She nodded slowly. “Well, you need to remember that I’m not going to change my plans or alter my schedule just because you worry. You always worry.” She fired up her vehicle and tossed him a smile. “Besides, I can take care of myself.”
His eyes grew stormy and his jaw tightened, but he kept his mouth shut.
She sighed. “If you’re thinking about the night your brother attacked me, then yeah, you’re right. I let him have my back and I’ll regret that for the rest of my life, but that wasn’t going to happen in a shop full of people. So stop.”
He sat back in his seat and stared out the windshield. “I realize that. It’s why I kept it to myself.”
Tremaine leaned over the seat, and quietly spoke into her ear. “Just remember, he held his tongue for you. He drove me nuts for a couple hours, but he’s not bitching now. Give him a break.”
She snorted. “Fine.”
“Oh,” Robert sat up, “I invited Christian and Delilah to dinner. With James heading this way, it’s probably best to tell him where he came from. It might help to keep him safe. I just hope he doesn’t question himself because of his father.”
Liz nodded. “I doubt he will. I mean he doesn’t seem to care who his parents are. He knows he has his Uncle Bobby.” She winked at Robert. “He has me, Old Lady Murdock still comes around, and Tremaine has been like an uncle to him. So really, the kid knows he’s loved.”
“I still think it’s weird he’s never once asked about his parents.” Robert shook his head. “How can he not be curious?”
Liz snorted. “Same way I don’t care about mine.” Her hands tightened on the wheel as she started for home. “Look, sometimes it’s better not knowing where you come from. I mean, what if my parents sold me? What if they threw me away? Seriously, maybe they didn’t want me. So why worry about faceless people I will never find in a million years?”
“Someone always wants you, Liz.” Tremaine squeezed her shoulders tight.
“Two of us. No matter what,” Robert promised.
“I’m still getting used to that,” Liz replied.
Chapter 22
Two hours later and Liz was still hiding out in her room. Tremaine was tempted to go up and talk Liz into joining them downstairs, but he was supposed to be helping with dinner.
Robert could cook, thanks to spending hours in the kitchen with Old Lady Murdock, learning countless techniques.
James had always called Robert queer, and Tremaine had watched Liz come to his defense countless times. She had always perched at the table, watching, but never asking to join.
“What is it, Trem?” Robert asked as he opened the oven for the cornbread.
Looking back at Robert, he shrugged. “Nothing.”
“Wondering if she’s avoiding us?” There was a sparkle in his blue eyes.
“I know she is. I even know why. She’s stressing over things she can’t control. She’s going over every possible thing that could go wrong.” Tremaine shook his head. “Think back, Robert. How long did it take her to trust you weren’t going to leave her behind all those years ago?”
Robert sighed. “Too long. So much wasted time. I wish I could go back and fix it all.”
“You can’t, and even if you could, between James, Emily, and your mother, she wouldn’t be any different. Keep in mind that she had a rough upbringing even before she got to your family. Your father improved her situation a hundred fold, but I sometimes wish I kept her as my own. Not that I would have had any idea how to deal with her. I honestly thought bringing her to Wilhelm was the best choice.” He dragged his fingers through his hair and sighed.
“Mom dealt with Liz, even if she never fully accepted her. Liz was never what she expected of a young lady. Emily was jealous from the second she stepped into our lives. James…,” Robert shuddered. “I should have been there for her. I could have taken her with me.”
Tremaine knocked Robert’s shoulder. “Don’t. A hundred things could have gone differently. You can’t change that. She doesn’t blame you. She blames herself. Neither of you are to blame.”
Robert looked up the stairs before swinging his gaze to Tremaine. “You know, maybe you should go up there. I’ve got dinner covered.”
“You sure?”
“Yeah. I am. I think maybe you need to lay all your cards on the table for her. She knows my heart belongs to her, but you haven’t had a chance to convince her.”
A smirk lifted Tremaine’s mouth “If I go up there, I’m not going to be able to keep my hands off of her.”
“I don’t expect you to.”
* * * *
Liz wished she could sit, and not doubt for ten minutes. Yeah, that was easier said than done. She trusted Tremaine and Robert both. She did, even if she still dealt with insecurities she had harbored since before she found herself in their lives.
“Don’t listen to them,” Old lady Murdock whispered as she brushed Liz’s long hair. They sat under the willow tree near the river. “Wilhelm won’t ever let Emily have her way. Kathryn will never convince her husband to throw you out.”
Liz stared at the rushing water, trying to believe Mrs. Murdock was right. “Emily is convinced I’m trying to steal her father’s love. Kathryn can’t stand me. I just try to stay away from them all.”
“Don’t shut Robert out. That boy is your friend.” The way she said friend sounded as if she meant something else. She felt heat in her face and a tingle somewhere she never wanted to think of after Sinclair.
A single tear fell down her face, and she wiped it away.
“No, child. Don’t be ashamed of your feelings. You have every right to break down. You just have to put yourself together afterwards.”
“How do you put yourself together when nothing you do is right?” She sighed, but held still, enjoying the brush smoothing through her tangled hair.
“You do it all the time, Elizandra. You don’t give yourself enough credit.” she told her sternly.
She didn’t feel stronger. She felt weak, broken, shattered most of the time. There was only one person she fully trusted, but Robert made it hard not to trust him with his gentle dusky blue eyes, his kind demeanor, and the way he always stood up for her. He was always there for her, always willing to talk.
“Don’t forget Tremaine. The man who gave you a new chance. One where you make your own destiny, even if it isn’t always easy.”
Another tear slid free and she wiped it away. Tremaine brought her here and left her. He came from time to time, brought her gifts, things she actually appreciated, as opposed to the fancy dresses, and pretty hair combs Kathryn tried to convince her to wear, to make her a proper girl.
“He’s not here,” Liz whispered.
“Oh, child, he is never far. He makes sure that you are cared for. He always will.”
“And you?” Liz whispered.
“I’m often pulled in other directions, but I will always watch after you. I’ll be there when you need me most. Now go on, before they wonder where you’ve wandered off too.”
Strong arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her into a hard body. Tremaine nuzzled behind her ear. “I love you, Liz.”
She tipped her head to the side, granting him access as his hands flattened on her belly. “I love you too, Trem. Hell, I feel guilty that I never said it sooner.”
He lightly caught her earlobe between his teeth. “Do you regret where we wound up?”
She moaned as his hand slipped under her shirt to squeeze her breast. “No, but don’t you wonder what we would have been like together?”
“Not anymore.” His lips pressed damp kisses down her throat before he spun her around and pressed her against the wall. “I have what I want, and this way we all get what we need. So what if it wasn’t where any of us envisioned? I feel like this is where we belong. Don’t you?”
“I do. I couldn’t choose between you two to save my own life. I feel whole for the first time I can remember. I think you were always my missing piece.” Her eyes squeeze
d shut and a single tear fell. “I never stopped to think about it all those years with Robert, but something was always missing.”
“Hey, don’t do that. Don’t second guess what came before. We’re here now.” He pulled her toward the bed and laid her down. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. “There were a lot of years that neither you nor I could have gone there without tainting this. For years, you were still a child in my eyes. You were always mine, but in a very different capacity, until after Robert. Even then, I knew he belonged in your life, I just wasn’t sure I did.”
Her fingers threaded through his hair as she brought his mouth to hers. The kiss was a desperate plea. When she finally looked up at him, she whispered, “You always belonged in my life. I never realize how much.”
He rested his elbows on the bed and framed her face with his hands as she stared into her eyes. “I’m not going anywhere, Liz. You have me. All of me. No matter what, doll.”
Her hands caressed down his chest to take the hem him of his shirt. She pulled it over his head and he sat up to let her. She placed a kiss over his heart, and whispered, “Then make love to me, Trem. I need to feel you skin to skin, just you and me, even if it’s only once.”
He pulled her shirt off and she raised up to take off her bra. His fingers trailed down her skin to unbutton her pants. He moved down her body, his eyes never leaving hers as he pulled her jeans with him.
Tremaine climbed off the bed to take his own pants off before crawling up her body. Liz wrapped her hand around the back of his neck and drew him down to her, winding her legs around his thighs to pull him against her.
Her eyes closed as he shifted, gliding home slowly. “Open your eyes, Liz.” The request sent a shiver down her spine.
She complied, her gaze locking on his as he found her end. “I need you, Trem.”
“You have me, you always have.” He took her mouth in a slow kiss, his tongue matching his pace as he made love to her in languid thrusts that ignited sparks of pleasure through her whole body.
Tremaine wiped the doubt away as he made love to her. He filled in the cracks and made her whole in a way she hadn’t known she could be.
She knew Robert was a part of them, but she needed this one time to believe Tremaine truly wanted the same.
He built her up slowly, until her back arched and the pleasure filled up and flowed over, sweeping through her. His release followed, and she held him tight.
Tremaine rolled to his side, pulling her with him. Liz snuggled in as close as she could.
“Thank you,” She whispered against his neck.
“For loving you?” He tipped her head back and peered into her eyes. “No thanks needed for that, just don’t ever forget it, doll.”
“I won’t.”
The doorbell rang, and she groaned. “I suppose we need to go down there.”
Liz rolled from the bed. She rushed into her clothes before she hurried down the stairs. Forcing a smile, she threw the door open
“Hi, come on in Chris, Del. Sorry I was off last night.” She glanced away. “I hate having you see me that way.”
Christian hugged her. “You were fine, Liz, and now you’re smiling so it doesn’t matter.”
Delilah gave her a hug and grinned. “Yeah, you’re glowing today.”
“Dinner’s ready,” Robert called from the entryway to the kitchen. The dining room was adjacent with big open windows that let in the light. Or the nice gray sky at that point.
There was a reason Liz liked Washington. She wasn’t much for bright sunny weather, and Seattle had a lot of grey gloomy skies. She could even draw from a storm, which mages weren’t supposed to be able to do. Then again, there were a lot of things she could do that she shouldn’t be able to.
“Good to see you, Christian,” Robert said as he pulled his nephew in for a big hug.
That was going to take some getting used to. She didn’t know how she had missed the family resemblance, or the timing.
“You too, Uncle Bobby.” Christian leaned back and grinned at Robert. “Does this mean you’ll be staying around?”
Robert’s gaze swung to Liz. “As much as possible. I have to work out a few details, but I won’t be leaving for any longer than I have to.”
Liz’s breath caught, but she reminded herself that he was still a Silver Council Enforcer which meant that he could be sent out at any time to anywhere. She missed their assignments together in a way, but she was glad to be done with the politics of the Council.
Tremaine draped his arm over her shoulder and pulled her close to murmur in her ear. “Relax. He is taking some time off for now. He may not even go back. He’s finally realized the Council has some serious issues.”
Jarvis, sure, she knew he was a problem. That bastard was as corrupt as they came. There were others as well, but she wasn’t even sure who was still a part of the Council.
Liz took her seat and held back the memories that wanted to rush to the forefront. She knew they had to tell Christian about his fucked up family. A part of her wished he could be hers and Robert’s, but things would have played out much differently and she didn’t want to travel down that road. Tremaine was right, she was happy where they ended up.
“How was your birthday?” Robert asked Christian, drawing Liz’s attention.
Christian grinned. “It was great. Thanks for coming. I never really expect you anywhere too public.”
“I had my reasons, but that’s all changed now.” Robert sat down beside her, and Tremaine took the seat on her other side.
Liz felt a little confined, but she breathed deep and forced her body to relax. She smiled sadly. “That was my fault. Your uncle was doing exactly as I asked.”
Tremaine gave both Liz and Robert a dirty look before turning to Christian. “Robert wants to explain about your parents. Unfortunately, it seems there are a few things you should know.”
Christian’s golden eyes lit up as he looked at her. “Are you and Robert my parents?”
She bit her lip and shook her head. “No, honey. I would never have let you go, no matter what. I didn’t know about your parents until last night, but that’s Robert’s place to tell you, not mine.”
His smile fell clean off his face as he let out a breath. “If it’s not you two, then why does it matter? They obviously didn’t want me. So why do I care twenty-one years later.”
“Sorry, kiddo.” Robert gave him a solemn look. “You’re ours in the only way that counts. You still need to know the story because your father would use you against Liz and me if he finds out who you are.”
“What?” Christian asked, confusion clouded his expression. “Why? If he never cared before, why would it matter?”
Liz took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a second. “I don’t believe he knows yet. He’s a horrible man, and I wish to God you never had to meet him, but if you do, you need to know. He’s done things so unforgiveable I can hardly believe you’re related.”
“And me?” Robert asked softly.
Her eyes shot to his, “You two are nothing alike.” And neither was his uncle but she couldn’t tell him that. Robert still didn’t know where she came from because she never once had the confidence in his faith in her to tell him.
He reached up, cupping her face. His thumb brushed across her cheek. “I’m not going anywhere, Liz. I already promised you forever.”
She nodded because she had no other words.
Robert turned back to Christian. “Let’s eat first and we can discuss the rest.”
Christian nodded. “Good, I’m hungry.”
* * * *
Tremaine watched as Liz stood from the table and took her plate to the sink. In fact, everyone watched as she went to the living room to stare outside at the storm that was brewing outside.
Christian softly said, “Why does she always feel guilty? Always, and she never does anything wrong.”
Tremaine pushed his fingers through his hair and met Christian’s gaze. “You’ll fi
nd out a little of it. She’s always had it rough. Even when things are going good for her, something tries to come in and wreck it.”
“No one is going to wreck it this time,” Robert insisted.
Tremaine turned to Robert. “No one. They’ll have to come through us, and no one is getting through us.”
Christian’s brow arched. “That doesn’t explain her guilt.”
Sighing, Tremaine shook his head. “Maybe you should ask her. I still haven’t figured out why she does that. Just don’t expect a real answer.” He got up and took his plate to the sink before moving to the living room.
Liz stood against the window frame, her eyes locked on the dark clouds swirling closer.
Tremaine closed the distance and put his arms around her, drawing her into the line of his body. “Talk to me, Liz.”
“We’ll be doing plenty of that.” It came out quiet and sad. “He needs to know, but he needs to know all of it, and later I need to tell Robert the part I never did tell.”
“What part is that?” He murmured against her ear.
“The part about his uncle. All of it, even if he can’t stand to be with me after. I have to tell him.”
“He won’t walk away. I promise you that.”
She nodded, and he knew what she was thinking, but he didn’t know how to make her see that it wasn’t going to happen.
Christian and Delilah took a seat on the loveseat. Liz turned and took a seat in a chair, pulling her legs up to sit cross-legged. Tremaine took a seat on the couch with a pointed look at Liz.
He knew she had a hard time talking about her past. That was laughable. Liz didn’t talk about her past. Ever. She was terrified of her own demons.
Robert came in, his eyes lasering in on Liz, and his mouth set in a hard line. He walked over and sat down on the arm of her chair, but didn’t touch her.
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