‘Let’s just assume that he is and will stay alive,’ Gideon offered. We nodded. It was a starting point.
‘I have to go there.’ I stated.
‘Yes, that seems inevitable. But we need to understand why he wants the jungle to be the arena and what that means for us.’
’Not us, just me.’ I said.
They all looked at me.
‘You can’t go alone’ Gideon commented. ‘He won’t be alone. You can count on that.’
‘I know’ I answered. ‘But to be absolutely blunt, if I take anyone with me, they will be a liability.’ Blank faces all around. ‘You are too vulnerable to his powers, that way you will only hinder me. I don’t want to have to worry about your safety, or about him knowing any plans I might have.’ Slowly they nodded. It made sense. Aze could read their mind. Any information they had would be his as soon as we arrived at the scene. Besides—I work better alone. It was bad enough that I would worry about Panat. He’s a big distraction. Once again, I let myself get involved. Once again, it was biting me in the foot.
‘How can I get there?’ Time to make plans. I would worry about Panat later.
‘We can get you near. Within about sixty miles. There is a river, a tributary of the Amazon. We can get a small fast boat there. The remaining leg of the journey we have absolutely no idea what you will find. That part of the Amazon seems to be a black box. No one has documented it before. It’s virgin territory. There are no satellite images or anything like that. It’s an anomaly. Weird.’ Hans had researched the coordinates from the minute the stream had stopped. Even he was surprised with what he had found. Or to be more precise—what he had not found. The idea that there were still undiscovered places on this planet was completely foreign to him. He believed in science.
‘That’s far enough. I’ll go alone from there on.’
‘Are you sure?’ Joseph asked. I nodded. ‘I could accompany you. At least I would distract him for a while. Azazel and I go back a long way,’
‘Yes, and that’s exactly why I won’t take you. He knows you too well.’ I didn’t want Joseph with me. Some part of me—the Primal part I think—wanted nothing to do with him. There wasn’t anything specific I could put my finger on. It was just a feeling, something was still off.
‘I don’t want to be insulting, but you would not be able to keep up.’ I said.
‘You’ll change.’ He understood.
’Yes, it’s the fastest way to travel the remaining miles. And most adapted to the jungle. There’s no saying what I’ll find there. Or what will find me.’
Again, it made sense.
As the cat, I would more or less blend into the jungle. The animals would avoid. The chance that I would encounter any people was very small. And if anyone did happen to see me, they would be terrified. No questions would be asked. Anywhere.
‘Ok.’ Joseph finally said. ‘But we need to find a way to communicate.’
‘That will be impossible.’ I said. ‘It’s not like I’m taking any bags with me.’ I was adamant. ‘I will contact you as soon as I can.’
‘How will you get out of the jungle?’
‘Probably the same way I came in, preferably with Panat in tow.’
‘Shall we have the boat wait for you?’
‘Wait for two days, no more.’ I decided. ‘After that we will make our own way.’
‘But it’s in the middle of nowhere.’ Hans exclaimed.
‘It’s in the middle of my turf’ I answered. ‘I’ll find a way.’
‘Hans’ Joseph decided. ‘Please make the arrangement with as little a ripple as possible.’ He turned to the others. ’This is not general knowledge. Keep it under wraps as much as possible. What you have seen and heard here today stays here. You will not discuss this with anyone.’
He addressed me again. ‘Aze knows that you will be coming, but not exactly when. You will need that advantage. He is a resourceful person.’
‘So am I.’
‘I don’t doubt that.’
I left the room to prepare myself. And to go worry about Panat in my own way.
CHAPTER FIFTY-SIX
He called again in the dark hours of the night.
I looked at the phone, recognised Panat’s number, knew who was calling. I debated whether I would answer it or not. Both decisions had merit.
I should have let it ring, or even turned it off.
But I didn’t.
I picked up the phone and accepted the call.
‘Hi beautiful.’ The cheerful voice on the other side of the line was Azazel, as I expected. No surprises there.
‘So, you’ve seen the stream.’ It was a statement, not a question. He was so smug, my anger flared again.
‘What do you want from me?’ I said icily.
‘I thought that was obvious.’ He mimicked surprise. ‘I want you to come to me. It’s an invitation. Albeit a pushy one, I admit to that. But see it in a positive light. You will finally be able to meet me up close and personal. Me—someone like you. It will be a revelation. I can tell you so much.’ I searched my mind again for proof that he was trying to get in my head. I couldn’t find him. Either he had read my insecurity about myself in Panat’s mind, or he was guessing. I stayed silent anyway.
‘You want to come here. I know that, and so do you.’ He continued in a soft and slightly threatening voice. All the humour and charm gone. ‘Either because you want to hang my guts around my neck, or because you are curious about what I could enlighten you about. Either way the end result is the same. I tried to convince you in a nice way, but you hung up on me. Not nice. So now I have something you want. I have your precious Panat, your pet Watcher. Oh, he’s still alive. I won’t kill him until you get here. You have my word for that.’
‘And what is your word worth?’ I couldn’t stop myself. The Primal was taking over. All restraint thrown out of the window.
He laughed. ‘Regaining your spunk huh? I guess the effects of the bomb have worn off. You are resilient, that’s for sure. Sorry for the test, I was curious what you could endure.’
‘Your curiosity killed ten people.’
‘Don’t pretend to care.’ He answered with absolute contempt. What are ten people compared to the number that you have on your slate. Hundreds? Or thousands by now? Don’t be so hypocritical. You’re a killer, a murderer, like me. Don’t presume to place yourself above me. Look at yourself in the mirror will you, and get off your high horse. Their pathetic deaths served a purpose. I now have what it takes for you to come to me.’
His words burned into me. Each syllable biting into my feelings of self-worth, confirming all the doubts that I had. Branding me a murderer. It was my fault that these people would never go home again. They had died because of me. But he was right, they were just a drop in the river of blood on my slate. His words were, at the same time, strengthening the power of the Primal side. It was pulling me apart, but still I listened.
‘I’m looking forward to seeing you up close.’ The charm was back in his voice. ‘I know that you are curious, and that you have thought about what we spoke of yesterday. We would be great together. We would rule the world. You would finally have a mate that you are worthy of. And so would I. I have longed for you for centuries. You would complete me. As I would you. I can give you the answers and we can make up our own future. Not the one that the Watchers and supposedly Nature has determined for us. We are the architects of our lives, and of the future of this world as a whole. I say—Fuck the Watchers. Who the hell do they think they are anyway? And don’t pretend to have any loyalty towards them. You’re too clever for that. They don’t deserve it. They will shackle you if you let them. They tried to with me, it didn’t work and now they want to do away with me. They set you, a God, up against me. Who the fuck are they to determine the actions of the Gods? Humans are ants. To be crushed under our feet.’
He was speaking directly to Primal now.
And she was listening…
‘Get here.’ With
that he hung up.
I sat in the dark. Staring at the wall. Digesting all that he had said,
CHAPTER FIFTY-SEVEN
‘Don’t tell me that you’ve fallen for that fucking bitch too?’ Sarah was livid. Throwing all caution into the wind, her comment was directed at Azazel.
He looked up from the phone he still held in his hand. Flinging his mind out to invade Sarah’s, he attacked her from inside her head. She fell to the ground from the battering his mind gave her. He continued until she screamed out her apology and pleaded with him to stop. No one, absolutely no one, raised their voice to him, no one talked to him like that.
‘Sarah, Sarah. What shall I do with you?’ He loved to patronise his acolytes. And they just lapped it up.
She was still rocking on the floor, holding her head in her hands. When he invaded someone’s mind like he had just done with Sarah, they experienced excruciating bolts of pain that shot through their brain and ricocheted off the inside of their skull. It felt as if something was alive and on the rampage inside their head. Rational thought was impossible. Most lost control of all bodily functions. The pain was that intense. The end result was an enormous depressive feeling, akin to coming down after a Shiva high. Light and sound hurt for days, and any movement resulted in unbearable suffering. It was a once-only thing. Nobody wanted this again.
It was the first time that Sarah had experienced Aze’s wrath. She had seen others suffer, but had managed to steer clear of the experience herself. Most of the time she was extremely sensitive to Aze’s moods. That was a necessity if you wanted to be around him for a longer period of time. He was known for his temperament shifts. Except for the older woman, no one stayed around him for very long. Most died, and not of natural causes. Once Sarah had even witnessed the end of one such fallen acolyte. His mind was fried by Azazel, resulting in the victim ending his misery by driving a fire poker through his eye into his tormented brain.
Now she knew what had driven the man to his desperate act. The pain was excruciating.
Azazel walked over to her and gently, but firmly, picked her off the floor and on to her feet. ‘What am I going to do with you, you silly girl. You must learn to rein in your emotions. As you see, they will get you in trouble.’ He slowly walked her to the sofa where he pushed her on to the seat. She sat down gratefully.
‘All this because of love scorned’ Aze continued as he walked back to his seat. He observed her from there. ‘You women will never cease to amaze me. What you will risk in the name of love, or lust maybe. All because Panat loves her instead of you. I am very disappointed in you Sarah. I had hoped that you were more in control of yourself. Now you suffer the consequences.’
Aze waved his hand to Rafe, who stood to the side of the room watching the proceedings. ‘Take her away.’ Aze ordered.
While they left the room, Aze contemplated why he had reacted to her quite minor outburst as extremely as he had. Yes, she had been disrespectful, but not to such a degree that merited the reaction he had delivered. Her anger wasn’t even aimed at him. It was aimed at Anadi.
Maybe that was the reason why he had overreacted. Anadi really was getting under his skin. Sarah might be right. He was falling for her. Or was it just the idea? That he could find someone to actually stay with for eternity. Someone like him. Someone in the same league as him. Someone worthy of him and his love.
Maybe he was in love with the idea.
In the twenty-six centuries that he had been on the planet, he had acquired his share of women. Some of whom he had truly loved. Others that were mere pastimes. But always their relationship had ended badly. Either with their ageing or their disappearance. He remembered one specific woman—Parinaze. A beautiful and loving being who had a good influence on him for decades. He had been mellow then. Enjoyed life and beauty and love. But her life span had been restricted, whereas his wasn’t. She aged, he stayed the same. Out of love, he stayed with her till the end when she ultimately died of old age. But the last years left him bitter. Yearning for how she had been. How they had been together. No other relationship had come even close to that one. All had left an empty place in his heart and soul.
Imagine that he would be able to replicate that feeling, though now for eternity. He would not have to say goodbye anymore. Never. He would finally be complete.
Forever.
CHAPTER FIFTY-EIGHT
Hans was quick. He got all the travelling arrangements organised before ten o’clock the next morning.
Two hours later, Anadi was on a plane headed for Brazil. She arrived at Brasilia airport by noon the next day.
From there she took a flight to Eduardo Gomes airport in the jungle. A clansman met her there and they travelled from the airport passing the city of Manaus to the Amazon River past the connection with the Rio Negra. There, Anadi said goodbye to the Watcher and boarded a speedboat that took her up the mother river and subsequently down the Purus tributary.
The skipper was a sullen man who refrained from speaking. He stood at the wheel and deftly manoeuvred the fast vessel over the choppy waters. They passed rubber plantations on both sides of the river that effectively functioned as the border between Brazil and Peru. The scenery on both sides was the same—deforestation and devastation. The farther they went up the river, the more the dense forest reclaimed the scenery. The only settlements that she saw now were those of the indigenous people. They eyed the boat with understandable suspicion.
Hours later the skipper turned the boat towards the bank of the river. He indicated that this was as far as he would go. Anadi thanked him and jumped over the side, wading the last two meters to the sandy rivers edge.
As she disappeared into the foliage she heard the boat back out, turn and speed away. There was no going back. But she didn’t want to. She was here on a mission. Get Panat out and stop Azazel. There would be no compromise.
Discarding her clothes, she changed and, enjoying the texture of the leaves and mud under her paws, bounded into the jungle.
Anadi followed her intuition and the general directions that Hans had given her and made good time.
She decided to squander a few hours to kill and eat a tapir. She would need the extra energy. It was an investment. Necessary.
By the early morning of the next day, she was in the general vicinity of the coordinates that Azazel had given them. It was impossible to tell, but she felt that she was near. She slowed her progress and listened to the sounds of the jungle. There was nothing out of the ordinary. She would need to find a higher vantage point. Somewhere she could at least see a bit more of the scenery, somewhere above the dense canopy. She found a small fast flowing river and followed it to a gorge. There she climbed the cliff side before it got steep and made her way through the jungle to the highest point. The foliage was still so dense that she couldn’t see very far, but it was better than earlier. She searched the jungle. Looking for anything that stood out. Anything that shouldn’t be here. She took her time. It would be a detail.
Sure enough, to her right, at a distance of about two kilometres, she saw that something had upset the birds. The parrots flew up into the air, their multi-coloured plumage stark against the bright greens of the treetops. Their flight was accompanied by an angry chattering. They had been disturbed and were none the happier for it.
There was no guarantee that this would be where she needed to go, but it warranted investigation. Leaving her perch, she made her way through the dense undergrowth in the direction of where the parrots had come from.
She took her time. Making sure that she was undetectable. Others would be alert. Waiting for the same tell-tale signs that she was here. She reminded herself that they were waiting for her. Azazel knew that she was coming.
CHAPTER FIFTY-NINE
I knew I was close.
I could feel it. The same strange tension that I felt when I watched the streams of Azazel, and when I saw him across the ally in Canterbury, was back again—only magnified. And there was another feeling. One
I couldn’t place.
As I lay on the leaves in the dense jungle I tried to pinpoint what I was experiencing. What was actually happening to me? One thing I knew for sure, I needed to find some way to keep control. I was scared stiff of what I could and maybe would inflict on everyone near if I let go. What if I went on a rampage and killed everyone, including Panat? History would repeat itself. The tension and pull was enormous. I could feel the Primal Nature pushing my sanity to the side. Not in the same way as decades ago when I tried to ignore the urges. It was different. It was like it was natural. Like it was what I had been searching for all this time. But that was impossible.
Wasn’t it?
Falling back on my meditation techniques, I slowed my breathing, focussing on my heartbeat. Slowly, very slowly I felt myself relax and I gained control once again. Thank God that Panat had taught me how to meditate.
With my new-found resolve, I stood up and padded off into the jungle making sure that I didn’t make a sound. It would not do to scare the birds or animals. That would be a sure sign to Azazel that I was near. I had to wonder if he could feel my presence like I did his. To be on the safe side, I would have to work on the assumption that he did. .
CHAPTER SIXTY
An hour later, I felt more than saw that the scenery was changing. The sounds were different too. It was a lot quieter. Not so many loud-mouthed parrots or other birds. Even the monkeys were silent. The whole atmosphere was off. Not that it was bad, just different.
The Beast Inside Page 21