Guiding Lights

by Jessica Florence

  I got a little down after admitting I never thought about what I wanted to do with my life. I wondered what I would be good at. Wolfe changed the subject and brought another smile to my lips. He also swept me up into his arms and threatened to throw me into the cold pools if I didn’t cheer up. I changed my mood right then and there. Hell no, I was not going into that water.

  We stayed by the pools and chatted for another hour before taking the long trail back to his truck.

  This weekend had some rocky moments but it was turning out to be the best weekend of my life so far. Wolfe had changed everything. I still wondered where we were heading, but I didn’t put any of my fears into them. We would be together. He said it himself, if I needed to run, he would run with me.

  We drove back to Portree and made our way back to the games. I slipped off my seat belt and jumped from my seat onto Wolfe’s lap.

  “I’m becoming addicted to you.” I had so many thoughts and each one had him in it. I leaned in and pressed my lips to his.

  “Ah have that effect on women,” he teased and I started to pull back, pretending to be mad at him. His head fell back and he laughed. His arms gripped me and kept my body pinned to his.

  “Ye have been mah addiction since mah eyes found yers for the first time. Ah knew right then ye were mine. Just had tae make ye see it.” He kissed me and I gave in. I heated things up slightly by pushing my tongue into his mouth and taking the initiative. His growl made me want to do dirty things with him in his truck, but not in a parking lot where there were lots of people.

  “We should probably get out of the truck.” I giggled while pulling back and moving over to my side of the truck. He adjusted himself and I refrained from laughing even harder. Poor Wolfe. I took pity on him and we sat there for another five minutes so his cock could calm down.

  He pulled his hat back on as soon as we exited the truck; I was going to make it my life’s mission to burn that fucker as soon as I could.

  We waded through the crowds together until we found a little space by the caber toss area. After the first competitor threw his log, I looked around and noticed there seemed to be more people hanging around this event. We watched them for a few more minutes before I got the urge to pee.

  “Wolfe, I gotta pee.” I mumbled so no one around would hear me. He nodded and led the way through the crowd so I could go to the bathroom. They had set up little porta potties in a line along the trees edge and thankfully there wasn’t a wait. I did my business and used the hand sanitizer that was sitting on a chair outside of them.

  “Better?” he teased and I just rolled my eyes. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed me sweetly.

  “Love ye,” he whispered.

  “Love you,” I whispered back. He interlaced my fingers with his and we walked off toward another competition.

  “There he is!” someone yelled behind us. I felt Wolfe’s hand tighten, but paid no attention to it. That’s when everything went very wrong. A crowd of people swarmed us, and most of them had cameras.

  “Wolfe! Where have you been the past two months? Have you been in rehab?” someone shouted. I tried to shield myself from their cameras, but there were too many of them.

  “Wolfe! Who is the lady? Is it serious?” a woman asked and I found myself having an out of body experience. What they hell was going on?

  “Oh my god It’s Wolfe Lennox!” Some strange woman joined in on the crowd trying to touch Wolfe.

  I looked up at him and his face said it all. He had a big secret he’d been keeping from me, and now he was scared I would leave.

  “Miss. How does it feel to be dating a rock star?” My mouth dropped at the man’s question, and Wolfe snapped to attention. He said no comment to everyone and as quickly as possible, led me back to his truck. I was in shock.

  “What did that man mean by rock star?” The all too familiar panic was starting to claw its way out of the depths on my mind. He ran his fingers down his face in frustration.

  “Wolfe. What’s going on?” I pleaded.

  “I’m a famous singer.”

  “When you say famous singer? Do you mean like famous around here or Elvis famous?” My voice was shaky. I stared at him, waiting for him to answer me. The same group of people surrounded the truck and took pictures. Wolfe snapped into action and slowly, without injuring anyone, left the parking lot and headed to the cabin.

  “Wolfe?” I need to know his answer.

  “Christ, I’m sorry, Nera, Ah wanted tae tell ye, but Ah liked the way ye looked at me. Not as Wolfe Lennox, rock star, but as Wolfe Lennox, just a normal man.” He sounded desperate for me to understand, and in way, I did, but he should have trusted me. I wouldn’t have cared either way.

  “Wolfe, answer my question,” I demanded.

  “Elvis famous.” Shit, he was fucking world famous. Not just Scottish famous. Shit, shit. I felt the panic claw at me; I wanted to run. I couldn’t be around that sort of attention. He was probably constantly in the limelight, and I need the shadows. My stepparents could find me if they saw me in any pictures.

  Suddenly, my body froze as the realization hit me. I’d have to leave. I was going to be plastered everywhere in those pictures. They would find me. As soon as he slammed the truck into park, I flew out the door, fell to the ground, and lost my breakfast. Wolfe’s hands were in my hair, holding it up as I puked. Oh god, I felt so scared and sick. As soon as I was done, Wolfe scooped me up in his arms and carried me inside, set me on the couch, and went to get a glass of water.

  The cold water helped ease my sickness, but I was still freaking out. I looked at him and knew I needed to calm down. I didn’t want to leave him; I needed to find out everything and figure a way to make this work.

  “I need you to tell me everything, Wolfe, no more secrets.”

  Chapter Twenty Eight

  “In 2008, Ah had my big break at a local pub in Glasgow. From there on, Ah was swept up into live tours and talk shows. Ah have even had a guest appearance in a few movies. Ah had a great life, and Alexis was by my side. But she couldn’t handle it, and well, ye know the rest. That was a year ago, in August. Ah tried tae keep mah shit together for my fans, but Ah lost control. Drugs, women, Ah would get intae fights with people at the bar for the thrill of it. The pain helped numb me.”

  He looked down at his hands and took some steady breaths.“Mah maw found me on the floor of my house, women everywhere, and said enough was enough. She got me in rehab; she made me whole again. But Ah just felt incomplete, Ah didn’t know where Ah wanted tae go, or if Ah even wanted tae sing anymore.” His eyes lifted to mine and I felt his hope.

  “Evan was a friend of the family, he told mah maw Ah could come stay for a while and find myself. Sounded good. But then Ah met ye. Yer tough skin did nothing tae hide the sadness in yer eyes and Ah knew no one could understand me but ye. Ye didn’t recognize me; ye just treated me like a normal man. Ye even resisted me, and fought wanting me. Ah have never had that, and it was refreshing as hell. I’m sorry, Ah should have said something. But Ah was scared ye would leave. Ye would run because it was tae much for ye.”

  My heart clenched for him, I understood his reasons for not telling me.

  “I’m not leaving, I’m not running. But I do have problem.” His eyebrows scrunched in confusion.

  “I can’t be in the limelight. My stepparents took my leaving as a challenge, a game for them to compete in. They and whatever suitor they have found for me have been trying to find me since I left. It’s why I run. If I don’t stay somewhere for too long, they can’t find me. You being in the public eye like you are will put me out there too. I can’t live in fear that they are going to get me.” Tears started to fall. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do.

  “Nera, Ah will keep ye safe. No matter what, yer mine remember. Ah will always be there for ye. Ah love ye.” He took hold of my hand in comfort, trying to get me to see his way. But I needed to take a moment for myself. I needed to breathe, and Wolfe had a way of sweeping
me into his whirlwind, not giving me time to think.

  “I’m gonna go for a walk. I’m not running; I just need to think.” I leaned in and kissed him. He held tight and kissed me harder. Almost like he was afraid he would never feel my kiss again. I let myself sink into his kiss and forget about everything. My hands wrapped themselves in his hair and pulled him closer.

  Once I felt those little tingles in my toes, I knew it was time to pull back.

  “I’m just going for a walk,” I whispered.

  I looked into his honey eyes one more time and got off him. He looked a little nervous, but gave me a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

  “I’ll be back,” I told him and walked out the door. Either way, I would be back. Whether it was to tell him I wanted to wait until news died down and keep me out of future incidents, or to tell him goodbye, I wasn’t sure. I walked along the long driveway thinking over my options and feelings.

  If he was as famous as he said, he probably could keep me safe, hire bodyguards and such. I would have to suck up my pride and let him take care of it. There was another option: us going our separate ways for a few weeks. Letting everyone forget about the mysterious girl Wolfe Lennox was with, but honestly I didn’t want to be away from him that long. As big in the world as appeared to be, he wouldn’t be able to hide from the cameras that long. I was surprised no one had recognized him at the pub.

  Flashbacks of him and his hat came back to me. It started to make sense. He’d worn the glasses and the hat at the pub when the tourists came in. He didn’t want to be recognized. The man he bought the necklace from had asked for his signature. God, I was a dummy. I thought he wanted to just keep track of what he’d sold and who had bought it, but he got it from his granddaughter. I really should have paid more attention to the world around me. If only I’d heard him on the radio once, I would have remembered his voice anywhere.

  I looked down and touched my necklace. If I’d met Wolfe knowing he was a rock star, would I have given him the chance? Deep down, I knew the answer to that. No. I would have made sure I was as far away from him as possible. The way we’d met and everything after that felt right.

  He’d taken my heart without asking, and he wouldn’t let me run.

  He’d given me the necklace as a symbol of our love. I couldn’t be afraid anymore. Not after everything I had been through. A thought struck me and I had to laugh. Only I would fall for a rock god and not know who he was. With resolve in my heart, I made it to the road and turned around. I was headed back to Wolfe; we would figure this out together. We would do anything together.

  “Good to see you, Monera.” That voice. Time stopped, my body froze. All memories of my past came flooding in like a tidal wave. I turned very slowly and felt myself die a little on the inside. My stepparents where standing there, looking the same as they had seven years ago. Only this time they had victory smiles on their faces. They’d brought three men in combat outfits and camouflage with. I was surrounded. They had won.

  “How did you find me?” I said with a surprisingly strong voice. I didn’t want to be the scared teenager they had taken advantage of. I was older, and I was a survivor.

  “We found you a month ago. Someone took a picture of your famous lover, and you were there in the corner. We figured this was a perfect time to come retrieve you. Once you’d found happiness,” she sneered. I bit the inside of my cheek very hard to keep from mouthing off at her.

  “So what now?”

  “You come with us. Quietly. Things go back to the way they were. Someone is very interested in you and wants your hand in marriage. He is willing to pay us a lot of money for you, and I’ve grown tired of your games, Monera. You will do as you were meant to.” Her voice was flat. I lifted my chin, and watched surprise grow in her eyes.

  “And if I don’t go quietly?” I might not win if I fought against them, but at least I could scream and try. My stepfather stepped forward and smiled.

  “Then these men,” he gestured to the three men. “They will go to that cabin and shoot your boyfriend.” And just like that, they had me. I wouldn’t do anything that could possibly harm Wolfe. I nodded, and their victory smiles returned.

  “Let’s go, Monera.” They turned and I needed to think, to figure out something I could do to let Wolfe know I hadn’t run. I hated that he would think that, but I knew he would. When I didn’t make it back to the cabin, he would assume I’d run.

  An idea hit me like lightning, and I immediately grabbed the necklace that Wolfe had given me and started taking off my bra under my shirt.

  “Monera, what are you doing?” Mother asked impatiently.

  Once I had slipped it off, I put the necklace inside the cup discreetly and tossed it to the ground.

  “I remember the rules, Mother, no bras.” I prayed that this would work. I held my breath and waited for her to say something.

  “Good, you remembered. We wouldn’t want your soon-to-be husband seeing the whore that you are wearing those monstrosities.”

  When Wolfe found my bra with my necklace, he would know I hadn’t run. He would know. Somehow he would find me; I just needed to have faith.

  Chapter Twenty Nine

  I missed Wolfe. After we had all loaded into a van, the three large men escorted us to the airport and then on to Morocco. I hadn’t let my stepparents get to me, and they were silent for the most part. Probably basking in their win at my capture.

  I tried to fall asleep on the plane, but every time I would doze off, Mother would stop me. The flight was long, and we had one stop in Spain. I thought about making a run for it, but I was scared that they might go back and do something to Wolfe. So I stayed put, doing everything they said, until we were finally off the plane and in the car. Heading home. Except it wasn’t the home I had grown up in.

  The car pulled into the driveway of a rather large home with a fence surrounding it. My confusion was probably written on my face because my mother decided to brag about it.

  “Yes, it is rather nice, isn’t it? Turns out you were good for something; your future husband spared no expense to win us over. He really didn’t need to do that; we would have sold you for a far less. But why not milk it.” She beamed. I took a deep breath and let her comment pass over me. I wasn’t going to let them get to me this time. I was stronger, and I would make it out of this again, hopefully unmarried.

  We got out of the car onto the smooth pavement and I was escorted inside. It was a nice house; I would give them that. But I knew it was just a house, not a home. Nothing made it homey at all. There were no pictures, no blankets, or throws used for sitting and watching TV. Nope, this house was strictly for a show of power.

  “Your future husband will be here for dinner tonight. I want you to wash that filth of a man off you and change out of those clothes. Jason, take Monera to her room, and make sure she doesn’t leave until I come to get her.” With her parting words, she stormed off beyond the living room and through a closed door. The house was just one story, but it was huge. We walked past the living room, just inside the front door, and down the hall. There were four rooms, and mine was apparently the last door on the left.

  Jason, the apparent babysitter, opened the door and nudged me in, not so nicely. But before he could shut it, I whirled around and cursed. “Fuck, you think after everything I have been through, you could be a little nicer?”

  I stared at him and found myself wishing I had never opened my mouth, or taken off my bra earlier. His eyes were staring at me with aggressive desire.

  “I’d shut your mouth, whore, before I stick my dick in it and shut it for you.” He challenged. Mm mouth was water tight, and he closed the door harshly. I turned and looked at the room. They had brought all of my stuff over, and I wanted to puke at the sight.

  I didn’t want to be reminded of the past. They even had the same sheets and comforter on my bed. I would prefer a prison cell to being here— where I could remember lying on that same bed while my stepdad’s nephew touche
d me, leaving me to clean up his mess when he was finished. I was gonna be sick, thankfully, they were nice enough to give me a room with a bathroom attached. I ran for it and barely reached the toilet in time to puke everything I had in my stomach: water and airplane peanuts.

  I lay my face on the cold toilet seat and just took a moment to breathe. I was back in my own hell, where my stepparents could do whatever they wanted with me, and I was to be sold like some common donkey to be someone’s bride. My thoughts drifted back to Wolfe, and I let myself slide down to the cold tile.

  Would he have figured it out? Was he looking for me? I prayed he was. He was the only man I’d ever want to be with. No other would ever compare to him. I yearned for his touch. He would scoop me up and sit with me against the wall. He wouldn’t go anywhere near the bed because he would understand how traumatized I was by it. Wolfe understood me. He knew everything about me, and he still loved me.

  A tear slipped from the corner of my eye and fell to the tile. This would be the only moment I would let myself cry. I had to be strong, but for this moment, as I thought of Wolfe, and how much I wished he was holding me, kissing me, telling me everything was alright. I cried alone in bathroom for a while before deciding it was time. With the image of Wolfe lying on my bed, smiling at me through his beard, I got up and took a shower. I hated that I would be wiping his scent off me, but I needed to pretend to be the obedient daughter for now, make them think I hadn’t changed in all of these years.

  I showered quickly and changed into the clothes that Mother had set out for me: a simple a pair of non-form fitting jeans, a button up white shirt, and sports bra.

  I didn’t know when Mother would come to get me so I lay on the ground and decided I would try to sleep. The ground was hard but it was better than that bed and those memories. It took me a while, but exhaustion finally claimed me.

  Cold water splashing my face startled me awake. I looked up and saw Mother holding a now empty bottle of water over my head.