by Amy Durham
“Patsy is,” she replied. “That’s my husband’s grandmother. Her husband, William, died eight years ago.”
William and Patsy Emerson. Strange to think of someone else making their home in this house. Irrational though it was, I had begun to think of this place as always having belonged to Lucas and me.
I thanked Ashley, and promised to come back soon. Making my way out to my car, a thought occurred to me.
There had to be public records of property owners. Maybe even as far back as a hundred years. Of course, I had no idea how to go about finding such records, but they had to be in the courthouse or in some computer database.
If Lucas and I knew that William and Patsy Emerson had owned the house several years ago, could we possibly trace previous owners?
Could we maybe discover the names of the people we’d been seeing in our dreams?
Definitely something I should run past Lucas. But not today. And not tomorrow. At least not until we celebrated his birthday.
CHAPTER 18
Gwen’s plan to surprise Lucas was brilliant, if a little complicated. First, she feigned a headache that could only be helped by a specific herbal tea, available only at specialty health food store on the opposite side of Sky Cove from my house.
With Lucas safely out of the house, off to get the tea she needed, she pulled the casserole dish filled with garlic chicken breasts out of the refrigerator and put it in the oven to bake, calling me as soon as she finished. My mom, who was in on the plan, drove me down to Sky Cove Harbor, a tinier version of the harbor in nearby Camden, which was just about the halfway point between my house and Luke’s. Gwen met us there, and with only a split second to enjoy the view of the sailboats in and around the harbor, we hopped in her car and raced back to the house. From the harbor, the drive was just under ten minutes, and once there, she retrieved the homemade birthday cake from its hiding place in her office. How she’d managed to bake that and decorate it like running shoes without Luke’s knowledge was beyond me.
I’d been put me in charge of decorations, so while she tossed the salad, I set the table. In the center of each plate went a black and gold party hat. I sprinkled the middle of the table with gold confetti and hung a gold foil “18” from the light fixture above.
The chicken came out of the oven just as we heard Luke’s Bronco pull up to the house. Buttery garlic wafted through the kitchen.
“Showtime!” Gwen beamed.
“Got your tea, Mom,” came his voice from the living room. “Hey, what smells good?”
“Kitchen, Lucas,” she called.
He stepped into the room and the two of us shouted, “Surprise!”
For half a second, he seemed stunned, but then his eyes lit up and his beautiful smile began. He eyed the decorations on the table, the cake on the counter, and started laughing.
“You didn’t really have a headache, did you?”
Gwen shook her head, laughing too much to answer.
“Happy Birthday,” I said, stepping forward to hug him.
He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. Gwen moved to embrace us both, then scooted us all toward the table. She insisted Lucas and I sit while she served lunch.
The level of comfort I felt with Gwen continued to amaze me. I found myself, in many ways, anxious to confide in her about the dreams, to have her input on the situation. But, like Luke, I also felt reluctant, as if sharing it right now would be too personal.
At any rate, it was comforting to know we could talk to her and not worry she’d think we’d lost our minds.
My pitiful attempt at singing “Happy Birthday” was made tolerable by Gwen’s lyrical voice, and after cutting the cake and stuffing ourselves with devil’s food and chocolate buttercream frosting, Gwen announced it was time for presents.
He opened hers first. A new pair of running shoes, apparently the exact kind he’d been looking at for some time. I was certain Gwen had paid a pretty penny for them, but they were the kind of gift Lucas would consider practical and necessary. He’d have them broken in in no time.
I handed him my gift. He opened the card first, which was sweet, but not too sappy, the sentiment inside wishing a happy birthday to someone very special. I thought it struck just the right chord of acknowledgement of our relationship without being overly serious. He found the iTunes gift card inside and smiled. I’d discovered in the last week he did indeed have an iPod, but his playlists were sorely lacking. I’d even told him shuffling through his music was an endless loop of black and white newspaper print.
My heart skipped a beat when he reached for the little box and started unwrapping. Would he think it was stupid? Would he even remember?
But when he pulled the Tequila bottle saltshaker out, his laugh was instantaneous.
“Perfect,” he said, laughing and leaning over to kiss my cheek. “Love it!”
“I’m not even going to ask,” Gwen said, shaking her head and hopping up to clear the dishes from the table.
I offered to help with the clean up, but Gwen wouldn’t hear of it. She insisted that Lucas and I enjoy the rest of the afternoon together. Though it was nippy outside, the sun was out, and we opted for a walk.
At the door, Luke tossed me his X-Country hoodie again, and I pulled it over my head with a grin. I was beginning to think he liked seeing me in it.
I liked being in it.
We walked through the wooded area behind the house, down to the creek that formed the western perimeter of their property. The air was still, the slight breeze doing little more than making a soft rustling sound in the trees. I decided the peacefulness of the moment was right for telling him what I’d thought of.
“I had an idea,” I told him, as we walked hand in hand along the creek bank. “Some research we could do that might give us some information about the people in the dreams.”
“Let’s hear it.” His voice was playful, carefree.
I enjoyed this side of him a great deal, and I was glad we’d been able to spend a few days as normal teenagers. The reprieve was a welcome change.
“Well, when I went by Emerson’s yesterday to pick up your birthday gift, I got Ashley talking a bit about the house and about her husband’s family. Did you know her husband’s grandparents lived there?”
He shook his head. “I never paid a lot of attention to the house before, since I didn’t see it in my dreams until a few weeks ago. But thinking back, I guess it’s been empty as long as I can remember.”
“She said they lived there until the early nineties, and then moved to a retirement condo up in Camden. Their names were William and Patsy Emerson.”
“Interesting,” he said. “I wonder if it’s always been in the Emerson family?”
“I think it has been, at least for awhile. And, that’s kind of what my idea is.” I pulled to a stop, turning to face him. “There has to be some kind of public record, right? Of property deeds and owners? And if we know that William and Patsy Emerson owned the place, couldn’t we start there and work our way backwards? Maybe we could find the names of other people who lived there. Maybe even figure out who it is we’re seeing in these dreams and visions.”
Lucas crossed his arms over his chest, considering.
I went on. “I mean, it might be a long shot to think we could find out who they are, but we might run across something helpful.”
“You’re brilliant Layla.” He smiled at me, his brows drawing together in thought. “The records should be at the courthouse.”
“Someone might think we’re a bit weird,” I said. “Two high school students digging through old records.”
“Maybe not.” He tilted his head to one side. “I could just say I’m doing some genealogy research. It wouldn’t exactly be untrue.”
“Well, whenever you have time, just let me know.”
We started walking again, this time back toward the house. Lucas remained lost in thoughts. The silence between us was comfortable, and I didn’t feel the need to fill it.
He’d talk again when he had something more to say.
But the quietness seemed such a change from his jovial mood earlier.
“I wanted to talk to you about how we are at school,” he finally said.
“Okay.” I felt a bit confused. He hadn’t been any different at school than he’d always been.
“I know I haven’t exactly been affectionate with you publicly.” He stopped walking to lean against the trunk of a large Birch tree. “I’ve been that way on purpose, I realize I should give you an explanation.”
I leaned against a neighboring tree, the branches casting spidery shadows on the ground.
His words had completely lost me.
“Explanation?” I asked.
“It’s not that I’m having second thoughts about you, and it’s certainly not that I’m embarrassed to be with you.” He crossed his arms and eyed me from head to toe. “But this situation we’re in is so not typical.”
Confused, I looked at him. I had no idea where he was going, nor had I been upset with him for not engaging in public displays of affection.
“The dreams and visions are so clear and vivid now,” he said. “Much, much more than they’ve ever been. Not just the pictures I see, but the emotions I feel. I know it’s the same for you – that you can feel what she felt. And this man, he was so afraid, so worried. And it wasn’t for himself. It was for her. He was scared for her. He knew they were in danger and he wanted to save her from it. He wanted to spare her somehow.”
I knew this of course, but I hadn’t really stopped to think about how the emotions would affect Lucas differently than me. I may have only been sixteen, but I’d seen enough to know that men – good men, I amended – wanted to protect the people they cared about. Last weekend, on the beach, Lucas mentioned feeling helpless in the dream, afraid that whatever had happened to him would happen to me next. And he’d been completely powerless.
“Lucas, it wasn’t real,” I whispered. “I know it was scary, but it was a dream.”
“I know that in here,” he said, tapping his index finger to his temple. He placed his hand on his chest, over his heart. “But in here I know that it did happen. Maybe not to us in the present, but at some point, however long ago, it happened to those people who are channeling into us now.”
He was right. I had no doubt that what I’d seen and felt in that dream did indeed occur.
“And I can’t help but wonder if history might repeat itself,” he said, hands now shoved in his pockets. “I mean maybe not in that exact way, but Layla, if the man and woman we’ve seen in our visions have been reincarnated through us, who’s to say that the bad people, the people who hurt us, haven’t also been reincarnated?”
I opened my mouth to argue, then closed it abruptly. It seemed preposterous at first, but once it began to sink in I had to admit it was worth considering. It was crazy enough that Luke and I were now conduits for these people from the past. Why was it any crazier to believe the villains of the story might be channeling into someone else?
I shivered from the thought of it.
“I know I’m probably overreacting, but not being able to protect you in that dream was horrible enough. If something happened in the now and I was helpless to protect you – ” he broke off. “That would devastate me.”
“It would kill me to not be able to help you, too,” I said, moving to stand directly in front of him. “But please tell me what this has to do with you not being openly affectionate with me in public. Which, by the way, I haven’t noticed and it doesn’t bother me.”
Still leaned against the tree, he rested his hands lightly on my shoulders. “I look back on things now, little things that maybe wouldn’t seem significant otherwise, and I can’t help but wonder if they’re connected to all this somehow.”
“What things?”
“The incident with Miller the first day of school, for one,” he said.
“He did apologize later.”
“Yeah, and I’m glad, but even that worries me. What was his motivation for apologizing? Was it genuine?”
“You weren’t kidding about worrying.”
“Nope,” he said. “And there’s more. All these guys asking you out, all for the first football game.”
I narrowed my eyes at him. Luke hadn’t seemed like the jealous type before. Although, I had to admit, thinking he might be a little jealous was kind of exhilarating.
“Not that it’s weird that they’d want to date you,” he said quickly, reaching out to take my hand. “I mean look at you. And I’m not going to pretend I wasn’t a little jealous.”
Um... wow.
“You don’t have to be,” I whispered.
“I take nothing for granted, including your feelings.” He smiled. “But it’s the timing. Three guys, all in the same week and after we’d started spending time together at school, all for the same event, which just happened to be the day that we had the first disturbing visions. And the fact that Lance asked, too.”
“Lance? I thought you guys were friends.”
“We are, sort of,” he answered. “But Lance, well, he’s always trying to one-up me. Whatever I can do he’s done it already or can do it bigger and better. It’s annoying, but I just ignore him.”
“You think he asked me out just because it seemed like you and I were getting closer?”
“That sounds so insulting, like I think he wouldn’t want to date you for any other reason. And I don’t mean it like that.” He pushed away from the tree trunk and paced. “But it’s almost like the universe was conspiring to keep you away from me. To convince you to choose someone else.”
“The universe can forget it.” About this I was firm.
He laughed, and the sound of it slid into my ears and under my skin.
Then he turned serious. “Maybe we ought to let the universe think it’s winning. Or at least that it’s stalled us.”
My heart dropped. It must’ve showed on my face, because he hurried to explain.
“My concern is if I make a claim on you, I mean like a real claim, that you’re mine and everyone else better back off, if there is someone out there who’s the embodiment of the people who hurt us in that dream – ” he stopped and looked right into my eyes. “That it might set them off, aggravate them, spur them into some kind of action.”
I didn’t like the thought of that. Whatever had happened on the other side of that rock outcropping had been bad enough in my dream, and I’d only heard it. I couldn’t image experiencing it in real life. The only option was to prevent it from happening.
Our relationship, whatever it was, hadn’t been exactly public so far, and I’d been fine with that. So why did the idea of keeping it mostly between the two of us bother me?
“We can’t run scared, Luke,” I said, taking him by the hand. “As much as I’d like to. I think we have to see it through, find out what happened to the people in the visions.”
“You’re right, I know. But I think we’ve got to be careful.” He squeezed my hand. “And I just wanted to make sure you understood about the hand-holding and kissing, or lack thereof, at school and around the other kids.”
I nodded. “Honestly, Lucas, I’d barely noticed, and wasn’t bothered by it at all. I mean, some people are just private about those sorts of things. And I don’t mind keeping some things just between us.”
I told myself it was foolish to read more into his suggestion of privacy than what he’d just said. It was precaution, pure and simple.
“That’s a relief.” He kissed the top of my head. “Now when are we going searching at the courthouse?”
CHAPTER 19
It came to me that night. The insecurity and fear. The stupid, weak, teenage-girl lack of confidence I’d always despised.
It found me as I relaxed in my bed, house quiet, trying to sleep, my iPod ringing last year’s playlist. The music reminded me of my last school year in Nashville, and, of course, Adrienne. Or, more specifically, of Adrienne’s boyfriend Chase, who had love
d her so much he told her it was imperative their relationship remain a secret. He’s said no one but them should know the true extent of their feelings. She’d believed him, of course, thinking his desire for secrecy some great romantic gesture. When all the while it had only been a phobia of commitment that had him requesting her silence.
Well, that and a girl from Murfreesboro named Candi.
And this afternoon, Lucas had said much the same to me. The truth of our relationship should not be common knowledge at school. Before our conversation in the woods behind his house, the private nature of our status had been nothing to think about.
Now it was a source of anxiety.
Not that I thought Luke had another girl on the side. No way could I think that about him. But I wondered about the typical I’m-a-guy-which-means-I’m-afraid-of-commitment idea.
Could it be he was having second thoughts about us?
What if my semi-happy card and inside-joke birthday gift had scared him off?
The seriousness of our situation could not be escaped, though it really wasn’t of our own doing. Which made it rather difficult for us to have a normal dating relationship. I understood that, and I knew Lucas did too.
I thought back to those first weeks of school, before the dreams started. When the attention he showed me excited me and made me feel special, and the only thing I worried about was whether Miller-the-idiot would strike again or if I’d burn myself on a hot crucible in chemistry lab.
And then something occurred to me.
All that time, when I’d been flattered by Luke’s interest, thinking about him and how cute he was and how I’d really like to know him better, he’d already seen me. He’d seen me before school even started. He’d seen my face in his dreams before he’d seen me in person.
It had seemed so sweet, so poignant before, when he described seeing my face in his visions. He’d said I was beautiful. And when he’d told me what he’d thought when he first saw me at school – Finally, she’s here – my heart had simply overflowed with emotion.