by T. S. Harvey
I had a great night. It was just what I needed after what was probably the weirdest week of my life. Aunt Suze was fun. She looked sensational for an older woman; she wore great clothes and heads inevitably turned wherever she went.
‘We gotta do this again, Sares,’ she said, as she sat on the couch at home and removed her 5 inch heels.
‘Absolutely, it was great,’ I smiled.
I was shattered though. The headache I had earlier in the day was still with me, albeit a little less severe. On the bright side, though, I hadn’t once thought about the situation at school; until now, of course.
The rest of the weekend was pretty uneventful, which was what I needed really. I’d decided I was gonna stay as far away from Kacey and the girls as possible so was pretty pleased when she was nowhere in sight on Monday. In fact, she wasn’t in for the rest of the week. None of the girls seemed to know why she wasn’t in; none of those who would actually talk to me, that is. I didn’t really know why I bothered asking after her, perhaps it was the way I was raised to actually care about people. Talking about caring, I also tried all week to get chance to apologize to Erik but I never found the right moment. I wanted to say sorry but I didn’t want to do it with an audience. I caught him looking in my direction a couple of times but each time I thought I’d got his attention he’d turn away. Had he guessed it was me that had taken the photograph, had someone told him it was me? I didn’t know and the not knowing was really frustrating.
By Friday, I’d sort of put all the previous week’s aggravation to the back of my mind and decided to do something that some might think was a little odd. I decided to go see how Kacey was. Britney, the foul-mouthed member of the pack had actually been fairly polite when I spoke to her; she even gave me Kacey’s address.
Saturday morning I didn’t get up until about 10 a.m. I was a bit annoyed about that but it was the first lie-in I’d had in weeks. I was your typical teenager in most respects but I guess the fairly regimented routine that I’d had with my dad meant I didn’t laze around too much. After I’d showered and had some breakfast I did the chores Aunt Suze had asked me to do before setting off to Kacey’s.
I got to Lincoln Avenue around 12.30 p.m. It wasn’t exactly what I expected. I didn’t know the town well, so when Britney gave me her address I didn’t realise it was in such an upmarket area. From the outside I’d say it probably had six maybe seven bedrooms. It was mostly a white brick property built in a very European style. I’d travelled throughout Europe with my dad so had had exposure to a lot of different architectural influences; this was definitely very Italian-looking. It had a large terrace style balcony that ran the length of the front of the house with off white pillars set at intervals. There was decorative wrought-iron railing around the perimeter of the property with large ornate gates leading onto the driveway. As I approached the house I could see there was an intercom system next to the gate on the left. As the gates were closed I pressed the button on the system and waited for a response. A few moments later a woman’s voice answered.
‘Yes?’
‘Hi there,’ I said somewhat cautiously, ‘Is Kacey home?’
‘One minute.’
I stood there for a few moments before a buzzer sounded and the small gate to the left of the main gates clicked open.
I walked tentatively to the front door. I was starting to think this wasn’t a good idea. What was I gonna say? ‘Hey there, I know I called you a bitch the other week but how are you feeling?’
I really did think perhaps I hadn’t thought this through properly. However, any thoughts I had of turning around were soon dismissed, as the front door opened and Kacey came out to meet me. Dressed in low-cut trousers and short crop top, hair draped down around her shoulders, and wearing sunglasses, she certainly didn’t look ill.
‘You come to have another pop at me?’ she snapped before I’d even said hello. ’Cos if you are, you can just turn around and piss off!’
This riled me somewhat but I figured, as I’d made the effort to get here, I might as well see it through.
‘No. Actually I came to see if you were OK. No one seemed to know why you were off so I thought I’d just come and see if you were all right.’
This seemed to surprise Kacey. I remember thinking that being surprised someone cared enough to come, and ask how you were, was really quite sad.
‘You’d better come in then,’ she said more breezily.
As we walked through the main reception and out to the patio at the back of the property, I felt more uncomfortable about being in someone else’s house than I ever had before. This level of opulence wasn’t something I was used to. It was hard to understand why she was at Carterbrook High and not at some private school up state. I guess there must have been a reason but I figured now wasn’t really the time to ask.
We’d been sat out the back making small talk for a few minutes when a woman, clearly the maid, bought some soft drinks out to us.
‘So did I miss anything? Did the geek squad manage to hack my account and delete the photo of Erik?’ she laughed.
I shook my head in disbelief.
‘Why do you turn from being someone who is actually quite nice into a complete bitch? I wanted to give us a second chance to be friends but I really don’t want, or need, to be friends with someone who runs so hot and cold.’
I stood up from the chair and picked my purse up off the floor.
‘Don’t go. Please.’
Kacey reached out her hand to me and took hold of my arm. ‘I know I can be, well, a bit spiteful. I don’t mean to be, honestly I don’t. It’s just that, well, I’m miserable and sometimes it’s easier to handle when I make someone else miserable. I know it’s wrong, I’m sorry.’
As I turned around to look at her, she removed the sunglasses she’d been wearing since before I arrived. What I saw took me aback.
‘What happened?’ my tone was calmer, more concerned.
‘My stepmother. She likes a drink, especially when Dad’s away. Oh, don’t worry, I didn’t just lie down and take it. She’s wearing Ray-Bans too! I couldn’t go into school looking like this, though. Children’s Services would be informed, all hell would break loose. Dad won’t throw her out, it’d cost him too much. I’m just hanging in there till I go to college, till I get away from here.’
I sat down and listened intently to her pouring her heart out. I got the impression she had never done this with anyone before. I wasn’t quite sure why she did so with me but I think she really needed to do it with someone. After she’d finished I chose my words carefully. She’d gotten quite choked up and had forced the tears not to fall, she looked really quite vulnerable.
‘OK. I get it. I do. But that doesn’t excuse it. For some unfathomable reason, I really do think we could be friends. I’m not gonna be one of the others, though. I’m not gonna nod, smile, and agree with everything you say. If you can accept that and promise to try not to be such a cow then I’d like to wipe the slate clean and start again.’
‘I’d like that too. And I will try, but I’ve got almost seventeen years of cow behind me.’
She grinned, just like she had that first day.
I couldn’t help but smile. ‘OK. That’s good enough. For now.’
We spent the rest of the afternoon talking about anything and everything. Anything and everything except Erik and that photo!
It was after 4 p.m. before I left for home. Kacey wouldn’t be back at school the following week unless the bruising hadn’t gone down enough. I agreed I’d take copies of my notes for the classes we both did and see whether I could get one of the other girls to take them in the classes we didn’t. It had been a good day. I left feeling really good about things. Perhaps Carterbrook High might not be so bad after all.
Chapter Seven – Mirror, Signal, Manoeuvre
Sarah
When Monday morning came around I felt much more positive about the week ahead and I decided I would go in a bit earlier in the hopes of finding
Erik before school started; the sooner I got this damned apology out of the way the better. I arrived at the parking lot, got off my scooter, took my books from the saddle bag on the back, and headed up towards the entrance. There was a low brick wall either side of the main doors and I sat down facing the oncoming hordes. I had a good view, I was confident I would see him arrive. By 8.30am the place was bustling and as suspected Kacey was nowhere to be seen; the other girls were stood some way over by the wall, flirting madly with the jocks. The geeks were sat on one of the benches just a few yards from where I was but no sign of Erik. It was only ten minutes to the bell. I had just about given up seeing him when I spotted him walking, head down, towards the geeks. I knew if I was quick enough I could intercept him. I grabbed my books off the wall and strode out quickly in his direction. For a moment I thought it looked like he was purposefully avoiding me.
‘Erik!’ I shouted as light and breezy as I could muster. He didn’t look up. I wasn’t that far from him; I couldn’t believe he hadn’t heard me. He changed direction slightly to walk across the grass. I did the same.
‘Hey there,’ I said grabbing him by the arm. ‘Didn’t you hear me?’
‘Of course I did. I just chose to ignore you. Clearly you are too stupid to realise it.’
I could hear the geeks laughing almost triumphantly in the background; they must have heard his response. In fact, I doubt there were many within throwing distance that didn’t.
‘Yeah, I guess I kind of had that coming.’
I tried to sound apologetic but not pathetic but he didn’t respond. He just brushed past me and went over to the others.
‘Morning, guys,’ he said brightly. ‘Good weekend?’
I felt totally deflated. I wanted to apologize, I wanted him to see I wasn’t a complete bitch and I wanted to kick the shit out of him for not letting me. I stood there for a moment watching him laughing and joking with his friends. I hadn’t noticed his smile before, it was really broad. He had fabulous teeth; his lips were a lovely warm reddish colour and really quite thick. His smile wasn’t the only thing that was broad. Underneath the somewhat oversized, baggy sweater were definite signs of shoulders, it was hard to be sure of course but I couldn't help but wonder what he’d look like in a nice tight T. I didn’t realise I’d been stood in the same spot looking at him for quite so long.
‘You’re still here. And you’re staring!’ he snapped.
‘Yeah, well I figured if I waited here long enough you might learn some manners!’ I spat back.
‘Ha,’ he laughed mockingly. ‘Talk about pot and kettle. I seem to remember trying to be nice to you the other week but got a mouthful of abuse for my efforts.’
I felt really bad. He was right; I had been a bit of a cow.
‘I’m sorry. I just wanted to apologize for the photo that was put on Facebook. It was me that took it.’
He looked almost sympathetic; I don’t think he was expecting a confession.
‘OK. So why did you do it?’
‘Because I’m an idiot. I took a dare from the girls, trying to fit in, new girl and all that.’
Now I felt embarrassed. I might as well have written ‘shallow bitch’ across my forehead. I felt like the whole school could hear me.
‘Yeah, well, erm, just forget it. It’s no big deal,’ and with that he just turned and walked off.
Well, all things considered, that didn’t go too badly. Moments later the bell sounded. The rest of the day was pretty uneventful and only Britney spoke to me.
‘Did you go see Kacey?’
‘Yeah. She’s just a bit off colour. Should be back soon.’
‘Yeah, I bet she is. A bit black and blue-ish no doubt, that’s the usual ‘off colour’ for her.’
I wanted to contradict her but it was clear she knew the truth, and it was also clear she was genuinely concerned. This was a bit of a surprise; I didn’t really think any of the girls were actually true friends. They had always seemed so superficial and phoney. Britney was always the loudest, most foul mouthed of the girls; perhaps that wasn’t the real Britney.
‘I’ll call her tonight. See if she’s OK,’ she said, as we headed out of school.
‘Say hello for me.’
‘I will,’ she said, as she walked off toward the bus stop.
As I rode out of the parking lot toward the main road I spotted Erik boarding the bus. I stopped for just a moment remembering back to my attempts at getting his photograph and the state my clothes were in when I’d gotten home. No matter how hard I tried to push it to the back of my mind it still bugged me. I had wondered whether I’d had some kind of epileptic fit, it was possible if I’d had a fit that that was how they got in that state, it would also account for what I’d thought were missing hours.
Before I knew it I started to wonder what it would be like to get to know him better. He had been really reasonable after I’d apologized; I couldn’t say with all certainty that I’d have been as nice if the tables were turned. As the bus pulled away, I could see him stood up towards the back of the bus, smiling and laughing with a girl who was in my year. It was stupid really; how could I feel pangs of jealousy when I didn’t even know him? I tried to shake it off and set off for home. Unfortunately, I didn’t pay full attention to what I was doing as I pulled out into the traffic. The next thing I remember was when I woke up in County General.
Chapter Eight – Starting over
Sarah
‘Oh my …’ I tried to sit up but I felt a rush of blood to my head. I struggled to focus but I could just about make out Aunt Suze.
‘Just lie still, sweetheart, you’re gonna be just fine.’
‘What happened?’
‘Well, let’s put it this way, next time you want to start taking the bus to school you can just tell me. You don’t have to throw yourself and my scooter at the nearest passing motorist!’
‘You’re kidding me? Oh hell, I’m so sorry, Aunt Suze. I’ll pay for it, I promise.’
‘No you won’t. I don’t care about the stupid damn scooter. You are OK, that’s the only thing that matters. Now you get some rest. I have to go and let your dad know what’s happened. I’ll be back tomorrow.’
As she left the ward I could feel myself fading out and before I knew it, it was morning.
As a result of the accident I had two broken ribs and a broken wrist. The doctor said that if the driver had been going any faster it could have been a lot worse. Although I felt quite sore I didn’t feel nearly as bad as you’d have expected; so much so that after one long and very boring day in the hospital the doctor agreed I was OK to go home.
‘You need to get plenty of rest, though, young lady. Understood?’ he said, over the top of his glasses that perched precariously on the end of his nose.
‘Don’t you worry, Doctor,’ piped Aunt Suze, ‘she will!’ And she wasn’t kidding!
Being stuck in at home was only slightly less boring than being stuck in the hospital. Day three, however, bought a little light relief when there came a knock at the door. I have to say I was more than a little shocked to open it and see Erik stood there.
‘Hi. I … erm … I heard about the accident. I have a free period so I thought I’d come see how you are.’
‘Oh … erm … right, OK, wanna come in?’ I stammered, almost as clumsily as he had.
Erik smiled and just nodded before following me into the lounge.
The first few minutes were really awkward. Polite phrases like, ‘So how are you feeling?’, ‘Does it hurt?’ You know what I mean; no threat to Jay Leno that’s for sure.
‘It doesn’t hurt that much really. Have I missed anything at school? Any gossip?’ I said cheerily, trying to keep things light.
Erik raised his eyebrows at this, almost in disapproval.
‘I’m sorry, that was a bit shallow. It’s just this is a bit weird, you know, after the photo and all.’
‘Would you rather I went?’
‘No. No. Not at all.’
Erik was the only visitor I’d had all week. Aunt Suze was out the house by 6.30 a.m. and not back ’til around almost 4 p.m. I’d exhausted my DVD collection, and daytime movies weren’t up to much, not unless you’re into the whole ‘Who will love my children’ genre. I took a deep breath; I needed to try to rescue this somehow.
‘Shall we start over? Hi, I’m Sarah,’ I said, smiling as I held out my hand.
You could have cut the air with a knife as I waited what must have been an hour for his response; well actually it was probably more like three seconds but you know how painful these pauses can be.
‘Erik Zauber, pleased to meet you.’ He grinned broadly as he took my hand. ‘I’m not sure this is any less weird but hey, it beats the hell out of homework!’
We both laughed, loudly and genuinely. His laughter was infectious, I hadn’t noticed that before. His eyes were a dark bluey-gray and they lit up his face almost as much as his smile. Surely this wasn’t the same geek that had blanked me on my first day? The guy sat on the chair opposite me was attractive. No, it was more than that; he was hot, really hot. As he started to tell more about what he liked, about his brother, his favourite films, favourite bands I couldn’t help but let my mind wander. His voice was almost hypnotic, soothing, I started to imagine what it would be like if we got to know each better, if we dated even.