He didn’t have to close his eyes to see the other men. They were with him, always. “I don’t know why I made it and they didn’t. I only know that when my friends dragged me out of there, I knew I was never going back. I was never going to risk their pain. I had learned my lesson.”
What if he’d known about Carter, he thought grimly. How much worse things would have been. How—
Or was that true? He’d had nothing to miss, which he’d always seen as a strength, but he’d also had nothing to live for. Once he’d been rescued, he’d had nothing to keep him moving forward except the knowledge that he was alive.
Morgan had talked about being unable to fit in and how his Audrey had saved him. Would Carter have made a difference? Would Felicia?
The phone lines lit up. Gideon figured he was going to get an earful and pushed the first one.
“Don’t you think you’ve been punished enough?” a woman asked. “Gideon, there’s no reason to blame yourself for surviving when those other men didn’t. Only God knows the answer, and if you spend too much time asking, you’ll waste what you’ve been given. A chance with your son and Felicia. That’s the real crime. Not that you lived, but that you’re not living now.”
He didn’t recognize the voice, and he had no idea who she was. “All right,” he said slowly. “Uh, thanks for calling.”
The second caller was a man. “War is hell. Thanks for serving, son. Thanks to all who serve. Now, walk away from what you did and walk toward what matters. When you’re old and ready to meet your maker you’re not going to be thinking about what you did or what you owned. You’re going to be thinking about the people you love. So get to it.”
There were several more calls just like that, followed by what sounded like a teenage girl requesting less “really old songs and more Justin Bieber.”
“I’ll see what I can do,” Gideon said with a chuckle and hung up.
He leaned back in his chair. This was what Felicia wanted, he thought, getting it for the first time. A community to care. People who would tell her when she was being an idiot and when she was on track. A safety net and all the other clichés about being surrounded by people who loved you and whom you loved back.
He stood, prepared to claim, to be a part of this. Then the memories were back, the screams, the pain. The knowledge that even though his body was alive, he’d already given up. And by giving up, he was dead.
The red button flashed. Someone was at the back door. He tore off his headphones and raced to the rear of the building. When he jerked open the door, he grimaced.
“You,” he grumbled.
Angel raised his eyebrows. “I was expecting more of a greeting.”
“You’re not who I was expecting.”
His friend studied him. “No. I’m not who you wanted. No offense, but you’re not my type, either. I came to finish your shift.”
“What do you mean?”
“You can’t leave dead air out there. I’ve watched you put the CDs in and push the button. I can do it.”
“I’m not leaving.”
Angel shook his head. “You’re as stupid as you look. You’re leaving because a woman like Felicia comes along once in a lifetime. Because if you don’t go after her, someone else will. You’ve been given a second chance. Didn’t that guru guy in Bali teach you anything? The only way to heal what’s wrong with you inside is to love her and trust her.”
“Like you know anything about being in love?” Gideon paused, belatedly remembering that Angel’s wife and son had been killed. “I’m sorry,” he said quickly. “I’m sorry.”
Something flashed in Angel’s eyes. A sharp pain that cut to the soul. Gideon recognized it because he’d felt it himself.
“Apology accepted,” Angel said. “Having gone through what I did, I know you’ll regret losing Felicia until your last breath. I know that you’ve finally found where you belong, and there’s no way you can stay here without her. What’s that line from that stupid movie? She completes you, bro. Only it’s more than that. You have a woman who understands you and a kid like Carter and you’re confused?”
Gideon felt as if someone had hit him on the side of the head with a two-by-four. For a second, the world went dark and quiet, and then it all cleared again. He had been looking for answers about why he had survived and there were none. Or maybe the answer was twofold: Carter and Felicia.
He looked at his friend, the one who had risked his own life to pull him from that Taliban prison.
“I owe you,” he said quietly.
“Yeah, I know. Now get out of here.”
Gideon pulled his truck keys from his pocket and headed for the parking lot. He turned back and yelled, “Keep it clean. We have kids listening.”
Angel laughed.
* * *
FELICIA DROVE QUICKLY but carefully. She was willing to go five miles over the speed limit but not much more. Not while still in town.
“This is taking forever,” Carter grumbled.
“I don’t want to get in an accident.”
“I know. Sorry. I’m nervous.”
That was one word, Felicia thought. Terrified was another. Because while listening to Gideon, she’d realized she’d done exactly the wrong thing when she’d walked away. She’d taken the easy way out. Sure, she’d been hurt, but she’d also been scared. She hadn’t stood up for herself. She hadn’t told him what she wanted. She hadn’t made it clear she loved him.
Gideon was dealing with a past that would have killed most men and had caused the death of nearly a half-dozen excellent soldiers. He would never be like everyone else, but that was why she loved him. Because of who he was now.
She turned left to head out to the radio station and saw a truck driving into town. She slammed on the brakes. The truck driver did the same.
She was out of her car in a second and running across the street. The truck door opened, and Gideon got out. They stared at each other. Behind her she heard a car door slam and assumed Carter was joining them.
Gideon looked wonderful, she thought, her heart aching. Tall and strong. Loyal. There were ghosts, but she was comfortable with his past. He would always have issues, but no one was better at logistical planning than she was. They could figure it out together.
“I heard your show,” she began. “We both did. That was brave.”
“No. Brave isn’t telling the truth.”
“Sometimes it is. Sometimes it’s easier to keep the secret. What if they’d confirmed your darkest fears? That you didn’t deserve to be the one who survived?”
He flinched. “How did you know?”
“You weren’t grateful to be alive. You were trying to figure out how to be strong, but you also suffered from survivor’s guilt. A natural result of what you went through.”
“Got a flowchart for that?”
“I could make one.” She paused and held out her arm. Carter joined them.
Gideon looked at his son. There were explanations, he thought. For later.
He reached for the boy and held him tight. “I’m never letting go,” he promised. “No matter what. I’m so grateful to have you in my life. I have a lot of work to do to show you how important you are to me. I’ve been...scared. Scared to let you in. Scared to disappoint you.”
“Dad.” Carter’s voice was muffled. “We’re going to be okay.”
“Yes, we are, son. We are.”
Felicia fought her own tears, watching the two men she cared about most finally connect. It was so perfect.
She drew in a breath, knowing it was her turn to be brave. “I’ve been keeping secrets, too. I didn’t tell you I love you, Gideon, and I do. I want you and me and Carter to be a family. I want us to get married and have more children.”
One corner of Gideon’s mouth turned up. “That sounded a whole lot like a proposal.”
“Oh. I hadn’t considered that. I meant it to be informational. I would never propose. Socially, that’s the man’s purview, even if the truth is women hol
d families together much more than men. Women are also happier when they live alone, whereas men do better when they have a partner.”
“Felicia,” Carter hissed.
She turned to him. “What?”
“You’re getting off the point.”
“Oh, you’re right.” She looked back at Gideon. “I wasn’t proposing.”
“As long as that’s clear. But you’re saying I can’t be happy without you.”
“I didn’t mean that, exactly.” Why was this so hard? She loved him and wanted them to be together. She wanted to stop hurting inside and know that she could give her heart to him.
“Gideon, I—”
He moved closer and touched his fingers to her mouth. “You need to be quiet now.”
His hand settled on her waist, and he pulled her against him. She went willingly, needing to feel the heat of him. In his arms, she’d found her home. Without him, she was broken. She would stay strong, for Carter’s sake, but she wasn’t looking forward to the struggle.
“I’m sorry for all I put you through.” He looked past her. “You, too, son.”
“That’s okay, Dad.”
Gideon smiled. “Okay.” He returned his attention to her. “You never waver, Felicia, never take the easy way out. I admire you and I respect you. I want us to be together. You, me and Carter. Carter and I need you.” He looked at Carter, who nodded. “We love you, Felicia.”
She flung her arms around him and hung on, knowing she would never let go.
“All right!” Carter cheered. “I’m heading back to the car now, and I’m going to turn up the radio, if you guys want to kiss awhile.”
“I kind of do,” Gideon admitted, settling his mouth onto hers.
Felicia sank into him. In the distance, she heard Angel’s voice coming from the speakers in Gideon’s truck. “This one is for a very special couple. Unless my friend is an idiot, which is a real possibility.”
Gideon chuckled. “I wonder what song he—”
Sonny and Cher’s “I’ve Got You, Babe” began to play. Gideon raised his head and groaned. “No way. I hate that song.” He touched her cheek. “Please don’t make me dance to it at our wedding.”
“Was that a proposal?”
“No. It was the promise of one. I thought I’d do it more privately when we’re alone.” He took her hands in his. “Please come home, Felicia. I miss you, and I miss my son.”
“Can I drive?” Carter asked.
“I thought you weren’t listening,” Gideon said, his voice amused.
“Sorry.”
Felicia smiled up at him. “I’ll follow you,” she promised as she reluctantly stepped back.
“No way,” he told her. “You’re going to lead. You’ve always known the right way home.”
* * * * *
Keep reading for an excerpt from Just One Kiss by Susan Mallery!
Can first love turn into the real deal in a sizzling new Fool’s Gold story from New York Times bestselling author Susan Mallery?
If you loved Two of a Kind, don’t miss the next title in New York Times bestselling author Susan Mallery’s new Fool’s Gold trilogy, available wherever ebooks are sold.
Three Little Words (August 2013)
Can’t wait? Enjoy the entire Fool’s Gold backlist:
Just One Kiss
“Halfway There” (novella)
Summer Days
Summer Nights
All Summer Long
“Almost Summer” (novella)
Only Mine
Only Yours
Only His
“Only Us” (novella)
Chasing Perfect
Almost Perfect
Finding Perfect
A Fool’s Gold Christmas
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CHAPTER ONE
“TRIM UP my eyebrows,” Alfred said, wiggling his white, bushy brows as he spoke. “I want to look sexy.”
Patience McGraw held in a smile. “Big night planned with the missus?”
“You know it.”
A concept that would be romantic, if Alfred and his lovely wife were a tad younger than, say, ninety-five. Patience had to keep herself from blurting out a warning that, at their age, they should be careful. She supposed the more important lesson was that true love and passion could last a lifetime.
“I’m jealous,” she told her client as she carefully trimmed his brows.
“You picked a piss-poor excuse of a man,” Albert told her, then shrugged. “Excuse my French.”
“I can’t complain about you telling the truth,” Patience said, wondering what it would be like to live in a bigger city. Where everyone didn’t know every detail of your personal life. But she’d been born in Fool’s Gold and had grown up with the idea that there were very few secrets between friends and neighbors.
Which meant the whole town knew that she’d gotten pregnant when she was eighteen and the “piss-poor excuse for a man” who’d been her baby’s father had walked out on her and her daughter less than a year later.
“You’ll find someone,” Alfred told her, gently patting her arm. “A pretty girl like you should have them lined up for miles.”
She smiled. “You’re very sweet. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were flirting with me.”
Alfred gave her a wink.
Despite his compliments, she managed to find herself amazingly man free. Fool’s Gold wasn’t exactly swimming with prospects, and as a single mother, she had to be especially careful. There was also the fact that most of the men she met weren’t interested in other men’s kids.
As Patience picked up the scissors to clip a couple of errant hairs, she told herself that she was very comfortable with her life. Given the choice, she would rather open her own business than fall in love. But every now and then, she found herself longing for someone to lean on. A man to care about, who would be there for her.
She stood back and studied Albert’s reflection. “You’re even more handsome than before,” she said, putting down her tools and unfastening his cape.
“Hard to believe,” Albert said with a grin.
She laughed.
“Patience?”
She didn’t recognize the male voice, but turned anyway. A man stood in the entrance of the shop.
Her mind registered several things at once. Albert was her last appointment of the day. If the guy was a walk-in, he wouldn’t call her by name. The man was tall, with dark gold-blond hair and deep blue eyes. His shoulders were broad and he had the kind of face that would be happy up on a movie screen. Nice, but she had no idea who he...
She felt the cape flutter to the floor as she really looked at the man moving toward her. He was a few inches taller, a lot more muscular, but his eyes... They were exactly the same. They even crinkled when he smiled at her.
“Hello, Patience.”
She was fourteen again, standing in that empty house, more scared than she’d ever been in her life. There hadn’t been any answers. Not then or since. No solution to the mystery. Just questions and a gnawing sense that something had gone terribly wrong.
“Justice?” she asked, her voice more breath than sound. “Justice?”
He gave her a slight shrug. The familiar gesture was enough to send her flying across the shop. She flung herself at him, determined to hang on this time.
He caught her against him and held on to her nearly as tightly as she held on to him. He was warm and solid and real. She pressed her head against his shoulder and inhaled the scent of him.
A clean, masculine smell that had nothing to do with the boy she remembered. This wasn’t happening, she thought, still dazed. Justice couldn’t be back.
Yet he was. But the man was very different from the boy, and the moment got awkward quickly. She stepped away and put her hands on her hips.
“What happened? You left me! Where on earth did you go? I was so scared. The whole town was worried. I called the police and everything.”
He glanced around the salon. Patience didn’t have to follow his gaze to know they were the center of attention. She was used to the friendly interest of the shop, but Justice might find the attention uncomfortable.
“When can you take a break?” he asked.
“Five minutes. Alfred is my last client of the day.”
“I’ll be outside.”
He was gone before she could stop him, moving with a combination of power and purpose. The second the door closed behind him, the other stylists and half the clients descended.
“Who is he?” Julia, her boss, demanded. “What a handsome man.”
“I’ve seen him around town before,” another woman said. “With that ballet dancer. He was her bodyguard.”
“Has he moved here?”
“Is he an old boyfriend?”
Alfred cleared his throat. “Back away, ladies. Give Patience some room to breathe.”
Patience smiled at him gratefully. He paid her for the cut and gave her a fifty-cent tip. She was so not getting rich working here, she thought as she walked him to the door and kissed his cheek.
With Alfred gone, she returned to her station and quickly cleaned up. Julia watched with unconcealed interest.
“You’ll have details tomorrow?” she asked.
“Of course.”
Sharing was as much a part of the culture of Fool’s Gold as showing up with a casserole when there was a birth, death or serious illness. She might not want to reveal every detail of her upcoming encounter with a man from her past, but that wasn’t her decision.
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