“Ava, if I thought it was a good idea, I’d screw the first guy I bump into when we walk out of here. You have no idea how much I miss sex.”
“I can’t imagine. I’ve been so, you know, into it since I got pregnant. Even more than before.”
“Do you realize how much I despise you right now?” Karly snarled.
“You loooove me,” Ava sang. “Did you know our babies can see light now?”
“Yes, I got that alert on my phone last week.”
“Isn’t it the coolest thing ever? We are making little tiny humans!”
Karly nodded, studying her salad.
“Have you felt yours move yet?” Ava asked.
Karly shook her head.
“I swear I can feel him or her swimming around, but Cole says it’s probably gas or something. Why are you so quiet?”
“Do you ever get the feeling that something is terribly wrong? I see you feeling so great and wonderful, and I’ve felt miserable through the entire pregnancy. And now you’ve felt your baby moving and I haven’t, even though I look way more pregnant than you.”
Ava shoved her plate to the side and reached across the table. She grasped Karly’s hand and pulled it forward so their hands could rest together in the middle.
“Karly, don’t even think that way. All pregnancies, all women, all babies are different. Your baby is going to be amazing. And he or she is going to grow up to marry my little munchkin and we’ll finally be sisters through marriage.”
Karly smiled through her veil of tears.
“I’ve never been so emotional in my life.” Karly sniffled.
“You must be having a girl,” Ava joked. “These babies sure do a number on us, don’t they?”
“Nothing a little Christmas shopping won’t cure.” Karly wiped away her tears and mentally planned her best course of action for blowing her paycheck.
Shopping with Ava turned out to be the most therapeutic thing she could have done.
“What’s so fascinating on your phone?” Ava asked.
Karly shrugged. She didn’t want to admit that she kept looking at the photo she had taken of the gift Ben had given their baby—a sweet little onesie with his company’s logo. She didn’t know why his gesture had hit her so intensely. Something about the act of gift-giving left her perplexed. When he had given her a gift, she had half convinced herself that it was part of his seduction.
But what would motivate the purchase and delivery of this adorable little baby item?
“You’re lost in your thoughts. Care to share?” Ava leaned forward, trying to sneak a peek.
Karly relented and turned the phone toward Ava.
“Aww! Cole had better get one of those for our baby!”
“I’m sure he will.”
“When did he do that?”
“He left it on my door when I went to the hotel.”
“So sweet. Guess he’s accepting the situation, huh?”
“Is that what this means?” Karly searched for answers in Ava’s face, then in the picture.
“I’d say so! Seems like a gesture of love to me.” Ava smiled and hugged Karly’s arm. “I think this is going to work out for you two crazies.”
“There’s nothing to work out, Ava.”
“What did he say about the gift?”
“Nothing. He left it on the door.”
“And when you called him to tell him you love it?”
Karly clicked the phone off. “I didn’t.”
“What? Why not?”
“I don’t do mushy. Come on. Let’s shop.”
Ava dropped the subject, thankfully.
They each bought a few gender-neutral outfits, and they stopped in the book store to prepare a list of books they wanted to add to the future libraries of their babies.
“Can you believe this is real?” Karly stopped in the middle of the aisle. “You’re going to be a mother. I’m going to be a mother.”
Her lungs tightened, limiting her ability to gather a deep breath.
“Karly, come sit.” Ava led Karly to a nearby chair. “Breathe.”
“I can’t be a mother.”
“Too late, sweetie.”
“No. I cannot be someone’s mother. I can barely take care of myself. I had to work out a payment plan to fix my car, for crying out loud. How am I supposed to do this?”
“Karly, let’s go to the car and talk.”
Karly knew people watched and listened, but she couldn’t find it in her to care.
“Ava, I can’t do this.” She grabbed her friend’s sleeve, holding on as if the trolls of her fears were about to tear her away. “What do I do?”
Ava knelt before Karly.
“You do what women have always done. You move forward. You are going to be a great mom. Your baby may not have been planned, but he or she is incredibly lucky to have you.”
Karly shook her head.
“Maybe I should give it up for adoption.”
“That’s an option, but I don’t think you want that.”
“I want to go back in time and wear a chastity belt.”
Ava laughed.
“Here, drink a sip of my juice. You look like you need some sugar.”
Karly complied, because she felt like she might pass out.
As she handed the bottle back to Ava, she felt a flutter inside her belly.
Her hands flew to her gut as her mouth dropped open.
“What’s wrong?”
“I think I felt it!”
“The baby?”
“The baby!”
“Oh my goodness!” Ava squealed, clapping her hands together and bouncing on her knees. “You felt it!”
“My baby. I felt my baby.”
Tears streamed down Karly’s face as she held on to her belly. Her most treasured possession. The most miraculous thing she had ever done. Her baby.
Ava cried along with her.
“I’m so excited that it happened when I was with you. This is the best day ever!”
They laughed and hugged and Ava forced Karly to drink more juice so she could trigger more movement.
Karly couldn’t stop smiling.
Her baby liked juice.
When they could finally compose themselves, Karly put an end to the day. She went home, stripped naked, and stretched out on her bed, watching her belly to see if she’d detect any movement on the outside.
She couldn’t yet, but she thrilled every time she felt her baby wiggle on the inside.
This private time with her belly became her favorite pastime.
She had been so focused on her dates with her belly that she lost all track of the passing days. Before she knew it, Christmas Eve had arrived and Ben was standing at her door.
***
“You’re not dressed to go out,” Ben accused.
He looked her up and down. Damn, he had missed her. Clothed in a long sleeve shirt and pajama pants with frogs all over them, she looked as alluring as she had in her cocktail gown. Maybe more so.
He could tell she wasn’t wearing a bra, and his palms itched to offer support to her ever-growing breasts.
Pregnancy looked good on Karly.
“I told you this is a pajama pants kind of night.”
“And I texted you to let you know I’d be here at four and to be dressed for a night out.”
“And I texted you back with an emoticon that had its tongue sticking out.”
“And I was supposed to interpret that as a refusal?”
Karly rolled her eyes. “Don’t you know your emoticons?”
“Good thing I assumed you’d be defiant. I brought you something to wear. You said your belly has been growing, so the lady at the shop helped me pick something that should be comfortable.”
“You bought me clothes?”
“Don’t be offended.”
“We’ll see how offended I am based on what you picked out.” She winked when she said the words.
He held the bag out to her and prayed to the fas
hion gods that she’d approve.
She lifted the box from the bag, carefully lifting the lid to expose the dress.
Her eyes lit up when she pulled the red slouch neck dress from the box.
“You picked this out?”
“With some help. But yes. I thought you’d make it look stunning.”
Her smile consumed her face.
“You did good, Ben Knight.”
She hip-checked him on her way to her room, hugging the dress to her chest.
When she emerged a few moments later, he had to swallow to avoid drooling down his chin.
Damn, she could fill out a dress.
The fabric clung to her chest, her hips, and her sweet and somehow sexy belly. The hemline stopped at her thighs, giving him a view of the legs he wanted to bury himself between. Her cleavage taunted him from above the scooped neck.
He cleared his throat and checked his watch.
“Ready?”
Her face fell. Shit, he forgot to communicate how delicious she looked.
Not his fault—he couldn’t think with her assets teasing him.
“You look… enchanting.”
He meant it.
He had never seen a more beautiful woman in his life.
“Thank you.”
She stroked her belly, and he fought the urge to sweep her into his arms.
He couldn’t disrespect her like that, though.
She was carrying his child. She deserved to be worshipped, cared for, not used to sate his appetite.
If she could struggle to carry his baby for nine months, he could live without sex for that long.
His nuts screamed in protest, then huddled up next to his body for comfort.
“Where are we going, anyway? You were so mysterious on the phone.” She smiled at him as she slipped on an earring.
She mesmerized him. From what he could tell, she wasn’t wearing any makeup. Her hair was still in the sloppy bun she had been wearing when he arrived. Yet she looked like she should be starring in a lingerie ad or on the cover of a magazine.
Unexplained rage had his heart thudding.
He wouldn’t want her on display for anyone else. Only him.
He grimaced, frustrated with himself for allowing his thoughts to continually raise the beast.
He wondered if his doctor could prescribe something that could kill erections…
It would certainly help him be a more honorable man.
“Ben?”
“Yeah, sorry. Boston. We’re going to the ballet.”
He didn’t miss the delight on her face. She bounced in excitement.
“The Nutcracker?” she asked, nearly breathless.
So he had chosen well.
He nodded.
She squealed, then threw her arms around his neck.
“I went once as a little kid, but have wanted to go back for years. Thank you, Ben.”
“My pleasure. But we have to hit the road if you don’t want to miss it.”
“So where have you been, anyway?”
He glanced at her as he entered the highway.
“Missed me, huh?”
“No.”
“Liar.”
“The baby was wondering.”
“It’s okay to ask me things, you know. You’re allowed to wonder.” He reached over and rested his hand on her thigh. Her warmth scorched his fingers. If the world worked the way he wanted it to, he’d pull over to the side of the road and show her how much he had missed her.
But that wouldn’t be respectful.
She didn’t ask any more questions, but he decided to answer the unspoken ones.
“I had to move my mother to a new home. Apparently her behavior is too violent for the one she was in.”
“Oh. I’m… sorry to hear that. It’s good of you to take care of her when she didn’t take care of you.”
“I’m a sucker, I guess. But if I don’t, who will?”
“Did you move her closer than Virginia?”
“The temptation was to move her farther away, but yes, she is now safely jailed, I mean living, in New England. It will be much easier to rush off to do her bidding now.”
“You’re a good son.”
He growled, uncomfortable with her thinking he was doing this to be kind.
He was honor bound to take care of his biological mother. There was no affection. No bond. She didn’t recognize him or know him. He had the money to pay for her to be taken care of, and even though he had suffered because of her abandonment, he could only imagine that life would have been worse in her care.
Once the awkwardness of that conversation had passed, the ride down was surprisingly pleasant. He couldn’t remember a time when he had enjoyed female companionship more. She had interesting opinions, asked questions about his work, and shared funny anecdotes about her coworkers.
And even though she had teased him about his music before, this time she cranked the volume and sang along.
Ben had always loved having a gorgeous woman on his arm, but tonight he felt like the envy of the world.
Pregnant or not, Karly commanded the attention of everyone she passed.
And she knew it, which made him even hotter.
Sure, she was hot. She had all the right curves in all the right places. But her confidence was possibly the most sexy thing about her. He had been with so many women who begged for compliments, or who put themselves down so he’d have to build them back up.
He hated the games, but had always assumed it was par for the course. If he wanted to indulge his sexual whims, he had to placate her insecurities.
Karly stood on her own two feet. She didn’t need him to make her feel better. She didn’t appear to need him for anything, which is what made giving her these special dates all the more fun for him.
She couldn’t turn him down when it was something she desperately wanted.
The ballet wasn’t quite his thing, but watching her watching it with childlike innocence made the whole thing worthwhile.
He decided at that moment, when some sort of giant rodent pulled out a sword, that this would be an annual Christmas tradition. Karly, him, and their child.
He told her on the ride home.
She didn’t respond. But he thought he heard her sniffling.
The rest of the ride was silent.
She had fallen asleep long before they pulled into her driveway. As soon as he turned the car off and opened his door, she jerked awake.
“Sorry I fell asleep.”
She looked adorable wiping the drool away from the side of her mouth.
“I so don’t feel like putting those heels back on. Why does there have to be snow on the ground? I need to move to a warmer climate.”
As she attempted to wiggle her obviously sore feet into her shoes, he lifted her from the car.
She wiggled, nearly making him slip on the ice.
“Hold still, woman. Before we both land in the snow.”
“You can’t carry me! I’m too heavy!”
“I am carrying you, and you insult me.”
She stopped wiggling and rested her head on his shoulder. Her breath tickled his neck. He wished the driveway were longer so he didn’t have to put her down.
“You should lock your doors,” he cautioned as he swung her door open.
“Then how would you walk in uninvited all the time?”
A chuckle rose from his gut right up through his mouth.
“You’re terrible for my ego, you know.”
“Good,” she murmured, nuzzling into his neck some more. “Someone needed to take that ego down a notch.”
He carried her to her bed, placing her down gently. The urge to join her was strong, but he could be stronger. He had to be stronger.
But so help him God, if she so much as hinted that she wanted him to join her, he wouldn’t be able to walk away. Not with her looking so cozy and sweet and with that dress riding up to rest just below her ass…
With a soft moan, she cu
ddled under her blanket and rolled over.
That solved that problem.
Just as well. Their lives were complicated enough without adding sex.
He knew he’d never sleep, which was just as well since he had a trunk full of Christmas decoration that needed to be set out before his Christmas angel awoke.
Chapter Fourteen
She thought she heard Christmas music, so she buried her head under the blanket, cursing the neighbors. Didn’t they know Scrooge lived next door?
Pumpkin spice wafted into her room, filling her nose and making her stomach growl.
She kicked her way out of her blankets, yanked off the thigh-highs she had slept in, and shuffled her way out to her kitchen.
She blinked at the sight greeting her in the kitchen.
“Merry Christmas!” Ben shouted, ringing a bell as he flipped a pancake.
“You’re wearing a Santa hat.”
“Indeed I am. Would you like to come and sit on Santa’s lap?”
She laughed in spite of her dislike of the holiday.
“Maybe later. I didn’t know you could cook.”
“There are many secrets up my sleeve. Here, come taste.”
She moaned in delight. The pancake tasted every bit as delicious as it smelled.
“That’s amazing. I could get used to waking up to that.”
“Well,” he said, shrugging. “You could marry me.”
Choosing to take his flippant suggestion as a joke, she laughed. Then she noticed the decorations.
“It looks like Christmas threw up in here.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
“Not sure it was meant as one. Is that tinsel dangling off my cabinet?”
“Okay, okay. I’m not a decorator. Here, take another bite.”
She dragged a stool over to the island and indulged in a plate full of pancakes.
“We’ll add this to the list of traditions.” Ben pointed at the plate of pancakes with the spatula. “Anything you’d add?”
“I’ll be right back.”
She rushed to the bathroom, eager to empty her bladder and avoid this awkward topic he kept bringing up.
She took a quick shower while she was in the bathroom, then slipped into her most comfortable pajamas. She had meant what she said about this being comfy pajama day. She took her own traditions very seriously.
Ben was cleaning up the kitchen when she strolled through.
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