“Nope.” She set aside the booze, her head spinning from the effects of the alcohol on her mostly empty stomach, and rested her head on his arm. “Not yet.”
He wrapped his free arm around her waist and sighed. “What do you want now?”
“This.” She held the bar she’d grabbed before he joined her between their faces. “Eat it for me.”
He clenched his jaw. “I told you, I’ll eat when I’m ready. Honestly, I think my hunger wore off hours ago.”
“And I told you that I’m worried about you, whether you want me to be or not.” She poked him in the chest. “So you’ll eat it and you’ll like it, damn it, because I care.”
His mouth softened, and he lifted his hand to cup her cheek. “Red. I don’t know what to say.”
“Say you’ll eat it.” She unwrapped it and shoved it under his nose. “It’s open now. It’ll go bad if you don’t.”
He let out an aggravated sigh, but the amusement in his eyes ruined the annoyed effect he was going for. “You’re a lot more stubborn than I remember you being.”
“Yeah, yeah.” She wiggled the bar under his nose. “Now eat.”
He let go of her, snatched it out of her hand, and took a big bite. “Have you always been this bossy?”
“No. I kind of grew into it with age.” She lifted a shoulder and rested her hands against his chest. “My turn to ask a question.”
He arched a brow and swallowed. “Are we making this a game?”
“Sure, why not? I don’t think there’s anything good on television tonight anyway,” she said, gesturing toward the fire. “Do you like being a doctor?”
He took another bite, chewed, and swallowed. “Yeah. I love helping people. Healing people. I get a bigger thrill out of going overseas to help people who can’t find clean water, let alone quality health care.”
“Do you—?”
He pressed a finger to her lips. “Slow down there, Ms. Journalist. It’s my turn to ask a question.”
Her stomach tightened when he ran his finger down her lower lip, his eyes on her mouth. He looked like he was debating kissing her. All she could think was: heck yeah, do it. “Go ahead.”
She wasn’t sure if she was giving him permission to kiss her or ask her a question, but he seemed determined to do the latter. “How many men have you been with since me?”
She choked on a laugh. “And here I was being nice with an easy question.”
“I’m not nice like you,” he said. “Answer me.”
“Yeah you are. You’re just nosy, too.”
“Sure.” He shrugged. “Now answer.”
“Fine.” She scooted out of the sleeping bag and hugged her knees. He sat up, unzipped the sleeping bag, and tucked their feet inside. “But if you want me to answer the question, you better hand over that bottle next to you.”
He picked up the vodka and gave it to her. “Here you go. But give it back. I might need a swig before I hear the answer.”
She took the bottle and sipped before she returned it to him, watching as he washed down the last of his protein bar with some vodka. He set it down and stretched his legs inside the sleeping bag. She rested her leg against his, soaking in his heat.
“Five.” She peeked up at him and blew out a breath. “None of them were serious.”
“Oh.” He flexed his jaw. “I see.”
She rolled her eyes. “You didn’t seriously think I was a born-again virgin, did you?”
He looked back at her, his eyes flashing. “No. But I underestimated the effect that the thought of another guy touching you would have on me. I don’t like it.”
Her heart skipped a beat at the possessiveness in his voice and the way he looked at her. This wasn’t good. He couldn’t go getting all territorial. She couldn’t let herself like it, because she’d only been crossing items off her list. Nothing more. Ignoring the need swirling violently within her, she forced her mind back to the topic at hand. “My turn. How many have you been with?”
He flinched. “To be honest? I didn’t keep count.”
Jealousy ripped through her. Unwanted, harsh, hot, ugly jealousy. “That many?”
“It’s not that. I just tried not to concentrate on it or anything.” He dragged a hand through his hair and took a long pull of the vodka. “I guess…ten or fifteen? Maybe.”
“At least you didn’t say fifty,” she mumbled, wanting to punch him in his perfect face. “Or a hundred.”
Reaching out, he toyed with a piece of her hair. “Are you jealous, Red?”
“Me?” She snorted. “Jealous?” She snorted again. Okay. She was kind of starting to sound like a dying pig. “Of course not.”
He smirked. “Don’t be. They’re all faceless women to me, really. A means to an end, or a way to scratch an itch. I never wanted a relationship, or anything remotely resembling one. I’m already married to my job. Plus, none of them made my heart race and my palms sweat. None of them made me forget who I was and what I wanted out of life, or made me second-guess myself in those very things.”
“Is that the medical definition of love?” she asked. If so, she was screwed, because he did that to her. Always had. “Sweaty palms, racing hearts, and forgotten dreams?”
“I think so.” He lifted a shoulder and dropped her hair. “But who am I to say? I’m just a doctor. I don’t know anything but my job. Love? That’s for normal men. Men like me don’t get married. We’re never home.”
“That’s not true,” she said softly. She hesitated, not sure how to say what she wanted to say. So she settled for, “You can be in love and not give up your career. You can be an excellent doctor and go home to your wife and kids.” She almost choked on the words. The idea of him having a wife and kids hurt. “You can be a doctor and a man. They’re not two separate beings.”
The way he looked at her when she said that made her want to curl up in a ball and rock in the corner. He looked at her as if…
As if he wanted her to be that wife.
Chapter Twelve
Letting her words soak in, Tyler tilted his head back, staring up at the bright, shiny stars. No matter where you were in the world, the stars always looked the same. Constant and sure. What else in this life stayed so steady? Nothing. That’s what.
Jesus. He was waxing philosophical about the fucking stars. How much had he had to drink so far? Not enough to wipe out the fact that he wanted more than a night under the stars from Christine. At some point, he’d realized how much he enjoyed being with her, and he wanted to keep it that way.
He wasn’t the “snuggling while talking about dreams, hopes, and aspirations” type of guy. He didn’t play that way. Didn’t look for love around every corner or even want it. He was married to his job. He didn’t need two wives. But with Christine in his arms…
Maybe he could see it.
She was telling him he was more than his job, that he could be the man she would need him to be and the doctor he needed to be. He wanted to believe her so fucking bad it hurt. “You think I could find a woman who wouldn’t mind sharing me with my other wife?”
She looked up at the sky, too, then back at him. “If she loved you and you loved her? Sure. Why not?”
He let out a whoosh of air. She made it sound so easy, but he’d seen what happened to each of his buddies when they married. They got divorced. Simple as that. If he got married, he wanted it to be forever. He didn’t want to fail. He tugged on his shirt. Since when was the neck of this shirt so damn small? “I guess it’s possible. But I’m not in the market for that right now.”
“Yeah,” she murmured. He watched her closely, looking for any sign of disappointment in her eyes. Nothing. Not even a flash of uncertainty. “Me either. I’ve been trying to loosen up and…enjoy life. Stop trying to plan everything all the time.”
“Is that why you made a list?” he asked. “To stop planning everything?”
She laughed. “Kinda backward, huh? But…yes. That’s why.”
He swallowed hard. “Yo
u know, when I touch you like this…” He ran his hands up her sides. They were sweaty and a little bit shaky. “I remember what it’s like to really feel something. I’d forgotten how you made me feel. How to feel, even.”
Her lips trembled. “Tyler.”
His cradled her cheeks with his hands and leaned in. When his mouth closed on hers, he kissed her with all the pent-up passion and uncertainty he was feeling. Lately? It was a hell of a lot. When it came to her, he didn’t know what he felt. But something told him if he wasn’t careful, by the time they were finished with each other…
He would need her more than he needed medicine.
Whatever this thing was between them, it had started down in Mexico, and had been left in waiting until they saw each other again. Now it was alive and real, and he didn’t know what to do about it. She moaned and her nails dug into his chest through his shirt. She kissed the spot under his ear and reached down between them, cupping his cock and squeezing gently.
He closed his eyes and groaned. “Red…”
If he did this—if he took her now, everything would be different. He would be different. When this wedding was over, if she didn’t want to see him again…he’d be a shell of a man. He should walk away now. Keep himself protected and free. This thing between them was supposed to be a onetime fuck.
A scratching of an itch, just like he’d said.
But it felt like more.
And if he wanted more, he should say so up front. He should come up with a plan to have more, because after this wedding was over, they’d be in different states. But the words wouldn’t come, and instead of pushing her away, he brought his lips to hers, kissing her sweetly. They could talk later, damn it. When she wasn’t touching him and so damn close he couldn’t stop himself from touching her. From taking what she offered.
She massaged his cock with one hand, and the other rested over his heart. Rolling her underneath of him, making sure to move slowly enough that he didn’t injure her ankle even more, he situated himself between her legs before deepening the kiss. With his free hand, he unzipped the bag so they could move more easily.
She ran her fingers down his back gently, her featherlight touches driving him mad. He slanted his mouth over hers and slid his hand under her shirt, needing to touch her bare skin. She trembled and arched into his hand, wanting him to touch her more.
And fuck, he wanted to, too. Everywhere.
She deepened the kiss, the heel of her good leg digging into his ass, and rubbed against his cock. Knowing her heat was just a few scraps of clothing away made his stomach clench with need, a need that if left unanswered would eat him alive. He broke free of their kiss and bit down on her shoulder, then lower, on the swell of her breast.
Maybe this was a bad idea, but he couldn’t stop now.
She yanked his shirt off impatiently. He freed his head from the garment, and took off her shirt, too. Next came the bra, followed by the rest of her clothes. His followed, and soon they were naked in the woods. Again.
Next time, he’d make sure they were in a fucking bed.
He grabbed a condom before they got too hot and heavy, but the whole time he reached for one, her fingers worked over him. She ran her hands over his back, and slid forward to close around his cock again. “Now, Tyler.”
He moved up a tiny bit and sucked on her nipple, hard and fast. She let out a mewling sound and urged him closer. He sucked harder, using his teeth to create a friction for her. Her head tossed back and forth, and she panted into the night air. When he bit down gently on the extended bud, she shrieked and arched her back even higher.
Begging him for more, just like he liked it.
He pulled back and slid his fingers in between her legs. She was soaking wet, hot and inviting. He wanted nothing more than to bury himself inside her and forget about everything but making her moan his name. But she wasn’t ready yet.
He needed to make her scream again.
He moved to her other breast and scraped his teeth against her sensitive nipple, not stopping until she squirmed and begged. Still not enough.
“Tyler.” When she whimpered and raked her nails down his back, he thrust a finger inside her at the same time he sucked her nipple hard. She screamed and dug her heel into the ground, her other leg straight out.
Groaning, he removed one finger, replacing it with two. “You’re mine. Say it.”
“God, I’m yours.” She yanked at his hair, pulling him up for a kiss. “All yours.”
“Fucking right.”
He captured her mouth and thrust his tongue into her mouth in tune with his fingers. As his fingers pumped inside her, he broke off the kiss and situated himself between her legs, sliding down her body inch by torturous inch. He traced a damp finger down her slit before thrusting it inside. He watched as her muscles clenched down on his finger, the pink sweetness begging to be touched. To be licked. The sight drove him fucking wild.
His. All his.
The second his mouth touched her, she cried out and clenched down hard on his finger. He flicked his tongue over her clit, savoring her sweet taste.
She shuddered and clung to him. “Again, Tyler.”
He pulled his fingers out and plunged them again. Hard. At the same time, he closed his mouth around her clit and sucked. As he rolled his tongue over her, never breaking suction, he moved his fingers, hard and fast.
There was no going easy on her. Not anymore.
He could feel how close she was to coming. Could feel it in the way her muscles clenched down, squeezing his knuckles. He deepened his intimate kiss, rolling his tongue over her again and again until she cried out and came against his lips. Even though he wanted nothing more than to drive inside her right away, he hesitated.
Her back was scratched up and her ankle hurt too much for her to be on top.
When she relaxed, he withdrew and flipped her over onto her knees with one smooth motion. He pressed the tip of his sheathed dick against her clit and bumped it once, twice, a third time. She screamed out and climaxed again, her nails scratching at the dirt in front of her.
As she convulsed, he entered her from behind, burying himself completely. Her warmth surrounded him, and he curled his hands around her hips. Holding her in place, he slammed inside her again. He moved faster, harder and harder, and her cries grew louder and louder.
“Mine,” he growled, slapping her ass gently. “Say you’re mine, or I’ll stop.”
She cried out. “I’m yours, damn it. Harder. More.”
Fuck yeah, he’d give her more. He slapped her ass again, harder this time, and pumped his hips relentlessly. No breaks. No mercy. She screamed and came again, her walls clenching down on his cock so hard she almost pushed him out.
His balls grew tight and hard, and his breath came faster, and he moved faster, too. His entire body strove to reach the end of this crazy ride she’d led him on, and he bit down on her shoulder. Her body went stiff under his again, and he pulled out of her, only to slam back inside her with one sure, deep stroke.
Then? He found heaven on earth.
Everything faded away but the pleasure taking over him and he collapsed on top of her. When he came back down from his high, he withdrew from her and helped her lie down again. Hesitantly, he lowered his head and pressed a soft kiss against her lips. The other times they’d kissed had been in the heat of passion. Kissing her after sex felt awkward, weird, and yet somehow…fucking perfect as hell.
She kissed him back after a second, her own mouth moving over his uncertainly. When he pulled back again, she blinked up at him, looking confused and lost. He felt the same way right now. As if he didn’t know what way was up and what way was down. She’d tossed him off his axis, and he didn’t know what to do next.
So he did what he did best. He let go of her. “I’m going to get rid of this.” He gestured to the condom and rolled to his feet. “I’ll be right back.”
She nodded and sat up, gathering her clothes silently. He swallowed hard and went i
nto the shadows, feeling like the world’s biggest fool. All this time he’d been telling her he wasn’t looking for a relationship. And now? He couldn’t think of anything but being in one with her. Only her.
She had to be his forever.
For the first time in his adult life, he would be spending the night with a woman in his arms. He’d never wanted to have that intimacy before. Never wanted a girl to stick around long enough to spoon, for fuck’s sakes.
But with Christine, he was actually looking forward to it.
They were living in the same country now. Sure, he’d just accepted a job in Portland, and she lived here in Boulder, but it was a hell of a lot closer than they’d been before. Why couldn’t they make this something more than a fling? Why couldn’t they try? There was obviously an attraction between them that withstood the years of separation they’d put themselves through.
Why not try for more?
He came back into the clearing and saw her sitting there, hugging her knees. She glanced up at him, her eyes dipping low over his body. In some weird, sick, twisted way, he was grateful that they’d been stranded together, forcing him to sleep with her in his arms…
Even if he’d never actually spent the whole night with a woman before.
He was glad she would be his first. The question was…could she maybe be his last, too? Slowly, he crossed the clearing and stoked the fire, his blood rushing through his veins as he did so. He could feel her gaze burning into his back the whole time he worked. For some reason, the fact that he was going to sleep with her felt more intimate than sex itself.
What if he snored? He had no idea.
He finished with the fire and squatted next to the blaze for a second, his hands out to the heat, before glancing over his shoulder. “You look tired. You should sleep.”
“Come over with me?” she asked so softly he almost didn’t hear her. She yawned and covered her mouth. “I’m cold, and I won’t be able to sleep without you.”
Falling for the Groomsman Page 11