Under the dim night sky, wearing a North High uniform, the tiny figure stood there not knowing what was going on. She didn’t seem to understand why she was here, like someone suffering from sleepwalking who had suddenly woken up and begun to look around…
“Nagato,”
I said,
“This was all your doing, right?”
Wearing glasses, it was that Nagato. After the 18th, this Nagato Yuki was just the mere remaining member of the Literature Club, she was neither an alien or any mysterious entity whatsoever, just a very shy bookworm.
The bespectacled Nagato now looked even more astonished, not understanding what was going on,
“…Why… why… are you here?”
“I was about to ask you that, do you even know why you’re here?”
“…I’m taking a walk,”
Nagato said uneasily while widening her eyes. The glasses on the girl’s face that I was looking at reflected the light of the street lamp. I looked at her like that and thought,
No, it’s not like that, Nagato.
This girl was only feeling tired. Having to spend all day being turned around in circles by Haruhi, while busy saving my life, as well as being secretly active in some unknown location behind our backs - it was only natural that she would become fatigued by it all.
A while ago in Nagato’s apartment, this was what the Nagato three years ago told us:
“The erroneous files accumulated in my memory database will trigger an anomalous reaction. It can be foreseen that this is unavoidable. On December 18th three years from now, I will reconstruct the world.”
She continued calmly,
“There are no counter-measures available, because I do not know how such errors could occur.”
But I do.
I know the reason behind Nagato’s unexplicable, abnormal action, and just what those erroneous files she had been accumulating were.
It was the most basic desire. Even for an artificial intelligence run by a complex program, even for an android interface who never had such stuff installed, after living for some time, it was natural for her to develop such a desire. You’ll never understand, but I do. And probably Haruhi does as well.
I continued to observe Nagato’s troubled expression unreservedly. Yet the dream girl from the Literature Club now looked even more uncomfortable. Seeing how helpless she looked, I can’t help but yell inside, Nagato! This is what we call emotions!
It is because you were designed not to have any emotions to begin with, the reaction felt from you was far greater. You probably felt like screaming, or going ballistic, or just yelling out loud, You stupid girl! I’ve had enough of you! Right? No, even if she didn’t think that way, what she did was totally understandable. Her actions can be forgiven, because I was partly responsible, after all. I’ve become too reliant on her, having gotten used to letting Nagato take care of everything. I always thought that as long as Nagato was helping, I could switch off my brain. What an idiot I was, an even greater idiot than Haruhi. So I had no right to condemn her for this.
That was why Nagato - this girl here, came up with the silly idea of changing the world.
So was it an anomalous reaction, or a programming error?
Boy, you sure are annoying, it’s neither of the above.
This was what Nagato wished for - a normal world like this.
She only preserved my memories, while altering the memories of everyone else, including herself.
It was now that I finally understood the question that was puzzling me for the last few days.
Why was I the only one to remain unaffected?
The answer was simple, it was because the girl had wanted to let me make the choice.
Is the altered world better? Or is the original one better? Under her well crafted script, the final decision rests on me.
“Damn it,”
To hell with choosing! I never had a choice!
If I had only wanted the SOS Brigade, then I didn’t have to return at all. I could just start over in the new world. Haruhi and Koizumi may be studying in another high school, but that wouldn’t be too much of an obstacle. We’ll just treat it as an out-of-school hobby. This mysterious club can meet as usual at that coffee shop. Over there, Haruhi would come up with some ridiculous stuff, while Koizumi would grin all the time; Asahina-san would look extremely distressed, and I would just look away with a scowl on my face… An image of that scene floated in my mind at once. The Nagato there would probably look troubled as well, of course she would still quietly read her book. Yet still…
That wouldn’t be the SOS Brigade that I knew. Nagato isn’t an alien, Asahina-san isn’t a time traveler from the future, and Koizumi’s just a normal person, while Haruhi wouldn’t possess any extraordinary powers. It would just be a simple, normal and happy club.
Am I fine with that? Isn’t that even better?
How did I think about it at first? Just what did I make of Haruhi’s constant trouble-makings beyond the boundaries of common sense?
What a pain.
Enough already!
Are you an idiot!?
I’ve had enough with you!
“……”
My heart began to hurt.
A normal high school student who was forced to take part in many troublesome situations, constantly complaining to Haruhi yet still managing to live to tell the tale. That was the role I’ve been playing all along.
Now then! Yes, Kyon! I’m talking to you! I’ve got to ask myself a very important question, so listen carefully and answer me. You can’t refrain from answering. Just a single “yes” or “no” would do. Now listen up, here comes the question:
Don’t you find such a weird and extraordinary school life fun?
Hurry up and answer, Kyon! Think carefully. Well? Can’t I ask what you think of this? Hurry up and tell me. In a world where I was being turned around in circles by Haruhi; attacked by aliens; hearing a time traveler explain wild theories; putting up with the philosophical babble with an esper; trapped in a Sealed Dimension where giants go on a rampage; living with a cat that speaks; making an incomprehensible leap through time; not to mention having to follow the strict rule of not letting Haruhi know all of these, allowing the commander of the SOS Brigade to happily continue her pursuit of mysterious events, while completely oblivious that she has made a huge mess.
Don’t you find such a world interesting?
Or did you think that was just too annoying, and had wanted to tell her enough is enough? Since you’ve always thought she was an idiot and had decided to ignore her. Well? Is it true? In other words? Is that what you really think?
That world was hardly interesting at all.
Are you sure? According to what you said, you find Haruhi in the original world to be very annoying. No matter what wild ideas she would come up with, you would always feel melancholic. Of course it’s natural that you wouldn’t find such a world to be interesting. And don’t tell me it’s not true! You know it is.
Yet, in reality you’re secretly enjoying all of this. Because that world is interesting.
You ask me why I say that?
Then let me tell you why,
Didn’t you hit the “Enter” key?
You know, the one for the Emergency Escape Program that Nagato left for you.
Are you ready?
The answer you gave for that question then was a resolute “yes.”
Am I right?
Our Great Goddess Nagato went far out of her way to create a stable world for you, and you had to turn down her offer. Ever since you met Suzumiya Haruhi back in April, you’ve taken that idiotic world for granted. You actually want to return to a crazy world where aliens, time travelers and espers wander freely in school. Why is that? Aren’t you the one who was complaining all the time about how woeful you are?
If that were the case, then why didn’t you ignore the Escape Program? By choosing to stay in this very normal world here, you’ll know Haruhi, Asahina-san, Koizumi and Nag
ato as ordinary high school students, and lead a happy life as usual under Haruhi’s leadership. Since Haruhi doesn’t have any powers, you could say goodbye to all those surreal experiences.
In that world, Haruhi would just be a normal girl who likes to boss people around; Asahina-san would no longer have the attribute of being a time traveler from the future, she would just be a very cute character; Koizumi would be a normal high school student without any backing from some mysterious ‘Organization’; and Nagato would just be a timid and humble bookish girl, not having to carry any burden or use any amazing powers to observe or protect someone. Oh yeah, though most of the time she would remain expressionless, she would still laugh heartily at some lame joke, and then blush furiously. Who knows, she could be a person who could slowly open herself up if I spend some time with her.
Such an idyllic life that would be, and yet you have forsaken it.
Just why is that?
I’ll ask you one last time. Answer me truthfully.
Do you find Haruhi the troublemaker and the nightmarish events that she causes to be interesting? Hurry up and answer!
“Of course I do,”
I answered as such,
“It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize it was fun. So don’t ask me something so trivial anymore.”
If someone had actually said they don’t find that interesting, then that person would be a blithering idiot. His wits would be thirty times dimmer than Haruhi’s.
I mean, there are aliens, time travelers and espers out there!
Just one alone would be intriguing enough, but to have three sorts of interesting characters all at once! With Haruhi included, some powerful force is bound to be triggered. At this rate, I’ll never be bored. If someone had made any objections to that, I think I’d beat him to a pulp at once.
“So that’s how it is,”
I said to myself. You could say I’ve finally been enlightened.
“I still prefer the original world. This world just doesn’t suit me. I’m sorry, Nagato. I don’t like the present you, I prefer the Nagato from before. Besides, I like you better without glasses,”
This Nagato looked at me with a very puzzled face,
“What are you talking about…”
The Nagato Yuki I know would never say something like that.
This girl would have no knowledge of these three days, when I discovered something was wrong up to now. That was to be expected, because this Nagato had just been reborn, and so has never met me. She would have no memory of looking shocked as I barged into the Literature Club.
The only memory this Nagato had was the fabricated memory in the library. Besides that, the memory we share now all happened since she changed the world a while ago.
A few months ago, I was trapped in the grey Sealed Dimension with just Haruhi. According to Koizumi, that was a new world created by Haruhi.
Nagato was probably using that power. Somehow she managed to nick or steal that mysterious power from Haruhi and used it to create this world.
That sure was a convenient power. No matter who it is, they will always have the thought of wanting to start all over, or wishing that things would go back to where it would be favorable for them.
Yet, a normal person would never be able to achieve such a wish. And it was better that they gave up that thought. I myself didn’t want to start all over, which was why I returned from the Sealed Dimension with Haruhi.
This incident was caused by the transferral of a god-like omnipotent power from Haruhi to Nagato. Haruhi was unaware of it all, while Nagato lost control and went forward to change the world.
“Nagato,”
I walked towards the stiff tiny figure standing there. Nagato remained motionless and stared back at me.
“No matter how many times I have to say this, my answer is the same. Please return everything to normal, including you as well. Let’s live to fight another day in the club room. As long as you give the signal, I’ll be there for you. Lately Haruhi hasn’t been going astray for no reason now, so there’s no need for you to use such an unhealthy power to forcefully change the world. Just keep everything as it is.”
The eyes under the glasses betray a sense of fear.
“Kyon-kun…”
Asahina-san tugged at my sleeve and said,
“It’s useless trying to explain to this Nagato-san. Because even she has changed. This Nagato-san is just a normal girl without any powers…”
I suddenly thought of something.
The long haired Haruhi in that world called me John. Without any god-like or demon-like powers, she was just an ordinary schoolgirl who barged into North High without hesitation. Her eyes glittered brightly as she showed great interest in my story about the SOS Brigade, while exclaiming, “Sounds like fun!”
Carrying a wide grin at all times, the Koizumi there said he fancies Haruhi. Wearing my PE uniform, the straight A transfer student would show a complicated expression.
Giving me an invitation to join the Literature Club, this bespectacled Nagato would reminisce her fabricated memory together with me. The smile on her face was like the sun rising out of the horizon, I can’t help but want to see that smile once again.
I realized I would never see these people again. To be honest, I kind of missed them. It’s just that their existences were all fabricated. They were not the Haruhi, Koizumi, Nagato and Asahina-san I knew. It was a pity I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to them, but I’ve already made up my mind. I want to go back to the Haruhi, Koizumi, Nagato and Asahina-san I knew.
“I’m sorry.”
I took the gun out and pointed it. Nagato instantly froze on the spot, seeing her reaction, I felt extremely criminal. But I’ve come this far, so there’s no point in hesitating.
“Everything would return to normal very soon. We’ll be able to go to many different places again, have our Christmas hot pot, and then go to the mansion in the snow mountain. You can be the Great Detective this time. A Great Detective that could solve the case just when it has occurred, right? That’ll be……”
“Kyon-kun! Look out… KYAA!!”
As Asahina-san screamed out, someone rammed into my back. Thud! A loud shudder caused me to shake, even the shadow under the street lamp was shaking. In that shadow was the silhouette of another person. What the? Who was it?
“I can’t let you hurt Nagato-san!”
I turned my head over my shoulder and saw the pale face of a girl.
Asakura Ryoko.
“What the…”
I couldn’t say anything, as I suddenly felt something icy cold jabbed into my abdomen. It was a flat object that was thrusted deep into my body. So cold. The sense of disorientation far surpassed the sense of pain. Just what was going on? How can this be? Why was Asakura here?
“Hee hee,”
To me, her grin looked like that of an expressionless mask that has suddenly begun smiling. Asakura then backed off from me, pulling out the blood-soaked dagger which she used to stab me.
Losing my balance, I fell to the ground like a spinning top. Standing before me all this time, Nagato’s legs gave in as she slumped to the ground and said fearfully,
“Asakura…-san?”
As though greeting someone, Asakura-san waved the Swiss army knife that was drenched in my blood and said,
“Hi, Nagato-san. Don’t you worry, as long as I’m here, I’ll eliminate anyone that attempts to threaten you. That was the reason why I was created.”
Asakura smiled and continued,
“It is what you have wished for, isn’t it?”
That’s a lie. Nagato would never have made such a wish. She’s not the sort to kill a bird simply because it’s not singing as she wants it to. Absolutely not. As Nagato began to act abnormally, this Asakura that was re-created was also acting in an abnormal way, basically becoming a shadow to Nagato……
Asakura’s shadow slowly landed on my body. Very soon her silhouette blocked out the moon from my vision.
“Allow me to send you on your last journey. As long as you’re dead, everything will be fine. It’s your fault for making Nagato-san suffer in the first place. Does it hurt? I’m sure it does. Better enjoy it while it lasts, because that’ll probably be the last sensation you’ll ever feel,”
The wide dagger was slowly lifted, the tip of the blade was pointed to my heart. I was bleeding non-stop. Is this the end? …I struggled to think as my mind became blurry. I was losing all sense of reality. So, Psycho Asakura, is this your mission? To act as back-up to Nagato Yuki…
The dagger began to move downwards…
In the blink of an eye, a hand stretched out from one side.
“…!!!”
Someone had grabbed the blade of the dagger, and with bare hands as well.
“Who the…?”
Bare hands…!? Where have I seen this before?
My vision was becoming more and more blurry, so I couldn’t tell who it was. There’s not enough light, anyone mind turning up the light? She was standing in front of the bright street lamp, so I couldn’t see her face properly. All I knew was that it was a short-haired girl…wearing a North High uniform…not wearing glasses…that’s all I could see… Koizumi! …Where’s the guy in charge of lighting when you need him!?
“Huh…!?”
Exclaiming softly was Nagato, who was sitting on the ground. Her glasses reflected the brightness of the street lamp, so I couldn’t see her expression clearly. Was it fear? Or was it astonishment?
“Why? But you’re…!? Why…”
Asakura yelled. She seemed to be talking to the girl who caught the blade with her bare hands, but the girl remained silent and said nothing.
Asahina-san sounded as though she was right next to me,
“I’m so sorry… Kyon-kun, I should have known, but still…”
“Kyon-kun! Kyon-kun…… No! You can’t!”
There seems to be two Asahina-sans. One was the adult Asahina-san, while the other was the Lolita Asahina-san that I knew. Both had tears all over their faces, and were shaking my body. Hey, both of you, that hurts…
…Huh? What was Asahina-san (small) doing here? While I could still understand the adult Asahina-san holding me in her arms and crying, since she came here with me to this time period; but just where on earth did the little Asahina-san come from? Ah, I get it now. It’s one of those illusions, a recollection of one’s whole life as one reaches the end of his life…
Volume 4 - The Disappearance of Suzumiya Haruhi Page 14