“Ok,” she said, pulling her legs up to fold them under her. “It said that I was required to ‘perform duties’ for the Stretton heir as dictated by him. It didn’t say what, but I knew what it meant. A similar thing would be written into any employment contract because employers like to cover their asses if they have to assign different responsibilities. The mistress contract laid out the hierarchy, stating I was ultimately answerable to Teddy.”
“So, he could hire and fire you,” Robbie said, laying out shelves, though he paused to scowl. “Doesn’t that mean he could’ve asked you to… you know?”
“Have sex with him?” she asked and shrugged. “I don’t know. I tried not to think about it… I wouldn’t have done it though.”
“But, you slept with Max.”
“Because I loved Max,” she said, folding the instructions and thinking she’d need to go get the tools she’d found under the bed. When she lifted her chin, all the guys were looking at her. “What?”
“Loved?” Robbie asked, his head tilting. “I think that’s the first time I’ve ever heard you use the past tense.”
“You don’t love Max anymore?” Bobby asked, almost like a bereft child.
Tally knew that they missed him and knew that there were times all of them used her as a crutch to the man who they’d taken for granted while he’d been their friend. It wasn’t their fault that Max’s life had changed so much. It wasn’t Max’s fault either. It was just one of those things. But, their nostalgia about the old days bound them all together in the difficult times.
“I’ll never stop loving the Max that we knew,” she said. “The Max that he was the day you guys found out about Stretton… But, you guys understand better than anyone else why it’s important for me to let go of that… of what we had.”
None of the guys appeared happy about it and she wasn’t either. But, it was what it was and there wasn’t a thing any of them could do about it.
Getting off the couch, Tally went into the bedroom to pull the toolbox from under the bed. Falling to her butt, she let the heavy thing move on its momentum another few inches and tossed her hair back only to see…
His tee-shirt. There snagged under one of the bottom corners of the heavy box was one of Max’s tee-shirts. Tally wasn’t sure she wanted to touch it. This was one of the reasons she hadn’t gone snooping. Most of the drawers were empty because he’d taken his clothes with him. She’d aired the room out, trying to get rid of his lingering scent because she just couldn’t handle living with the torture of it.
Reaching forward, she was about to touch the fabric when a thud next door made her head rise. It sounded almost like the front door closing, but she couldn’t believe it was. All the guys were here, and they were going out for dinner after building the bookcase, so she didn’t know why any of them would leave.
Unless someone had got bad news.
Leaping to her feet, worrying about her friends, Tally was on her way to the bedroom door when the sound of his voice stopped her in her tracks.
“…I’m asking why you’re here.”
That was Max. She recognized the tone, though he was far more deliberate in his speech than she’d ever heard him before. The Stretton conditioning was beginning to pay off… from Teddy’s point of view anyway.
“Us? What are you doing here?” Ryan asked.
“Yeah,” Robbie leaped in to back up his buddy. “Who the fuck are you, anyway? What’s with the suit?”
She smiled. His friends wouldn’t be used to seeing him groomed. She’d lived with him while he’d been like that and never gotten used to it.
“It’s clothes. Look at the state of what you’re wearing,” Max said, and though she couldn’t see him, she could hear his disgust.
Teddy was in that room. Not physically, he wouldn’t reduce himself to coming to a place like this. But, Teddy was there in Max. Tally had never heard him sound more like his father.
Back in the day, Max wouldn’t have noticed what any other person was wearing, much less judged them for it.
“It’s sick, isn’t it?” Bobby said, but he wasn’t agreeing with Max.
“So, which one of you screwed up enough to take advantage of this place being empty?” Max asked, and the judgement in his voice made her stomach roil.
No swearing, no twang of slang or laziness to his words. Before Stretton, Max would have given his last to these guys and wouldn’t have cared if he woke up to find them all sleeping on his floor. He’d have let them all move in and would never have considered it sponging or screwing up.
“You’re a real bastard, you know… didn’t take long, did it? What a fuck.”
This could quickly descend into a fight and Tally didn’t want that. The friendship group had only pleasant memories of their buddy, well, mostly. All of that could be undone with one swing and then her Max truly would be gone.
“Just tell me which one of you screwed up—”
Tally stepped out of the bedroom. “I did.”
He didn’t look like him. He didn’t even look like the man who she’d left at the Stretton Estate a month ago. With his hair slicked and his face smooth, there wasn’t an eyelash out of place or a single stray brow hair.
The scowl on his face looked different too, but it faded to shock when he saw her. “Tallulah.”
Any of the guys who weren’t on their feet before were up now. “Go back in the bedroom, G,” Robbie said.
Sucking in a breath, Tally slid her hands into her back jeans pockets. “It’s ok. We knew this would happen eventually.”
Max still paid rent on this apartment, although he probably didn’t notice the money leaving his account. Just like he wouldn’t have noticed Robbie making a deposit into his bank account every month; a deposit that was from her to replace the rent that he was paying.
There was no way Max still used his old accounts. He probably hadn’t opened a statement or even a banking app for months. Back in his old life, he’d been aware of every cent, or the lack of them, now each one meant little to him because they were surrounded by so many dollars.
“Want me to call Trey?” Robbie asked.
She shook her head. “I’ll do it…” Tally eyed the door. “Will you guys…”
“You sure?” Robbie asked.
Bobby and Mark came over to kiss her, Ryan lurked by Robbie, but when she smiled and nodded, both came over to kiss her before the four shuffled toward the door past Max.
“Prick,” Mark grumbled as he went past.
All four went out and the door closed. The living room was a mess with the pieces of the bookcase laid out on the floor, but she wouldn’t have any way to transport that, so it would have to stay where it lay.
“Can I have a half hour to pack up?” she asked and gestured at the floor. “Not that, you can burn that; I just need to pack clothes and stuff.”
“I didn’t say you had to leave,” Max said.
No, but she wasn’t going to make this any more awkward for either of them. “The only reason you’d have to be here is if you’re giving up the lease,” she said. “This wasn’t supposed to be a long-term solution for me anyway, I got lazy… It won’t take long…” She took a backwards step, then paused. “I have a box of your stuff, I… I don’t guess any of it is important, but, you know, it felt wrong to throw it out.”
“I don’t need any of that stuff,” he said, undoing the button on his jacket and pulling at his tie to loosen it. “I don’t need anything.”
“Oh… ok,” she said, figuring that would’ve been the case, but she didn’t expect him to be so abrupt about it. A lot could change in a month and he was a prime example of that. “Then just give me a minute… please.”
Turning around, she was going to head into the bedroom and was trying to prioritize what she’d need to grab. As though their conversation wasn’t done, he surprised her by talking. “You look good.” She paused but didn’t turn around. “This place looks good… Better than it ever did when I was here.”
> Moving to face him, she was still wary. “I clean.”
His eyes kept moving around the apartment. “Must be what it is.”
“Have you talked to Benny?”
He looked sort of blank and that just intrigued her. Tally couldn’t figure out why he’d be so out of it. “Hmm? Who?”
“The landlord,” she said. “I can call him. We’re paid up until the end of the month, so that should give you time to clear out anything you need… Robbie couldn’t remember if the furniture came with the place or not…”
Max’s attention was still drifting. “Hmm?”
“The furniture,” she said. “Did the apartment come furnished?”
“Uh… yeah, I… I think so.”
Much as it wasn’t her place and she was sort of reluctant to, she asked, “Are you ok?”
“Am I ok?” he murmured, wandering toward the kitchen, but stopping before he entered it to turn and wander back toward the door. “Am I ok…”
Taking a backwards step, she pointed over her shoulder. “I’m just going to—”
“My friends don’t recognize me… My girl fucked off and left me… I’ve got targets I couldn’t give a damn about… Women without souls throwing themselves at me… And, I’m being commanded by an organ grinder who asks me to do a different damn dance every day…”
His pace had increased as he strode a path from the door to the end of the breakfast bar and back. But, it was the urgency and tension in his tone that made her think he might be on the cusp of some kind of breakdown or explosion.
“I’ll just—”
“Who the fuck am I, Tal?” he asked, stopping to open his arms wide at his sides. “Who the fuck am I?”
“You… You’re Max Stretton.”
A wry, unimpressed smile twisted his lips. His arms fell. “Yeah, that’s who the fuck I am… And, when the fuck did that happen, huh? When the fuck did I decide it was ok to let some fuck who I never gave a damn about dictate my entire fucking life?” Raising a pointed finger, tension worked his jaw. “I never gave a damn fuck about money, or investments, or maximizing profit. But, every fucking day, I trot into that damned glass crypt emblazoned with the name of the fucker who abandoned me and my mom, never gave a damn fuck about either of us. But, every day I show up and perform like his dutiful little slave.”
“The life you have is one of privilege,” she said. “It’s not to be sneered at. Of course it comes with some responsibility, sir.”
The word just sort of slipped out, but it made his whole expression and demeanor change. She’d thought he was tense before, but that was nothing to how his body clenched when he leaped toward her.
“You remember what the fuck I told you about calling me that?”
“Things have changed,” she said, annoyed and frustrated that he seemed to have regressed in his understanding. “You know that. You know that things aren’t the same in your life as they used to be. They’re not the same with the guys, here in the apartment, with us. You’re a different man. A new man. You have so much potential and—”
“Goddamnit, Tallulah!” he shouted so loud that she thought she saw plaster crumble from the ceiling. “I liked the man I was. I liked my friends, my life… being with my girl.”
“So, what, Max?” she asked. “You’re just going to give up everything you’ve worked for?”
His tone became a growl. “Everything in my life was just fine before I heard the name Stretton.”
“Before I showed up,” she said. “That’s what you’re saying. Everything was fine before I came into your life and ruined everything.”
Loosening to contrition, he started toward her, rounding the couch and closing the space between them. “You know that’s not it,” he said and tried to touch her face, but she pushed his hand away. “Tally, you know how I feel about you. You coming into my life, us meeting, it changed my perspective on everything. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you… Baby, I’m sorry.”
His fingertips touched her jaw and she closed her eyes. Resenting the tear that streaked her cheek, Tally couldn’t imagine a worse place for him to be touching her. In this apartment, which they’d shared as a place of love, Tally could feel connected to him. But, this Max, in this moment, could ruin all that.
“Don’t,” she whispered.
“Baby,” he murmured again and eased her chin up to lower his mouth to hers.
Their lips barely met before she put both hands on his chest and pushed him back. “What do you think? Sex will make you feel better?” she asked, letting the burn of her tears become anger. “How dare you come in here and think you can use me like that! You think you can fuck me and then fuck off without giving a damn about what it will do to me? Do you know how hard I’ve worked here? How impossible it’s been to move on from us? But, you don’t care about that, do you?”
“I can look after you,” he said and smiled. “With you here, it’s great. Stretton doesn’t have to know. No one does. We can be us again, Tal. Right here.”
She couldn’t believe that he looked so relaxed and easy about the idea. “My God,” she whispered. “Your daddy would be proud.” His smile dropped. “I will not be your mistress. How many ways do you want me to say it? For one thing, Strettons aren’t allowed mistresses who don’t sign a contract. If we start up again, I guess that means the one we had will become valid again, I don’t know. The six months aren’t up. I won’t live like that. I won’t be with a man I can’t respect, a man who doesn’t respect me.”
“Tally, I respect you.”
“If you did, you wouldn’t have ever used the phrase ‘I can look after you’ with me. How dare you, Max? Jesus, it’s no wonder the guys don’t recognize you. I don’t recognize you… You’re damn sure not the man I fell in love with. If the man I fell in love with was here, and he heard anyone saying that to me, he’d put his damn fist through their teeth… You should be ashamed of yourself, Max. I always knew that hiding under Teddy’s wing would change you, but I didn’t ever think it would turn you into this… If you want to kick me out of this apartment, kick me out. But, if you’re here looking for pity or sympathy or my self-respect, you can get the fuck out of here and never come back.”
Saying the words sent a barb of terror and pain right through her chest. She could feel the agony in her heart and in her spine, and the sensation spread throughout her. Tally didn’t want to hate him. She had tried so hard not to judge him for the life he had or the man he had to become to fit into it. But, she’d always wanted to believe her Max was still in there.
Just the suggestion that she’d want to be a kept woman, a secret kept woman, made her sick. That Max could think she’d even consider it proved to her just how far he’d come and it wasn’t a change that pleased her.
Without another word, or even a flinch of expression, Max turned around and walked out.
Letting go of her held breath, Tally yelped in pain and sank down onto the floor, clasping both hands over her mouth. Max was gone, her Max, gone in every way. The heartache that she’d held at bay hit her all at once and she bent forward, pressing her face into her hands against the carpet.
Max had asked who he was, but Tally wasn’t all that sure she knew who she was anymore either. Her heart hurt, and her future was uncertain. Any comfort she’d taken in knowing Max was out there in the world and happy dwindled.
Their relationship was over, the respect was gone, and Tally had never felt more alone.
TWENTY-FIVE
Coming back from the garage, Tally was looking forward to collapsing on the couch and ordering some greasy Chinese food. Tired and achy, she attributed her low mood and exhaustion to what had happened with Max yesterday.
If that was what was causing it, she had to shake it off, but telling herself to get over it, wasn’t as easy as actually getting over it.
Taking her key from her pocket, she slid it into the lock, and threw her weight behind the door that had liked to stick in the frame for as long as she’d known it.
But, as she burst through into the apartment, she was startled to see the TV on.
She might have thought maybe she left it on that morning, but she only ever watched the news in the morning, and the TV appeared to be on some sports round-up, something. Still watching it and creeping closer, she dumped her purse on the floor and was about to reach for the remote on the end table when she was startled by the sound of a male belch from the kitchen.
Turning, she didn’t know who to expect because she’d just left the guys at the garage and knew they were planning to go out for food and then to Fitzpatrick’s because they’d invited her to go along with them. But, Tally was too tired to be social tonight.
There was no way any of them could’ve got there before her, but…
Max appeared at the end of the breakfast bar, tipping beer into his throat. He gulped down what appeared to be most of the bottle before lowering it and rubbing a hand on his bare belly. All he was wearing was a pair of jeans, his hair was tousled, and his jaw rough. It almost felt like she’d stumbled back in time.
“Hey, Boss,” he said. “Want a beer?” In a stupor, she just let her head move side to side. “You earn us lots of green today, baby?”
“Did I…”
He frowned. “I’m starved… What you cooking?”
“I…” She hadn’t planned to cook at all, but… Tally dropped her keys onto the end table and tried to shake off her surprise. “What are you doing here?”
“I live here,” he said, passing the bistro table and leaping over the back of the couch to slouch on it with his legs stretched toward her. “Throw me the remote, baby, huh?”
“Max, you don’t live here. I live here. And, I told you yesterday, if you want me to go—”
“No, I don’t want you to go,” he said. “We live here. Maybe that’s a better way to say it… Yeah, we live here.” Crunching up, he doubled himself to grab the remote and then lay back down, sliding a hand behind his head. He patted his stomach. “Come lay down, baby. We can order pizza. Make out… I’ll let you pick the movie.”
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