I jolt up, my heart threatening to burst through my chest. “What? What happened? What did he say?”
“I didn’t see him. He left a note.”
“What did it say?”
“He said he knows I’m hiding you and that he isn’t going to give up trying to find you. He swears he only wants to apologize. The note was erratic, scribbled quickly with sentences marked out. From what I could make out, the stuff he tried to hide was threatening. I saw an or else and warning you in there. He’s got some issues. He really needs to be in a hospital or something.”
“Dammit. Should I go back? Should we set up a meeting? Maybe if he can talk to me he’ll move on.”
“No fucking way. Do not come back here. He doesn’t want to apologize, Nova. I’m not sure what he’ll do, but nothing good.”
“I don’t want him bothering you. Maybe you should come stay with me for a while.”
“You know I can’t,” she says on a sigh. “I have to work. But I have Greg. He’ll stay with me.”
“Y’all together again?”
Her and Greg have been off and on for a few years, usually breaking up over stupid stuff, but they really love each other.
“For now,” she says with a short laugh. “Be careful, though. I don’t think Mario knows where you are, but you can never be too careful.”
“I need you to be careful! I can’t believe he left you a note.”
“I’m gonna have a camera installed soon, so that’ll put me a little more at ease. And I told the cops about this letter.”
“Okay, good.”
“How’s everything? You all right?”
“Yeah, everything’s fine.” I hear her say something to someone else. “Are you busy?”
“Taking a break at lunch, but I gotta get back. I’ll call you tonight and you better answer.”
I laugh. “Yeah, yeah. Get to work. Love you.”
“Love you more.”
Once we get off the phone, I lie back down and think of all the ways Mario could find me, but I don’t come up with any. There shouldn’t be a way for him to track me down out here. I don’t even use my social media anymore. I mean, I get on Twitter from time to time, but I never tweet, I just read all the drama and news articles and whatever’s trending. I should be fine, but I worry about my sister.
I live with a ton of guilt for bringing him into our lives. I thought he was a good guy, but he really had me fooled.
I scroll through the other messages that came through when I was asleep and find one from Ayanna telling me there’s another party tonight. She says I owe her a better night since I dipped out on them last night. I can’t really argue with that, because I do feel bad for leaving the way I did, but I can’t turn down time with Elijah.
God, Elijah.
Memories from last night make me blush. I can’t believe what I did in the passenger seat of his car! No doubt the alcohol in my system ignited my courage, but Elijah fanned the flames. His filthy mouth, sexy voice, and sinful gaze on my body. He turned me on without even touching me, and then licked the arousal from my fingers when I was done. Good lord, I’m getting tingly just thinking about it.
We definitely crossed a line and I’m sure he’s beating himself over it this very second, but it’s not like we slept together. Besides my fingers in his mouth for a brief second, we didn’t come into contact. We can still deny anything going on between us.
But God do I want more to go on between us!
However, if I know anything about Elijah, it’s that he’s coming up with a plan to push me away. He’ll hold me after class on Monday and tell me it was a mistake. He’ll say we can’t be alone together anymore. I wouldn’t be surprised if he wanted me to transfer classes.
With a huff, I shove the covers down and climb out of bed. I text Ayanna that I’ll meet up with her later tonight, then I jump in the shower and plan my day. I have grocery shopping to do, and maybe I’ll take some time to explore this little town.
23
“A student?” Barbara repeats. “In your class?”
I give her a single nod.
“Oh.”
She’s quiet for a little while, staring at the grass with concern written on her face. I wait for her to tell me all the things I already know.
You can’t pursue that.
It’s wrong.
It’s against the school’s rules.
She’s much younger than you.
“School policy doesn’t allow those types of relationships, I’m sure.”
“Correct.”
“You like her?”
I sigh and rub my hand over my face. “We met before school started. Had a good time.” I spare her the details, but I’m sure she can figure it out.
“I see.”
“I don’t know what to do. Well, that’s a lie, I do know what to do.”
“You know what the school wants you to do,” she amends. “You want something different.”
“I struggle with the age thing a little bit, but far less than I thought. I’m more concerned about her being my student. If we attempted anything, it would have to be a secret. From everybody. For a long time. Once again, I wouldn’t be able to offer a woman what she deserves. We can’t go out to dinner or the movies. We can’t be out in public together. Why would I do that to her?”
“For a chance at love?”
I furrow my brow, then give her a slight grin. “That’s a bit much right now.”
“Well, you’ll never know love if you don’t give it a chance. It might start as something fun and adventurous, but who knows what it’ll turn into?”
“She deserves more.”
“Have you asked her what she wants?”
“She says she’s okay with keeping it secret. She promises not to tell anyone.”
“I understand the conflict, I do. Your career is important, and I wouldn’t want you to lose that, but I also want you to be happy. This young lady seems to know what she wants. Keep it a secret. Meet up off campus, have dates in your home and see how you feel. Maybe you’ll decide it isn’t worth it. But maybe you’ll find what you never thought you’d have.”
“We may not be compatible for a long-term relationship.”
She shrugs. “Maybe, maybe not. How will you know?”
“Our age difference might be a huge factor.”
“But maybe not.”
“What if—”
Barbara puts her hand on my shoulder, stopping me. “Quit looking for excuses to not try. Not every relationship has the perfect beginning. Me and my husband have quite the story. We were young and fell in love over the course of a summer. Didn’t even live in the same area. He disappeared, I dated someone else, then when he came back, I dropped everything to be with him again. Midge tells me London was in a relationship when she met Royce. And Cillian and Midge lied to everyone about what they were up to for a while,” she says, playfully rolling her eyes. “Sometimes people find the love of their life in unusual circumstances. Don’t worry about it. You’re not the first professor to be with a student and you won’t be the last. At least she’s an adult.”
“Midge is lucky to have you,” I tell her with a smile. “I appreciate you listening and trying to help me out.”
Her eyes glisten. “You can call on me anytime, okay?”
We stand up and embrace. “Thank you, Barbara. For everything.”
“You got it. Now think it over. I won’t mention this conversation to anyone. Don’t worry.”
* * *
I spend the rest of my Saturday thinking over everything Barbara told me, and weighing the pros and cons of attempting anything with Nova while she’s still a student. My head and heart are warring, and I don’t know which will win. When I’m away from her, I think I can hold steadfast in my decision to keep it strictly professional, but the second I’m around her, my resolve crumbles, and I’m ready to risk everything for a single kiss.
For now, I focus on making dinner for Royce, Cillian, Midge, an
d London. Forty-five minutes before anyone is due to arrive, a knock on the door gets my attention. Before I can take two steps out of the kitchen, I hear it open, followed by Royce’s voice.
“It’s me. I’m early, I know.”
I sit back on the stool at the island in my kitchen and wait for him to walk in. “What’s up? Is London not coming?”
“She’ll be here. I just wanted to talk to you.”
I put the newspaper down and tilt my head. “You okay?”
He waves his hand through the air. “Yeah, yeah. I’m good. How are things with you?”
“Fine,” I answer slowly, curious as to where this is going.
“Yeah? Nothing new?”
I narrow my eyes at him. “What? What do you want to say?”
Royce chuckles as he walks around to the other side of the island and rests on his elbows. “Well, I’m not sure. I don’t know what you know.”
I bring the paper back up, putting a barrier between us. “If you’re gonna talk in riddles, I don’t have time.”
“I’m not talking in riddles,” he says, his hand coming down on the paper, crumpling it. “How’d things go with that chick from the bar?”
I try to keep my eyes from bulging out of my head. Why would he be asking about that?
“It was fine. Typical.”
“Mm.” His green eyes sparkle with mischief.
“What?” I question, annoyed.
“You haven’t talked to her since that night then?”
“Why do you care?”
“I’m just curious.”
“Well, stop.”
Royce laughs and grabs a bottle of water out of the fridge before settling on another barstool, leaving one between us. “I’m pretty sure I saw her recently.”
My heart races. “Oh? Well, small town.” I try to straighten out the paper to give me something to do.
“Yeah, she was with a few other people.” Pause. “One was wearing a University of Gaspar shirt.”
I meet his eyes. “And?”
Royce throws his arms in the air. “Why are you so difficult? Is she a student or not?”
“You think I know all the students at the university?”
Royce rolls his eyes, and I don’t even know why I’m trying to keep this from him any longer. It’s clear he knows she’s a student, and while that doesn’t necessarily mean she has to be in my class, I might as well tell him the truth.
I fold the paper and push it away, then take a breath. “Yes, she’s a student.”
His eyes nearly double in size. “Are you serious?”
“Yes.”
“And you’re not freaking out?”
“Who said that? I’ve been freaking out since she walked into my class.”
Royce jumps off the stool. “What?” He runs his hands through his hair, looking more shocked than me when I found out. “She’s in your class? Your fucking class?”
I can’t help but chuckle at his theatrics. “Yeah, she is.”
“Oh my fucking God, I can’t believe it.”
“Yeah, well.”
“I need so many details right now. Oh man, I’m glad I came over early. Can we call Cill? Please? We need to talk about this.”
I shrug, might as well get this over with all at once. “Fine. Call him.”
It only takes Cill fifteen minutes to get here, and once he is, we all sit in the den with a drink in hand, and I start talking.
I tell them how things ended between Nova and I that night we slept together. Meaning, no personal info exchanged, no plans to meet up again—just a simple one-night stand. Then I go over how it felt to watch her walk into my class on Monday morning. I talk about the flirting, the tutoring, the kiss in my office, and briefly gloss over the incident in my car without giving too many details. I just tell them the things we talked about without mentioning what she was doing.
Their eyes stay wide the whole time. I can’t remember a time they’ve been this quiet. Especially together.
“So, that’s about it,” I say.
“That’s just the beginning! What?” Cill exclaims, looking at Royce. “You gotta tell us your plan. Like, what happens now?”
I take a sip of my drink and shake my head. “I don’t know. She’s still a student.”
“But you like her, right? And she’s into you?”
“We’d have to be secretive. No dates, no being out in public. It’s not ideal.”
Cill scoffs. “It would still be more than what you’ve had these past several years. Tell her to come here. Nobody from the school is watching your house. Go out of town. We live within driving distance of a lot of different cities and towns.”
“You could go to the lake house,” Royce offers, then looks to Cill. “You could ask Midge when it’s free, right?” Royce looks back at me. “You could take her up there.”
“I don’t know.”
They both make discouraged noises, and Cill says, “I think you should give it a shot. Fuck the rules. Try it out.”
“I agree,” Royce chimes in with a nod. “It’s not like we’re gonna be telling anybody. You’re our brother, and we only want the best for you. We’re not about to get you in trouble, but I think you should just see what happens.”
I’m saved by the doorbell ringing, announcing the arrival of Midge and London. “Y’all get the door, I’ll check the food. We’ll talk about this later.”
24
After my night with Elijah on Friday, I feel like the rest of the weekend drags on far too long. I went out with Ayanna on Saturday after running some errands, and we ran into Lorenzo, who doesn’t appear to be holding any grudges for how I left on Friday. If only they knew what really happened. A shiver runs up my spine just thinking about it.
I spent Sunday on the phone with my sister while I did some cleaning and hung up a few pictures I bought on Saturday. The walls are still mostly bare and the apartment feels very temporary, but I’ll slowly give it some TLC and make it homey.
I brace myself for Elijah’s cold shoulder when I walk into his class a few minutes early, because I’m sure he’s about to lecture me on what we can and cannot do. But I’m still holding on to a little bit of hope.
When I enter the room, he has his back to me, hunched over the side of his desk. I let my eyes peruse his body, enjoying the view, but as soon as he hears my steps, he looks over his shoulder.
“Morning,” I greet.
Standing up straight and turning to watch me walk in, he offers me the smallest smile. “Good morning, Nova.”
I get to my desk and sit down, then rest my face in my palm as I continue to watch him. “How was your weekend?”
Elijah walks to the front of his desk and leans against the front of it, crossing one foot over the other. “It was quite eventful, actually. Yours?”
“Same.”
We continue to stare at each other, stuck in a game of who’s going to turn away first. The fact that he’s holding eye contact with me is a good sign.
“Do you think we should talk about Friday night?” he asks.
Here we go.
“Only if you have something positive to say.”
He smirks and my heart skips a beat. “I’m not free to tutor you this week,” he says, making my head spin with the rapid change of direction.
“Oh. Okay.”
He turns away from me and walks to the board. “I’m only available on Saturday.” I keep my lips together, unsure about where this is going. He barely glances over his shoulder when he says, “You can come to my house. Seven o’clock?”
Heat spreads through my veins as my heart bangs against my ribs. I try to say, “Y-yeah, “ but my voice is barely a whisper, and I find that I’m only nodding. He’s robbed me of my ability to speak.
Elijah spins around to get a good look at me, his right eyebrow going up in question. “Okay, yes,” I finally say. “I’ll be there.”
He grins then turns around just as students march in.
At the end
of class, we have a few minutes of free time before we’re able to leave, and Lorenzo reaches over and taps me on my arm as I’m trying to casually steal glances at our professor.
“Hey, do you have plans this weekend?” he asks. “Because I was thinking we could go out.”
Elijah lifts his head from his desk, because he’s close enough to hear our conversation. Our eyes meet for half a second before he goes back to what he was doing.
I turn to face Lorenzo who’s watching me with a grin. “Go out where? When?” I ask.
“Saturday? We can go grab something to eat, maybe watch a movie. What do you think?”
Oh, a date. Not a group thing. Not a party. He wants to take me out. I fight the urge to look in Elijah’s direction.
“I actually do have plans on Saturday,” I say with a slight tilt of my head as I give him a frown. “Sorry.”
He smiles. “It’s okay. Put me in for next weekend, yeah?”
I grin, because you can’t help but do that when you look at Lorenzo. But I feel awful because I think he wants to be more than friends, and honestly, if it weren’t for how I feel about Elijah, I’d probably give him a chance.
I skate out of giving him a verbal response when Elijah dismisses us.
“Bye, Professor Kingston,” I say as I walk past his desk, staring into his piercing gaze.
He furrows his brow slightly, his lips lifting on one side in not so much a grin, but in non-amusement. I swallow my laugh.
“Bye, Miss Rivera,” he replies.
I shoot him a look over my shoulder, because I much prefer hearing Nova come out of his mouth than Miss Rivera, but I suspect he knows that.
I can’t wipe the smile off my face for the rest of the day.
25
At five o’clock on Friday, right as I’m leaving the school, my phone rings.
“Hello?”
“Hey,” Merrick’s voice says from the other end.
“Hey, man. What’s going on?”
“Not much.” He laughs. “Well, that’s a lie. Everything is going on.”
“Yeah? You guys start recording your next album?”
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