“You have one minute to explain yourself.” Her jaw ached from gritting her teeth but it was that or smack Jensen. She’d never hit him before but today she might make an exception.
Face pale, Jensen held his hands up in a sign of surrender. “I can explain but please keep your voice down. Amelia doesn’t know about any of this.”
Mind reeling, she tried to make sense of what she’d learned today. She pressed a hand to her forehead and fought back the tears of betrayal. She’d thought her relationship with Jensen was better than this.
“Another person you supposedly care about but have been lying to?”
Sarcasm dripped from her tone and she didn’t give a shit. She was tired of finding out what liars everyone around her was. These days the only people she could depend on were her new friends. And Ellis. Especially Ellis.
As if by magic he appeared in the entryway. “I think she’s beginning to figure it out based on our reactions to seeing you, Jensen. You might want to go talk to your girlfriend. She’s pretty upset right now.”
Brushing past her, Jensen hurried into the living room leaving Ellis and Peyton behind. Her knees wanted to buckle underneath her and for once in her life she didn’t hesitate or ponder too long. Instead, she went right to Ellis and leaned against him, needing his strength desperately. His arms went around her and she laid her head on his chest, feeling his steady heartbeat under her ear.
“This is a nightmare,” she whispered. “He knew all along. My family is a joke.”
“I’d like to argue that.”
“But you can’t,” Peyton finished for him. “I don’t think an explanation exists that can make this okay.”
His roughened hands were gentle as he ran them up and down her spine in a motion meant to soothe. “No, there isn’t but remember you get to choose how you react to all of this, princess. You’re in control.”
“It doesn’t feel like it. It feels like Evandria is just playing with us like a cat with a mouse before he shreds it with his claws.”
Ellis lifted her chin so she was looking into his eyes. “Don’t give them any more power.”
“Actually I feel more powerful since finding out Greg’s secrets. It was before that I felt powerless. I don’t know if that makes any sense.”
“It doesn’t have to.” He glanced over his shoulder into the living room. “How about we go for a walk, maybe get something to eat, while those two love birds talk. I don’t think that’s a conversation that’s going to move quickly.”
She was too angry to eat but she was also too mad to speak to her brother. Thinking straight was a requirement these days and she didn’t have the luxury of being scatterbrained when questioning Jensen. Obviously he knew more – much more – than he’d let on.
“Can you tell him we’re leaving? If I go in there I’ll do something I regret.”
Ellis let his arms drop from around her as he stepped back, and she immediately felt the loss of his warmth and strength. He didn’t have to say a word, just having him there was more than enough.
“I’ll tell him but I want to kick his ass too.”
He was going to have to wait in line.
Chapter Eight
Peyton’s appetite was better than she’d thought. She had eaten most of her spaghetti Bolognese along with a glass and a half of wine that had mellowed her mood. No longer angry, now she was simply sad. Once more, everything she thought was true turned out to be a lie. This was becoming a bad habit.
“It’s okay to be angry,” Ellis prompted. “You deserve to be furious. He’ll ask for you to forgive him but you don’t have to.”
She’d thought about that but had come to few conclusions. “Forgiveness isn’t possible at the moment, but maybe sometime in the future. Nothing he can say makes this alright. But we both know he’s going to give us some babble about Evandria’s mission and how it’s bigger than the individual. We’ve heard it all before just from other people.”
Ellis checked his phone. “Are you ready to hear him out? I told him where we were and he said he can be here in a few minutes to talk. I can tell him you’re not ready if you want me to.”
She shook her head. “No, I don’t want to drag this out. I’ll hear what he has to say and get it over with.”
“You’re a hell of a lot nicer than I would be under these circumstances.”
The image of Ellis dealing with dishonest family members almost brought a smile to her face. He didn’t even have patience to deal with bad drivers.
“I’m angered out. I’m tired of being pissed off. I’ve been in such a heightened state of emotion for so long I can’t keep up that sort of intensity forever.” But it was more than that and it was time she admitted to it. “The fact is I’m not angry at Greg anymore. I’d have to care to be that mad and I don’t. It sounds cold but any love I had for him, he’d killed long before he died. I cared about him as a person all these years but recent events have left me cold. Nothing I do will change what happened in the past nor how Greg handled it. He’s not my husband anymore and when I see what he built with Amelia I doubt he ever really was. He was the man that my father wanted me to marry. His family wanted him to marry me too. We were a means to an end. It’s hard to stay furious at someone when it feels like they’re part of another life.”
His brows went up and he opened his mouth to speak but no words came out. She’d apparently rendered him speechless.
I’ll write this day down in my calendar.
“What’s wrong?” she asked, watching his expression close up and his gaze drop down to his empty plate.
“It’s nothing. We should talk about what questions you want to ask Jensen.”
Ellis was a cool liar when he needed to be but after spending so much time with him she could see when he was bothered by something. “It’s something. Talk to me.”
He looked up, his blue eyes almost black with emotion. “If you don’t love him anymore, then why…?”
His voice trailed off but he didn’t need to finish the sentence for her to know what he was talking about. The elephant in the room that she’d been avoiding since she’d woken up.
Them. Him.
“When you aren’t sure about your past, it’s hard to plan your future.”
His gaze scrutinized her so closely she wanted to crawl under the table and hide. Ellis saw everything, and he wouldn’t let her hide from the truth.
“I would imagine it would be even harder to avoid it.” He leaned forward and captured her hand with his, their fingers tangling together. No other man’s touch had ever felt so good and right, the tingling running up her arm and straight to her abdomen. “Your future is happening as we speak, princess. If you don’t want me, that’s fine. I’m a big boy and I’ll survive. But if you’re waiting on some sign from the universe, you might be waiting for awhile. In the meantime, your life is passing you by and I can assure you with absolutely no doubt in my mind that tomorrow isn’t a guarantee.”
It had come down to this. They’d been dancing around this topic for days now, the awareness between them growing stronger with each passing moment. She’d hoped to dodge this conversation for a little longer, knowing she’d have to tell him the truth. He deserved no less and she wouldn’t disrespect all his sacrifice with a lie.
It was there on the tip of her tongue, the words she needed to say but that she didn’t want him to hear. Time seemed to stand still as he waited for her reply, giving her no quarter to evade him. Endless patience, that’s what Ellis Hunter had. How many suspects had he broken under this interrogation technique? Too many to count. He was a professional and she was an amateur when it came to subterfuge. The only person that had ever believed her lies was herself, and she’d fallen hook, line, and sinker.
“I’m scared.”
Her voice sounded rusty and unused but that was simply the lump that had grown in her throat as she’d contemplated her few options. Lies and truth. Truth and lies. She couldn’t tell even the smallest fib to this man,
but that’s what made him different than anyone else she’d ever met.
Her authenticity must have pleased him because he lifted her hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to the knuckles, sending a million butterflies free in her stomach. No one had ever done that to her before and once wasn’t going to be enough.
“Can you tell me what you’re scared of? Is it me?”
Shaking her head, she sought the right answer in her muddled brain. “No. Yes. Kind of. I’m scared of the way you make me feel.”
“How do I make you feel?”
His voice was soft, low, and cajoling as if she was a bird on the windowsill he didn’t want to fly away.
She couldn’t hold back the first word that came to mind. “Weak.”
His mouth went slack and she wished she could take her answer back but it was far too late.
“Weak,” he repeated, his features bleak. “I guess I would be afraid too if you made me feel that way.”
She had no right to ask but…
“How do I make you feel?”
His gaze raked her up and down, sending a zing of electricity to every molecule in her body. He didn’t try and hide the fact that he liked what he saw.
“Happy.”
This from the grouchy detective she’d met that first day. The man that never seemed happy about anything was happy because of her.
“That’s…good.”
He shrugged and signaled the waitress. “Depends on how you look at it. I’ve never found much usefulness in the emotion but I can’t deny how you make me feel.”
“It’s good to be happy, Ellis.”
“Is it? It changes nothing except your mood. It doesn’t accomplish anything. Lots of productive people in the world weren’t happy. It’s not a requirement.”
He was defensive now because of what she’d said. “I need to explain what I said–”
“You owe me nothing,” he cut in, not letting her finish. “Not a thing. If I make you feel weak, then I do. No explanations necessary. Now let’s get ready because your brother just walked into the restaurant.”
Jensen was striding across the room, determination written across his face. He’d had time to think about what he wanted to say so she was surely in for an earful of excuses.
She had a few things to say as well.
Chapter Nine
Jensen was full of excuses, clearly not wanting to take responsibility for his decisions and actions. Ellis didn’t have any respect for people like that.
“I didn’t know until after Greg died,” Jensen pleaded for his sister’s understanding as they sat in a quiet corner of the restaurant. “It didn’t seem the right time to tell you.”
Peyton’s normally sedate blue eyes were full of fire. “It’s been five years. Are you trying to say that you couldn’t find the balls to tell me the truth for all that time? That’s pathetic.”
“Now wait a minute,” Jensen sputtered, his cheeks turning red. “I was trying to protect you.”
Ellis couldn’t keep his damn mouth shut. “Get real. You were protecting yourself.”
Swinging his attention from his sister, Jensen turning his frustration onto Ellis. “Can you keep out of this? This is a family matter.”
The young millionaire had pulled the family card. Predictable.
Peyton didn’t give Ellis a moment to reply.
“It became his business the minute he put his life on the line for me.” Peyton shook her finger at her brother, clearly incensed. “He’s been more loyal than my own family. You’ve been lying to me for years. What else do I not know about? Am I adopted too? Because that would explain a whole hell of a lot in my life.”
Jensen’s fingers tightened around the cloth napkin that was sitting on the table. “You are not adopted although I’m sure you wish you were. Sorry, sis, you’re one of us. Now will you let me explain?”
“Don’t you mean make excuses?” Peyton rolled her eyes. “That’s all I’ve heard from your lips since you got here. Lousy fucking excuses.”
“I didn’t want to add to your grief. You were even more adrift after Greg died than before. What if I told you and you did something drastic? I couldn’t have that on my conscience.”
“So this was about you?” she scoffed. “I knew it. I asked our parents and they said they didn’t know but I suppose that’s a lie too. The question isn’t if they know but how long have they known?”
Scraping a hand down his face, Jensen shook his head. “I honestly don’t know if they know or knew before. I definitely don’t think Mother did. She hates Evandria and doesn’t want anything to do with them, but Father might have known at some point. He’s been an officer for the organization and he would have had access to the files. He’s never said anything to me one way or another. We don’t discuss Evandria business but he does go to meetings.”
Ellis’s ears perked up. “He does? He said he’d never heard of Arsenal but if he was an officer he definitely would have, correct? He had to have known Greg was a member.”
Jensen hemmed and hawed, obviously not wanting to implicate his father but it was too late. The senior McMillen was a total asshole and a shitty parent.
“Probably,” he finally admitted with a sigh. “Arsenal isn’t well-known among the membership but to the officers it would be. As for knowing who is a part of that division, maybe not. That sort of list wouldn’t be common knowledge.”
“I didn’t think Dad was an officer anymore.”
“He’s not but as a longtime member and former officer there are some perks.”
Leaning forward, Ellis looked Jensen straight in the eyes. He wanted a truthful fucking answer. “Are you in Arsenal?”
“No.” The other man shook his head and shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “I’m not, I swear.”
Ellis didn’t let up on Peyton’s brother. “Did you help kill Greg?”
Jensen reared up in indignation. “Hell, no. I liked Greg. He was a nice guy.”
“Then why was your name brought up on a recording between two of the men responsible for his death?”
Hand trembling, Jensen shook his head. “It was some other Jensen. I swear I don’t know them.”
“They said that you would take care of me if I wanted to go to the restaurant that day. Did you know they were going to kill Greg?”
Tugging at his collar, her brother was clearly agitated. “No!”
Heads turned in the dining room and Jensen lowered his voice. “No, I didn’t have anything to do with it. I don’t know who would have been talking about me.”
Ellis really hated Peyton’s brother at this moment. “So if you aren’t in Arsenal and you weren’t part of Greg’s murder then why were you tasked with going to see Greg’s other wife and giving her some bogus insurance settlement? It kind of sounds like Evandria wanted you to tell Peyton.”
Jensen shrugged. “When I was asked I didn’t know the whole story. Then after I said yes, it seemed like an innocuous request, they gave me the rest of the details. I did ask them why me, and they said that they thought I would be sensitive to the delicacy of the information. Better to keep it in the family than let someone who wasn’t related do it. It seemed like a good idea.”
It was a lousy idea and Evandria was playing God again, pushing people around like pawns on a chess board. They had to control every goddamn thing but the weather, and Ellis would wager they were working on that.
“And then you started dating her.”
Peyton’s tone was bitter and Jensen winced at her words.
“It didn’t start out like that. She was so sad and alone and I just wanted to make sure she was okay. I’d come around and visit every now and then. We were friends really, and then it grew into more. I really love her and I want to marry her.”
She took a gulp of her wine. “How romantic. Congratulations on your future together. Or is she mad at you too? It didn’t sound like she was taking the news very well when we left.”
Her brother’s throat bobbed and he
rubbed the back of his neck. “I think everything is okay now. She says she understands why I didn’t tell her.”
“Then she understands more than I do,” Peyton said bitterly. “So far you’ve given the world’s worst excuses and it all comes down to you being a pussy and trying to save your own skin. You were the one person in our family that I thought I could trust, and now I know that you’ve been lying to me and her for years. I don’t trust you, I don’t respect you, and I’m not even sure I want to be your sister right now. Maybe I’ll get over this eventually but your duplicity makes me sick.”
Ellis was so fucking proud of the way Peyton stood up for herself he almost applauded. Jensen looked ill, his skin a greenish-gray and his eyes bright with tears. Some might call her statements over the top but it didn’t look like Jensen had ever had to deal with the consequences of his actions before. This was a good life lesson.
If you act like a shit, people aren’t going to like you very much.
“I can only say I’m sorry,” he mumbled, looking down at his hands in his lap. “I’ve messed up and I don’t know how to fix it.”
Reaching under the table, Ellis placed his hand on Peyton’s thigh, giving it a squeeze to let her know he was there for her no matter what. Some of the tension underneath his palm relaxed away and she sighed, placing her own hand on top of his.
Drained of energy and anger, Peyton appeared to have run out of gas. She slumped in her chair, her lips pressed together and deliberately not looking at her asshole brother. It was time for Ellis to step into the questioning.
“Do you know Grant Hollister? And try to tell the truth this time.”
Fidgeting in his chair, Jensen nodded. “I know him. He’s considered to be up and coming for an officer position.”
“Did you know he was Alex Vaughn’s half-brother?”
Jensen’s head jerked up. “I didn’t. Are you sure?”
“Quite sure. Now tell me what you know of Evandria now that Archer Caldwell has been placed in custody. What’s going on as far as a power struggle? Do you know who will take his place? Will it be Nigel Holmwood?”
Kiss Midnight Goodbye (Midnight Blue Beach Book 3) Page 6