by Robin Roseau
I looked up, seeing her jaw more than her eyes. "I need to know. Are we all right?" I asked her.
She looked down into my eyes. "Yes, little fox. We are perfect. Was what you told Vivian true? This is when you feel safe?"
"It's when I don't fear," I said. "Hold me tighter." She squeezed just a little more firmly, always careful with me. "Lara, there used to be only one thing I feared: wolves."
"Do you still fear wolves?"
"Yes, just not every wolf. But now there is something I fear more than that."
"Oh honey."
"I fear you won't love me."
"You can banish that fear. It won't happen." I didn't say anything. "Honey, you know that, don't you?"
"Sometimes I do. Not often, Lara."
"How can you doubt?"
"Vivian already told you."
I felt Lara smile in victory. "Everything Vivian said was right, wasn't it?"
"Yes."
"Even the part where she told you that I loved you as much as you love me."
I pulled away slightly so I could actually see her face. "You keep forgetting how much I hate losing arguments."
"It's a good thing this wasn't an argument then."
She pulled me to her again, and I felt better, almost as if this might last. Even as I recognized the feelings, I knew they were fleeting. The doubts would return, but for now I was safe and I was loved.
I wriggled against her, settling in a little more, but my confidence returning and, along with it, an unhealthy amount of playfulness. Lara sensed the change but couldn't know what it may portend. I raised my mouth to the underside of her jaw and kissed her. Then I lowered my lips to her throat and kissed.
She stiffened slightly. "If I feel teeth, little fox-" she began to warn.
I nipped her throat.
She knew I was going to do it, and the reaction, as always, was instant. She bore me to the floor, swiftly, firmly, but with a great deal of care. She pressed me against the floor with her body and then her mouth was over my throat.
"Oh, my strong wolf," I said, clutching at her. I don't know when in our relationship I had begun craving it when she did this. I didn't like offering the submission, but when she took it like this, it filled me with happiness.
She held me like that, waiting for the whimper, the whimper I hadn't offered yet. She tightened her mouth slightly, reminding me she could crush my throat even as a human.
"Alpha, please mark me," I told her. "Mark me as yours."
She growled in her throat, a growl she reserved for me. Then her mouth shifted, slightly, and she bit the skin. I felt the puncture, a moment of pain. I gasped from it, but it had been what I wanted. I held her tightly.
She pulled away, and I opened my eyes to look at her. Her expression was glazed, and then she looked at my neck and her brow furrowed.
I reached a hand and caressed her cheek. "Thank you," I told her.
"I hurt you."
"No. You did what I asked."
"You asked me to hurt you." She examined my neck. "Shit, it's not healing."
"I don't heal as fast as you. It will be gone by morning, but everyone will see it tonight. Everyone will know whose teeth did this. Thank you." I smiled. "But perhaps I should lie here until you retrieve a cloth I can use until it stops bleeding."
She flew to the bathroom, returning immediately with a clean washcloth. She pressed it into place, then I put my hand over it, holding it there.
"Did I bleed into the clothing?"
She examined me. "No."
"Please help me up, then get ready. It will be done bleeding by the time you're ready."
She pulled me to my feet, but her brow was furrowed.
"Lara," I said. "This was protection. Listen to me. Protection."
"What?" she said.
"I wear the alpha's mark on me. I can't imagine a clearer message. This is you protecting me."
Her expression cleared, and she kissed my forehead. "You know that means I'm going to start doing it all the time."
I laughed. "Only when I invite you to."
She laughed and hurried to dress.
When we exited the house later, the limousine was waiting for us. Eric was driving, and Vivian was waiting for us by the back door. As I drew closer, she noticed my neck but didn't say anything. Once we were seated and rolling through the gates, she eyed it in a pointed fashion. "When did the two of you have time to get that distracted?"
Lara looked embarrassed, but I laughed. "I wanted to wear a clear message. I didn't think I should count on subtlety."
"So it was your idea?"
"Of course," I said. "You do know who the dominant one in our relationship is, don't you?"
Vivian laughed and Lara looked flustered. In response, I leaned against her in the car, resting my head against one of my favorite places: her shoulder.
"You are remarkably resilient, fox," Vivian said. "I see your confidence now and I compare this to little more than an hour ago. I can't believe this is the same person."
I shrugged one shoulder. "I don't like the person you saw an hour ago," I said. "I don't like being the scared fox. She comes out when I am losing control of my life. This is the fox you will see when I am the one in control."
We rode in companionable silence for a while, Vivian's eyes never leaving me. I knew she was studying me. I decided I didn't mind. Once we were on the highway, I shifted to look up at Lara. "Vivian has offered to allow me to visit her professionally."
"I thought she might," Lara said.
"Vivian, I don't know if I will be able to talk to you without Lara there."
"Will you be able to talk to me in front of her? And Lara, will you be able to hear everything the little fox needs to tell me."
"I've heard it before," Lara said.
"Not all of it," I said quietly.
"Have I heard the worst?"
"In some ways, yes," I said. "In some ways, no." I looked at Vivian. "Perhaps the first few times when she is along. Perhaps there will be days I need to tell you things she shouldn't hear."
"There are no things I shouldn't hear," Lara said firmly.
"There are, and I will be the one to decide, not you."
She pursed her lips but finally nodded.
"How do I pay you, Vivian?"
"You don't. You are pack. Pack helps pack."
I looked at her. "How many of your patients are pack?"
"I can't answer that," Vivian said.
"All right, of those members that are pack, what percentage of them do not pay you?"
She laughed. "Those whose jobs do not pay them enough to pay me."
"My job provides insurance," I said with a smile.
"I do not believe we want to submit paperwork to a human recording system," Vivian said.
"Don't argue with her, Michaela," said Lara. "Say thank you."
"Thank you, Vivian," I said, and we all smiled at each other.
I took a breath. "Who am I meeting?"
"The Chicago alpha and his two sons," Lara said. "They have a modest contingent of enforcers. The enforcers will not be eating and they will not be playing."
"Will the enforcers be in the room during the game?" I asked.
"Maybe two of theirs, two of ours," Lara said. "Six players. The three of us, the three of them."
"How badly are they going to be offended playing poker with a fox?"
"They extended the invitation to our best player," Lara said. "Without knowing who that is."
"And we're sure that's me?"
"Yes. Second best is Janice."
"And you, Vivian, instead of Elisabeth?"
"I am there for the same reasons you are, Michaela. To observe. I will see things you do not."
I nodded.
"Lara, if things go bad, I am not leaving your side."
"If things go badly, you will be whisked out of that room so fast your head will spin," she said in response. "I have already given those orders."
"Liste
n to me. If things go badly, you need every enforcer you have. And I need to be surrounded by every enforcer you have. If you send me away with two enforcers, that's two that could be helping you, but it's also only two protecting me. Frankly, if I need any protection at all, I need more than two."
"Damn it!" said Lara. "I need you safe."
"The safest place will be with you."
Vivian stayed out of it. "Damn it!" Lara said again. She pulled her phone out and made a phone call. I heard Elisabeth's voice. "Damn it!" she said into the phone.
"What did she do now, Alpha?" Elisabeth asked.
Lara relayed the conversation. "She's probably right," was Elisabeth's response. "Give her the phone."
I held out my hand even before Lara could turn to me. "You heard that?" Lara asked?
"Of course. A human would have."
Lara handed me the phone. "Little fox, will you follow my orders?"
"Yes, subject to the conditions just discussed."
"No. You will follow my orders, or we have a problem."
I thought about it. "You're right, Elisabeth. To the best of my ability, I will follow your orders."
"Good. In all situations, you will protect yourself. You will do everything you can to make sure Lara does not need to worry about you so she can worry about herself. She needs to know you will be safe, and that means you must do nothing foolish. She knows you can be very evasive. She worries when you are not evasive."
"Yes, Elisabeth. I can be very evasive. Is it all right if I bite the occasional hamstring while being evasive?"
She laughed. "As long as doing so in no way hinders your ability to evade."
"It won't. I promise."
"We have an agreement, Michaela?"
"Yes, Elisabeth. Here's the alpha." I handed the phone back to Lara. The two talked for a minute longer while I eavesdropped.
"We're not expecting things to go like that," Lara said to me afterwards. "But it is good to be prepared."
"Can we talk about something pleasant for a while?" I suggested. "Like when you're going to move the pack to Bayfield?"
Vivian snickered. "You know, that came up in council, too. There was even a certain amount of support for it, but economically it isn't feasible."
"I know," I said. "But I don't have a solution for myself. I'm not a Madison kind of fox." I leaned further into Lara. "I am tired of us being apart."
"Do not despair yet, little fox," Lara said quietly.
I looked up into her face, hope seeping back into my bones.
"We can't move the pack, but maybe, and I use that word cautiously. Maybe we can increase our presence there." Suddenly she began smiling, and then more than smiling. Her entire body lit up in joy.
"Tell me, Lara," I told her.
"I have to check some things first," she said.
"Give me a hint?"
"Not yet. It's only an idea, and I need to check if it's viable."
"I have cause to hope?"
"I think I can keep you doing what you love to do while also being with me most nights. Maybe not every night, but most."
"In Bayfield?"
"No more questions, little fox. We have arrived."
* * * *
I disliked the Chicago wolves on sight. Of course, the feeling was clearly mutual.
We met at a steak and seafood restaurant, another pack business, of course. Elisabeth met us curbside, flanked by a cadre of enforcers. Suddenly, everything was serious. The enforcers looked grim. I felt like I was in the middle of a bad mob movie. I decided to keep my mouth shut about it. I didn't like the idea I was playing the part of the mobster's moll.
Lara caught my expression though and asked me, "What's so funny?"
"I'm just wondering who is going to play me in the movie adaptation."
That broke the tension for just a moment, but then as a group we turned down the sidewalk. At the other end of the block, facing us, was a similar contingent of wolves, all males, and even from this distance, I could tell they were huge.
"Size does matter," I said under my breath.
"Some of the most dangerous creatures on the planet are exceedingly small," Lara said.
"That pack," I said, thrusting out my chin to point, "prides itself on one thing and one thing only. We can use that."
Vivian looked over at me. "Very astute. But don't underestimate their intelligence, little fox."
"Underestimating my foe is not one of my more prevalent weaknesses," I replied. "But look, the middle one, that's the alpha, isn't it? He's already thrusting out his chest, and those two flanking him are even worse. They're going to try to intimidate us with their size."
"Yes," Vivian agreed. "They are."
Then there was some signal I didn't see, and both groups were moving forward, meeting in the middle of the block. Polite words of greeting were exchanged between the alphas and the principals were introduced.
The Chicago alpha was Durian Grant. His sons were Jared and Avery. They already knew Vivian; I was introduced, and the wolves were unhappy to see me.
"You insult us with your plaything's presence," the Chicago alpha said.
"You requested our best player," Lara said. "You didn't specify race. We would not have insulted you with the second string."
"I could snap her like a twig," Avery said, sneering at me.
Lara, standing slightly in front of me, tensed her muscles. I laid a hand on her back before saying, "But you won't because you are a guest in our territory. Lara, is this restaurant everything I have heard?"
I had never heard a word about the restaurant, of course.
"Yes, I believe it is," she said.
There was fumbling at the door with different wolves jostling for position. I solved it by slipping past everyone and being the first through the door. That earned some snarls, and I kept my ears on high alert, but no one leapt after me.
Our numbers were even; four enforcers each for seven pack members total in each contingent, but physically we were at a disadvantage. Neither Vivian nor I were likely to hold our own in a physical altercation. We had brought brains against their brawn. Of course, we were in our territory, and I daresay the majority of the restaurant guests would be on our side, if push should come to shove.
This wasn't a good situation for them to start something.
We were seated in a back room, six of us at a round table large enough to offer some distance, two enforcers from each contingent in the room, two more waiting outside. The alphas sat between their respective lieutenants. I was on Lara's left, Vivian on her right. Closest to me was Jared. So far he had been quiet, and he didn't see to have his brother's testosterone problem. Elisabeth and Rory were with us; Eric and John waited outside. I would have expected Eric inside but then realized that he was the calmer between him and Rory, and we needed Eric to maintain order in the other room.
I decided that Avery was the one most likely to do something stupid. Jared would be the worst enemy but least likely to force us all in that direction. But I also decided Durian assigned greater value to his hothead son than his more contemplative offspring. That said quite a lot about Durian as well.
Waiters arrived, asking for our choice of drinks. Lara and Durian both ordered bottles of wine, and I quietly asked for lemonade and handed my wine glass to the waiter. Jared noticed, but no one said anything until the wine was poured and I was the only one holding something else.
"You refuse to drink with us?" Durian asked me gruffly.
"I am so small," I said, "even a tiny amount of alcohol goes right to my head. That might be all right, but when I get tipsy, I tend to shift. And then I run around the room yapping like a crazed Pomeranian. Lara tells me it is annoying and won't let me drink anymore."
"I hate Pomeranians," Lara said under her breath.
Durian guffawed. "Everyone hates Pomeranians. And not enough meat on their bones to make them worth it, either."
Jared eyed me with speculation, saying nothing.
L
ara ordered meals for both of us. I hadn't ordered in a restaurant since meeting her, although sometimes she asked me what mood I might be in. We both enjoyed the interplay, and I particularly enjoyed wondering what she might choose for me. She had made a few mistakes, but she had learned from them, and now I was always pleased with her choices. I ate things I may not have picked, but that was part of the fun.
She ordered a large steak for herself and roast chicken for me. Vivian ordered fish. The other three wolves all ordered steaks. "Bloody," said Durian.
Conversation was tense. Jared and I tended to stay out of it. Avery made comments proving he was both ignorant and stupid. Durian's comments were marginally better.
I didn't like the way he looked at Lara. I imagined they weren't happy to be across the table from three females. And then I asked myself whether that was throwing them off.
Our dinner arrived, all of it in wolf-sized portions. I transferred the amount I wanted onto a bread plate, sliding my big plate in front of me. Lara added a fox portion of her steak to my plate and helped herself to some of the chicken. Jared, Lara and Vivian ate modestly for wolves. Durian and Avery gorged themselves.
"Are you going to eat that?" Jared asked me, gesturing to the chicken.
I glanced at Lara to see if she wanted it. She ignored the exchange, so I told him, "Help yourself. I have a fox sized appetite, as you can see."
Jared took the plate, thanked me, and then slid it down the table to his father. Durian looked at it with disdain and would have shoved it away, but did so in a fashion Avery could grab it if he wanted. Avery wolfed down my remaining chicken.
Inwardly I smiled. Let him gorge himself. What little blood normally made it to fuel his brain would head to his stomach instead, making him even more stupid that he already was.
Conversation throughout the meal was strained. Durian asked about Lara's businesses and the health of the pack. Lara answered with unhelpful answers, directing questions back towards Chicago. Avery spent five minutes bragging about a chain of shopping malls he owned, but I wondered if they weren't falling into a state of disrepair. I started to wonder about the financial status of the Chicago wolves. I thought perhaps Durian and Avery lived off tithe and not their own merits.