by SR Silcox
A slight grimace passes over Bridget’s face. “Do you think you can find time to help your actual partner with her history assignment?” she asks. She’s obviously annoyed with me for spending time with Brittany. Too bad.
I shrug in reply.
“Because we need to find some time to get it done. Isn’t that what you said last week? I mean, I wouldn’t want to make you do all the work,” she snaps.
“Well maybe you can find another partner if you’re so worried about that,” I snap back.
Bridget lets out a breath. “Sorry.” She kicks the verandah post with her shoe. “I didn’t come here to argue with you about history.”
“Why did you come here then?”
“To make sure you were okay on your, you know, the anniversary.”
I’m glad she remembered but I don’t need her sympathy. “I’m fine. Is that all?”
“Well, there was one other thing.” She looks down at the ground.
I lean on the door frame and cross my arms. “What?”
“I wanted to ask you to the Valentine’s Dance,” she says quietly.
“I already said yes to Brittany.”
“Yeah, but you don’t really want to go with her, do you?” She looks at me hopefully. She’s right, of course. I would have loved to have gone with Bridget, but I’m not so sure anymore. “Remember what we talked about last week?” she asks.
“What? The fantasy dance? Isn’t that what you called it?”
“Maybe I’ve changed my mind,” Bridget says.
This is what I’ve been hoping for, but it’s too little, too late.
“I’m not going to ditch Brittany just so you can have a date for the dance,” I reply.
Bridget picks at her fingernail. “Fine. I guess I’ll just see you there then.”
“I guess,” I shrug.
“Fine,” Bridget says.
“Fine,” I reply.
Bridget turns to leave and then she turns back. “Are you really going out with her?”
“I don’t know,” I reply. It’s the truth but it feels like a lie.
Bridget nods and then turns and walks away. I take a deep breath and close the door. I lean against it for a moment to regain my composure and walk down to the kitchen where I find Mum standing at the stove stirring bolognese. I walk over and take the spoon from her and keep stirring.
“Everything okay?” Mum asks.
“Fine,” I reply. I seem to be saying that a lot lately, even though it’s not true.
“You didn’t ask Bridget for dinner?”
“She had stuff to do,” I lie.
“Maybe next time,” Mum says, dropping spaghetti into a boiling pot of water. “Luke dropped your suit off this afternoon. I put it in your room.”
“Thanks.”
“Why didn’t you tell me you asked a girl to go with you?”
I stop stirring the pot. “What?”
Mum leans back against the sink and crosses her arms across her chest. “Luke said you’d asked a girl from school to go to the dance with you tomorrow night. Why didn’t you tell me?”
Damn Luke. “I didn’t ask anyone.”
“Brittany. That’s her name, right?”
“Yes, but she’s just going with us as friends.”
“That’s not what Luke said.”
I drop the spoon into the pot, splashing sauce on the counter. “Do you always talk to Luke about my love life?”
“Luke mentioned it in passing when he dropped off your suit. Why are you so upset?”
“Because Luke should keep his mouth shut.”
“Quinn, what’s the matter with you?”
“Nothing,” I mumble as I storm out of the kitchen to my bedroom.
I shut the door and throw myself onto my bed. I knew I should’ve told Luke about Bridget and me. He wouldn’t have pushed so hard with Brittany. I can’t believe Bridget could think she could just patch things over by asking me to the dance tomorrow. I don’t even know what I want anymore. I know one thing. I don’t want to go to the dance with Brittany, but if I back out now, I’d be the biggest jerk at school. I’m not that sort of person.
It’s moments like this that I miss Dad. He never really talked much, especially not about feelings and stuff, but whenever I was upset or angry, he used to take me down to his shed and let me tinker with an old radio he had down there. It didn’t work, but he’d let me pull it apart and put it back together again whenever I had something on my mind, and by the time I was finished, I’d forgotten whatever I was angry or upset about. I never thought I’d miss a radio so much.
There’s a soft knock on my door and before I can answer, Mum peeks around it. “Quinn, can I come in?”
“I guess.”
Mum leans on the door frame and looks around my room. “You want to tell me what’s going on?”
I shrug. “It’s nothing.”
“It’s definitely not nothing, Quinn.”
I don’t answer her. Instead, I pick at a loose thread on my doona cover.
“I know about Bridget,” Mum says suddenly.
I sit up straight. “What do you mean?”
Mum sits down at the foot of my bed. “You like her. A lot. And she likes you.” She smiles at me but I’m not sure what to think.
“How did you know?”
“Oh, Quinn. I’m your mother. I know you better than you know yourself sometimes. And I was your age once. I know the signs of young love.”
Just hearing her say the words ‘young love’ about me and Bridget makes my chest hurt. When I don’t reply, Mum says, “Did you break up? Is that what this afternoon was all about?”
“It’s complicated,” I reply.
Mum chuckles. “Relationships always are.”
“This one’s really complicated. You wouldn’t understand.”
Mum puts her hand on my leg. “Try me.”
I suck in a breath. “At first she didn’t want me to say anything to anyone about us dating,” I begin, and before long I’m spilling the whole story about our secret relationship and Bridget getting jealous over Brittany and the whole Josh thing and then Bridget wanting to go to the dance together even though I’ve kind of agreed to go with Brittany even though I didn’t really want to at first.
Mum listens to me without interrupting, and when I’m finished, she says, “That is complicated.”
“Told you,” I say.
“So do you like this Brittany you’re going to the dance with?”
“She’s okay,” I say.
“And you still like Bridget?”
I nod.
“You know what I think you should do?”
“What?” I ask, hopeful that Mum’s got a magic solution for the mess I’m in.
“Go to the dance tomorrow night and have fun, regardless of who you go with.”
“So I should go with Brittany, even though I don’t like her in that way?”
“It’s just a dance, Quinn. You haven’t mislead her to believe she’s your girlfriend or anything have you?”
“No.” At least I don’t think so.
“Then just make sure she knows you’re just friends. No matter what happens, you should never lead a girl on, even if it’s to make someone else jealous.”
“That’s not what I was doing,” I say defensively.
Mum raises an eyebrow but doesn’t respond. She pats my leg again and stands up. She heads to the door and as she walks out of my room she turns and says, “And tell Luke. He’s your best friend. He deserves to know.”
“I know. Thanks, Mum.”
She smiles. “Downstairs in five. Dinner’s almost ready.”
Mum’s right. I’ll call Luke after dinner and tell him everything.
SEVEN
Luke was cool about the whole Bridget thing and when he told me he’d guessed what was going on, I was shocked. Not as shocked as when he told me Brittany was a set up though. Apparently they have drama class together and Luke roped her in last year to pretend to
be interested in me. It started off as him trying to get me to be more outgoing and get up the courage to ask a girl out. Then when he figured out something was going on between Bridget and me, and I didn’t confide in him about it, he ramped it up to make me confess everything. It didn’t work. He said he was impressed with how long I held out for.
I was angry at him at first for playing with my emotions like that, but I know his heart was in the right place. We had a long talk about how I feel about Bridget and he put a few things in perspective for me. He made me realise that it was a little easier for me being out and proud, especially since I have such great support with him and Mum. Bridget may not have that and I really should have considered that before I came down so hard on her for lying to me and to everyone else. I was part of that lie too, sneaking around with Bridget behind everyone’s back and not confiding in the people who cared about me the most.
I wasn’t expecting Brittany to do anything on Friday at school, since Luke had called her to tell her I knew about the joke, but it turned out she couldn’t cancel her final Valentine’s surprise. As I stand in the middle of the hallway, a dancing gorilla in front of me singing ‘You Are My Sunshine’, I look over to where Brittany is standing with Luke. She mouths, “I’m so sorry” and I can’t help but laugh. When the gorilla is done, he hands me a box of chocolates. He gets cheers and claps from everyone who watched and takes a bow before leaving. I spot Bridget in the crowd and she looks sad. She turns and walks away and I try to chase after her but the bell rings and I lose her in the chaos of everyone making their way to class. I really should talk to her, even if it’s to tell her that the whole Brittany thing was a set up.
I catch up with Luke and Brittany at lunch, but haven’t seen Bridget since this morning. The school is still buzzing about the gorilla-gram and random people keep wanting to high-five me and Brittany wherever we go.
“I’m so sorry,” Brit says. “It was way too late to cancel him.”
“It was fun,” I admit. “No-one’s ever done anything like that for me before.”
“Really?” Brittany asks.
“I have,” Luke says.
“When?” I ask, racking my brain trying to remember Luke doing anything remotely embarrassing like that.
“I wore a gorilla suit for your tenth birthday party. It was dress up, remember?”
I laugh. “Yeah but you didn’t sing to me.”
“No, but I did manage to eat ten chocolate crackles, four hot dogs and a couple of pieces of fairy bread without taking off the mask.”
“Yeah but you did have to drink through a straw,” I reply.
Brittany laughs. “That’s impressive.”
“I’ll tell you what’s impressive,” I say. “Your acting.”
Luke nods. “That’s why Brit’s an A student in drama.” He claps her on the shoulder. “We should see if Hanson will give you extra credit.”
Brittany waves him off. “It was fun, but I’m sorry I duped you, Quinn.”
I shrug. “It’s okay. It was all Luke’s fault anyway.”
“That’s what you get for keeping your best mate out of the loop,” Luke says, pointing his half-eaten sandwich at me.
“Just out of curiosity though, Brit, what would you have done if I’d really fallen for you?”
Brittany raises an eyebrow. “Maybe I wouldn’t have been acting.”
I narrow my eyes. “Are you flirting with me?”
Brit laughs. “You never can tell when the acting ends.” She winks and bites into her apple.
“Hey,” Luke says. “Have you had a chance to talk to Bridget yet?”
I shake my head. “We don’t have any classes together today, and I haven’t been able to track her down.”
“Oh,” Brittany says, swallowing a mouthful of food. “She went home after geography this morning. Said she wasn’t feeling well.”
“Did she tell you that?”
“No, but I heard her tell Mr Johnson after class she was going to the office to call her brother to pick her up.”
“She obviously doesn’t want to see me,” I say.
“I could talk to her,” Brittany offers. “Explain that I was just acting.”
“It’s okay,” I reply.
“Hey, cheer up,” Luke says. “It’s not the end of the world. You’ll run into her again sometime, right?”
“I guess.” I pick at the rest of my lunch. I’m kind of glad I won’t run into her today. I haven’t really worked out what I’ll say to her.
“Oh, I forgot to tell you,” Luke says. “Brit’s still coming to the dance with us tomorrow night, is that okay?”
I smile. “Of course.” I’m not sure I’ll be the best of company so I’m happy for Luke to go with Brit, if that’s what he wants.
EIGHT
The doorbell rings, and Mum rushes to answer it. Luke arriving via the front door was his idea, just for Mum. He turns up with a bunch of flowers for her which of course she fawns over.
“Oh Luke, you’re so handsome,” she gushes, adjusting his tie.
“Thank you Mrs B,’ Luke says. He steps aside and reveals Brittany, who looks amazing with her hair pulled back and a simple yellow dress. “Mrs B, this is Brittany. She’s a friend of ours from school.”
“Hi, Brittany,” Mum says, looking sideways at me. I just smile in return.
“Brit’s coming with Luke and I as friends,” I explain, hoping Mum picks up the emphasis on ‘friends’.
“Okay,” Mum replies, but I don’t think she gets it.
“Wow. You look great Quinn.” Luke grins at me.
“Very smart,” Brittany agrees. “I’m so glad you both went with the bow ties. You look so cute.”
Mum hugs me and motions Luke and Brittany inside so she can get some photos. After she clicks and checks each one on her camera, Luke asks if she’d like him to take one of her and I together. She hands him the camera and stands beside me. She puts her arms around my waist and I hug her back.
“It’s just a dance, Mum,” I tell her.
Mum waves me away. “I’m just practising for the formal,” she says as she gives me a squeeze. I kiss her on the cheek. Luke takes a few photos and then hands the camera back.
“You’ve got your ticket and your money?” Mum asks.
I shove my hands into my pockets and pull out my wallet, but I can’t find my ticket.
“You haven’t lost your ticket?” Luke asks. “You’re not getting out of it now.”
“It’s in my room. I’ll be back in a sec.” I hurry up the hallway to my room and grab the ticket from my bedside table. I turn out the light and the ceiling catches my attention. For the first time in a long time, the glow-in-the-dark stars are lighting up. I smile to myself and wonder if it’s a sign from the universe. I race back down the hallway brandishing my ticket to prove to Luke that I haven’t lost it. “See? I’m not trying to get out of it.”
“Come on then, before you change your mind. I won’t keep her out too late,” Luke says to Mum.
“Nonsense!” Mum replies “Go out and have fun.”
Luke, Brit and I run down the front steps and wave to Mum as we get into his dad’s car. He opens the front passenger door for Brittany and the back door for me. “My ladies,” he says in a terrible fake English accent.
Brittany turns in her seat to look at me. “I hope you get to work things out with Bridget.”
“Oh. Thanks.”
“If you don’t though…” She trails off and winks at me.
“Ready?” Luke asks as he slides into the driver’s seat
“Let’s go!” Brittany says excitedly as Luke pulls out of the drive way.
NINE
We hand our tickets to Mrs Kirkman at the door. She’s dressed in a fairy costume and she’s blessing everyone who enters with ‘love and happiness’. When she gets to Luke, she looks at Brit and I on either side of him and says, “I think you’ve got way too much love already, Luke.”
Luke laughs, and we head insi
de to the canteen, where we buy drinks from Mr Johnson, who’s dressed as a cupid, complete with bow and arrow slung over his back. “Raspberry Sherbet punch,” he says, handing us plastic cups full of pink fizzy liquid. “Not spiked,” he adds, his eyes narrowed.
“Yet,” Luke jokes as we walk away.
Luke takes a drink of his punch and pulls a face. “Ugh! That’s way too sweet.”
Brittany takes his cup. “I love it,” she says, drinking hers in one go and then starting on Luke’s.
I take a sip and almost sneeze when the bubbles go up my nose. We find a table and sit down, and I start scanning the room.
“She’ll be here,” Luke says in my ear. He has to yell over the music.
I just smile and nod in reply, but I keep looking. The dark lighting near the front of the stage makes it hard to distinguish people but I don’t see Bridget anywhere. Maybe she was really sick yesterday. Maybe she’s just not coming. My heart catches in my throat when Josh walks in, but he’s with some other girl I don’t know, and not Bridget.
Luke stands up and sticks out his hands. “Come on,” he says. “I’m not having you mope around all night.”
Brittany takes one of his hands and I take the other one and let him drag me to the dance floor. He’s right. I may as well enjoy myself while I’m here.
After a couple of hours and no sign of Bridget, I pull Luke aside. “I think I might go home.”
“What?” Luke says. “No, you can’t go yet. There’s heaps of time left.”
“If she’s not here yet, she’s not coming,” I say. Luke pulls a sad face. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m okay, I promise.” It’s only a little lie. To be honest, I’m over seeing couples ducking in and out of the kissing booth and the photo booth. I so wanted that to be me and Bridget.
“At least let me take you home,” Luke says.
I shrug. “Whatever you want. I’ll wait outside.”
“Okay,” he says. “I’ll go tell Brittany. Be back in a sec.”
I wander outside and drop down onto a seat beside the hall. Despite not getting to see Bridget tonight, I’m glad I didn’t mope around at home. I got to see Luke enjoying himself with Brittany, which was interesting. I think he must have spent so much time cooking up their big plan for me that they might actually like each other. I make a mental note to grill him about it on the way home.