wife had sent papers for the divorce. A Susohnnan would rather be exiled than get divorced.”
“That’s backward,” she said, frowning again. And I loved how her fine brown eyebrows drew together. I loved every expression that crossed her face, even the unattractive ones.
“Usually no one wants to get divorced because of the long engagement period. People put a lot of effort into their marriages. He won’t be shunned, but he won’t feel like a proper Susohnnan afterwards, or he may feel like a failure.”
“That’s not so bad.” Her eyes got a faraway look.
“What are you thinking about?”
She blushed. “Nothing you’d want to know about,” she said.
“No, really. I want to know.”
She said nothing. That’s when I realized that she had been thinking about what it might be like to be married to me. My mind flashed back to the note I had left for myself, the night I had remembered who I was.
Was now the time?
“Do you think you would want to marry me?” I said, softly.
“Dar, our situation is way too fucked up.”
“But what if this hadn’t come between us?”
She shrugged.
“I love you. I want to be with you for as long as you want me around. I don’t need to marry you.”
Something flashed in my brain when she said that. It seemed familiar.
“But would you want to?” I said, feeling my palms start to sweat. Maybe she loved me but didn’t want to marry me. I braced myself for rejection.
“Of course I would, you big oaf,” she said, wrapping her arms around my neck. “You have to make an honest woman of me, don’t you?”
With that, she went up on her tiptoes to kiss me, and I forgot all my problems.
“Goodnight, Dar,” she said finally, pulling herself away from me.
“Goodnight Kenna.”
*
After Kenna had left me at my door, I had tried to go to bed, but I couldn’t stop thinking about her. She filled my thoughts throughout the day and my dreams at night.
Making love to her had been unbelievable. I wanted to talk to her, walk with her, and yes, I wanted to have sex with her again. I didn’t know what was wrong with me, but I couldn’t help it. I went and knocked on her door.
She answered with a smile, as if she hadn’t been sleeping either.
“Hello,” she said, looking me up and down as if she liked what she saw.
“Hey,” I said, trying to play it cool. “Can I come in?”
“Sure,” she said, stepping back and opening the door wider. The first thing I saw was the big bed and I had a vision of us on it — naked and sweating, with me between her legs.
I snapped my attention back to the woman in front of me.
“Are you okay?” she said, studying me curiously.
“I’m not sure what’s wrong with me,” I said. “I’m kind of obsessed. And I hoped that maybe you would know what’s going on with me. I know we just did it but…I’m sorry. I feel like such an ass…” I trailed off, my face hot with embarrassment.
“Obsessed?” Her eyebrows wrinkled in the cutest way. “With what?”
My eyes dropped to the cleavage that was showing in the yellow Susohnnan shirt she wore. It cut low on her breasts and had a circle missing from the middle of the fabric on her torso, displaying her flat stomach. The pants were wide and loose.
I felt myself start to harden and my breathing become quick and erratic. She lifted one eyebrow.
“What’s the date?” she said, before I could answer her question. Maybe my drooling over her breasts had given her a clue. I didn’t know the date, but she checked the calendar on the console.
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“You happen to be nearing the end of your mating cycle and that’s why you can’t keep your eyes off my boobs.”
I pulled my eyes up to her face, feeling my cheeks heat up.
“Don’t be embarrassed. That’s
how it is for Susohnnan males,” she said. “Especially at the end of the cycle. I forgot you need to relieve the pressure every day or else you can get infected. You must be pretty desperate, huh?”
She began to unbutton the yellow shirt I was wearing. Oh, thank God she was going to let me fuck her. I thought I would die if she didn’t.
It wasn’t slow and sweet like the last time. I couldn’t wait. I needed to sink deep inside her and feel her coming around me. I had never felt such a powerful need that I could remember.
I pushed her over to the bed and kissed her fervently. She responded passionately, pressing her naked body into mine. Her hands roamed over my back, stopping to squeeze my butt. Then her small hand closed around me and I groaned. She pulled on me a couple of times and I thought I would come right then and there.
But I remembered how we had made love the last time.
“Kenna,” I said, my voice already raspy with lust. “Do you want me?”
Her eyes darkened before she answered.
“Oh, God, yes.” Then she kissed me again. I pulled away after a minute and began kissing down her soft, smooth skin until I got to her hip. The bright red scar looked as if it was burning against her pale skin. I thought about how much she must love me to have been willing to do it.
That was enough. I felt my love for her welling up in my chest and all of a sudden, I was myself again. She had an incredulous smile on her face as she realized that the man she loved was back. I stopped thinking at the moment when I leaned over and pressed my lips to the scar.
Her breath hissed in and her hips bucked. She clearly enjoyed this part of making love. I crawled back up her body, kissing and licking and sucking. Then I took her lips again that were already swollen and pink. We kissed and she squirmed beneath me, her hand going to my own triangle-shaped scar.
I made sure she was wet and ready before I flipped her over, kneeling behind her sweet ass. And with that, I pressed into her until I was surrounded by her sweet warmth.
I thrust into her from behind, reaching around to touch her hard little nub. Minutes later, she was coming. Thank goodness. I needed to cum so badly.
I drove into her, my balls hitting her soft flesh and bouncing off with every thrust.
Oh please, I thought. I plunged into her soft, warm wetness harder and faster until I felt my own release take me.
I groaned. The ecstasy was overwhelming and I felt myself spasm involuntarily several more times until I had emptied myself into her.
We lay down on the bed, snuggling close together. “I do love you, Kenna,” I said, meaning every word.
She smiled a lazy smile.
“I love you, too.”
KENNA
The next morning we reached the wormhole and as soon as we arrived, I felt useless on the bridge. They didn’t need me to make decisions. They didn’t need me at all.
I whispered in Dar’s ear.
“I’m going. You don’t need me right now. I’m just in the way.”
The bridge looked like an anthill with dozens of crew members and scientists with their tablets of notes scurrying here and there. I wondered where Elara was since she was going to be leading the show.
“Don’t go,” he said.
“I have to. I’m going to get run over.” I pointed to my comm unit. “Call me if you need me.”
He smiled. “Okay.”
A second later, his attention was back on what the person next to him had been showing him when I interrupted.
I felt left out but I chided myself. I was being silly. This wasn’t my specialty. It was theirs. It’s not like mine was really in demand.
The ability to grow plants wasn’t particularly useful when we were in the depths of space.
I hurried down the hall, looking for a bathroom. I hadn’t gone for quite a while. As I rounded a corner, I ran into someone so hard I fell down.
“Oh my God,” she said. Clearly she was human and not a Susohnnan female who would have exclaimed something about The Three. I noticed that Dar had forgotten all about his spiritual practices because he no longer swore by The Three.
It was weird. His speech felt stilted without those exclamations.
When I got back on my feet and saw who it was, I smiled.
Elara.
“What are you doing here? I’m pretty sure they’re waiting for you on the bridge,” I said. “Where were you?”
“I was throwing up.”
“Sweetie. It’s going to be okay.”
“How can you know that?”
“My future mother-in-law says so.” I grinned, remembering how Dar’s mother had told me that she was going to have grandchildren before she died. I couldn’t give her grandchildren in the future if I was flattened in a wormhole today.
“Are you serious?”
“The Susohnnan are always serious,” I said.
She pulled herself up.
“That makes me feel an infinitesimal amount better,” she said.
She placed her hands together in front of her chest in a prayer position and closed her eyes. I noticed that her hands weren’t red and cracked anymore. I hoped the labrador tea had worked.
I felt out of place. “What are you doing now?” I whispered.
“Calming myself.”
“Elara,” I said. “That’s going to have to do. There’s no time. They’re already trying to keep the aliens from beaming us all on to their slave ships.”
“Right. Right,” she said, nodding her head vigorously.
“Are your hands better?” I said, trying to take her mind off her nerves.
She smiled broadly.
“They’re the best they’ve been in years. I don’t itch anymore and the skin is beautiful.” She held them up to show me.
“That’s great,” I said. The distraction about her hands had worked, taking her mind off of the destabilization. I grabbed at the chance to send her on to the bridge. “Now go. They need you. You’re the only one who can do this. You’re brilliant.”
She smiled again and it was a little stronger this time.
“You’re brilliant too, Kenna. Thank you so much.” She walked backwards down the hall and held up her hands palms towards herself. “This is a gift. You should share it with everyone.”
She turned and ran down the hall towards the bridge.
And I stood there, transfixed.
My green thumb and healing people with plants was a gift? I supposed it was. My Gran had given it to me. And the look on Elara’s face as she had explained about her recovery had been pure gold. I would feel useful if I helped people the way I helped Elara.
But how?
I turned and kept walking towards the cafeteria to get some food. My mind was going a million miles an hour.
I could stay put somewhere for more than a few weeks and actually grow things. Then I could prepare them the way my grandmother had taught me. With those medicines, I could help people who needed it. And even though I couldn’t take a garden with me, I could take prepared herbs and salves and other things to make people well.
It’s all up here, I thought, tapping my head. Everything I need to finally be useful.
As long as I survive the next hour.
DAR
I watched as Elara and Jakk talked quietly. It was almost time. Her face was calm but she was as pale as a ghost. Kenna had told me that she was worried about being the person in charge of something so important.
I wouldn’t want to be in her position either.
I had to admit that I was glad that having no memories made me have less responsibility. As soon as it went through my mind, I realized it was a lazy thought.
We had retreated as far back as we could go while still being within the range for the equipment that would destabilize the wormhole. The idea was begin the process and then get out of the way before we got pulled in.
Eventually we would need to dart back in closer than our current position. To reverse things the equipment needed to be at close range.<
br />
The trick was to destabilize the wormhole after the aliens were all destroyed but before everything in our galaxy was sucked into an out of control black hole, ending life as we knew it. It was going to be some trick.
I didn’t envy Elara and Jakk. She was timing the destabilization and he was maneuvering the ship so that it would be at the right place at the right time. They each had their crew at the ready.
There were thousands of alien ships that were positioned all over this sector. As I watched the wormhole, another one came through. It was insane. This had to work or we were all going to be made into slaves.
I listened as Jakk contacted Earth and Susohn, confirming that the mission was a go.
I held my breath as Elara raised her hand and gave the signal to begin destabilization.
“Begin destabilization procedure,” she said, her voice low but firm.
The scientists tapped at their consoles and kept their eyes glued to their screens. The rest of us watched the main view screen for signs of any change.
There was nothing.
I wondered if in spite of all their calculations, they had made a mistake.
Suddenly there was a fluctuation in the wormhole’s structure. I watched again, but maybe I had just imagined it. No. There it was again. It began to change from an orderly spiral shape into something more chaotic.
I felt a tight coil of fear in my guts as I watched it. This was out of control. It was something that could destroy us all.
I glanced at Elara. Her eyes were wide in her pale face. Jakk was watching her, his jaw rigid, his hands positioned over his console.
“Now! Retreat,” she said, and Jakk sprang into action. I stumbled as the space craft took off so quickly that we felt the acceleration.
He must be slipping. He had been the slickest of pilots from the time he was an adolescent. He would never have made a movement like that if all our lives weren’t at stake.
I froze at the thought. I knew something about Jakk. He was an amazing pilot.
I smiled a little. Life as we knew it was hanging in the balance and I was happy about some useless little memory I could recall. If we ever got out of this, it might mean that my memory was coming back.
At the thought, I realized that we might not get out of this alive and there was something I had to do before I died. Quietly, I tapped on my comm unit.