‘You’ve never said before.’ Felicity looked down at her sister with interest.
‘I’m sorry. Perhaps it’s because I’ve been away.’ Catherine opened her eyes and looked up at her sister. ‘I’ve never liked it.’
Felicity opened the handbag she had been clutching and took out a pair of highly fashionable spectacles. These she arranged on her nose, and then took another good look at her sister.
‘James Grant used to call you Cat,’ she said.
Catherine looked up at her helplessly.
‘And you’ve just seen him.’ Felicity sat down on a footstool opposite her sister, her blue eyes owl-like behind the huge glasses.
‘And I’m sorry, big sister, but I’m going to tell you a few home truths.’
Catherine jerked upright, tiredness forgotten. ‘What do you mean?’ she asked, her voice automatically taking on the peremptory tone she had used so often when Felicity was a recalcitrant adolescent.
‘Look, Cat, I’m not a child any longer, and let’s face it, you were never my mother, anyway.’ Felicity edged her stool nearer and leant her chin on her hands. ‘I didn’t realise what was going on when we still lived in Sussex, but after we left I got a pretty good idea. You and James had something going, didn’t you?’
‘Felicity.’ Catherine gasped, aghast.
‘Well, you did. No good denying it. He used to gaze at you like a devouring panther and you used to blush and look away and avoid him. And then all of a sudden we left. Knowing you and your morals, I would say it was because you couldn’t face having an affair with a married man. Right?’
Catherine couldn’t even answer. Her whole world had been turned upside down in the past three days and here was her sister saying she had known more about it than Catherine herself.
‘So had you actually been to bed with him?’
Catherine almost choked.
‘No, I hadn’t,’ she almost shouted, leaping to her feet. ‘And I’d like to know just how you come to know so much about it anyway.’
‘Oh, I don’t. Just observation. I should think most people back at home knew as much as I did. After all, he and Diana were already pretty much on the rocks, anyway.’
‘What?’ Catherine’s brain was reeling. ‘James and Diana ...?’
‘Oh, come on, Cat. Everybody knew. Why do you think they had no children? They never got on. Everybody used to talk about James and his little flings, but there was nothing in that, really. It was Diana who had the affairs.’
Catherine closed her eyes.
‘I’m sorry, Flick, but you’re just going to have to enlighten me. How come I know nothing of this?’
‘Because you’re an innocent, darling.’ Felicity looked impish. ‘You were too busy being mother and father all rolled into one for me to get to know what life was all about. And when you fell for James – well. That was the end, as far as you were concerned, wasn’t it?’
‘How do you know all this, Flick? I just can’t believe it.’ Catherine got up and went to investigate the drinks cabinet, finding it far better stocked than when she left. ‘Drink?’
‘Designer water for me, love,’ said her sister. ‘It’s in the fridge.’
When Catherine returned with a mineral water for her sister and a glass of wine for herself, Felicity was curled up in one corner of the sofa with a cigarette. Catherine cast her a disapproving look and seated herself primly at the other end.
‘So, come on, tell me all,’ she prompted, sipping her wine.
Felicity shrugged. ‘There isn’t much to tell. Diana always had an eye for the men – not to mention the boys – and James had a thing about you. Everybody knew. When you insisted on leaving, it looked as though it had come to a head. I thought about it afterwards and guessed you wouldn’t have let things get that far, though. I was right, obviously.’
Catherine looked down into her wine and sighed. Yes, Felicity was right. And she had been wrong. About almost everything, it now appeared.
‘James was why you came home, wasn’t it?’ Felicity adjusted her glasses and squirmed further down in her corner, obviously ready for a good gossip.
‘Partly.’ Catherine refused to meet her sister’s eyes. ‘There’s quite a story behind it.’
‘Well, come on then,’ encouraged Felicity. ‘What’s it all about?’
‘It concerns Grandma.’
‘Well, it was her cottage,’ said Felicity, reasonably.
‘Not exactly.’ Catherine sighed. ‘I’ll have to tell you the whole story.’
Felicity’s reaction to Andrew’s story was more robust and less sentimental than her sister’s had been, but then, she had never been as close to Henrietta as Catherine, nor had she the disadvantage of seeing the similarities to her own situation. In fact, it was this aspect rather than any other that interested her.
‘You see? Perhaps James wasn’t the big bad wolf after all. Perhaps he really cared for you, like his uncle. Diana sounds a bit like his wife, doesn’t she?’
‘Well, you seem to know more about her than I do. I never heard any gossip.’ Catherine drained her wineglass.
‘You, my dear sister, are a cross between an ostrich and a dinosaur,’ grinned Felicity.
‘A dinosaur?’ Catherine looked, surprised.
‘Yes, dear. Look at your relationships with men, for instance. Circumspect to the point of nonexistence.’
‘Well, I don’t seem to meet any that I really like.’ Catherine lifted her chin defensively. ‘Anyway, I’ve never curtailed your activities, so I can’t be that out of touch.’
‘You’ve never had the chance,’ laughed Felicity. ‘But, anyway, to get back to this story, it turns out that it is James – the reason you’re home, isn’t it?’
‘Not altogether.’ Catherine compressed her lips.
‘Oh, come on, Cat. If he hadn’t been involved you would have accepted Andrew’s offer of a tenancy, wouldn’t you?’
‘Maybe, but I couldn’t have gone on paying £10 a year, could I? I would have had to have paid a fair rent, and I don’t think I could afford that.’
‘Why couldn’t you pay £10 a year? If that’s all that Andrew wanted?’
‘The estate belongs to James now,’ said Catherine shortly.
‘Ah, I see. But are you sure? Surely Andrew must retain a degree of control, or something?’
‘I suppose so.’ Catherine tried to be dismissive.
‘But what? Come on, there’s something else, isn’t there? What is it?’
Catherine stood up, restlessly. ‘Just something James said.’
‘Well?’ prompted Felicity.
‘He said he didn’t need non-paying tenants.’
‘Oh, Cat. He didn’t?’ Felicity’s eyes were wide with shock. ‘How awful.’
Uncomfortably aware that this wasn’t quite the whole story, Catherine went to pour herself another glass of wine, idly reflecting that she seemed to have consumed more alcohol in the past few days than she had in the last three months.
‘Actually,’ she said, her back still to Felicity. ‘There was a bit more to it.’
‘I’m glad to hear it.’ Felicity’s voice was sharp.
‘He was angry when he said it.’
‘With you?’
‘Yes. I’d said something silly.’
‘And you’re not going to tell me what?’ asked Felicity shrewdly.
‘No.’ Catherine had left out the embrace on the bridge.
‘So he said something equally silly back and you took it at face value? Honestly, Cat.’
‘That’s what he said.’ The words came out involuntarily and Catherine bit her lip.
‘Oh, I see. In fact, I think I see quite a lot.’ Felicity stood up and took off her glasses. ‘So this is why you ended up back here at midnight looking like a lost sheep?’
‘I’m sorry about Graham.’ Catherine was abashed.
Felicity shrugged. ‘Oh, he can take it. He wasn’t staying, if that’s what you mean. I don’t go in for that
kind of relationship.’ She grinned at her sister and put her head on one side. ‘After all, I’m still a bit young, aren’t I?’
Catherine laughed, went over and hugged her sister. ‘You sound years older than me, sometimes.’
‘Worldly wise, that’s me.’ Felicity gave her sister a kiss. ‘I’ve had to be. You wouldn’t believe how many boys – and men – think a pretty young orphan with only a sister to look after her must be fair game.’
‘And what about the sister? What do they think about her?’ asked Catherine, reseating herself on the sofa.
‘I think you scared most people off. You were so – so dedicated.’
‘Goodness.’ Catherine pulled a face. ‘No wonder I haven’t met many men. They obviously don’t want to be met.’
‘Don’t be silly. You’re incredibly attractive, you know that. All that red hair and hazel eyes. You know, sometimes, they look almost the same colour. Like marmalade.’
Catherine laughed. ‘Well, that’s not exactly flattering.’
‘Well, it was meant to be.’ Felicity sat back on her stool. ‘And you’ve got those wonderful eyelashes, freckles, and a lovely curvy figure.’
‘Don’t you mean plump?’ asked Catherine, amused by this prosaic description of her charms.
‘No, I don’t. You aren’t. You’ve got the sort of figure men really like. Not like mine. I’m all angles. And all this insipid blonde hair and blue eyes – eugh.’
‘Flicka,’ laughed Catherine. ‘You’re beautiful.’
‘I know how to make myself appear beautiful. That’s different.’
Catherine shook her head in repudiation, but said nothing.
‘Anyway, I shall have to leave you to sort out any further problems. I’m for bed.’ Felicity stretched. ‘Your bed’s made up.’
‘Really?’ Catherine was surprised.
‘I did it when I came home from work.’ Felicity smiled wryly. ‘I can be quite reliable, you know.’
‘I know you can, and a lot more sensible than me, sometimes.’ Catherine got up and kissed her.
‘Only because I can stand back from the situation in this case. You can’t, you’re emotionally involved.’ On her way to the door, Felicity turned back. ‘You can tell me to mind my own business, if you like, but do you think you’re still a little bit in love with James?’
Catherine returned her sister’s look steadily.
‘I didn’t know I ever was until tonight. Now I know I still am.’
This elliptical statement seemed to satisfy Felicity, and she nodded and went out of the door.
Catherine surprised herself by sleeping like a log that night and only waking when Felicity brought in a cup of tea. It being Saturday, and Felicity at home from work, both sisters were able to unpack Catherine’s belongings and, in the process of putting everything away, give the flat a slightly overdue spring-clean.
Over an Indian take away supper that Felicity had insisted on – to Catherine’s surprise Graham had been put off for this evening – Felicity returned to the subject that had been carefully avoided by both of them all day.
‘So, have you made up your mind?’
‘About what?’ Catherine forked up pilau rice.
‘Going back.’
‘I already had.’ Catherine looked up.
‘I thought you might have had second thoughts in the cold light of day.’ Felicity shrugged.
‘You don’t want a dinosaur of a sister cluttering up the place?’ grinned Catherine.
‘Don’t be stupid. I just thought you might have been able to look at things objectively, now that you’re away from the situation.’
‘I can’t go back.’ Catherine sighed. ‘If it were just Andrew, I might be able to work something out, but I can’t go back with James still there.’
‘Because he doesn’t want you there?’
‘Because now I know how I feel about him it would be madness. I would be putting myself at risk the whole time.’
‘How?’ Felicity stopped eating, looking interested.
‘Every time I saw him it would be painful. You must see that.’
Felicity nodded.
‘And if I let him see how I felt – well, he could take advantage of it, couldn’t he?’
‘To get you into bed?’ Felicity ignored Catherine’s wince. ‘Yes, I see what you mean. But would that be so bad? That’s what you want, after all, and you’re a grown-up lady, now.’
‘No! ’ Catherine banged down her fork. ‘Can’t you see? Even if the gossip were true, James is still a married man. I don’t want to be a bit on the side. And even if he wasn’t married, he’s not the sort to be thinking of a permanent relationship. In fact,’ Catherine leant back in her chair and gazed reflectively at the ceiling, ‘if he wasn’t married, I doubt whether he would ever have been interested in me in the first place.’
‘Oh, stop putting yourself down,’ said Felicity, irritably.
‘I’m not. I’m just being honest.’ Catherine returned to her meal.
After a few moments silence, Felicity gave her sister a tentative glance and said offhandedly, ‘I’m going home for the day, tomorrow. Why don’t you join me?’
‘To Sussex?’ Catherine looked up, surprised.
‘I often go down. I have lunch with Mary and we go to the tennis club. I like to keep in touch.’ Felicity looked down at her plate, her hair falling to hide her face.
Catherine gazed at her quizzically. ‘I didn’t realise you felt so much for the old place.’
Felicity shrugged.
‘Why didn’t you tell me before? Were you so unhappy about moving?’
‘It was home.’ Felicity’s voice was gruff. ‘But we couldn’t afford for me to be up here and you down there. I knew that.’
Panic measures, James had called it. Catherine felt the burden of guilt added to everything else she felt.
‘Yes, of course I’ll come.’ She reached across and took Felicity’s hand. ‘But Mary’s mother won’t want to feed both of us. Can we eat out?’
Felicity looked up and laughed. ‘Not Mary’s mum. Mary. She’s been married for nearly a year. I went to the wedding, remember?’
‘Goodness, yes. I’d forgotten. Who did she marry – anyone we knew?’
‘No, someone she met at college. Paul Gregory. He’s smashing.’
‘But she’s so young.’ Catherine shook her head.
‘Not that young. She’s older than me, don’t forget. She’s 21 now.’
‘And already been married a year. Will it last?’
‘Cat. Whatever’s made you so cynical? Why shouldn’t it?’ Felicity glared reprovingly at her sister.
‘Sorry. I was just thinking of James and Diana.’ Catherine had to clear her throat on the last words.
‘Oh. I see.’ Felicity frowned. ‘Of course, Diana was quite young when they married, wasn’t she?’
‘I think so. They seemed to have been married for ever when we knew them.’ Catherine dragged her thoughts away. ‘Right. Shall we clear up?’
But Felicity was still looking thoughtful.
‘Well, at least James won’t be around if he’s still at the village, and with any luck we can find out what’s going on with him and Diana. What’s the betting she doesn’t want to go?’
‘Flick ,’ said Catherine warningly. ‘Don’t you start interfering.’
‘No, I won’t.’ Felicity stood up. ‘You clear away. I’ll go and ring Mary.’
‘Thanks,’ Catherine said wryly to her sister’s departing back, and began to gather up the plates.
Catherine had not slept so well that night, a fact not unnoticed by her sister.
‘Pity the weather changed when it did. Just in time for the weekend as usual. You could have done with a bit of sunshine to cheer you up. You look like something the cat’s dragged in.’
‘Thanks,’ said Catherine grimly.
‘And you can’t even hide those eyes behind sunglasses in the pouring rain, can you?’ Felicity was breezily m
atter-of-fact. ‘Never mind. I’ll drive. You look as though you’ve got a headache.’
‘I have. A blinder.’ Catherine closed the offending eyes, reflecting that misery was exceedingly bad for the health.
‘Well you doze off on the journey. There won’t be much to look at in this.’ Felicity peered despondently out of the window. ‘Come on.’
In tune with her mood and the weather, Catherine had put on a black jacket and trousers over a white top, and apart from remarking that she looked as though she was going to a funeral, Felicity gave it as her considered opinion that she looked pretty good, even with her hair back in that long plait. Catherine hadn’t, in fact, worn her hair like this since she had left work, but today its severity suited her mood. Felicity, by contrast, looked like a beautiful butterfly, in the lilacs and pinks that suited her colouring so well, this time as draped silky trousers and a flowing jacket that was the absolute opposite of Catherine’s tailored looks.
Catherine did doze on the journey, although her sister seemed to have forgotten her injunction and kept up a steady flow of chatter all the way. However, as they began to get nearer, Catherine sat up, peering cautiously at the familiar landscape. As she had told James, she did go back occasionally, but it had been over a year this time, and a few changes had taken place. As they passed the old Hamilton’s factory, now Concept Communications, she bit down hard on her lip, remembering all too clearly the way, in the past, she had always looked for James’s big black BMW parked at the front. When it hadn’t been there, she had been unaccountably bereft, as though at least if she knew where he was, everything was all right. Only everything hadn’t been. And now, she did know where he was, and it made it worse.
Mary and Paul lived in one of the tiny cottages near the town centre, bright with new paint and hanging baskets of flowers. Mary, looking absurdly young to be a married woman, welcomed them both, offered them coffee and told them that they had arranged to go to the golf club for drinks.
‘Paul’s just become a member, ’ she said proudly as her young husband coloured faintly pink with embarrassment.
Felicity gave Catherine a sideways look. The golf club had always been one of James and Diana’s preserves. Catherine returned the look with a rueful grin and turned to Mary.
Running Away Page 6