by Diana Palmer
“Mrs. Ringgold asks about you all the time,” Dave added, trying to cheer her up. “She said she hopes you’ll come and teach at our school in the fall, if there’s an opening. So do I. I miss having you to talk to.”
She remembered his hopeless love and smiled with fellow feeling. “Maybe I’ll do just that,” she said.
The bag boy came to sack his groceries, another customer pushed a cart up behind him, and the brief conversation was over. He left with a promise to call her and she went back to work, trying to put what she’d learned out of her mind. She wished Mack would call, at least, to give her a chance to explain the misunderstanding. But he didn’t. And after Vivian’s fierce hostility, she was nervous about phoning the house at all. She hoped that things would work themselves out, if she was patient.
* * *
Late afternoon on the Thursday before baccalaureate exercises Friday night, she walked out of the bank after depositing her paycheck and ran right into Mack Killain.
It was the first time she’d seen him since the day she’d had the falling out with Vivian. He moved away from her, and the look he gave her was so contemptuous, so full of distaste, that she felt dirty. That was when she realized that Vivian must have told Mack what she thought Natalie and Whit had done. It was painfully obvious that Mack wasn’t going to listen to an excuse. She’d never imagined that he would look at her like that. The pain went all the way to her soul.
“How could you do that to Vivian, to your best friend?” he asked coldly.
“Do...what?” she faltered.
“You know what!” he thundered. “You two-timing, lying, cheating little flirt. He must be crazy. No man in his right mind would look twice at you.”
Her mouth fell open. Her heart raced. Her mouth was dry as cotton. “Mack...”
“You had us all fooled,” he continued, raising his voice and not minding who heard. Several people did. “Vivian trusted you! And while she was in bed with pneumonia, you were making out with the man she loved!”
Natalie wanted to go through the sidewalk. Her eyes brimmed over with tears. “I didn’t!” she tried to defend herself, almost choking on the words.
“There’s no use denying it. Vivian saw you,” he said with magnificent contempt. “She told me.”
It was a lie, but he believed it. Maybe he wanted to believe it. He’d said that they had no future together, and this would make the perfect excuse for him to push her out of his life. Nothing she said was going to make any difference. He simply did not want her, and he was making it clear.
She’d thought the pain was bad before. Now it was unbearable.
“All of us trusted you, made you part of our family. And this is how you repaid us, by betraying Vivian, who never did anything to hurt you.” His tone was vicious, furious. “Not only that, Natalie, you didn’t even try to apologize for it.”
She lifted her face defiantly. “I have nothing to apologize for,” she said in a husky, hoarse tone.
“Then we have nothing to say to each other, ever again,” he replied harshly.
“Mack, if you’d just let me try to explain,” she said, hoping for a miracle. “Calm down and talk to me.”
“I am calm,” he said in an icy tone. “What did you expect, anyway? A proposal of marriage?” He laughed bitterly. “You know where I stand on that issue. And even if I were in the mood for it, it wouldn’t be with a woman who’d sell me out the minute the ring was on her finger. You went to him afterward,” he gritted, “and you as much as told me you were going to. But if you think I’m jealous, honey, you’re dead wrong. You were Vivian’s friend, but I never wanted you hanging around my house. I tolerated you for Vivian’s sake.”
“I see.” Her face was white and she was aware of pitying, embarrassed looks around her, because he was eloquent.
He hardened his heart, bristling with wounded pride as he looked at her, furious at his own weakness. Well, never again. “Which reminds me, Natalie,” he added coldly, “I suppose it goes without saying that you’re not welcome at the ranch anymore.”
She lifted her eyes to his hard face and nodded slowly. “Yes, Mack,” she said in a subdued tone. “It does go without saying.”
Her heart was breaking. She turned away from that accusing, contemptuous gaze and walked briskly down the street to get away from him. She didn’t know how she was going to bear this latest outrage of Vivian’s. It had cost her Mack, whom she loved more than her own life. And he hated her. He hated her!
The bystanders were still staring at Mack when she was out of sight, but he didn’t say a word. He stalked into the bank, noticing that people almost fell over trying to get out of his way. He was furious. After going right out of his arms into Whit’s, she’d had the gall to try and deny it, even when Vivian had seen her with Whit! He would never trust his instincts about women again, he decided. If he could be fooled that easily, for that long, he was safer going around with Glenna. She might not be virtuous, but at least she was loyal—in her fashion.
Natalie went home with her heart around her knees. She made supper but couldn’t eat it. She’d assumed that Mack was making assumptions. It hadn’t occurred to her that Vivian would tell such a lie, or that Mack would believe it. But she’d helped things along by making those remarks to Mack in frustration when he’d put her out of the office after their tempestuous interlude. She hadn’t wanted Whit, ever. But nobody would believe that now. She’d lost not only Mack, but the only family she’d known for years. She went to bed and lay awake most of the night, wretched and alone.
She wondered how she could go on living in the same town with the Killains and see Mack and Vivian and the boys week after week. Did Bob and Charles hate her, too? Was it a wholesale contempt? Vivian had lied. That a woman she’d considered her best friend could treat her so callously hurt tremendously. Perhaps she was doomed to a life without affection. God knew that her aunt, old Mrs. Barnes, had only brought her from the orphanage to be a housekeeper and part-time nurse until the old lady died. No one had ever loved her. She’d wanted Mack to. She’d even thought at odd moments that he did, somehow. But the hatred in his eyes was damning. If he’d loved her, he’d have at least given her the benefit of the doubt.
But he hadn’t. He’d believed Vivian without hesitation. So all her dreams of love eternal had gone up in smoke. There was nothing left except to make a decision about what she was going to do with the rest of her life. She knew immediately that she couldn’t stay in Medicine Ridge. She would have to leave. Next week, after graduation, she was going to talk to one of her instructors who’d told her she knew of a job opening in a Dallas school where a relative was principal. Dallas sounded like a nice place to live.
* * *
Natalie marched in with her class to the baccalaureate service, trying not to notice how many of her classmates’ whole families had come to see them in their caps and gowns. It was a brief service, held in the college chapel with a guest speaker who was some sort of well-known political figure. Natalie barely heard what went on around her because she was so heartbroken.
When the service was over, she greeted classmates she knew and drove herself home. The next morning, she got up early to go to the college with her gown for the graduation exercises. She felt very proud of her accomplishment as she marched into the chapel along with her class and waited for her name to be called, for her diploma to be handed out. It would have been one of the best days of her life, if the Killains hadn’t been angry with her. As it was, she went through the motions like a zombie, smiling, looking happy for the cameras. But inside, she was so miserable that she only wanted to be alone. The minute the service was over, she went to look for the teacher who’d offered to help her get the Dallas job. And she told her she was interested.
* * *
The Killains were somber at the dinner table on Sunday. It was the first time in days they’d all been together, with the boy
s home, as well. It was more like a wake than a meal.
“Natalie graduated yesterday,” Bob said coolly, glaring at Mack and Vivian, who wouldn’t look at him. “My friend Gig’s sister was in her class. She said that Natalie didn’t have one single person of her own in the crowd for baccalaureate or graduation. Viv?”
Vivian had burst into tears. She pushed away from the table and went upstairs as fast as her healing lungs would allow.
Mack threw down his napkin, leaving his supper untouched, and stalked out of the room, as grim as death itself.
Bob looked at his brother and grimaced. “I guess I should have kept my mouth shut.”
“I don’t see why,” Charles replied irritably. “Natalie belongs to us, to all of us. But the two of them behave as if she’s at the top of the FBI’s most-wanted list. It’s that damned Whit, you mark my words. He did something or said something that caused this. He’s going around with old Murcheson’s daughter now, and she’s grubstaking his gambling habit. Everybody knows it. He even said that our sister was only a means to an end, so if Natalie was the cause of that breakup, good for her! She saved Viv from something a lot worse than pneumonia. Not that anybody but us cares, I guess,” he muttered as he attacked his steak.
In the hall, Mack overheard and scowled. He’d thought Whit had left Vivian for Natalie, so why was he going around with the Murcheson girl? First Natalie’s impassioned denial, now Viv’s hysterical retreat. Something was wrong here.
He followed Vivian upstairs to her room. She was sitting in the chair by her bed, tears rolling down her pale cheeks. He sank down on the bed facing her.
“Why don’t you tell me why you’re crying, Viv,” he invited gently.
She wiped at her red eyes with a tissue to catch the tears. “I lied,” she whispered.
His whole body stiffened. “I beg your pardon?”
“I mean, Natalie was pretty disheveled and Whit’s hair was ruffled. They looked like they’d been making out,” she said defensively. “I didn’t actually see them, though. But there was nobody else in the house except the two of them and they were down there for almost an hour.” Her face hardened as she said it, so she missed the sudden pallor of her brother’s face.
“I was down there,” he snapped. “Whit went out to get cigarettes. He’d just come back and made coffee when he and Natalie went up to your room.”
She gaped at him. Her jaw fell. Horror claimed her face. “Oh, no,” she whispered. “Oh, dear God, no!”
“She did nothing. With Whit,” he added, averting his gaze to the window. He looked, at that moment, as if he’d never smiled in his life. He was hearing himself accuse Natalie on the street in front of half a dozen bystanders of being a faithless tease.
Now it made sense. Mack had gotten drunk because he thought Natalie had gone straight from his arms to Whit’s. Vivian had told him so, believing that Natalie and Whit had been alone for that hour. Whit had admitted it. And all the time...
“I’ll go to her,” Vivian said at once. “I’ll apologize, on my knees if I have to!”
“Don’t bother,” he said, getting to his feet. “She won’t let you past the porch. I told her she wasn’t welcome here ever again.” His fists clenched at his hips. “And several other things that were...overheard,” he added through his teeth. “She went to her graduation all alone.” He had to stop because he was too choked to say another word. He went out without looking at Vivian, and the door closed with a jerk behind him.
Vivian put her face in her hands and bawled. Out of her own selfishness, she’d destroyed two lives. Mack loved Natalie. And she knew—she knew—that Natalie loved Mack, had always loved him! It wasn’t Natalie who’d betrayed them. It was Vivian herself. Her pride had been hurt because Whit preferred Natalie, but she’d been done a huge favor. She was besotted enough with the man to have given him all the money he’d asked for. She’d had a narrow escape, for which she had Natalie to thank. But they weren’t friends anymore. They’d pushed Natalie out of their lives. It was wishful thinking to suppose she’d forgive them or ever give them a chance to hurt her again. She’d never really been loved, unless it was by the parents who’d been so tragically killed in her childhood. She was alone in the world, and she must feel it now more than ever before. Vivian took a deep breath and dried her eyes. Surely there was some way, something she could do, to make amends. She had to.
* * *
Mack went off on a prolonged business trip the next day. He barely spoke to Vivian on his way out, and he looked like death warmed over. She could only imagine how he felt, after the way he’d behaved. Natalie might forgive him one day, but she’d probably never be able to forget.
It took her two days to get up enough courage to drive over to Natalie’s house and knock on the door. She got a real shock when the door was opened, because there were two suitcases sitting on the floor, and Natalie was dressed for travel.
“Natalie, could I speak to you for a minute?” Vivian asked hesitantly.
“A minute is all I have,” came the cool, distant reply. “I thought you were my cab. I have to get to the airport. One of my college professors is letting me fly with her to Dallas.”
“What’s in Dallas?” Vivian asked, shocked.
“My new job.” Natalie looked past her at a cab that was just pulling into the driveway. She checked to make sure she had her purse and all the documents she needed before she lifted her suitcases and put them on the porch. She locked the door while Vivian stood nearby, speechless.
“I’ve put the house on the market,” she continued. “I won’t be coming back.”
“Oh, Nat,” Vivian whispered miserably. “I lied. I lied to Mack. I thought... You were downstairs and so was Whit, for an hour or more. Whit didn’t deny what I accused him of doing with you. But I didn’t know Mack had come home.”
Natalie looked straight at her. In that instant she looked as formidable as Vivian’s taciturn brother. “Mack believed you,” she said. That was all. But it was more than a statement of fact. It meant that he didn’t even suspect that Natalie might be innocent. She was tarred and feathered and put on a rail without qualm.
“I’m his sister. I’ve never lied to him before,” she added. “Nat, I have to tell you something. You have to listen!”
“Are you the lady who wants to go to the airport?” the cabdriver asked.
“Yes, I am,” Natalie said, carrying her bags down the steps without another word to Vivian.
“Don’t go!” Vivian cried. “Please don’t go!”
“There’s nothing left in Medicine Ridge for me, and we both know it, Vivian,” she told the other woman without meeting her eyes as the cabdriver put both her bags in the trunk and then went to open the back door for Natalie to get into the cab. “You’ve finally got what you wanted. Aren’t you happy? I’ll never be even an imagined potential rival for any of your boyfriends again.”
“I didn’t know,” Vivian moaned. “I jumped to conclusions and hurt everybody. But please, Natalie, at least let me apologize! And don’t blame Mack for it. It’s not his fault.”
“Mack doesn’t want me,” Natalie said heavily. “I suppose I knew it from the beginning, but he made it very clear the last time I saw him. He’ll date Glenna and be very happy. Maybe you will, too. But I’m tired of being the scapegoat. I’m going to find a new life for myself in Dallas. Goodbye, Vivian,” she said tersely, still without looking in Vivian’s direction.
Vivian had never felt so terrible in all her life. She stood on the steps, alone, and watched the best friend she’d ever had leave town because of her.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered to the retreating cab. “Oh, Natalie, I’m so very sorry!”
* * *
She had to tell Mack that Natalie had gone, of course. That was almost as hard as watching Natalie leave. She found him in his study, at the computer, making decisions about resto
cking. He looked up when he saw her at the door.
“Well?” he asked.
She went into the room and closed the door behind her. She looked washed out, miserable, defeated.
“I went to apologize to Natalie,” she began.
His face tautened, and he looked a little paler. But he gathered himself together quickly and only lifted an eyebrow as he dropped his gaze to the computer screen. “I gather that it didn’t go well?”
She fingered her wristwatch nervously. This was harder than she’d dreamed. “I was just in time to see her leave.”
He frowned as he lifted his head. “Leave?”
She nodded. She sat in the chair beside the desk, where she’d sat and watched him the night he got drunk. She hated telling him what happened. He’d had so much responsibility in his life, so much pain. He’d never really had anyone to love, either, except for his siblings. He’d loved Natalie. Vivian had cost him the only woman who could have made him happy.
“Leave for where?” he demanded shortly.
She swallowed. “Dallas.”
“Dallas, Texas? Who the hell does she know in Texas?” he persisted, still not understanding what Vivian was saying.
“She’s got a job there,” she said reluctantly. “She’s...selling her house. She said she wouldn’t be coming back.”
For a few seconds, Mack didn’t speak. He stared at his sister as though he hadn’t understood her. Then, all at once, the life seemed to drain out of him. He stared at the dark paneling of the wall blindly while the truth hit him squarely in the gut. Natalie had left town. They’d hurt her so badly that she couldn’t even stay in the same community. Probably the gossip had been hard on her, too, because Mack had made harsh accusations in front of everyone. And how did you stop gossip, when it was never spoken in public?