Maybe I could get a job when I turned sixteen and got some extra cash. I wouldn't tell my mother, that was for sure. I wanted to be able to keep the money for myself. I wanted to save up to go to college.
I had been spending time with my friend Yumo as of late. Her mother had been pushing me to be better. She had been the one who made me want to be a better person. She also showed me what a real mother was like.
Yumo was the one to help me when I needed it, though she didn't know how bad my living situation was. She just thought I was poor, and I was fine with her thinking that. It was better than my mother was a druggie and can't afford to get me new clothes or forgot to feed me.
There had been more than one occasion where Yumo had shared her lunch with me because I didn't have anything.
"I have four more years," I whispered to myself as I shifted so I could lay on the couch, "Four more years and I can be out of this apartment." I wanted to be able to come and go as I pleased, and I would like to be able to fully care for myself.
I had to have been sitting there in my thoughts for longer than I thought because I heard a loud noise by the entrance of the apartment. I heard a loud curse and knew my mother had arrived home. She was probably looking for her key.
That was good, at least I knew she was alive.
I got up off the couch and made my way to the door, unlocking the deadbolt and opening the door. There kneeling in front of the door was my mother looking through the spilled contents of her purse. I took a deep breath and gave her a greeting.
"Morning."
Her eyes flashed to mine before a scowl came to her face. Her makeup was faded and a bit smeared off her lips, and she had mascara stains on her cheeks, making me think she had been crying.
"What are you doing awake?" Her tone was accusatory and she shoved the rest of the contents that had been laying on the ground into her purse. She stood up and I could tell she was still high. Her pupils were dilated and she wasn't looking directly at me.
"I couldn't sleep." It was the truth, I hadn't been able to get but a couple hours of sleep and had been up listening to music until I gave up on that too.
"Good, then you can start making breakfast. Robert is going to be here in an hour."
Robert. He was one of her old flames. One that got too close to me.
I froze and looked at my mother in horror. "Why is he coming over?" I won't cry. I won't cry. If I stayed in the same room as my mother he couldn't hurt me.
"He is bringing me something. Just make breakfast and you can either leave or stay in your room." She pushed her way into the apartment another curse leaving her lips as she went to her room and I heard a slam of the door.
"Definitely gonna leave," I said to myself, as I shut the apartment door and locked it again. I hurried to my bedroom and quickly grabbed my backpack, making sure everything was in there. I grabbed my headphones and small iPod, putting them in the bag before zipping it up. I then quickly got dressed in a pair of jeans and a plain blue t-shirt. I grabbed a pair of sandals and the bag before making my way back to the kitchen. I sat my bag and shoes on the two person kitchen table.
I would make a quick breakfast and leave. I didn't want to chance running into that man again. I could still remember his leering eyes and his hard hands on me. I willed back tears as I put the pan on the stove.
Today would get better. One step at a time. That is all.
It didn’t take me long to make two omelets and put them on a plate in the microwave before I was out the front door.
I heard my mother in the shower, so I was leaving before she had a chance to stop me. There was no way I was going to hang around with him there.
I stepped onto the silent street, it was still early, only around six in the morning, but if I walked to school instead of taking the bus I would be there with plenty of time to relax and wait for Yumo to arrive.
I just had to hope that Robert was gone by the time school was done.
I could only hope.
~Clara~
I woke with a gasp, my legs tangled in the sheets of the bed. I blinked my eyes, getting them to focus. I heard a wine and something wet on my cheek.
"I'm fine, Ace," I gasped out, as I ran a hand through my hair. It was damp with sweat and I felt clammy. I sat up my head pounding as I sighed.
Ace gave another whine, using his nose to nudge my arm.
I gave a smile as I looked down at the hellhound. "I'm fine." I gave him a pat, but he still watched me with cautious eyes.
"Don't worry." I stood up and gave him another reassuring pat on the head.
He whined again, as he looked at me. If he could talk I had a feeling he would be asking me a bunch of questions.
I took a deep breath and made my way to the bathroom, my feet shuffling against the cool ground. I hit the switch, and the bathroom flooded with light. I moved and stood in front of the mirror and wasn't surprised to see my reflection. I looked grey, my eyes dilated and sweat dripped down my face.
"Don't I look a right mess?" I asked my reflection, resting my hands on each side of the vanity. I hadn't had a bad nightmare for a while, so it wasn't a surprise I was so shaken up. Lately my mind had been so caught up with my new situation with the gods that I hadn't had time to think of my past. Tonight though, it came back with a vengeance.
I closed my eyes, gripping the edge of the sink. I was so tired, but I knew I wasn't going to be able to fall asleep after that dream. I hadn't dreamed of Robert for a while now. He had been one of the men who got too close to me when I was younger. He was one of my personal demons for the rest of my life.
"Clara."
I jumped, my eyes snapping open as I looked over to the door. Ra stood there looking at me with worry. His gold eyes looked me over as if looking for an injury.
"What are you doing here?" I breathed out in surprise. I had thought he wasn't on Olympus. I hadn't seen him since he had things to do in Egypt.
He didn't answer me as he stepped into the bathroom and gently brushed my hair out of my face. I could see the look of disapproval as he touched my pale skin.
"I got back a few hours ago." He cupped my cheek, making me look up at him.
I could see worry on his face, as a frown crossed his lips.
"Why were you so scared and anxious?" Ra asked, he kept me looking at him. He wasn't going to back down till I told him.
I didn't know if I wanted any of them to know about my horrible childhood.
"A dream. That’s all," I told him, and that was true. It was a dream and he couldn't hurt me anymore. Robert was only a memory and he couldn't hurt me anymore.
Ra's hand fell from my face, a sad sigh leaving his lips. "It was more than a dream. That kind of fear only comes from knowledge of whatever you dreamed of."
He wasn't wrong. I did dream of something I went through. I didn't want to think about it though.
"I am fine," I told him, not backing down on telling him it was just a dream. I was fine, I survived it and was going through another day without that man in my life.
Sighing, Ra circled his arms around my waist so I was flush with him. "You don't have to tell me anything if that is what you wish. Just know any of us are here to talk to you." He paused before giving my forehead a kiss and stepping back from me. "I know you don't like talking about your past. From what Zeus said about your mother, I have a feeling you didn't have a good childhood."
I winced at this. He hit it spot on, I kept silent as he probably saw my reaction.
"I felt your fear while you dreamed, so I know what happened wasn't something good. You must have had a dream about your past, and you don't want to talk about it." Ra gave me a look that said he understood my reticence.
I truly didn't want to talk about it.
"You felt...it?" I knew when he said we bonded that he could feel some of my emotions, I just didn't know how much he would be able to feel.
Ra gave a sad smile. "Yes. It is like a quiet hum and constantly there. It isn't until you
feel intense emotions that I really notice. When you felt fear..." he trailed off as he looked down at me.
"I thought something happened to you when I first felt your fear. I came straight here. I am sure I almost offended another god because I cut the conversation short."
I bit my lip at that. I couldn't imagine him offending someone just because he felt something and came to see me as fast as he could. I didn't know what to say.
He must have known, because he sighed. "Come. I have a feeling you don't want to go back to sleep?"
I shook my head. I was wide awake now, and didn't want to go back to sleep just to have nightmares again.
"Alright. Why don't you change and I will take you somewhere." He chuckled at the look on my face. "Now don't be that way. I will take you somewhere you will like." Ra moved out of the bathroom, but gave me one last glance over his shoulder. "I will be outside your room. Come out when you are dressed."
He left me alone in the bathroom. I didn't know where he wanted to take me, but it wasn't like I had anything else to do.
I stepped out of my room. Ace followed a few steps behind me, his claws clicking on the stone floors. I glanced up to see Ra leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. As if sensing me, he opened his eyes, giving me a smile as he pushed off the wall to walk toward me.
His eyes traveled over me, I had changed into a pair of shorts and a green silk blouse, with sandals that matched in color. I gave him a look when I caught his eyes lingering in certain places.
Giving a grin, Ra moved to stand by me, his eyes briefly glancing at Ace before giving me his full attention. "Let's go for a walk. I heard you haven't seen the main gardens yet."
"No, I haven't gotten the chance yet." I smiled, as Ra took my arm and led me through the winding halls. I bet he heard my enthusiasm because he laughed as we turned a corner to a different hall.
"I had a feeling you haven't. I know the layout of Olympus can be a bit confusing at first. You just get used to it over time."
I nodded. I hadn't tried to navigate the halls by myself yet. I didn't think I wanted to until I was certain I could make it to the destination I wanted without getting lost.
"I know you are keeping me company, but shouldn't you be getting some sleep if you have been in Egypt since I saw you last?" I asked Ra as we turned into another hall, I could see the green of the trees now.
"I should be, but I’d rather spend time with you." He stopped at the entrance of the center garden and smiled at me.
My heart melted at the look he was giving me. It was so loving, I wasn't used to that kind of look from people.
"I missed you," he told me, leaning down so our noses were almost touching. "Did you miss me?"
A blush started to rise up my neck, as I tried not to look him in the eyes. "I may have." I didn't want to say I missed him. He was the sweet one out of the gods.
He chuckled and leaned forward, I thought he was going to kiss me, but at the last moment he moved his head, his lips brushing against my cheek.
"Good. I don't like being away from you." He then stepped back and put his hand on the small of my back, and led me through an open archway.
I was greeted with greens, reds, golds, and many more colors. The garden was beautiful. "Wow," I whispered as I stepped away from Ra to go deeper into the Garden. I had seen the garden when I had been walking by, but I had only seen a portion of the beauty of this garden. I had known it would be breathtaking because it was a garden made by and for the gods.
"It is awe-inspiring. Many gods worked on this garden and still add to it to this day," Ra commented as he moved to stand behind me.
I nodded. I could tell that a lot of work went into it. In the corner was a tall tree, going through the roof and hitting the glass that was letting a small amount of sun into the courtyard. The tree had to be almost as tall as a skyscraper, and hanging off the tree were the gold apples I had seen before. When I had first seen it, the tree hadn't seemed that large.
There was a fountain in the middle of the garden which reminded me of a wishing well, but it had elaborate designs carved into the store. There were pathways leading to different corners of the courtyard and in between were many different flowers. There had to be hundreds of different kinds. I couldn't even begin to name all of them. There was one bench in the garden and it sat under the golden apple tree.
"This place is beautiful." I tore my eyes away from the garden to look at the Egyptian god, a wide smile on my face. "Thank you for taking me here," I told him. I was thankful. I got to come and relax, instead of sitting in my room and going over my dream in my head a hundred times.
"I thought you could use some fresh air," he said, as he glanced behind me, a smirk on his face. "And your little protector seemed to want the same."
I turned and laughed, Ace was going through the flowers sniffing and patting his paw at the plant. He seemed to be enjoying himself.
"Thank you." I really meant it. This bond we had was different and I knew that if we tired, I could get used to it. It was still a bit weird for him to feel my emotions, but he had made me felt better.
"How have you liked Olympus so far? Have you gotten to go many places?"
I grinned. He was trying to make conversation and not go into an awkward silence. It was cute. "I have gotten to go to a few places. I met the Pegasus. That was an interesting first meeting." I rolled my eyes. I had been really surprised by the talking, winged horses. What normal human wouldn't be?
Rich laughter filled the courtyard. "The Pegasus are always something humans are surprised about."
We are surprised because normal animals don't talk.
"Let's sit and we can talk for a bit. No one is really awake right now. Only a few of the other gods who are arriving." Ra motioned to the bench under the tree. I let him lead me over and sat down, tilting my head back so I could look up at the tree.
"I have been to the library, and that is about it. I spent time yesterday talking to Poseidon at the Pegasus stables. We spent most of the day there talking," I told Ra, as I continued to look up at the green leaves of the tree. I could stay in nature all day and not get sick of looking at it.
"I am happy you are trying to accept us," Ra whispered.
I almost missed it because he spoke it so quietly. "I’m trying. I know I have been hard on you all. I have also been trying to keep you all at an arm's length." I paused, knowing I had his attention. I wanted to tell him that I wasn't sure about this still. That I didn't like being forced into this, but I couldn't deny that I felt the bond. That I wanted to get to know them.
"I may not always be onboard for this, but I am trying like I promised. I want to get to know you all." I took a deep breath and straightened my head so I could look at Ra.
He watched my every movement.
"I know I could fall in love with you all, which I’m trying to wrap my head around. In human standards, having a relationship with more than one person makes me whore..." I paused, the words feeling like sandpaper in my mouth, "or something along those lines."
"You need to stop thinking in human standards. It will be hard, but it will help things in the long run," Ra assured me. After a few second of silence, he shifted closer to me, taking my chin so I would look at him. "I am glad you could fall in love with us, because I know I love you already. I know it seems fast by your standards, but it’s true." His voice was soft, as he kept a firm grip on my chin so I couldn’t look away from him.
"I fell in love with you even though you didn't want anything to do with us. I am happy you will give this a chance. That is all I can ask of you." He leaned closer to me, letting me know what his intentions were. His gold eyes dark with what seemed like hunger.
"Know this, my little bonded, I will always be here and want to make you happy. You just have to let me in." He slanted his lips against mine.
Warmth filled me as I closed my eyes, getting lost in the feeling of his lips and heat.
I was starting to let them all in, but
I had to wonder if this would last.
~Eros~
I glanced around at the group that just arrived, I was done directing people. I had been at this too long, and I knew my mother wasn't feeling what I felt. She was happy with talking and greeting with people. She had a big smile on her face as she talked to the human who was bonded to the two gods who had just arrived.
"Aren’t you a pretty bird?" I heard my mother say to the blonde haired human.
The girl didn't look too impressed by my mother. This made a smirk come to my lips.
"I don't think she likes being called a pretty bird, Mother," I spoke, causing the girl to turn her attention to me.
Green eyes locked with mine, and I saw a flash of recognition.
I wondered why. I tilted my head at the girl, wondering why she would recognize me over my mother.
"Eros, love. All girls like being called pretty." My mother, Aphrodite, rolled her eyes at me.
I just shook my head at her. Yes, girls liked to be called pretty, but not all girls liked being complimented with a nickname. I knew Clara wasn't overly fond when we called her little dove.
"If you say so." I moved away when I saw another ripple in the shield signaling we had another new arrival. I was ready for everyone to be here so I wouldn't have to play nice with everyone. I hadn't gotten to see Clara since security had been put in place.
"You look so happy to be here," Hades commented as he passed through the shield, walking over to me. At least it wasn't another bonded pair or a new god. I was tired of talking to them all.
"You finished your business early. I thought you would be gone another day."
Hades had said he would be gone up to three days, but it seemed like he finished earlier than expected.
"I was going to stay later, but a development happened," Hades told me, a frown on his face.
I could feel the worry rolling off him in waves. "Development…" I didn't like the sound of that. I had a feeling today was going to turn into a day of meetings because of it.
Open Your Heart Page 8