by Nicki Rae
“Ok, well, I’m going to go talk to Logan. I will be right back,” I say to Shay.
“Ok. Em?” I turn back to look at her.
“Yeah?”
“Please, be careful. You are both my friends and I don’t want either of you to hurt anymore.”
I smile at her, “I don’t think you will have to worry about that anymore.”
She looks at me skeptically, “What are you thinking, Emily Jenkins?”
“You’ll see.” I say and walk down the hall.
As I approach Charles’ room, I see Tyler and Logan sitting next to his bed. I watch them and they are talking to him, I know they said that he is showing signs of improvement but he looks the same to me. Still lying there, looking lifeless and hooked up to a bunch of machines. Tyler looks up and notices me, he half smiles. I see him say something to Logan and then Logan looks right at me through the window. He closes his eyes and I can see tears flowing down his cheeks; my heart aches for him. I know that his tears are probably for his father but I can’t help but think that they are also somewhat for me.
Tyler gets up and walks out to the hallway.
“Hey Tyler, how is your dad?” I say confused as to why Logan didn’t come out to talk to me.
Tyler hugs me, “He still fucking looks the same but the doctors keep telling us he is improving.”
“That’s great news, though!”
He shakes his head, “Yeah, it will be better though when he wakes up and talks to us.”
“Yes, I know.”
“Tyler, do I want to know why Logan didn’t come out here?”
Tyler shakes his head, “I’m sorry, Em. He is going through some tough shit right now. He will come around.”
“Don’t bullshit with me Tyler, should I go back home?”
“That is up to you, Em. But staying here will help him more, even if he gives you the cold shoulder for a while.”
“Ok.” I say, somewhat defeated.
I look back in the room and Logan is staring at me. I muster the most convincing smile I can and wave. He just looks back to his dad.
“I’m going back in now, Em, thanks for coming.”
He one-arm hugs me and goes back in the room. I stand there watching for a few minutes. Logan doesn’t say a word to Tyler as he takes his seat next to his dad, again.
I walk back to Dee’s room. She is back and Shay is in with her. They both look at me and I walk in the room.
“How are my boys, Emily?” Dee says to me.
“As you would expect them to be.” I say.
“Are you getting released soon?”
“Yes, if you want to call it being released. I will just be in Charles room, until he wakes up. Did the boys say he is waking or anything yet?” I shake my head.
“No. Physically he still looks the same. But if the doctors say he is improving, we should think positive.”
She smiles at me, “Thanks, Emily. You are right. You are such a ray of sunshine, Logan is extremely lucky to have you.”
I just smile because I don’t feel like a ray of sunshine, I feel like an asshole.
“Thanks, Dee. Anything you need? Can I get you anything from your house?”
She thinks a minute.
“Actually, yes. I need my shower supplies. The boys brought me clothes but forgot those items.”
“Sure, I can get those for you.”
“Ok, I have a travel bag under my sink, which has everything I need in it. And thanks again, Emily, for everything.”
She looks right in my eyes and I can’t help but think she is talking about something else.
As I walk into the Moore house, I see a table laden with shot glasses, an empty bottle of Jack and a deck of cards. I am going to have to clean this up; I don’t want this mess left here while everyone is in the hospital. I take a trip to the kitchen to put away the shot glasses and find it a disaster. I quickly text Shay to let her know that I may be a little longer because I have to clean up after these messy boys.
I finish with the kitchen and head upstairs to get the things I was looking for. I grab Dee’s shower bag. I start to walk back down the hall but stop when I am in front of Logan’s room. I look behind me to make sure no one is watching, even though I know I am alone in the house. Once I am satisfied that I am, indeed, by myself, I open Logan’s door. When I step in, I am flooded with memories, good and bad.
I walk over and sit down on his bed. It smells like him, his cologne and his manly smell, which I love. I missed him so much while he was gone. I hope all of this with his parents is over soon. I hate to see him hurting. I also hate knowing that I am some of the reason for his pain. I start to get up but my elbow hits his pillow and knocks in on the floor. I go to pick it up and notice that he has a picture of me on his nightstand. I don’t remember seeing this picture when I was here the other day. But I wasn’t really paying attention to the scenery, either. My cheeks flush as I remember being up against the wall, wrapped around Logan.
As my mind comes back from the gutter, I try to remember where the picture was taken. It must have been taken over fall break from school; that’s when Shay and I went over to Chicago. This has me puzzled; I will have to remember to ask Logan about this.
I stand up to leave and in the corner of his room, I notice the blanket that we always use when we have a picnic, in our spot. I walk over and pick it up. I know I shouldn’t but I need this, so I take the blanket with me. I walk down the steps and leave.
I call Shayla on the way back to the hospital, “Hello?” she answers.
“Hey, Shay, I’m headed back but I need to ask you something before I get there.”
“Ok?” she questions.
“You remember when we took that trip to Chicago over Fall Break last year?”
“Yes, girl we had a great time! Why?”
“Have you given any pictures of that trip to anyone?”
“Just your mom, why?”
“Well, I don’t know but I found one of me in Logan’s room.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I am going to ask him about it, when I see him.”
“Ok, well they are running some tests on Charles, so Tyler and I are waiting on you to go get some lunch.”
“Logan isn’t going?”
“I’m sorry, Em. He said he had some place to be and that he would be back later.”
I clear the lump I have in my throat.
“Ok, see you in a few.”
This is what I wanted, why is it affecting me like this?
I get to the hospital and take Dee’s hospital bag in to give to her.
“Thanks, Emily.” She says to me, again.
“You’re welcome, Mrs. Moore. Are you ready to take a shower? I can help you.”
“No dear, the nurse is going to help me. You guys go, I will be fine.”
We all look at each other and Tyler says, “Ok” as he hugs his mother.
*Logan*
As I head to Muncie, I feel out of control. I can’t handle this shit anymore and I am getting to the bottom of this, today. My dad is going to be ok, they tell me, but I will believe it when he opens his eyes. All I know is I need to know if Emily is with this Justin fucker. It is the only explanation for her being the way she is.
One minute we are ok and the next, she is telling Shay she is just hanging around until my folks are better. I know that’s what we agreed to but after everything that has happened; I thought that we were starting to get back on track. So, here I am, again, driving on this damn road that seems never ending. I want to be the one to make her smile again. She is so beautiful when she smiles. She is so carefree and fun. That’s my Emily. I haven’t seen her in a long time. It’s my fault she isn’t around anymore and I am going to fix that.
I finally make it to this deli where Emily works. I hope this douche is in here. I walk in and take my sunglasses off and see Justin standing there talking to some chick. I walk up to the counter; only the girl looks at me, this dude is still trying to
get in her panties. I clear my throat and he finally looks up. I see the surprise in his face when he sees me.
“Can I talk to you, man?”
“I’m working.”
I laugh.
“Yeah, working real hard to get in her panties.” I say and I nod my head in blondie’s direction.
He looks pissed now, good.
“Let’s go,” he says as he takes off outside.
I look back at the girl and wink at her. Her face turns to a look of pure disgust and I laugh.
I walk out the front door and dude looks like he is ready to fight.
“What the fuck, man?”
“Are you and Emily dating?”
He gets a cocky smile on his face.
”What did she tell you?”
“That doesn’t matter; I want you to tell me”
“You really messed that girls head up, you know?”
“I don’t need to you to tell me what I did, just answer the question.”
“You know she drinks a lot?”
How does he know how much she drinks? She said that they only worked together.
“How do you know that?” I ask him.
“I have been there more times than she even knows about to pick her up, when she was down. ME! Not you. And yet, you are the one that she is still hung up on.”
I take a few minutes to understand what he just said.
“What do you mean more times than she even knows?”
A maniacal smile spreads across his face and I momentarily break out with goose bumps. If I didn’t know any better, I would think he was going to slit my throat right here. Emily needs to stay away from this guy.
“I will let you figure that out on your own. Someone knows though, you could ask her.”
“Why don’t you just tell me? You are right in front of me.”
He laughs and says, “No, you don’t deserve any handouts. You need to work to figure out what Emily and I have.”
I see red, who does this fucker think he is. I grab him by the throat and slam him against the wall of the deli.
“You stay the fuck away from Emily!”
He puts up his hands in defeat like the pussy that he is. I let him go because I don’t want to get arrested. I walk back to my car and start to get in and before I do I look at him one more time and he just gives me a two finger salute with a cocky ass grin on his face and it takes everything I have not to rip this guy’s throat out. I get in my car and start driving back home.
As I am driving back towards the hospital, my phone rings. I look at the ID; it’s Emily. That means he called her. Good, I want her mind racing for a while. I just put my phone back down and then think better of it. The last time I didn’t answer my phone was a disaster.
I call Tyler, “Hello?” he says after a couple of rings.
“Hey, is Emily still with you?”
“Yes, do you want to talk to her?”
“No, just make sure she knows I’m ok.”
“Um, ok. Are you sure you’re ok, bro?” I hear the skepticism in his voice.
“Yes, I am a lot better. I will be back in a couple hours.
I hang up without another word. I don’t want him to question me anymore about what I am doing.
Chapter 19
*Emily*
“Was that him?” I ask Tyler.
“Yes,” he says.
“Well? What’s he doing?” I say exasperated.
I know Tyler is being played as the go between and it pisses me off that Logan didn’t just call me.
When Justin called me, he said he came in and made a big scene, I can’t believe it. He is going to get me fired, if I’m not already.
“He said to make sure you know that he is ok.”
“Why couldn’t he just tell me that?”
Tyler shakes his head and closes his eyes at the same time, “I don’t know, but you guys need to get your shit together. I’m tired of this.”
He gets up from the table and walks outside. I look over at Shay who is being uncharacteristically quiet.
“I’m sorry.” I say.
“He’s right, you two do need to get your shit together.”
She also gets up and walks out of the restaurant. I try calling Logan again. And, again, it goes to voicemail. I am going to murder him when he gets back. Does he not know that this entire mess is his fault? I instantly feel bad for saying that, but to a degree, it is.
I get up to walk outside with Tyler and Shay. We get in the car and I tell Tyler to drop me off at moms. I’m sure the next time I see Logan, it won’t be pretty and I don’t want that happening at the hospital.
“Are you sure that’s what you want?” Tyler asks me as he looks at me in the rearview mirror.
“Yes, thank you.”
He just nods and we take off. After Tyler drops me off, I walk in the house and my mom is sitting on the couch watching TV.
She looks at me surprised, “What’s going on sweetie?”
“I don’t know, but I am over this shit with Logan.”
She smiles at me and if I’m not mistaken, I think she may know something that I don’t.
“Is there something that I’m missing?” I ask her.
She pushes her lips out, looks back at the TV and says, “Nope”
“I don’t believe you. What’s up, mom?”
She just shakes her head and continues watching TV, not saying a word. I turn and walk up to my room. I lay down on my bed and text Shay.
Me: Something is up with my mom. She knows something and won’t tell me.
Shay: Knows something about what?
Me: I think Logan.
Shay: Oh…
Me: Really? You know, too?
Shay: I know nothing. ;)
What the fuck is going on? I immediately text Logan.
Me: I know you’re driving, so I know you won’t answer but you had better tell me what is going on soon. I’m going crazy!
Almost as soon as I hit send, my phone starts ringing; it’s Logan.
“Logan what the hell?” I answer and I hear him laugh.
“Well hello to you, too, babe.”
“You think this is funny?”
“No, actually, I don’t. I just called to tell you to have your ass ready in 10 minutes. I will be there to pick you up.”
“Logan…”
He interrupts me, “Just be ready.” He says and hangs up.
I blow my hair out of my face and try to reel myself in. I get up and go downstairs to wait for him. I sit next to my mom on the couch. She looks over at me.
“What do you want to watch?”
“Apparently, I’m not watching anything; Logan is on his way,” she smirks a little.
“Oh, ok.” I just shake my head.
Ten minutes later, Logan walks in the front door. He kisses my mom on the cheek and takes my arms, and helps me up from the couch; I’m not sure why he thought that was necessary. I smile at him, I haven’t seen him since earlier, and I have been both worried and pissed at him all day. I feel a sense of calm now that he is here even though it probably is not going to be fun. I turn to Mom and say, “I will be back later.” She just nods her head and smiles.
As we are walking out to the car, Logan grabs my hand and kisses it.
“Are we going back to the hospital?” I ask.
He shakes his head, “No. I have something else planned for us.”
“But what about your parents, Logan?” I ask.
“I called Mom on the way back. She said that there has been no change with dad. So, I asked if she would mind is we were MIA for a few hours. She said do what we need to do.”
“And, what do we need to do?”
“You’ll see.”
I think momentarily about asking him about Justin but for some reason it just seems inconsequential at the moment.
We start to drive and I am expecting to be heading toward his house and “our spot” but we are not driving the right way.
Con
fused I ask, “Where are we going Logan?”
He just smiles, that sexy, make my mouth water smile. I instantly know he is up to something.
Two can play at this game.
Before Logan got to the house, I had changed into shorts, a tank top, and flip flops. I reach into my purse and pull out a bottle of lotion. I put my leg up on the dash board and start messaging lotion into them, slowly. I see him briefly look and then his eyes are back at the road. I rub the lotion up my thigh, farther than necessary, really. I put my other leg and do the same and I’m pretty sure I hear a growl out of him.
“You ok, babe?” I say sweetly; he smirks.
“Just fine, thanks”
“Ok, good” I say and put my hand on his thigh.
I rub his leg a little, my hand getting a little higher and higher. He puts his hand on mine, stopping me from continuing. Ok, what now? I take my hand from his thigh and as I start to move it up to my hair, I rub my chest up to my neck, seductively. I close my eyes and moan.
“Mmm.”
I see a smirk creep up on Logan’s face. He just puts his sunglasses on. What the hell? I quickly put my hair up and look out the window, somewhat pouting. Except for the occasional glance at one another, we are silent the rest of the trip, which is absolutely disappointing; I was trying so hard. I was hoping for some type of fun on this trip.
We arrive downtown Indianapolis to the most beautiful hotel I have ever seen. The glass building is blue and absolutely gorgeous. Logan pulls in the parking garage and cuts the engine.
I look over at him, “What are we doing here, Logan?”
He shifts in his seat so he is facing me, “I want you to go in and sit at the bar, wait for me there. I will be in, in a few minutes.”
I am in utter shock and Logan knows it, he picks up my hand and kisses it.
“Please, just trust me. Don’t talk to anyone. Just wait for me.”
Still a little weary, I just look at him, “Please?” he pleads.
“Ok,” I say.
I grab my purse and start to get out of the car but Logan stops me, I turn to look at him and he says, “You look beautiful, by the way,” and I feel myself flush.
This guy who I have loved and hated for the last two years of my life is still able to make me feel flushed and get butterflies in my stomach.
“Thank You.” is all I say.