Jaraels Lioness

by Ja-Rael's Lioness [MF] (lit)

  Relieved, Elise nodded. She was so pale by the time he’d helped into the facilities, he was loath to leave her. Determination was evident in her expression and every line of her body, however, and finally, very reluctantly, he departed and left her in peace. When he heard her at the door again, he opened it, scooped her into his arms and settled her on the bed again. After she’d drank a full tumbler of water, he left her to rest and retreated from the room to wrestle with the demons that had been torturing him in his dreams.

  One thing had become crystal clear to him. He had been criminal in taking Leez from her people--and he had no right to take a mate, at all, let alone Leez, whom he had put in grave danger simply by removing her from all she knew and abandoning her in an unknown place. His duty was to protect her, but as a healer he had an inescapable duty to his patients, as well. When the conflict between his dual obligations had arisen, he had failed his mate and she had nearly died because of it.

  He stared blindly at the darkening landscape beyond the viewing port, wondering which was going to be worse, living with Leez for a whole year, knowing he must take her back--or living without her afterwards.

  Chapter Eighteen

  As much as Elise enjoyed being waited on hand and foot, and fussed over, by the end of the following day she was beginning to chafe at Ja-rael’s determination to keep her in bed. She still felt like hell, but she knew from experience that the only way to regain her strength was to get up and move around. She finally decided she was just going to have to ‘sneak’ or Ja-rael was going to make her stay in bed for the rest of her life.

  The first few trips she made from the bed to the facilities and back, she staggered so much that Ja-rael heard her and came to investigate--and treated her to a tirade on her ‘childishness’. It infuriated her, but his concern was strangely warming, too, particularly since he was behaving so oddly.

  She finally decided he must have figured out what she’d done and he was angry that she’d behaved so stupidly it had almost cost her her life. If true, she supposed it was only to be expected that he’d treat her like a willful, thoughtless child.

  He seemed so uncomfortable around her, though, that she began to wonder after a couple of days if it was guilt that was riding him, if he felt like it was his fault that she’d nearly died of dehydration.

  “It was my own fault, you know,” she said tentatively when he brought her food on the third day after she’d awakened.

  He glanced at her sharply. “Why would you think that?”

  She shook her head and grimaced. “I squandered the water on a shower. I know it was stupid not to check first. I wasn’t thinking.”

  He studied her for several moments. “It would not have been an issue if I had not stayed away so long.”

  Elise frowned. “How long?”

  He rubbed his head. “I don’t know. Days, much longer than I intended. I--I did not sleep much, which made it difficult to track the time.”

  Elise digested that in silence. “Something happened.”

  He shrugged, but his lips tightened in repressed anger. “A patient--spoiled, stupidly willful female. She had taken something to spite her mate for not letting her have her way and nearly died and killed her cub, as well. The cub may not survive anyway. It was forced into the world early by her carelessness.” He paused for several moments. “If you are well enough to travel tomorrow, I need to get back to check on the infant.”

  Elise nodded, but she was too appalled by the story to make any sort of comment. No wonder he hadn’t slept! A niggling of guilt flickered through her. She wondered if she’d sounded accusing when she’d asked him why he’d been gone so long. “Oh,” she managed to say finally. “Uh--I think I can manage. Is it far?”

  She could tell by the way he was looking at her that he was wrestling with some internal debate. “Not far,” he said finally. “I can carry you to my glider.”

  “Glider?” she asked.

  “The vehicles which we use to travel in on Meeri,” he responded shortly, turning to leave.

  He paused in the doorway, looking uncomfortable. “I appreciate it more than I can say that you are too good hearted to blame me for failing you, but I can not so easily dismiss my responsibility.” He sighed gustily, paused hesitantly for several moments and finally spoke again harshly. “I have come to realize that there is no place in my life for a mate. I release you from the promise I forced you to make. I will not expect you to accept me as your mate and I will return you to your people as soon as I can. In the meanwhile, I hope that you will allow me to accept the responsibility of your welfare until I can take you back.”

  Elise was still gaping at the door when he closed it behind him, too stunned to think of anything at all to say. She sat pondering his comments for some time, trying to figure out why she felt like crying and what, exactly, he’d meant. No place for a mate? Did he mean he’d decided she was totally unsuitable? Or was he still feeling guilty about her getting herself into such a fix?

  Most importantly, why did she feel like she’d just been rejected? And why did it bother her so much? She’d intended to go back all along. She’d figured he would see the futility of the situation long before the twin worlds came into proximity again.

  She hadn’t expected him to see it the minute she did something that was, admittedly, one of the stupidest things she’d ever done. She still couldn’t figure out why she hadn’t even thought to check the water supply before she’d taken the notion a bath would make her feel better, but that was beside the point. Perfectly intelligent and responsible people died from stupidity all the time, just because they were distracted and not being as careful as they should be.

  He had a hell of a nerve making that kind of snap judgment about her anyway! She was no fool. She was educated and intelligent and she came from a civilization worlds more advanced than his!

  How dare he imply that she wasn’t good enough for him!

  She knew that was it. He’d gone into the city, looked around at the other cat people and thought about the fact that she was going to be a freak among them and he was too embarrassed by his lapse in judgment to admit he was ashamed to show her, ashamed to claim her.

  The asshole!

  * * * *

  Elise had her first suspicion that she might have judged a little hastily herself when she finally got a look at the glider Ja-rael had spoken of. This was no primitive mode of transportation. She’d more than half suspected the glider was even some sort of domesticated beast of burden and it was startling enough to discover it was actually a machine. It was far more than that, however. It was a beautiful piece of technology. The reddish metal it had been constructed of gleamed brightly in the light of Meeri’s sun. It was as sleek as a bullet and Elise had an uneasy feeling that it would move like one, too.

  She discovered with more than a little dismay that she was right. When they’d strapped themselves in, Ja-rael began to press buttons and levers. A gleaming, metallic solar sail appeared, pulling energy from the sun. Moments later, the small craft rose from the ground. When they reached a level just above the tops of the trees, the craft blasted forward as if it was a stone slung from a sling shot. Nausea threatened to gain control of Elise for several dizzying moments after take off. Finally, she mastered it, soothed the tight knot in her stomach, and peered around her nervously. In the distance, she saw tall, spires and strange, bulbous roofs capped with needle sharp peaks. As they neared the city, she saw a number of other crafts similar to the one she was in zipping back and forth across the airspace above the rooftops.

  “My god!” she breathed with a mixture of awe and disbelief. “It’s … it’s beautiful!”

  Ja-rael flicked a glance at her. “You thought we lived in huts?”

  Elise reddened. She could see from the derisive amusement in Ja-rael’s eyes that she’d given her thoughts away and felt hotter color fill her cheeks. “No,” she lied. “I just never expected anything like this.”

  He didn’t believe the
lie. She didn’t have to look at him to know that much, but her discomfort was leavened with the anger that had kept her silent during the time since he’d spoken to her the day before about taking her home. Whatever she’d thought, she reasoned, he’d done nothing to make her think otherwise. He was attired now in a long, flowing robe and loose legged trousers, but he’d been wearing a loincloth when she’d met him. In hindsight, she supposed that was due to the heat on Tor, and possibly because the Torrines actually were a more primitive race, but he’d had every opportunity to disabuse her mind of her misconceptions when he’d been teaching her his language and customs. He hadn’t made any effort to describe the society he hailed from beyond that.

  They’d crossed the city and neared the outer edge before the craft began to drop toward the ground. It settled with a tooth jarring thump on a neatly trimmed square of greenery, beside a half dozen similar crafts, although most were easily twice the size of the craft Ja-rael flew. As unfamiliar as she was with the vehicle, Elise had the impression that there was more of a difference than the size and suspected, as nice and well maintained as it was, that Ja-rael’s was the economy version.

  The landing clenched an earlier impression she’d had of Ja-rael. He seemed competent enough once airborne, but he was obviously a seat-of-his-pants pilot and landing was definitely not his forte.

  Belatedly, she recalled that she’d sworn he would never get her off the ground again in anything he was flying, but she’d been too pissed off and too surprised at the sight of the vehicle to recall the vow.

  The landing jarred it into her memory.

  Elise was still struggling to climb out on unsteady legs when she noticed that doors and windows had opened in many of the neat domiciles that surrounded the square. Within a few moments, a half a dozen younglings of varying ages tumbled out of the buildings and scampered in their direction like a pack of jubilant puppies. Behind them, parents followed more sedately.

  To Elise’s stunned surprise the younglings, laughing and chattering happily, launched themselves at Ja-rael as if he was some long lost relative. He laughed, catching them against him in affectionate hugs, rubbing a hand over one’s head, patting another on the back. Elise was so transfixed by the laugh that she was scarcely aware of the fact that the adults had halted some distance away to stare at her as if they’d never seen anything like her.

  Which they obviously hadn’t.

  Ja-rael, glancing up from the children, studied Elise for a moment, then looked at his neighbors. His smile faded. Disentangling himself from the youngsters, he moved to stand beside Elise, placing a hand along her waist. “Leez, these are my neighbors,” he said, his expression conveying a brief warning that she found impossible to interpret as he turned and introduced them by name. Most of them simply continued to gape at her. A few managed polite smiles that looked more stunned than welcoming.

  “She is maned,” one of the males said blankly, then turned a deep shade of embarrassment when both Elise and Ja-rael glanced at him. “You said she was beautiful, Ja-rael. You did not tell me she was a maned lioness. Great Minoa! Where did find … I beg your pardon! Please accept my apologies for being so rude.”

  Elise glanced at Ja-rael uncertainly. His hand tightened on her waist. Ever so slightly, he shook his head. “Many sectors from here, beyond the dead lands.”

  The women began to chatter far too fast for Elise, with her limited knowledge of their language, to keep up.

  “No wonder you were away so long!” the male Ja-rael had called Clautz said in amazement. “I had no idea you traveled so far to trap.”

  Ja-rael shrugged. “Much further this last time than ever before.”

  “And the hunt went very well, for you got your bride price, I see.”

  Ja-rael looked uncomfortable, but it was obvious even to Elise that bragging about the value of their mates was expected. “Thirty zihnars.”

  There were gasps of amazement all around. “Truly?” one of the youngsters asked. “You found thirty and you traded them for her?”

  Ja-rael smiled at the small female, patting her head. “Truly.” He squatted down before her. “And I was terrified that it would not be nearly enough.”

  The child giggled and flicked a glance up at Elise. “Because she has the mane?”

  Ja-rael’s smile faded. Giving the young female a pat of affection, he straightened. “Because from the moment I saw her I knew that she was the other half of my soul and that I could not live without her.”

  Chapter Nineteen

  Elise could’ve said with absolute certainty that her arrival and introduction ranked as the most awkward moments in her life. She was pretty certain it would’ve been uncomfortable anyway, but there were more recent factors that made it worse because she was now as acutely conscious of Ja-rael’s discomfort as her own.

  She knew why he’d lied about where he’d found her. Self preservation was a strong motivation when the alternative was criminal charges and she was fairly certain a society as strict as this one seemed to be would not turn a blind eye to trafficking in illegal goods. She supposed it was for the same reason that he hadn’t admitted that she was no maned lioness. Obviously doing so would have aroused suspicions. Her being here might do so anyway. She was too different from everyone else not to be noticed where ever she went, and speculation was bound to follow.

  Why had he allowed them to believe she was his mate, though, when he’d told her that was no longer something he was interested in?

  Wouldn’t it have just been easier all the way around to make up some other kind of story to cover her presence? Wasn’t it going to be even more awkward for him when she disappeared again?

  Or maybe not. Maybe he figured he could just tell them a partial truth--that she’d returned to her own people?

  But why flowery speech about love?

  Her Meeri might not be all that great yet, but she’d followed well enough.

  She glanced up at him speculatively as they left the group and crossed the green toward one of the smaller domiciles on the square. Tension radiated from every line of his body despite the fact that his expression was carefully neutral.

  Maybe it was just the way these people spoke? The one called Clautz had been very elaborate in the way he spoke, particularly when he apologized. Not simply a ‘sorry’ and a shrug, but a scrupulously worded apology.

  She was almost disappointed when she came to that conclusion, but it seemed inescapable given what she’d learned about their speech patterns, and she hadn’t really believed it any of the time, she told herself. Love at first sight was a wonderful fantasy belief a lot of people indulged in, and it had certainly been proven that, scientifically speaking, two people sometimes connected instantly on a chemical level. But that wasn’t really love. You couldn’t love someone you didn’t know.

  Besides, she and Ja-rael weren’t even the same species as far as she knew. Even that sort of chemical ‘love’ couldn’t be possible, could it?

  Who was she kidding? One blast of his pheromones and she’d been putty in his hands and permanently, she feared, addicted. Obviously, the same could not be said for him, though, or he wouldn’t have calmly informed her that he’d concluded that it just wasn’t going to work out for him.

  Or maybe he’d had a similar chemical reaction, but he’d had enough time to get to know her to decide she just wasn’t his type?

  Lowering thought.

  Maybe she shouldn’t have been such a pushover? Apparently the women on his world had ‘hard to get’ down to a science. So, like anything else that was too easy to get, he’d been thrilled until it had dawned on him that it was too easy and therefore couldn’t possibly be the prize he’d thought it was.

  That was an even more distressing thought.

  She was almost relieved when Ja-rael helped her mount the shallow stairs leading to the house.

  The door was not locked. He simply opened it and ushered her in. Surprised, Elise couldn’t prevent the question that popped into her
mind. “You don’t lock your doors?”

  He looked equally surprised by the question. “Why would I lock the door? It is my home.”

  Elise blinked at that, several times, but decided she wasn’t going to admit that thievery was so common among her own kind that it was the only way to be sure you’d still have something when you returned home.

  A big city, full of people, and he didn’t lock his door. More than that, he was surprised enough she knew it wasn’t the exception, but the rule.

  She shrugged, dismissing it. “Why didn’t you tell them I’m not a lioness at all?”

  His flesh darkened. “I told you. Trade with the Torrines is forbidden. I’ve no desire to rot in prison only because….”

  He stopped abruptly, leaving the sentence hanging.

  “I grasped that part. But you could just as easily have told them that you’d found my colony in the lands beyond the dead lands--where ever that is, which I assume is some where on this planet.”

  He threw her an uncomfortable glance.

  “You didn’t want them to know I was ….” Elise stopped as a peculiar notion popped into her head. “An alien,” she finished. “I’m the alien here. Strange, but I never felt like an alien on Tor.” She thought that over for several moments. “I guess that was because I was still with my own people.”

  His lips tightened. “Yes. I expect that is it. And Minoa willing, none will learn before you leave so you will not be treated as an outsider.”

  There were undertones to his comment that disturbed her and made her certain that she wasn’t entirely right about his reasons even if she’d guessed a part of it. Instead of pursuing the matter and risking making things more uncomfortable between them, she decided to change the subject. “Who or what is this Minoa everybody keeps talking about?”

  “The mother of Meeri and of us all.”

  Elise gaped at him. “You’re not serious? Like a god or I guess goddess?”

  He frowned at the unfamiliar words, but Elise realized she’d learned nothing in either language to help her to translate. “The spirit you pray to? Worship?”