If I change her, maybe she’ll feel the bond, maybe—
No! He angrily broke the thought off. She’ll have the life she chooses, even if it’s not with me.
But that didn’t mean he couldn’t try to win her. He just wasn’t sure how to go about doing that, and with the way he felt, he might only push her away from him.
“I can take you somewhere else,” he offered. “Anywhere.”
“You said you wanted to stay close to the city.”
“The Savages have to be taken care of, but I will take care of you first.”
“I have a job. That might not be much of a concern in your world, but I can’t warp Mrs. Mackey’s mind into believing I paid my rent, and air doesn’t fill my belly. I have to return to work.”
“You can’t return without putting yourself at risk.”
Maggie slung the towel over her shoulder. “Can I ever go back?”
He stared at her, his eyes hooded and his body tensed. The crunch of metal drew her attention to where he’d placed his hand on the other side of the doorframe, but she couldn’t see what had caused the noise.
“I will do everything I can to give you the life you deserve,” he said.
“Why?”
“Because you deserve it.”
“You don’t know that; you don’t know me.”
“No, but you didn’t know me either when you tried to save my life.”
“It’s my job to help others.”
“Yes, and mine is to protect the innocent from those of my kind who would destroy them. Where would you like to go, Maggie?” he asked to distract her from questions that were edging perilously close to his connection with her.
“If I can’t go home, then I would prefer to stay here. I won’t be locked up in some vampire compound. I also want to see my mother. Today if possible. I have to get it over with.”
“We will do that then. The next time you decide to go for a run, or leave your room, will you let me know you’re going?”
The look of concern in his eyes buried the resentment swelling within her. He was only trying to protect her, and no matter how much she disliked it, for the time being, she might need his protection.
“Yes,” she said.
Aiden lowered his hand and stepped away from the door when she approached him. As she left the gym, she looked up, and her eyes widened on the dents his fingers had left in the metal trim around the door. She gazed questioningly at him, but he didn’t say anything as he turned and strode down the hallway.
CHAPTER 28
Maggie hadn’t believed she would get any sleep, but after returning to her room and showering, she fell onto the bed and passed out. Dreams of Aiden haunted her again, and she woke feeling achy with desire for him. If he’d been in the room with her, she would have screwed him, bad decision or not.
Her tongue poked at her canines as she recalled her last dream of him. A dream in which she’d sank her fangs into his throat. The memory was so real; she could almost taste the rush of his blood against her tongue.
Maggie moaned and shoved the pillow over her face when she recalled they’d been having sex while she drank from him. She bit her lip to hold back anymore sound as she threw the pillow aside and shoved herself out of bed. She didn’t glance at the doorway separating their rooms; she might make a beeline for him if she did.
What a strange, sensual dream to have, and what a weird thing to have turn her on. But then, she supposed it wasn’t all that bizarre to have the idea of feeding on Aiden stimulate her. She did have vampire DNA after all.
She’d known for years raw meat and the blood from it invigorated her, but was she starting to need more than that? Would she have to start drinking human blood too?
The idea of consuming a stranger’s blood repulsed her; the idea of feeding on Aiden had her running her hands over her bare breasts as she imagined it was him stroking her in such a way.
Maggie flipped the switch in the bathroom and stood before the mirror to inspect her reflection. Small shadows circled her eyes, but the rest of her looked the same. Opening her mouth, she examined her teeth in the mirror. They didn’t lengthen into fangs when she poked them with her tongue.
“Am I becoming a vampire?” she asked her reflection, but it had as many answers as she did.
She’d have to ask Aiden.
When she stepped into the shower, she continued to imagine Aiden’s hands running over her body as she stroked herself to an orgasm that somehow left her unsatisfied. She turned the water colder than normal and stood beneath it as she tried to rid herself of the horrible, unfulfilled desire plaguing her.
Hopping out, she hurried to get ready. She fed Blue and glanced at the clock on the bedside table. It was almost one. She’d slept longer than she’d expected, but she would be able to get in to see her mother until five.
She could pretend it was a wasted day and push the visit off until tomorrow. If she had any chance of spending more than an hour with her mother, she would have done that. However, if this visit were anything like her last one, she’d be there for less than half an hour. She’d rather get it over with today and maybe, during this visit, she would at least get some closure.
The idea of closure made her chuckle. How could she get closure from a woman who screamed for garlic when she learned her daughter had come to visit?
Taking a deep breath, Maggie tugged at the end of her sweater and knocked on the door dividing their rooms. After a few seconds, it opened to reveal Aiden on the other side. She’d tried to prepare herself, but the sight of him still sent her heart into her throat. All her dreams came back to her in a flood of erotic memory.
Aiden’s nostrils flared when the scent of her arousal hit him, and color crept into her cheeks. His hand clenched on the doorknob as his dick hardened in response to her need. Her eyes fluttered away before coming back to him.
“I overslept,” she murmured.
“You needed it.”
“Yes, I… ah… yes.”
Maggie glanced at him from under the long fringe of her thick, red-tipped lashes. Without thinking, he released the knob and clasped her chin to stroke her cheek with his thumb. Tranquility descended over him as her mouth parted and he heard the increased beat of her heart.
Unable to stop himself, his eyes drifted to the slender column of her throat and the vein running through there. Before he could slide his hand to her nape to draw her closer, she stepped away from him. His hand fell to his side, and he gripped the knob again.
“I want to see my mother,” she stated. “I should get it over with.”
The rush of her words and the frantic uncertainty he heard within them buried his disappointment over her avoidance of him. For Maggie, this visit was a thing of intense dread. Aiden stepped back, and with a wave of his hand, he gestured her into the room.
When she entered, her gaze fell on his unmade bed, and the erotic sights and sounds of her dream flitted across her mind again. She tore her eyes away from the bed, but then her attention returned to him. And he was far more alluring than any dream.
The sweatpants he wore hung low on his hips, revealing the trail of hair from his belly button to the waistband as well as the V shape of his muscles pointing her directly where to go. Shirtless, sweat glistened on his chest as he closed the door. His arm brushed hers when he strode past her to grab the towel hanging over the chair in the corner. He wiped off his hair and chest before draping the towel over his shoulder.
“Did I interrupt something?” she asked.
“I was just working out, doing some push-ups and sit-ups.”
“Oh. I can wait until later. The place doesn’t close until five.”
“I’m done.”
He didn’t tell her he’d been doing them to keep from going for her. She’d filled his dreams, and his persistent erection made sleeping difficult. No matter how many times he jerked off, his shaft still roused when his mind wandered to her. He’d never believed it would be possible for someone to
have him so wound up yet so at ease, but Maggie did both those things to him.
“I’ll take a shower, and we’ll go,” he told her.
Maggie watched as he walked into the bathroom. Clasping her hands together, she tried not to think about him standing naked beneath the water when it turned on, but the more she tried not to picture it, the more she imagined the water sluicing off his body.
Dangerous or not, bad decision or not, she didn’t know how much longer she’d be able to resist this vampire.
• • •
“Can I turn into a vampire?” Maggie asked as she watched the cars rushing through the intersection.
Aiden hit the gas when their light turned green. “If you lose enough blood and are given the blood of a vampire, yes, you can become one.”
“No, I mean, if I’m a half-vampire, can I start to turn into one at will or something?”
“No. You would have to go through the transformation, the same as everyone else does.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.” He glanced over at her, sensing more behind her question. “Why do you ask?”
“I had the strangest dream last night,” she murmured. “And I didn’t know if it would be possible for me to transition into a vampire at will or something. Blood has helped to strengthen me for years without me knowing why, so if I drank enough of it, would it turn me?”
“According to Ronan, you still need to be changed from mortal to immortal by a vampire. You can’t spontaneously make the transition. What was your dream about?”
“I dreamt I bit something, and I had fangs when I did it. It felt very real.”
She didn’t look at him when she revealed this, and a flush of rosy color bloomed on her cheeks. He’d give anything to know what she’d dreamt.
“Does garlic work to keep vampires away?” she asked.
He chuckled and shook his head. “About the same as a person who eats excessive amounts of it would deter you.”
“Got it. What about crucifixes and stuff?”
“Why do you ask?”
Maggie fiddled with the edge of her sweater as she focused on the traffic. “There are things out there possibly hunting me. I should know what can hurt them. Plus…”
“Plus what?” he prompted when her voice trailed off.
“The last time I saw my mother, she started screaming for garlic when she realized who I was. So, I was wondering, if it did work against vampires, would it also work against me somehow? I mean, I’ve eaten garlic before and held a cross, of course, but maybe if a person believes it will ward off a vamp, it really will. I think I read or saw somewhere that it’s more the person’s faith in the object working than the actual object, so is that true?”
His fangs pricked at this revelation. Maggie’s mother had endured a trauma many wouldn’t have survived. It wasn’t her fault she was so messed up, but he would gladly kill the woman if she upset her daughter again today.
“No, that’s not true. There’s nothing she could use against you. You are still more human than vampire, and if you were a vampire, only an invite would hold you back unless you were a Savage, and then as I explained before, sunlight and the other things would affect you more.”
“Good.”
CHAPTER 29
Maggie felt like a dead woman walking as she stared at the brick building before her. You don’t have to do this!
Yes, you do.
She knew she did. She had to face her mother again, her past, her heritage, everything she’d written off years ago. Opening the car door, she didn’t pause to think before shoving herself out of the vehicle. Her shuffling gait took her from the car and to the bluestone walkway of the building. She didn’t look at Aiden when he fell into step beside her.
“Shortly after my mother killed the nurse, she was deemed incapable of standing trial due to insanity. They placed her here, in this high-security mental facility, which is essentially a fancier prison. If she’d gotten better, they might have freed her, but I don’t think she’ll ever leave this place.”
Aiden’s gaze traveled over the brick building with its brown vines creeping up the walls. They were most likely ivy vines, but their leaves had yet to bloom so he couldn’t tell for sure. Neatly trimmed boxwoods lined the walkway as they approached the glass front door. When they stopped before the door, the brass plaque on the wall beside it revealed the building was completed in 1852, but he saw nothing marking the name of the place or its purpose.
“It’s nice, for a state-run facility,” Maggie said.
She chewed on her bottom lip as she fiddled with her sweater again. He’d seen her jump-start a Savage with paddles in the ambulance and tell a vampire to pretty much fuck off without so much as breaking a sweat. Now, her skin was ashen and she looked petrified as she rambled.
“I was impressed with it when I came before,” Maggie continued. “Don’t get me wrong, most of the group homes I stayed in were okay, but you know, this is a place for those with mental illness. The people here are the ones the rest of the world prefers to forget. Everyone loves and feels sorry for kids who have nothing; they’re terrified of the mentally ill.
“So, when I first came here, I was expecting, you know, broken windows, dirty floors, and people leaning out the windows screaming. It’s not like that. It’s…. Oh, it doesn’t matter what it’s like. I should go in now. I probably won’t be long.”
“I’m coming with you.”
“You don’t have to do that. I’m glad you brought me here, but you don’t have to deal with this.”
Steely resolve filled Aiden’s gaze. “I am coming with you.”
“I doubt there’s a threat in there.”
“I do too, but I’m not going with you because of that. You shouldn’t be alone for this.”
Maggie opened her mouth to protest further. She didn’t want him to see her mother, or hear the things the woman might say, but more than that, she didn’t want to be alone for this. It could be humiliating to have Aiden with her, yet she’d get through it better with him by her side.
“Okay. Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me,” he said. “Don’t ever thank me for caring about you, Maggie, or being here for you.”
She was about to ask him why he would do this for her or care about her when the door opened and a young man stepped out.
“Oh, hello,” he said as he held the door open for her. Maggie recognized the subdued tone of his voice as someone who had been to hell and back. He probably had a loved one inside, and not a loved one who worked here.
When she remained unmoving, unable to take the door from the man, Aiden gripped it. “Thank you,” Aiden said.
The man didn’t respond as he shoved his hands in his pockets and shuffled away with his shoulders hunched up to his ears. That’s exactly how she’d walked the last time she left here.
“Maggie?” Aiden inquired.
Tearing her attention away from the man, she stepped inside the vestibule before continuing to the door across the way. Before she could reach the door, a buzzer sounded, and a man wearing white scrubs opened it for her. Maggie entered the front reception area and walked toward the desk. So polished, the white tile floor was nearly blinding in the overhead fluorescents glaring down on it.
“Can I help you?” the cute blonde woman sitting behind the desk asked her.
“Yes, I’m here to see Jane Doe,” Maggie replied in a steadier voice than she’d anticipated.
If the woman was at all astounded her mother had a visitor, she hid it well. She focused on her computer while her fingers flew across her keyboard. “And you are?”
“Her…” Maggie paused to pull at the collar of her sweater. “I’m her daughter.”
This time, the woman couldn’t hide her surprise as her eyes flew back up to Maggie. She didn’t doubt that most, if not all the people working here, knew her mother’s story and, therefore, part of hers. It wasn’t this woman’s fault, of course, but Maggie resented the woman’s kno
wledge she was the child Jane tried to cut from her belly.
“Can I see some ID?” the woman asked as she worked to cover her shock.
Maggie’s heart sank. She’d completely forgotten she’d required ID to get in here before. She wanted to kick herself in the ass. It wasn’t exactly a tiny detail she’d overlooked, and she had no idea when she’d get her license back.
Aiden rested his hand on the small of her back and stepped closer to the desk. The woman’s eyes widened on him and she smiled sweetly.
“I have our ID right here,” Aiden said. Reaching into his pocket, he removed his wallet and pulled out a license and credit card. “Here is mine,” he pointed to the license with his picture and a fake name. “And here is Magdalene Doe’s.” He indicated the credit card.
Maggie hadn’t heard the tone of his voice change, but there was a subtle shifting in him and a flow of power rippled across her skin. The woman gazed at the cards he held before her. Maggie realized he was holding them so the security cameras couldn’t see them
The woman’s brow furrowed in confusion. “I’m not sure where the license number is on Magdalene’s.”
“It’s right here,” Aiden said and pointed to the credit number. As he pointed, he read off a set of numbers and letters that weren’t on the card at all.
“Oh, yes. I see it now,” the woman murmured, and her fingers flew over the keyboard once more.
Maggie didn’t realize she’d stopped breathing until her lungs started burning. Aiden’s hand pressed more firmly into her back when her breath exploded out of her. She’d never tried LSD, but she had the unsettling feeling she was taking a strange trip.
Aiden turned toward the orderly who had buzzed them in when the man was drawn forward by his exchange with the receptionist. “Everything is fine,” Aiden said to him. “Return to the doorway.”
Maggie’s skin crawled when the man retreated. A muscle in Aiden’s jaw twitched as he met her gaze. He seemed to be bracing himself for condemnation from her. What she’d seen unnerved her, but he’d done it for her, and he hadn’t hurt anyone.
Ravaged (Vampire Awakenings, Book 7) Page 17