That’s it. She blinked. That’s the slogan.
Passion encompassed so many things. It would work for any of Cody’s guests. There were so many things she’d discovered she was passionate about. Life, love, the outdoors, adventure, peace and quiet, horses, cattle ... Cody. And she’d found it all right here in his arms.
She leaned back and looked him in the eye as she spoke from the heart. “Whatever your passion, your destiny awaits you at Rafferty’s Remote Ranch.”
He stared at her for several seconds, then smiled and whispered in her ear, “It’s perfect. You’re perfect.”
Storm clouds rolled in, matching the same swirling gray of his eyes. At the first fat raindrop, she said, “Cody, I,” but a cowboy whispered something to the band and stepped up to the microphone.
The crowd grew silent.
“Excuse me, folks. Before the rest of the evening is washed out, I have a question I’d like to ask a very special lady.” He turned to one of Cassie’s dudettes, and her eyes grew huge. When he reached out his hand and she took it, he got down on one knee.
The woman started to cry.
“Aw, sweetheart. Please don’t cry. I know a rough ole cowboy like myself has no right asking an angel like you to be his wife, but I love you with all my heart.” He swept his hat from his head. “If you’ll let me, I’ll spend the rest of my life making you smile.” His voice dropped to an emotional whisper, and his eyes grew misty. “You’ll be happy with me. I swear it. I’d do anything for you, honey.”
The woman let out a choked sob and threw herself into the cowboy’s arms, knocking him over. “Yes. Oh, yes. I love you so much.”
Picking her up, he spun her around then threw his hat in the air. “Yeehaw! Did you hear that folks? She said yes.”
The crowd went wild.
Cody grabbed Monica’s hand. “Come on. We need to talk. There’s something I have to tell you.”
Her heart sped up, nearly beating out of her chest. She loved him, no denying it. Could he possibly love her back? She’d felt it in their lovemaking, and he’d looked at her with adoring eyes. But if Cody told her, what would she say? There was no way he would move, and she couldn’t abandon her father until she found someone suitable to take her place as CEO, providing Cody decided to use her campaign. The chances seemed good he’d like the rest, given his reaction to the slogan.
Cody led her to her cabin and refrained from speaking then pulled her inside and turned to close the door. Leaning his head against the wall, he stayed still for a moment and finally faced her. He opened his mouth, but no words emerged.
He’s nervous, she thought, melting inside. Wanting to ease his nerves, she put her arms around him, meaning only to give him a kiss of encouragement. Their passion ignited, burning like a wildfire out of control.
He swept her up and carried her to the bed, never breaking the kiss, and kissed her desperately as if it were the last time. Then he turned tender as he laid her on the bed and undressed her. He tugged off his own clothes and slipped in beside her, using his lips and hands to bring her senses alive.
So much unspoken emotion poured out of him, she couldn’t help but shed tears. When he entered her, a single tear of his own escaped to roll down his cheek. Monica thought she’d never loved anyone more. There had to be a way to make this work.
Words were hard for Cody, but he was showing her what she meant to him with heart, body and soul. When she looked into his eyes, she inhaled a sharp breath. He loved her, too. She could see it clear as day. It touched her deeper than she ever thought possible, erasing any lingering fears she had left.
They were meant to be together. In the quiet aftermath of the most heartfelt, emotional and loving moment of her life, they both spoke.
“Monica, I--”
“Cody, I--”
He said, “Ladies first.”
“Okay, I know what you want to say, so why shouldn’t the woman be the one to say it?” She couldn’t believe she was saying this. She rolled on top of him, inhaling his musky scent, and then rested her chin on her hands.
He let out a huge breath. “Okay. If it makes you feel better to be the one to do it, then go right ahead, honey.”
When he looked at her with sympathy, she said, “Some people have an easier time expressing emotion, that’s all.” She trembled with the thought of laying her heart on the line, but he was worth it.
“Cody, I’ve loved you for so long now, it seems. I tried to deny it, tried to convince myself it was just about the sex, but it wasn’t. It was about so much more than that.”
He opened his mouth as if to say something, but she covered it. She had to finish this. “I came here to help my father, and I did. Once he sees that you’re going to use my campaign, at least I hope you are, he’ll take me seriously and appoint me as CEO instead of Wendell.”
“Monica, there’s something I still have to tell you.”
“Wait, I’m not done. I have it all worked out. I’ll find a suitable replacement for my position, and then I can move here. I’ve always wanted to focus on my art full-time, and they have some great studios in Denver. Maybe I can even land a show, or something, so it can work. We can be together.” She trailed her fingertips over his cheekbones, feeling the rough whiskers beneath her hand.
“Monica, you don’t understand.”
“I do, really. You’re a little gun-shy since Barbara, but I know it can work for us. After Wendell, I’d pretty much given up on finding a decent guy, but then I met you. You’re about as honest as they come.”
He rolled out of bed, not quite meeting her eyes. “I’m not going to use your campaign.”
“Wh-What do you mean?” She scooted back and pulled the covers up to her chin.
“I’ve decided not to advertise at all.” He looked her square in the eye with no trace of emotion.
“But you haven’t even seen my campaign. How do you know you won’t like it?” She bit her lip as the first seed of doubt took root in her stomach, making her want to throw up.
He stood there with his hands on his hips, his face blank, yet somehow cold. “Doesn’t matter. The point is I don’t need it. Business is booming, so I’ve changed my mind.”
“Cody, please, you can’t change your mind. My father’s company depends on me pulling off this campaign. If you don’t like it, then Wendell will--”
“Wendell’s not my problem.” He sat on the edge of the bed but didn’t look at her. “I’m a business man, Monica. I have to think of myself first. I’m sorry.” He met her eyes. “Our time is over.”
She sucked in a sharp breath. “Then what was all of th-that about?” she asked hysterically, pointing to the bed.
“Just saying good-bye.”
“Why?” She scooted forward, holding the sheet against her breasts and rested her hand on his arm.
He flinched and stood. “What we had was a fling. Nothing more, nothing less. We both knew that going into this.”
She scrambled off the bed and wrapped the covers around her body. “Cody, please, this is crazy. There has to be a way to work this out. I love you. I know that you love me, too. That’s all that matters.” She stepped toward him but froze at the chill that blanketed his face.
* * *
Cody couldn’t believe it. Monica still wanted him, even though he’d turned down her campaign, but he’d given his word to her father. Cody couldn’t tell her about the phony campaign until her dad had enough dirt on Wendell and who he worked for, though it was only a matter of time before she returned home and found out. Then she’d despise him. Better now than later. He couldn’t go through the pain of falling in love with her and then losing her. She would have grown bored over time, anyway, so he decided to push her away before she did it to him.
He swallowed hard and felt the same icy chill he felt when he thought he’d lost her after the plane crash. He struggled to mask his face the way he used to and keep the emotion out of his voice as he forced the words out. “Who said I loved you?”
“Well, um ....” Her face flamed, and she began to shake all over as she clutched the covers tighter.
“No one said anything about love, and we definitely didn’t say forever.”
When she reeled, he reached out, but she sneered, “Don’t touch me.” Her face contorted into a mask of pain. “God, why do I choose men who are incapable of loving me back?”
Cody clenched his jaw, fighting hard to remain passive. All he wanted to do was take her in his arms and beg her to stay, but he couldn’t. He’d never felt more helpless in his life.
“Yeah, well, you were right. Thanks to you, I have to go back and come up with a new plan,” she cried out. “And I don’t love you, either. I don’t even like you.” She lifted dead eyes. “In fact, right now I think I hate you,” she whispered in a shaky voice. “Get out.”
He couldn’t move.
She shouted, “I said get out!”
Cody didn’t trust himself to say a word, so he turned and walked out of the cabin and out of her life. The door clicked softly behind him. It was done. He took one step and hesitated when he heard the anguished sobs from within. His heart nearly stopped beating, squeezing the life right out of his chest. Why did it hurt so much?
Had he made a mistake? He couldn’t think about that. He closed his eyes, feeling ill, then forced his feet to move, taking him back to the homestead. For a short period of time, he’d found heaven. He was thankful for that, would never regret it, but life would be worse than it was before.
He had no soul now.
He’d left it behind that cabin door, with the woman who’d stolen his heart. It was better this way. He’d kept his end of the deal with her father, and Wendell wouldn’t win. She would get what she wanted, and he wouldn’t get burned when she realized she made a mistake by staying with him. This way, everyone won.
So why did he feel like the bigger loser around?
* * *
Monica packed her things, feeling numb. It was the middle of the night, and she couldn’t cry anymore. She’d shed all the tears she had left. All her hard work, and the man didn’t want to use her campaign. She didn’t get it, but she could live with it. He was a business man, after all.
She had a lot more information on Wendell, so she might still be able to talk some sense into her father. The part she couldn’t live with was knowing her cowboy didn’t love her. She’d told herself she would be happy with a fling. That there would be no regrets. She didn’t regret the amazing experience she’d had, but she did regret falling in love.
She’d never imagined it could hurt so much. She had to leave. She couldn’t sleep, and she didn’t want to chance running into him again. She couldn’t even say his name. It was too painful.
She called the airport and moved up her flight. She would be gone before he ever got up. Then she called Cassie, who agreed to take her to the airport when Monica told her she had a family emergency.
Well, that much wasn’t a lie. She was dying of a broken heart, and right now she needed her family. Tonight. She called Natalie next who, for once, didn’t object. Nat knew exactly what Monica’s emergency was. Like a true best friend, she agreed to pick Monica up from the airport, no questions asked. No questions asked was huge, for Nat.
Several hours later, they were on the highway heading home. The silence became deafening, so Nat spoke. “Monica, I know it’s none of my business, but--”
“You’re right. It’s none of your business,” Monica snapped back, hating the uncharacteristic bitterness tingeing her voice. “And you agreed to no questions.”
Nat’s eyebrows drew together, and her lips pursed. “Okay. I’ll let that one slide because something is obviously eating you up inside. I just want to help. Does it have anything to do with Co--”
“Don’t say that man’s name in my presence ever again.”
Nat glanced at her in startled surprise. “Dammit. I knew you’d fall for him. It was supposed to be about sex, Mo. That’s all.”
“Not now, Nat.”
Shaking her head, she looked back at the highway. “Okay, I won’t say his name. Do you want to talk about it?”
“No. I don’t know.” Monica’s voice dropped to an emotional whisper. “I’m afraid if I do, I’ll start crying again.”
“Wow, o-okay, honey, I’m here. I won’t ask any more questions, I promise. You’re going to be fine.”
“Yeah, I know I will.” She turned and looked out the window. “But I’ll never be whole again.”
Natalie didn’t say a word, but took Monica back to her apartment. Monica didn’t put up a protest. She ate a little, then after a long hot bath, she curled up on Natalie’s couch with a cup of tea. The bath and the tea had thawed her out of her frozen state and into a consuming need to talk.
She spilled her guts about everything that had transpired since the first time she and Cody made love. Nat wrapped her in the support of her arms while she wept, until she was left with nothing but exhaustion and a nasty case of hiccups.
Nat said, “I’ve been thinking about what you said earlier about you-know-who. I’ve been taking this new self-defense class. I could always give him a couple black eyes. Kinda sounds like fun.”
“Natalie. You will not lay one hand on Co … his head.”
“I thought you didn’t like him anymore.”
“I never said I didn’t like him.”
“Yes, you did. You said you hated him.”
“I was hurt at the time. I wanted to hurt him back.” Monica chewed her bottom lip. “Look. What I said or didn’t say doesn’t really matter. He doesn’t love me. He said so.”
“Oh, I get it. You said things you didn’t mean to him, so he probably said things he didn’t mean to you, too.”
“Exactly.” She frowned. “Wait. I mean, no.”
“Why not? Isn’t it possible? Maybe he only said he didn’t love you to get you to leave.”
“You didn’t see his face. I heard him. He meant every single word.”
“You sure about that?”
“Yes. No. I don’t know.”
“Well, I’m going to jump in the shower. Think on that for a while. You’re a smart woman, Mo. Trust your instincts. Trust in what you knew to be true before last night.” She ran upstairs, leaving Monica confused.
Could Nat be right? Monica didn’t know what to think anymore. Or what to do.
* * *
“Hey, shrimp, what’re you doing here?” Cody tried to force some enthusiasm into his voice, but failed big-time. He must look like hell. He hadn’t slept at all last night. “Don’t you have some dudes to ship off?”
“Ha. Seems you already took care of one of them for me,” Cassie ground out from his office doorway.
His head snapped up, his eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”
“Like you don’t know.” She glared at him.
“No. I don’t.” He kept his voice calm and careful as he struggled to hold onto his temper. “Why don’t you tell me?”
“She’s gone. Mo is gone forever, and it’s all your fault.”
He flinched as the pain knifed through him with the sharp blade of regret, then he hid his reaction behind his emotionless mask. Not quite quick enough.
“She called me up in the middle of the night and said she needed to leave early because of a family emergency, but I know it had something to do with you.” Cassie’s tone softened. “Why, Cody? Why are you fighting this? You two are so perfect together. Can you honestly tell me you don’t love her?”
“I ... it would never work, so drop it.” He opened his filing cabinet and filed the papers he’d been working on.
“No.”
“No?” He stood and stared at her. He didn’t need this right now. Why was she pushing him so hard?
“You heard me. I said no. I won’t drop it.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
“Dammit, Cassie. You don’t have a say in this, so let it the hell go,” he roared, sweeping past her into the barn.
She was hot on his heels. “I do have a say. Monica is my friend, and it’s obvious she loves you. I will not stand by and see you hurt her.”
He swung around and glared at Cassie with such intensity, she stepped back. “I never wanted to hurt her. Can’t you see it’s killing me? There’s no other way, so leave it be please.” His shoulders slumped, and he went back to work.
“I can’t. I’m your sister. I love you, too.”
He paused with his back to her and hung his head.
“I just want to see you happy. You’ve been through so much. We’ve been through so much. You’ve always been there for me. Is it so hard to understand why I want to be here for you?”
“You can’t.” His voice was hoarse. He couldn’t quite hide the pain as he mumbled, “No one can.”
“Why? She loves you, and even though you won’t admit it, you love her too. What else matters?”
He turned to face her. “It’s not that simple.”
“I’m listening,” she said with such love in her eyes he relented.
“Have a seat. This may take a while.”
They sat on a bale of hay, side by side, but he couldn’t look at her. “I know what it’s like to be deceived. She’ll hate me when she finds out what I’ve done.”
Cassie shook her head and started to protest.
He cut her off with a slice of his hand. “I can’t take her thinking she’s in love with me and deciding to stay, only to discover down the road that it’s not enough for her. I’m not enough for her. It was bad enough with Barbara. I don’t think I could take that from Monica.” He stood and began to pace.
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