Volume 4 - The Disappearance of Suzumiya Haruhi

by Tanigawa Nagaru

  Volume 4

  The Disappearance of Suzumiya Haruhi

  Prologue

  It was a cold morning. So cold that it felt like the whole world would get neatly chipped up with some nice crisp cracks if it were poked with an ice pick. Or better yet, I would lead the pack to chip this freaking cold world up.

  Nevertheless, it was just natural to be cold; it was winter now. Until the Cultural Festival about a month ago, it had been so terribly hot. Then, just as it turned December, the weather chilled rapidly as if Mother Nature finally remembered, and now I experienced with this body of mine a Japan that had no Autumn this year. Don’t tell me that a certain somebody mixed up a business prosperity rebus with a spell… That Siberian cold air system should just as well change its course. There is no need for it to come down every year like that.

  Had the Earth’s revolution period gone crazy? Whilst I walked, giving sincere concern to Mother Nature’s health, I heard “Yo, Kyon!”

  A frivolous guy ran up to me to pat my shoulder in a helium-light manner. It was too much of a chore to stop my tracks, so I just turned my head towards him.

  “Yo, Taniguchi,” I replied, turned to face forward once again, and disdainfully gazed at the summit of the distant high hill. We commute up this slope every day, so why can’t they go easy on us during physical education lessons? All the physical education teachers, like Okabe our homeroom teacher, should be more concerned about the students who have to hike in order to commute every day. The teachers go by car, if I may point out.

  “Why are you talking like an old coot? Stride with a brisk pace! This is great exercise! It warms you up, doesn’t it? Here, look at me, I’m not even wearing a sweater. Summer is the worst, but this season is just great for me!”

  It’s fine to be so freaking high-spirited, but what’s your basis? Share some of that with me.

  Taniguchi’s never-closing mouth twisted into a smile.

  “The term-end tests are over! Thanks to that, we’re done learning for this year. Don’t you think that’s way more spectacular than what’s coming soon?”

  The term-end tests fell indiscriminately on all students in this school, and ended just as indiscriminately. The only difference, if anything, was probably the number scribbled on the graded answer papers that were returned to students.

  I recalled Mom’s expression when she started worrying about my impending cram school, and my mood sunk. When we enter eleventh grade next year, our class will be divided according to our preferred college. The arts course track or the science course track? Public college or private college? The choices made my head spin.

  “Who cares about that?” Taniguchi laughed away. “There are more important things to worry about, you know. Do you know what today is?”

  “December 17th,” I replied. “What about it?”

  “What a dumb response! You don’t even remember the special day next week which will set your heart flying?”

  “Oh I see.” I realized the right answer now. “End-of-term ceremony. The winter break is definitely worth the wait.”

  However, Taniguchi shot a glance at me like a small animal encountering a wildfire. “You’re not serious, are you? The date in one week! Think! The answer should pop up like that!”

  “Hmm…”

  I snorted and drew out a cloud of white breath.

  December 24.

  I knew, all right. I had already foreseen a certain somebody brewing an evil plot or hoax for next week. Even if everyone missed this, the truth never escaped my eyes. The person who spotted such events even quicker than me just sat there, behind me. She had been lamenting missing the chance at Halloween last month, and there was no doubt she would strike this time.

  Well, to be honest, I already knew exactly what she was going to do.

  Yesterday in the clubroom, Suzumiya Haruhi had in fact made the following announcement…

  “Does anyone have plans for Christmas Eve?”

  Haruhi, who threw her bag in as soon as she closed the door, looked at us contemptuously with sparkling eyes like the three stars of Orion.

  The tone resounded with the unsaid implication, “You cannot possibly have any plans. I know this; that’s crystal clear, right?” She would unleash a blizzard if anyone admitted to having prior plans.

  At that moment, Koizumi and I were playing a TRPG. Asahina-san, wearing her maid costume as if it were gradually becoming her normal wear, held her hands up in front of the electric stove. Nagato was reading the latest science fiction hardcover, moving only her finger and eyes.

  Haruhi placed a big handbag she brought along with her schoolbag on the floor, and walked towards me. Sticking her chest up, she looked down at me and proclaimed,

  “Kyon, I know you don’t have any plans whatsoever. There’s no need to ask, but I’d feel bad if I didn’t confirm it anyway, thus my question.”

  A smile like that of the world’s most famous cat was drawn across her face. Giving the dice I was about to throw to Koizumi, who was smiling conspiratorially, I turned to face Haruhi.

  “What if I do have plans? Answer that first.”

  “So that means you don’t have any!”

  Nodding self-indulgently, Haruhi took her eyes off me. Hey, stop for a moment! I still haven’t answered your question! …Well, it’s not as if this was the only time I had no plans.

  “Koizumi, are you going to be on a date with your girlfriend?”

  “How pleasant it would be if that were the case!”

  Shaking the die on his palm, Koizumi gave a dramatic sigh. It was in fact deliberate, and stank strongly of insincerity.

  “Whether it should be considered fortune or misfortune, my schedule before and after Christmas is void and empty. I have been twisting and turning alone, worrying about how I should spend the time.”

  That smiling handsome face of his just spelled out LIAR. However, Haruhi drank in his story without a doubt.

  “No worries! It’s the greatest of all blessings!”

  Then Haruhi set sail towards the maiden maid.

  “Mikuru-chan, how about you? Did anybody invite you out ‘to see the moment when rain turns to snow in the middle of the night?’ By the way, if you find anybody telling you this load of crap with a straight face, just beat the crap out of him.”

  Staring at Haruhi with big, wide-open eyes, Asahina-san looked taken aback by this sudden cross-examination.

  “Well, I guess so. For the moment there is nothing… Eh, middle of the night…? Ah… anyway, let me get you some tea…”

  “Volcano hot, please! The herb tea from some time ago was really fabulous,”

  Haruhi put down her order.

  “Y—Yes! It won’t take a minute.”

  Asahina-san put the kettle on the portable gas stove with a beaming face. Was making tea really that much fun?

  Nodding along in satisfaction, Haruhi turned to Nagato at last.

  “Yuki?”

  “No.”

  Nagato gave a short reply without lifting her head up from the pages.

  “There you go.”

  Ending the straightforward chirping conversation, Haruhi faced me again with an arrogant smile. I looked at Nagato’s pale face, her full attention to the book as if the conversation had nothing to do with her, and thought to myself, she might as well save her breath on such witty repartee. At least take some time to pretend to remember your schedule!

  Haruhi held up a hand.

  “The motion for a SOS Brigade Christmas party is thus passed unanimously. If there are alternatives or objections, please hand them in after the party. If I need to read them, I’ll read them.”r />
  In other words, it was the well-known situation once again: her words would not be taken back once they were said, no matter what. It was literally just a gesture, but when compared to half a year ago, Haruhi asking everyone’s plans could be considered an improvement. Well, it’d even be better if she asked for everybody’s opinions instead of their plans.

  With a face brimming with satisfaction that everything went as expected, Haruhi stuck her hand into her handbag on the floor.

  “By the way, nobody can come unprepared for a season like Christmas, right? So I bought a few items. The right way to spend the season starts with mood-creating gadgets!”

  Out of the bag came spray-on snow, gold and silver lace, crackers, a miniature tree, reindeer plushies, white cotton, Christmas lights, wreathes, red-and-green banners, a tapestry of the Alps, wind-up snowmen, thick candle stands, huge Christmas stockings that could hold a kindergartener, CDs of Christmas songs…

  With a smiling face like a neighborhood big sister that gives children candy, Haruhi neatly placed the various Christmas-related items on the table one by one.

  “I will inject festivity into this nondescript room. The introductory step towards enjoying Christmas proactively and positively starts with appearance. Didn’t you guys do the same thing when you were little?”

  No matter whether I did do that or not, my sister’s room would definitely be well decorated for Christmas some days later. Mom will probably force me to help decorate again this year. By the way, my sister, who’s turning eleven and going into the fifth grade this year, seems to still believe in Santa Claus somehow. She’s not aware of my parents’ cover-up job, which I happened to figure out long ago at the beginning of my life.

  “Learn from your sister’s innocent heart! One must start by believing in a dream. Otherwise, even the attainable will be out of reach. Nobody wins the lottery without buying a ticket, you know. You might wish for someone to give you a winning lottery ticket worth a million dollars, but that won’t happen!”

  Haruhi, howling in delight with unparalleled skill, took out a triangular party hat and put it on her head.

  “When in Rome, do as the Romans do. When in a village, follow the village rules. Christmas also has its own rules to follow. That’s why there are not many people who would celebrate a birthday in a bad mood. Hey, even Mister Christ would definitely rejoice seeing us having fun!”

  There have been many theories related to the birth of Christ, as even the year he was born is shrouded in mystery. But again, I’m not dumb enough to recite all the theories while being oblivious to the atmosphere. Moreover, on hearing that there’s multiple suggested dates for the birth of Christ, Haruhi would certainly blurt out “Well, then make each one of them Christmas!” and we would end up bringing out the tree many times each year. It would only be a fuss if we overrule the beginning of A.D; there is no help for it. Whether it is the Roman calendar or the ancient Babylonian calendar, it is just means to suit human matters. For the heavenly bodies that silently revolve in the vast universe these matters are nothing to be concerned about, and they will continue doing their thing until the end of their lives. Oh, how wonderful the universe is!

  My youthful spirit was tickled instinctively by the secrets of the Great Universe, but Haruhi didn’t give a damn about my dreams. Like a panda enthusiastically improving a room’s decor, Haruhi rolled around putting small Christmas decorations on all corners of the room, putting a triangular hat even on the reading Nagato, and hammering the words “Merry Xmas!” on the glass windows using her snow spray.

  That’s fine, but from the outside the words would be backwards, you know?

  While Haruhi concentrated on her activities, Asahina-san toddled towards us like a nutcracker doll, carrying a plate of teacups.

  “Suzumiya-saaaan, tea is ready.”

  Asahina-san’s appearance, with her maid-style smile, was still heavenly today, sending fresh enrichment into my heart no matter how many times I looked. Even after meeting her tragic fate nearly every time Haruhi said something, Asahina-san seemed to be comfortable with the Christmas party this time. Compared to giving out flyers in a bunny suit or appearing in movies wearing sexually harassing costumes, it would be a much more refined fun to enjoy a party everyone in the Brigade could cuddle in.

  But, will it really be just that?

  “Thank you, Mikuru-chan.”

  Haruhi took the cup in high spirits, and stood there gulping down the herb tea. Asahina-san watched with an innocent smile.

  Haruhi drank up all the hot liquid in a few seconds, and the smile on her face grew twice as wide as before.

  A bad omen. That’s the smile she has when she’s thinking of something down-and-dirty. After a long time by her side, even I could spot it.

  The problem was…

  “Marvelous taste, Mikuru-chan. It cannot be called a gift of gratitude, but I’d like to give you your present a little early.”

  “Oh, really?”

  The dainty maid fluttered her eyelids.

  “It’s true. So true, that there’s no truth above it. It’s as true as the moon revolving around the earth, and the earth revolving around the sun. You might not believe Galileo, but believe me!”

  “Uh, y-y-yes.”

  Haruhi reached into her bag once again.

  Detecting a sense and turning my head around, I met eye-to-eye with Koizumi, who gave a shrug and a faint forced smile. I’d like to snap on him for being so vague, but I somehow got it. He hadn’t joined the Haruhi bunch for over half a year for nothing, and it’d be strange if he couldn’t guess what would happen next.

  Yes, I thought.

  The problem was that there isn’t a person or medicine in the world that can cure Haruhi’s whims. I would grant the highest honors to whoever would invent that, personally.

  “Da-daaan!”

  With a childish sound effect, Haruhi took out the last Christmas item from the bottom of the bag. And that was…

  “That… that is…”

  Asahina-san retreated reflexively, and Haruhi proclaimed with the expression of an aged mage passing her beloved staff to her disciple.

  “Santa, that’s it! Santa! Doesn’t that fit like a glove! It goes without saying; you can’t highlight this time of the year without a season-specific outfit! There you go! I’ll help you change.”

  Closing gradually in on the retreating Asahina-san, Haruhi unfolded in her hands — a Santa Claus costume, no doubt.

  Then, Koizumi and I were thrown out of the clubroom, and could only imagine Haruhi conducting Asahina-san’s costume-changing scene in vain.

  “Eh” “Ah” “Ughh” The mournful faint cries bombarded me with unwanted images, and made me imagine that I could somehow see through the door. Okay, the time had probably come for me to really go nuts as well.

  After quite a stretch of time immersing himself in the imaginary tale, Koizumi struck up a conversation, perhaps to kill time. “I feel sorry for Asahina-san.”

  The guy with too much good looks and good manners leaned against the wall with his hands folded.

  “It makes my heart at ease when I see Suzumiya-san enjoying herself. It pains me most when Suzumiya-san looks annoyed.”

  “Because a strange space is created whenever she is irritated?”

  Throwing his bangs up using one index finger, he replied,

  “Yes, because of that as well. Nothing scares me and my partners more than the existence of Sealed Realities and Avatars. It might look easy to deal with, but it really is hard work. I thank my lucky stars that since this spring, the frequency of occurrences has gradually been decreasing.”

  “Which means it still happens from time to time?”

  “Rarely. Recently it only happens from midnight to sunrise, when Suzumiya-san is asleep. Most likely when she has bad dreams, she creates Sealed Realities subconsciously.”

  “She’s a troublemaker, whether she’s asleep or awake!”

  “Not at all!”

 
It was a sharp snap for Koizumi, and I was honestly a little shocked. Koizumi put away his smile, and gave me a long hard look.

  “I guess you do not know what Suzumiya-san was like before she entered high school. From three years ago when we started our observation to the time she entered high school, it was unimaginable that she would laugh so happily every day. It all started when she met you — no, to be exact, when you two returned from the Sealed Reality. Suzumiya-san’s psyche has stabilized a lot, it’s incomparable to how it was in junior high.”

  I returned Koizumi’s stare without a word, as if I’d be defeated if my eyes wandered off.

  “Suzumiya-san is obviously changing. In a good direction, I might add. Our desire is to keep this situation going, and I believe the same goes for you. To her now, the SOS Brigade is an indispensable gathering. Here she can find you, she can find Asahina-san, Nagato-san is essential, and pardon my conceit, but I guess I am also. All of us nearly became one heart and one flesh.”

  Now that’s just your logic.

  “That’s true. However, it doesn’t sound bad, does it? Do you want to see Haruhi setting her Avatars loose hour by hour? Excuse me, but it is certainly not a good hobby.”

  That’s not my hobby, and I won’t consider turning it into one. I need to state this clearly!

  Koizumi flipped his expressions, returning to his usual ambiguous smile.

  “I am relieved to hear that. Speaking of changes, they are not limited to Suzumiya; we all are changing. That includes you, Asahina-san, and me. Perhaps Nagato-san as well. Besides Suzumiya, everybody will more or less change their way of thinking.”

  I backed away. Not because I got hit on the spot. I didn’t take any of it personally, so I did not get hit figuratively. What I found surprising was that this guy had also noticed Nagato changing, bit by bit. The cheating baseball game, the Tanabata that spanned three yars, the cave cricket eradication, the murder drama on the isolated island, the looping summer break… As we were buzzing around doing this and that, Nagato’s limited gestures and attitudes had tiny, but definite changes. A far cry from our first meeting at the Literature Club, which was the beginning of everything. It was no illusion. I observed with eyes like hand-made telescopes. Now that I thought about it, that girl had already seemed a little strange, even on the isolated island. Even at the public pool. Even at the Obon Festival Dance. She showed even stranger behaviors when she was forced into the role of a mage for the movie, and the computer game battle against the Computer Society…