His arms tightened around her. “It isn’t foolish. It is perfectly reasonable for that night to have a lasting effect.”
She started to turn away but he halted her with a slight touch to her chin. “You were only a child when your parents were killed. No one could have predicted the lightening would have struck the tree the same moment your parents were traveling alongside. And for the frightened horses to bolt when the falling branch struck the back of the carriage. One horrific carriage accident on a stormy night and your life was altered forever. So, yes, I understand you may have some residual fear. I only wish you would have told me.”
More tears threatened to fall at what he hadn’t said. That the bolting horses had dragged the mangled carriage before coming upon a narrow bridge. Sometimes she could still hear her mother’s scream as the carriage broke away from the horses and fell into the river. The servants had shielded her from witnessing the wreckage but it had taken years to get the sounds out of her head.
“And then what? You’d dry my tears as you did when I was nine.” She kept her eyes steady on him. “In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not that child anymore.”
A deep pause fell as he scanned her face and his brown eyes darken to black. “Of course I’ve noticed. I do nothing but notice.”
The words were rough, as if they’d been torn from him. As if he’d give anything to keep them inside.
When his eyes dropped, she glanced down and realized the sheet had fallen to her waist. Her breasts were clearly outlined through her shift. Her eyes flew back to him. He had yet to lift his gaze. His deep scrutiny sent a rush of sensations through her body, settling low in her belly.
She lifted her hand, noticing it trembled slightly, and laid it along his cheek, drawing his eyes back to hers. “Show me, Gabe. Show me you’ve noticed,” she whispered.
He groaned at her request. “God, Minx, you know how to push a man past the point of reason.”
Even though his words revealed his desire, she knew he held back.
“Please, Gabe.”
It didn’t seem possible but his eyes darkened even further. “Say it again.”
“Please, Gabe. Love me.”
His growl seemed to be ripped from him right before he cradled her face between his hands and kissed her. Welcoming the intimate taste of him, she closed her eyes and leaned into his body. Any remaining thoughts of her fear or the death of her parents vanished.
He released her lips. “I won’t ruin you by taking your virginity.” He peered deep into her eyes. “But you have to know, if I continue, this won’t end with a simple kiss.”
“I don’t want to stop with a kiss. I want all of you.” She didn’t know what she was asking for exactly, but there had to be more than he’d yet given her. Something she craved.
“Bloody hell, Minx. Don’t tempt me with such things.” She opened her mouth to plead for more, but he silenced her with a single finger to her lips. “I’m not saying someday I won’t make love to you, but not now. Not here. Your first time should be special. Not at an inn where your aunt is down the hall.” Muttered so softly, she almost missed him add, “And it should be with anyone but me.”
She wanted to argue with his reasoning but he distracted her by settling a light kiss on her lips. The caress, combined with the knowledge that he wanted to make love to her, made her yearn for him even more. In a feat that seemed far too easy, he swiftly repositioned her so she was again lying on the bed. Only, this time, he joined her, stretching out alongside her, her body slightly tucked beneath his.
His head seemed to move in too slowly, as he closed the distance between them. Until, finally, his lips connected once again with hers.
Chapter 17
Gabe knew he should stop. Hell, he knew he should never have joined her in bed to begin with. But knowing and doing were two different things. And to walk away now would surely slay him.
He became lost in her lush lips as they tenderly pulled at his. When her tongue sweetly swept across his, he thought he had died. Except, he knew he’d never qualify for heaven, and this definitely felt like heaven, so he must still be alive.
Well past the point where he could halt without severe pain in the vicinity of his erection, he decided to show her pleasure beyond anything she had ever dreamed of.
His lips fully on hers, he slid his hand over her hip, exploring its roundness through the soft linen. Once he reached the back of her thigh, he bunched the fabric of her shift, inch by titillating inch. When he encountered the hem and his fingers brushed her bare skin, he groaned into her mouth. She was so warm. Heat washed through him, starting from the very fingertips creating circles on her soft skin.
Keeping her engaged by increasing the pressure of his lips, he slipped his hand beneath the thin material and was greeted by her soft gasp melting into his mouth. He couldn’t tell if it was in response to his deepened kiss or the hand he had splayed across her bottom. Either way, he would revel in it.
He lifted his head and felt a deep emptiness at the loss of her lips. He quickly rectified it by swirling his tongue over her delicate neck, inhaling her light womanly scent, enhanced by a hint of lilac. One goal in mind, he continued downward, anointing her blushing skin with his lips. He gave her buttock a gentle squeeze before he moved his hand and opened her shift to his roaming mouth.
The sight of Elizabeth’s ripe breasts, crowned with hardened nipples, stole his breath and tightened his cock to the point of throbbing. Awareness that he would have no release tonight made his arousal tilt toward agony rather than pleasure. However, no matter what his body craved, this was for her satisfaction only. That wasn’t to say he wouldn’t find immense pleasure in coaxing her to her first climax.
By the time he closed his lips over one tight peak, her breathing had turned into deep gasps, interspersed with breathless moans. Each sound heightened his passion, making it almost impossible for him to focus only on her. He fought to keep from moving her hand to his aching cock.
He bit gently at her nipple, then soothed it with a flick of his tongue. She rewarded his deed by twining her fingers into the hair at the back of his head, pulling him tighter against her breast, her eagerness more than he had ever dreamed of.
Lost in the intensity swirling through him, still he kept his head and devoted himself to arousing her body with wicked nibbles and light licks of his tongue. When she began arching to meet his lips, he gave her other breast the same attention.
“Oh, God, Gabe,” she moaned. “What are you doing to me?”
He chuckled against her soft flesh, then skimmed his fingers over her tight stomach. The further he traveled, the faster her breaths came—and the harder his erection strained against his breeches. When his fingers finally connected with her silky curls, he wasn’t sure if it was her gasp or his that escaped into the room.
“Easy. Simply relax and feel,” he murmured as her muscles tightened under the palm of his hand. “I promise this will be better than you ever imagined.”
Her heated center a slip of his hand away, his fingers itched to bury themselves there. But until he was sure of her readiness for such a sensual onslaught, he held himself in agony.
“Look at me, Minx.” Her eyes met his and excitement ripped through him at the unmistakable desire pooling in the depths of her deep green gaze. “This is the last time I’m going to ask. Are you sure you want me to continue?” One hand propped on the mattress, holding the brunt of his weight from her, Gabe stilled, waiting for her answer.
Her next words had the power to propel him into heavenly bliss or drop him straight to hell. No matter her answer, he would abide by her decision. Perhaps he should have asked before he’d stoked her desire. A true gentleman would have had her final consent before touching her. But he’d never qualified as a gentleman.
The feel of her lush body beneath hi
s felt too good for him to suffer much guilt.
“I want more. Please, Gabe.” Her answer came in a whisper but he heard it all the way to what remained of his soul.
He flashed her a wide smile. “I was hoping you’d say that.”
Reassured, Gabe parted her damp folds. Bloody Hell. Just the feel of her against his fingers almost pushed him over the edge. He’d never come this close to losing control, not even as a callow youth.
He fought for self-discipline as he caressed her, playing her as if each touch held the next perfect note in a symphony. Never before had he been so intent on a woman’s pleasure. He had always believed himself a generous lover, but if he were honest his past encounters had never been about his partner. The only goal had ultimately been his own satisfaction. Now it was different. With Elizabeth he’d be pleased simply giving to her, not asking for anything in return.
To help her reach her pinnacle, he claimed her lips, the deep thrust of his tongue mimicking the movement of his fingers.
Her breath came in short bursts against his mouth.
As he eased the pressure on her lips, she moaned, “Gabe. Oh, Gabe. Please, I can’t . . .”
“Yes, you can, sweetheart. Just let go.” Sensing she was close to her release, he swirled his thumb over the hidden nub.
“What . . . Oh . . . Gabe.”
He covered her mouth with his, muffling the sound of her climax with his kiss, until she quieted. Once her body stilled and her tremors waned, he rolled to his side, drawing her close, and pulled the blanket over her.
Desire still resonated from his body but for some reason he felt content to merely hold her. At the moment he refused to examine it further.
Her silence, on the other hand, worried him.
“Elizabeth, sweet, are you all right?” The husky undertone of his voice surprised him. It seemed witnessing her release had a greater effect on him than he’d realized.
Her only response was to burrow closer to his side, nuzzling his chest. Followed by a light moan. He chuckled. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
The thought of her unguarded response had him fisting his hands so he wouldn’t reach for the buttons of his breeches.
Then she emitted a dainty snore, breaking the silence of the room. The pleasure he’d given had exhausted her.
Never had a snore sounded so provocative. He wanted to wake her and explore her body again. Most of all, he simply wanted to be with her. Which scared the hell out of him. If things could be different . . .
But he remained the murderous son of a black-hearted scoundrel. Because of that, he must never allow Elizabeth to know he held a deep affection for her.
He had to distance himself. Being in her presence only made things worse. Gabe slowly drew away from her warm body, but she tightened her hold on him. He had little choice but to wait until she settled.
Then he froze as she muttered, her warm breath heating him through his shirt, “I love you, Gabe.”
The room seemed to tilt, knocking him off balance. Somewhere deep inside he took great pleasure in her words. But a shred of sense acknowledged the misery such innocent words could bring.
Not for him, but for his Minx.
Careful not to wake her, he eased from her embrace and left the bed. His body tensed when she moved restlessly, afraid she would rouse and he’d have to face her, with her vow of love still echoing in his head. He could never respond in kind.
When she settled deeper into the pillows, he relaxed as much as his tight muscles would allow.
Standing alongside the bed, gazing at her, the memory of her soft announcement warmed Gabe’s heart. Images of the young girl who had followed in his shadow coaxed a smile from his lips. Thoughts of that innocent child were quickly replaced by visions of the incredible woman she’d become. A woman willing to sacrifice her Season to aid him. Any man would be blessed to have her affections—any man but him. The hopelessness of the situation destroyed his smile.
She deserved a man who would love her, be faithful to her, treat her with the respect she was worthy of. Not one who would someday break her heart with his infidelities and his inability to love her fully. Not a man like him.
And heaven forbid she ever learn the secret that had created such darkness inside him. If she knew he was responsible for someone’s death, she’d despise him.
Feeling the walls closing in on him, he grabbed his coat. On his way to the door, he turned and scanned her sleeping form. If only things could be different. If only he was capable of giving her what she needed, what she deserved. He shook his head in disgust. What the hell was he thinking? He could never be that man. Not with Wesbrook blood flowing through him. And not with the death of an innocent woman on his conscience.
In defeat, Gabe’s shoulders slumped, and locking the door behind him, he left the room.
And the temptation of all the things he would never have.
Chapter 18
A knock at the door roused Elizabeth from a sleep more relaxing than she could remember. So relaxing, her body seemed weightless. It wasn’t until she rolled over, and inhaled the scent of Gabe from the pillow, that she recalled the source. A smile slowly spread across her lips at the thought of the intimate moments that had played out the prior evening.
When she realized she was alone in the room, her smile vanished. Where had Gabe gone?
She sat up in the bed, pushing her unbound hair out of her face, as the door opened. Disappointment bit into her when Aunt Millie walked into the room.
“Good morning, child. How are you feeling this morning?” her aunt asked, crossing the room and taking a seat on the bed.
“I am well. Much improved from yesterday,” Elizabeth responded, hoping her aunt wouldn’t decipher the real reason behind her vast improvement. Never had a night of rest after an episode refreshed her so thoroughly.
“I’m glad to hear it.” Concern flickered in the older woman’s eyes. “I may be familiar with your burden, but I still worry about you, dear. And poor Gabe was beside himself.” Aunt Millie’s troubled expression quickly vanished; instead, she studied Elizabeth with a scrutiny that almost made her squirm. “How did he handle it? Did you explain everything?”
Elizabeth couldn’t be sure, but she suspected Aunt Millie was asking about more than sharing her secret with Gabe. “Yes, I told him about my fears.” Remembering Gabe’s understanding, Elizabeth smiled. “In truth, it was a relief to speak of it with someone other than you and Marcus, or a horde of doctors.”
“I’m glad you were able to unburden yourself to someone else.” Then Aunt Millie huffed, “If it weren’t for the ninnies of the ton, you would be able to speak freely of your episodes. Your affliction may not be common, but it is not unnatural.”
Elizabeth scooted toward her aunt and placed a hand on her arm. It was just like Millie to want to transform the world and fix what hurt her. Almost as if her mother were still alive. “Don’t fret, Aunt. Those who hold any importance to me know the truth, and nothing else matters.”
“You are far too forgiving, child.” Aunt Millie stood and retrieved the dress Gabe must have draped across the dressing table the night before. “Now, I’ve come to help you. Gabe has sent the servants ahead to ensure everything is ready for our arrival. If we are to reach Frenton Hall by nightfall, we need to be on our way. Gabe is downstairs with Phoebe awaiting breakfast.”
Elizabeth’s aunt placed the dress and underclothes on the foot of the bed, before she bent to retrieve an article from the floor. Elizabeth blushed when she realized it was her shift. Oh heavens, what her aunt must think. She might believe it reasonable for Gabe to remove some of Elizabeth’s clothing, but the circumstances hadn’t warranted him removing everything.
Aunt Millie set the shift next to the rest of the garments and, much to Elizabeth’s relief, never commente
d on it. “Now, don’t dawdle, child. There is much to do before we depart.”
Anxious to avoid giving her aunt time to assess the situation and her nakedness, Elizabeth promptly vacated the bed and with Aunt Millie’s assistance, donned her clothing.
As her fingers smoothed out any remaining wrinkles in her dress, the feel of Gabe’s fingers running over her body returned to her. She wished her aunt wasn’t present, so she could dally and thus recall every touch, every sound, every kiss. Now was not the time to reminisce about such things.
Perching on the only chair in the room, Elizabeth pulled on her half-boots and allowed herself a smile.
Soon she would see Gabe, and being with him was better than sitting with a bunch of memories.
Her boots on and laced, Elizabeth placed a hand on her mussed hair and turned to her aunt. “Do you think you could manage a simple coiffure?”
“Child, if we had time, I could manage the most intricate of styles.” She moved to stand behind Elizabeth and swiftly began to arrange her hair.
Aunt Millie completed the task easily and Elizabeth admired her aunt’s skill. The style was subtly elegant, and all with only a few pins. The woman never ceased to amaze her.
Elizabeth turned to her aunt with a smile. “Shall we join Phoebe and Gabe?”
“We had better, dear. If we hurry there might be a roll or two left, and maybe a tad of marmalade to go along with it.” With that, her aunt herded Elizabeth toward the door.
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