by Deb Kastner
Now his gruff manner was replaced by gentle empathy for the kittens.
Best of all was the way one corner of his lips tugged up in a half smile as he watched the tiny fur-balls sleeping all curled up against their mama. That grin changed his whole countenance, the difference between midnight and dawn. He was quite attractive when he smiled.
She didn’t want to notice.
She didn’t want her stomach to flutter in his presence. Not like it had when she was a silly love-struck teenager. This was different, and hazard signs were all over this road.
BEWARE, they warned, their blinking lights flashing. SHARP TURN AHEAD.
Chapter Four
It had been an interesting two weeks, he thought as he let himself into the store on Sunday morning.
“Do you still remember how to use this old dinosaur of a cash register?” Alyssa had asked him yesterday.
“Not much to remember, as I recall, other than counting change, and I think I can handle that,” he’d replied, trying not to let her see how stunned he was that they were having this conversation.
And then she’d really knocked him for a loop.
“I’ve got something for you,” she’d said, holding one hand behind her back. She’d had a twinkle in her eye and a smile on her face.
“What is it?” he’d asked, jabbing from side to side to try to grab her hand as she sashayed away from him with a laugh.
Suddenly her expression had become serious. “I’m going to give this to you because you have done everything I’ve asked from you and more. Since you volunteered to look in on the kittens on Sundays, you’ll need to have this.”
She withdrew her hand from her back. A sparkling new door key hung from her fingers.
She couldn’t possibly have known what that meant to him. His first two baby steps toward trust. He got all choked up even now, thinking about it.
He liked that he could give Alyssa the opportunity to enjoy her Sunday at church and with her family. He enjoyed the work at the store, and with careful budgeting for food and lodging, he intended to stash away most of his earnings for his baby.
Sooner or later, Sharee was going to have to respond to him, or else he was going to show up at her door unannounced. He was the baby’s father, and he suspected Sharee was trying to rob him of both the responsibility and the pleasure of taking care of his child.
That wasn’t going to happen.
He was even starting to picture what his life would be like if he settled down in Serendipity—at least in the off-season. If he continued to get his life together and didn’t mess up, perhaps he could retain shared custody of his baby.
The thought both elated and frightened him, but he knew that his friends and neighbors in Serendipity would offer support he wouldn’t find elsewhere.
Why hadn’t he seen the benefits of living in a small town until now? He’d matured, he supposed. And it had turned out that living off adrenaline wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.
He had seriously considered not returning to rodeo at all, and remaining in Serendipity, though he hadn’t asked Alyssa about the possibility of continuing to work for her.
She was such a sensitive individual that she might agree for altruistic reasons, and the last thing he wanted to do was pressure her into anything.
No. He needed to stick to the original plan. The whole reason he was in Serendipity in the first place was to polish his tarnished image, so he could return to rodeo. Bareback riding was ultimately his strongest skill set. He would need to provide for his baby, and rodeo was the best way he knew to do that.
He wouldn’t return to the rodeo circuit until January, giving him ample time and opportunity to brush up on his bareback-riding skills. When he did make his comeback, he would make sure he was wildly successful. He boarded a couple of horses in Serendipity’s public barn and corral and practiced his skills in the evenings and on his days off.
Serendipity had become his safe place, and Alyssa a close friend. She was the one person he could really talk to—although of course she still didn’t know about the darkest burden he carried in his soul. He wasn’t ready to tell her and doubted he would ever be. He protected and guarded his relationship with Alyssa because he feared if she knew the truth she’d send him packing so fast his head would spin.
He couldn’t take that risk, no matter how tempting it was to unburden himself.
Today, at least, he wouldn’t even have to worry about fighting the urge to blurt out his secret, because he wouldn’t see Alyssa at all.
He yawned widely as he walked into the back room to check on Fancy and the kittens. He’d been an only child, and his parents had moved to Scottsdale, Arizona, for their retirement, so he was living alone when he wasn’t working, renting a cabin at the Howell’s Bed-and-Breakfast, and the silence sometimes got to him.
Alyssa had invited him to visit the community church with her on more than one occasion, and he was seriously considering going back. Living in Serendipity with its slow pace had allowed him to ponder his life and where he would be going from here. Time had solidified his moral code and kept him walking the straight and narrow.
For the first time in years, maybe since childhood, the idea of being in a relationship with God wasn’t quite as far-fetched as it once had seemed. It appeared to be the natural next step in his quest for a better life, but he still wasn’t quite ready to darken the door of a church. Not until he was certain he could live up to the standards he’d created for himself.
As Alyssa had suggested that first day on the community green, the gossip hive had moved on to the Next Big Thing less than a week after the auction and he was old news.
The problem was that he was still judging himself. He alone knew how many times he’d been ready to sneak off and find a liquor store. He still balked at the idea of attending an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting, but he did see the wisdom in having a sponsor to talk to, someone who understood his addiction.
The corner of his mouth turned up in a half smile as he watched the kittens crawling over each other to be close to Fancy. Spending time with kittens wasn’t exactly the same as human contact, but at least they were furry and cute, and he could cuddle them in his arms. Their eyes were open now, tiny sharp teeth were emerging, and they were starting to toddle around on their own.
He might not be in church right now with the rest of the townsfolk, but he experienced a sense of peace nonetheless. He liked the quiet. Or the relative quiet, since the kittens were mewling.
Emerson’s, along with the rest of the businesses on Main Street, was closed on Sundays, which might have appeared strange to an outsider. But Cash had grown up in Serendipity and couldn’t imagine it any other way.
He’d laughed when Pete, in the middle of a photo shoot with Cash and the kittens, had mentioned how odd and backward it was, like a throwback to the nineteenth century. The town, with its clapboard sidewalks and old-fashioned storefronts, really did look like something from another era.
Cash filled Fancy’s dish with a can of cat food and mashed up a second one for the kittens to share. They were starting to wean themselves from their mother and were anxious to feast on the food Cash offered.
Cash pressed his back against the wall and slid down until he was seated next to the box containing Fancy and the kittens, immediately scooping the little black kitten with white-tipped paws into his lap.
“Hello, Maus,” he said, scratching behind the kitten’s ears.
No one had come forward to claim the litter, but he knew—and Alyssa knew—they would have to be adopted out to others when the time was right.
It was inevitable. Alyssa couldn’t keep a handful of full-grown cats inside her shop. And yet despite her smiles, he’d occasionally catch a glimpse of sadness in her eyes when she looked at them.
By the second day at the store, the kittens had all been named. The wh
ite one was Smudge, the calico was Aspen, the tortoiseshell was Bishop and the gray kitten was Socks.
Cash was surprised how invested he’d become in the fluff-ball litter. He liked all the kittens, but he’d personally christened his favorite Maus. The tiny kitten’s eyes were a mesmerizing blue-gray color that made Cash beam and Alyssa exclaim in delight.
All the kittens were adorable, and Cash had no doubt that even though they lived in the country where barn cats were a dime a dozen, they would have no problem finding homes for these little bundles of fur.
His thoughts turned to the day after they’d first found the litter. They’d put out a notice on the door of the shop and asked around town to find out if anyone was missing their cat, but no one had claimed Fancy, so as Alyssa had first suggested, Fancy had become the unofficial store mascot. Shoppers often stopped by with their children to exclaim over the kittens and they became a big draw.
“We’ve totally gotta do this,” Pete had insisted when he’d found out about the litter.
“What? Me and a cat?” Cash had asked dubiously. “What’s the big deal about that?”
“You and a kitten,” Alyssa had countered. “Trust me when I say a picture of you and Maus—Cash’s favorite kitten—will go a long way in scrubbing up your image. Ladies love seeing men with kittens.”
He didn’t care overmuch what ladies in general thought, but he did wonder if this photo shoot had any effect on Alyssa. Even though she was occasionally busy with customers, she’d watched as much of the photo shoot as she could. He’d felt ridiculous posing with a kitten on his shoulder, on the ground pawing at his jeans or tucked into his T-shirt. Whenever he’d felt Alyssa’s eyes on him, it had taken his mind off what he was supposed to be doing and he’d felt as if the temperature in the room had skyrocketed. Surely his face must have been flushed.
When his gaze had sought hers, he couldn’t tell if she’d been smiling or smirking.
“Good job,” she’d announced when he was finished. “Way to show your softer side.”
Cash had snorted. Talk about ridiculous. What did cradling a cat in his arms have to do with establishing a man’s personality?
Everyone liked kittens, didn’t they?
Cash didn’t have a soft side. His heart was as hard as stone.
The kitten currently curled on his forearm mewled his displeasure and bumped his head into Cash’s palm, only stopping to purr when Cash stroked his fingers across Maus’s fur.
Cash laughed. “Sorry, little guy. My mind wandered. You want my full attention, don’t you?”
If he had his way, Cash would adopt Maus himself, but he had nothing to offer a cat, or any other living thing, for that matter.
Traveling the rodeo circuit was no place for a pet, even—or maybe especially—one as independent as a cat. Maus was already starting to display his individuality from his brothers and sisters, and Cash often chuckled at his feistiness. Maus reminded Cash of himself.
From what he and Alyssa had read in their research about kittens, during the next eight weeks they would show great progress in their growth and personalities. He couldn’t wait to watch sweet Maus mature, but he reminded himself not to get too attached to the little guy. When the kittens were weaned, one of Emerson’s many customers, maybe a family with little children, would become Maus’s new owner.
And Cash might never see the kitten again.
His chest filled with an unrecognizable emotion as he placed Maus back in the box with his brothers and sisters. Before, part of the allure of the rodeo circuit was being in a different town every week, often in a different state.
Nothing the same. Everything new and exciting.
But these last couple of weeks working at Emerson’s with Alyssa, he’d experienced another side, a slower, gentler way of life, but no less rich for its leisurely pace.
His cell phone buzzed from the back pocket of his jeans. Not too many people had his number, and even less would be interested in calling him for any reason. It was probably Martin, demanding an update on Cash’s progress with the publicity campaign.
He glanced at the screen and was surprised to see Alyssa’s name. He’d given her his cell number when he’d first started at Emerson’s, so she could get in touch with him if she needed him at the store or for other work-related communications.
“Alyssa?” he asked, curiosity piquing his interest. Why was she calling him on a Sunday?
“Cash.”
All she said was his name, but he could clearly discern the note of panic in her voice.
“Alyssa. What is it? What’s wrong?”
“It’s Daddy,” she said, her breath catching on a sob.
A pure shot of adrenaline jolted through Cash, a feeling his body naturally embraced even as anxiety constricted his chest.
“What happened?”
Cash had always liked Edward Emerson. Cash hadn’t exactly been a model student and he had been known to get into trouble a time or two. But Edward had given Cash a job when many others turned him down as being too much of a risk. He’d planned to go over to the house and say hello, but the past two weeks had been busy.
“He fell.”
“Is it serious?”
“I don’t know. I wasn’t here when it happened. I’m afraid to move him. He won’t let me call an ambulance. I can’t get him up on my own, and I’m not even sure I should. I came over to the house to make lunch for us and I found him lying on the floor in the kitchen, crying out in pain. Eddie is out on a roundup this weekend and out of cell phone range.”
“Give me five,” Cash said, already rushing out the door and locking it behind him. He didn’t have any idea why she’d think to call him, but now wasn’t the time to ask. “Hang in there, Alyssa. I’ll be right over.”
His heart hammered brutally, and his mind spun with life-threatening scenarios as he jogged down the street toward the housing complex where Alyssa’s father lived. He half wished he’d brought his truck this morning, but he could probably make it faster on foot, anyway.
When he reached the Emersons’ house, he let himself in without knocking.
“Alyssa?”
“In here,” she called from the kitchen.
Cash dashed toward the sound of her voice. When he rounded the corner into the kitchen, he found Alyssa’s father sprawled across the well-worn rose-patterned linoleum, Alyssa on her knees bending over him and supporting his head.
Cash was shocked by Edward’s appearance, and it wasn’t only because he’d obviously taken a bad fall. Cash regretted that he hadn’t made it a point to stop by earlier.
The old man’s face was drawn and pale, his thinning white hair poking up in tufts. Though it was the middle of summer, he was dressed in thick flannel pajamas. His feet were clad only in socks, and Cash suspected that might be part of the reason he had slipped on the slick linoleum.
Cash brushed a comforting hand across Alyssa’s shoulder as he crouched down by Edward and she offered him a grateful nod.
“What happened?” he asked. He was addressing both of them, but his gaze fixed on Edward.
“He was leaning over to pick up a dishrag he’d dropped, and he lost his balance,” Alyssa answered.
“Stupid,” Edward muttered, his voice raspy and hoarse. He tried to sit up and then groaned in pain and rested his head back onto Alyssa’s lap.
“No, Daddy. It’s not your fault. It was an accident. It could have happened to anyone.” She tenderly brushed her father’s hair out of his eyes. Tears flooded her cheeks.
Cash’s chest clenched. He wanted to make those tears go away. Fix her problem. But that was easier said than done.
“You didn’t call an ambulance?” Cash confirmed.
“No,” Edward snapped. “No ambulance. No emergency room, either. I’m fine. Besides, it would take an hour to get to the nearest hospital, and all the
y’ll do is tell me I have bumps and bruises. Like that ain’t obvious.”
Cash didn’t know about the “fine” part, but Edward was right about the hospital. Unless it appeared that something was broken, he’d probably be better off, and a great deal more comfortable, just going straight to bed and resting.
“Can you sit up?” Cash asked.
“What if he has a concussion?” Alyssa whispered.
“I’m still here, and I can hear you perfectly,” Edward said. He chuckled coarsely and then winced and pressed his left palm into his ribs.
Cash met Alyssa’s gaze. “Did he hit his head when he fell? Did he lose consciousness?”
“I’m not sure. Daddy?”
“I didn’t knock myself out, if that’s what you’re asking. I’m pretty sure I didn’t hit my head, but it happened so fast I can’t be certain. I remember when I realized I was going to fall, I twisted to the side and tucked in my knees so I didn’t land on my back.”
“We can’t be sure you didn’t hit your head, then,” Cash said. He nodded toward Alyssa. “You may be right about a possible concussion. Let me call Dr. Delia and see what she thinks about moving him.”
Alyssa nodded gratefully.
Cash stepped out into the living room and called the town doctor, explaining the situation, asking whether they should move him or not and whether they’d made the right decision not to call 911.
Delia said she’d be right over and not to move Edward until she’d had the opportunity to check him out. If he needed to be transported to a hospital, she would call Ben and Zach, the local paramedics, from Edward’s house.
“Dr. Delia’s on her way,” he said as he reentered the kitchen. Alyssa gave an audible sigh of relief as he knelt down beside her and brushed a reassuring hand across her shoulder. He wished he could do more.
“I trust Dr. Delia. She’ll know what to do. I should have called her right away.” She frowned and shook her head and her tears started again in earnest. “I’m just not thinking straight. I was going to ring Eddie, but then I realized he was out of cell phone range. Then for some reason you popped into my mind.”