by J. M. Colail
When he entered the room again, Roz was leaning back against the wall, her knees dangling over the edge of the table. Scratching the back of his neck, Julian slumped into the chair she’d vacated. He set the clipboard down on the desk and faced her as directly as he could. “So, when’s the last time you got laid?”
Roz sat forward, hands on her knees. “What?!”
“You heard me. Trust me, this is relevant.”
“A little over six weeks ago, I guess. Why?”
There was not going to be an easy way to say this. Julian pinched the bridge of his nose with one hand. “Because you’re pregnant.”
He heard Roz’s sharp intake of breath and looked up to see her face had lost all expression. “What?” she said shakily. “Julian, I just had my….”
“But you’ve always been irregular,” he prompted. “And this one was different. Wasn’t it? Less steady?”
“Shit,” Roz said. “Oh, my God.”
“It happens sometimes during early pregnancy. Everything is probably fine, but of course I’ll do a sonogram to check.” Julian took a deep breath. “What’re you going to do?” he asked, abandoning all pretense at clinical detachment. “I mean, uh, what are you going to do? I’m guessing this wasn’t exactly planned.”
Roz slumped. “I don’t know! This is the sort of thing that only happens to other people!”
Julian meant to disagree; this was precisely the kind of thing that happened to Roz all the time, just not usually this seriously. But he couldn’t quite bring himself to tell her so at a time like this. “I, uh, do you know if there’s a counselor in town? I seem to have completely forgotten.” He just barely resisted the urge to pace.
“Um, Beanstalk—”
Julian looked up again, meeting her gaze. “Yes?” he hedged.
Roz was grinning slightly. “I’m gonna be a mommy.”
Oh, thank God. He breathed a sigh of relief and stood to sit beside her on the exam table. He put an arm around her shoulders and Roz leaned into him, wrapping her own arm around his waist. “Yeah, you are.”
“I guess that means I have to grow up, huh?”
“I think you can probably fake it ’til you make it.”
Against his shoulder, Julian felt Roz shaking slightly. At first, he thought she was crying—but then he heard her laughing. “God. Okay, okay, I can do this, but you have to tell Mom.”
“No deal,” he said. “You tell her. The only thing I did was the pregnancy test. And I still have to draw blood.”
Roz groaned, pressing her face against his shoulder. “I thought I’d got out of that.”
“No chance. I have to make sure mamma and baby are both healthy. I’m going to schedule a sonogram for next week, make sure everything’s okay. That all right with you?”
“Not now, Julian. I’m kinda overwhelmed.”
Fair enough. Julian was pretty floored himself. “Sorry. Just going on autopilot, you know. It’s the doctor part of me taking over. I can’t help it.”
“Well, help it.” Roz punched him in the shoulder. “Uncle Julian.”
Huh. He kind of liked the sound of that.
“HOW’S YOUR sister?”
Julian turned around, surprised to find Jack standing behind him in his kitchen. He put down the knife he’d been using to chop carrots. Being somewhat at a loss for cures for the side effects of the early stages of pregnancy, he was doing the only thing he could think of: making soup.
“She’s fine,” he smiled, standing on tiptoe for a moment to welcome Jack with a leisurely kiss. “Mmm. Hi. Yeah, she’s, well, there’s not anything actually wrong with her.”
The corner of Jack’s mouth quirked up in a half-grin. “You rushed home because she had a hangover?”
“Ah, no. Actually, she didn’t even finish her first drink.” Julian yelped as Jack squeezed his ass.
“No?” Jack released him, wandered over to the stove, and stuck his face over the soup pot. “Smells good. So what’s the problem?”
He scratched the back of his neck. “There isn’t one.”
Turning, Jack leaned against the countertop. “No problem, huh? She’s still sleeping, isn’t she? She hasn’t been back to work in a couple of days. I do go to the rec complex every day, you know. Hallie’s been asking after her.”
Fuck it. It wasn’t like Jack was going to tell anybody, and Julian could not keep any more secrets from him. The one he already had to bear was hard enough. He sighed, hooked his fingers through Jack’s belt loops, and pulled them close together, nestling between Jack’s wide-planted legs. “The thing is, Roz is pregnant.”
“No shit?” Jack returned the embrace, settling his hands on Julian’s hips. The gesture seemed so natural, and yet it made Julian’s heart skip a beat. “She happy about it? She’s pretty good with kids.”
“Actually, she’s ecstatic. Not that it was expected, or anything. We’re both still sort of in shock.”
Jack pulled him close, slanting his mouth down over Julian’s. Julian opened under the onslaught, welcoming Jack’s tongue into his mouth. He hummed happily as Jack worked his hands into his back pockets, and Julian wrapped his arms around Jack’s neck.
“Hi,” Jack mumbled around his tongue.
Julian grinned into the kiss, finally breaking away. Jack was so affectionate lately, it was getting harder and harder to remind himself that they weren’t even officially a couple. He thought Jack might be forgetting, too. “Hi, yourself.”
“Oh, spare me. I’m already nauseous.”
Jack turned his face toward the doorway over Julian’s head. “Hi, Roz. Feeling better?”
“I was,” Roz grumbled. Julian squirmed around, trying not to dislodge Jack’s hands, which were still settled comfortably on his hips. In the doorway, Roz was wearing mismatched pajamas, her blonde hair mostly falling out of its rough ponytail. “You guys are so sweet it turns my stomach. Not that it takes much right now,” she added pointedly with a glance at her brother. “I’m assuming you did tell him?”
Julian didn’t know whether to shrug, nod, or blush, so he settled for a mixture of the three. Jack added, “Congratulations.”
Roz acknowledged him with a wry smile. “Thanks. So. Did I smell food?”
Chuckling, Julian reluctantly disentangled himself from Jack’s arms. “You must be feeling better. The soup should be ready in about twenty minutes.”
“Good.” Padding barefoot over to the kettle, Roz flipped it on and grabbed a mug and tea bag from the cupboard. “This peppermint shit is absolutely disgusting, but it works.”
Julian leaned in to Jack conspiratorially. “One day, she will trust my physicianly knowledge without doubting me.”
“I’m just worried that she’s now got an excuse to be all mood-swingy,” Jack stage-whispered back.
“I can hear you,” Roz pointed out. Julian watched in amusement as she spooned a truly gluttonous amount of honey into her mug. “It’s just lucky for you that right now my mood is swinging toward hungry. And physicianly is not a word.”
Julian nudged Jack’s shoulder with his own. “You staying for a bowl of soup?”
He saw the panic flash briefly in Jack’s eyes. Family dinners were awfully domestic for him, Julian knew. But the expression was gone as soon as it had come. “I could eat,” he agreed after a second. “Count me in.”
Chapter Twelve
“DO YOU think this is too much?” Julian asked, picking out yet another stuffed animal and adding it to the cart. “I mean, am I taking doting uncle too far?”
Jack’s bemused expression said it all. Julian could barely see him over the mountain of stuff he’d piled into the cart. “I think you might be, yeah. I mean, how many stuffed polar bears can one kid need? Save something for your parents to get her.”
Sighing, Julian started putting the stuffed animals back. “It’s too early, anyway,” he sighed. It was December, and Roz was pushing three months pregnant, but as her doctor, he was hyperaware that she was far from out of danger
of losing the baby. It was hard to focus on, though, because he was so excited for her. He’d had a hard time not buying out the entire Toys “R” Us.
It had been Jack’s idea that they take a weekend to go Christmas shopping in Calgary, and Julian had been happy enough at the thought of spending the better part of two days alone with Jack, not bothering to pretend that they weren’t together at least in some sense, that he’d agreed without thinking. He was still trying to figure out if he could squeeze in a trip to see Jack’s mom without either betraying her confidence or making Jack suspicious. Maybe it was better if he left it alone; he didn’t want to seem like he was pushing too hard for something more than what they had.
What they did have was becoming more and more difficult to define every day. Their relationship wasn’t official, or even officially exclusive, though Julian was fairly certain neither of them had any interest in seeing anyone else. Most people in town seemed to assume that Jack was seeing Roz. Apparently word had gotten out about the flowers he’d brought her, though to Julian’s amusement, the story about what had happened to the flowers had yet to surface. Maybe that should have bothered him, but somehow he couldn’t bring himself to care much. He hadn’t been this happy in a long time, and he wasn’t going to wreck it the way he’d ruined his first—well, okay, second—relationship.
Shaking his head as if to clear it, Julian put the last stuffed animal—a polar bear puppet cute enough to melt even the coldest heart—back on the shelf and turned around to find Jack’s eyes on him. “What?” he said. “You’re looking at me funny. Do I have something on my face?”
“Not yet,” Jack said wickedly, advancing to back Julian up against the shelf of toys. It was nearly closing time, so the store was almost empty, at least for holiday shopping season. Julian’s startled yelp probably drew a few curious glances, but he wasn’t going to worry about it. Jack’s lips brushed his ear. “What do you say we forget the shopping and call it a night?”
Julian swallowed hard, shivering. “That sounds like a great idea to me. Let’s get out of here.”
AS IT turned out, Julian needn’t have worried about meeting Jack’s mom again. When they woke up in the morning, the weather forecast was calling for snow, and they had to hurry up and pack their purchases into the truck in order to be home before the worst of the storm hit. They had just pulled into the driveway when the flurries thinned out into the harsher, stinging snow of a blizzard. The wind picked up and the sky turned dark above them, though it was not quite two in the afternoon.
Grabbing the last of the packages out of the backseat, Julian looked up and whistled. “That got ugly fast.”
“Yeah,” Jack agreed, managing somehow to close the door with his butt. “I’m almost glad we skipped the morning sex.”
Julian snorted. More than likely he was regretting having skipped it; they could have been snowed in and stayed another night. That was okay, though. “Liar.”
Roz opened the door for them as they approached, her eyes widening at the sheer number of bags there were. “Good grief. Did you forget the kitchen sink?”
“They were sold out,” Julian said smartly. “Close your eyes; I know what you’re like around presents.”
Roz obediently covered her eyes, though he could see her fingers spreading so that she could look through them. With her arms up like that, he thought he could see her abdomen starting to swell with the baby. Maybe she was just getting fat.
“I think your secret’s out,” Jack said a fraction of a second later, setting down the armload of bags in the pantry. He motioned to her stomach. “You’re normally so in shape that people are going to notice that right away.”
Roz dropped her hands from her sides and patted her belly affectionately. She probably could have gotten away with wearing loose clothing for a while, except for the fact that she was still teaching three aquafitness classes a week. “That’s okay. I’m sort of looking forward to being able to tell people. Although it is always so awkward when people ask who the father is.”
“Aw, come on. Even I knew better than to ask you that.”
Roz smacked Jack halfheartedly, casting a put-upon expression Julian’s way. “Are you going to let him get away with that?”
Julian shrugged out of his coat and hung it up, accepting Jack’s scarf and hat without comment. “Considering that half of the town is probably going to think he’s the father, and the other half really is too smart to ask, I think he can get away with whatever he likes!”
“I bet that’s the truth.”
Jack just gave them both a smug look. “So! Who’s going to feed me?”
“Julian, if you don’t want food poisoning. The fetus made me eat all the leftovers.” Roz motioned at the clean, empty container sitting on the counter. “I was just putting away the dishes when Mom and Dad called.”
“I missed them?” Julian said, disappointed. Oh, well; he could call them back later, find out what they were up to. Right now, he apparently had hungry mouths to feed. Well, three hungry mouths and one umbilical cord. “Did they say when they’re flying up?”
“Sometime in the new year,” she told him as he rifled through the cupboards, checking out the dinner options. It was early, but he and Jack had skipped lunch, and his stomach was starting to let him know exactly how displeased it was that he had made such an egregious oversight. “Some friends of theirs invited them to spend Christmas with them. They were going to come here for Christmas, but Mom tried to book the tickets online in October, and you know how that usually goes.”
Julian did know. Their mother was not what you might call techno-literate. “You tell them yet?” he asked conversationally, pulling a bag of linguine noodles from a cupboard. Hmm, maybe a nice Alfredo sauce and some vegetables?
Roz hopped up onto the counter, swinging her legs against the lower cupboards; Jack, Julian noted in his peripheral vision, was already getting out the plates and cutlery. “Nah. I figure I’ll tell them when they’re down. It’s not like I’ll be able to keep it from them.”
“Mom’ll be so excited she’ll probably shit a Frisbee.” Julian rolled his eyes, filled the pasta pot with water, and set it on the stove.
“That would be something.”
The three of them busied themselves with preparing dinner, and it turned out that it was a good thing they’d started early. Almost the moment they were done cooking, the power flickered and went out, leaving them in a bluish darkness, listening to the howl of the wind. They ate their dinner in the living room by the light of the fireplace.
“Looks like I’m not going home tonight,” Jack commented, peering out the window. From what Julian could see, which wasn’t much, the blinding snow was coming down as hard as ever, and by now, the roads would be treacherous. It was only a five-minute drive to Jack’s place, but it certainly wasn’t worth the risk.
“Yeah, because that’s a major newsflash,” Roz teased. “I don’t know who the two of you think you’re fooling.”
Julian caught Jack’s eye for a brief instant before the other man looked away, and felt himself flush. He didn’t think anyone would notice in the near-darkness, anyway.
“I’m going to take a nap,” Roz announced, stretching. “Possibly until tomorrow morning. Have a good night, guys.”
After she’d gone to bed and the dinner dishes had been collected and deposited in the kitchen sink for consideration when there was hot running water, the two of them settled back into the living room. Tired, Julian leaned his head on Jack’s shoulder and tried to hold back a yawn. They watched the fire for a few minutes in silence, the hypnotic effects of the flames lulling Julian into a sort of trance.
Jack snapped him out of it by speaking softly. “You know, I’ve been thinking….”
Julian lifted his head, feeling the beginnings of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “Uh-oh.”
“Cute. As I was saying….” Julian turned to look him straight on, smile fading. He sounded a little nervous about this, unsure.
“Since your parents aren’t coming up for Christmas anymore, I thought maybe you would like to spend it with me and my mom in Calgary.”
Julian stared at him for a full minute.
“I mean, I understand if you don’t want to go, I just thought it might be nice if—”
Realizing Jack had mistaken his silence for a refusal, Julian darted forward and cut off his babbling with a fierce kiss. “Don’t be stupid. Of course I’d love to come.” He had to bite his tongue to keep from saying too much. It seemed that Jack was finally starting to treat what they had as a real relationship, and Julian wasn’t going to push it. “It’s just, I can’t leave Roz here by herself at Christmas. That wouldn’t be right.”
“So bring her along,” Jack suggested. “There’s plenty of room. And I’ve got to tell you, Mom is a fantastic cook.”
“Okay, yeah. I’ll ask Roz about it. But it sounds like a good idea to me.” Julian bit his lip. Well, he’d known it would come to this sooner or later. He was hoping Flo wouldn’t blow his cover and let on that they’d met before, or the fragile trust that existed between the two of them would be broken. Then again, keeping their acquaintance on the down-low had been her idea in the first place. “Um, does your mom know you’re seeing someone?”
Jack groaned as if this had just occurred to him, and Julian’s heart sank. “God, if she’s been talking to Bella at all, she’ll probably think I’m the one who knocked up Roz.” He put his hand around Julian’s knee and squeezed, making him jump. “I guess I’ll just have to tell her the truth. She’s going to have a bird when she realizes I’ve been seeing someone without telling her.”
Julian realized he was staring again, but he couldn’t help it. It couldn’t possibly be that easy. Could it?
“Her brother’s gay,” Jack added unnecessarily. “Freaking out should be minimal.”