by Robin Janney
“No. I need it for today,” said Craig, checking the time. They’d need to leave now; Angela was not going to be happy, but she would get over it. “Thanks Andrew, see you soon.”
He barely heard Andrew’s reply as he ended the conversation and sat his iPhone on the desk. Leaving his office, he hurried to the end of the hallway and crossed the open landing to the stairs. Which he climbed two steps at a time. He found Angela just leaving their bedroom, her empty tea mug and plate in her hand, dressed for riding in old jeans and a t-shirt.
“Craig? What’s wrong?” she asked, startled.
“Nothing, it’s just we need to leave now. Pat has an opening at eleven.”
Angela rolled her eyes and groaned. “Seriously?”
“Something’s come up, and I needed to take the first one available.”
“So, something is wrong?”
“No.” Her eyebrows quirked at him. He hated it when she gave him this questioning look; he’d prefer the withering Carman glare any day. “Alright, yes. I’ll tell you later, just get ready so we can leave, okay?”
“Give me five minutes.” Angela slipped back into the bedroom, and Craig was surprised she didn’t slam the door behind her.
Returning to his office, Craig retrieved his iPhone and slid it into the back pocket of his jeans. He took the time to book a flight for later in the afternoon, expecting Angela to take longer than five minutes. It would have been far more efficient to have an earlier flight, so Angela could’ve dropped him off on the way home from Pat’s, but there was no time for him to pack or arrange the things he needed to for the ranch and the store while he was away. And he didn’t like Angela driving on the highway anyway. He’d just have to waste the gas, he thought as he printed out his flight confirmation.
He didn’t know precisely when he had decided not to take her, but given his stepmother’s open contempt for Angela – there was no way he could justify exposing his wife to the other woman’s attitude. Neither did he want to expose her to his worry about his father, which Angela had already picked up on without even trying. Maybe it was the doubting look she’d given him. Whatever it was, he knew his wife would be safer here than in the city with him.
His wife appeared in the doorway to his office, having changed into newer jeans and a yellow tank top with ruffles along the button-down front. Where and when had she gotten that top? And why? It was enough to set his nerves on edge.
“Why are you wearing that?” he asked bluntly, shutting the laptop down. He folded the printout and shoved it in the other back pocket of his jeans. “You know I don’t like yellow anymore.”
“I dressed to suit your mood,” said Angela tartly, hands on hips. “I have something pink shoved in my purse for later in case your mood changes.”
Craig sighed. “Sorry. Ready?”
“As much as I’ll ever be.” Angela drew the long strap of her black purse over her shoulder and turned away. “Are we taking the truck?”
“Yes,” he called after her. “I’ll be right there.”
She didn’t answer, and he let her go. Stepping into the kitchen, he found Nan at the table with cookbooks spread out in front of her. “Nan, Angela and I will be having lunch out, but Jared will probably still need something. I’m not sure yet what Rick has him doing.”
“I will adjust accordingly,” replied Nan with a raised eyebrow. Craig seldom changed his wife’s menu, or schedule. “Will you be home for dinner?”
“Angela will be. I’ll need to speak with you some time this afternoon as well.”
“I will be here,” assured Nan, her smile light and pleasant as she jested with her employer.
“Good. I’ll see you later.” Craig turned to go out the side door into the garage, but Rick came into the kitchen just then. He’d forgotten about the foreman and sighed. “Rick, it’ll need to wait until I get back from the city.”
“No problem, I’ll just send Trip out in my place and keep myself available.”
“That’ll be fine.” Craig said his farewell to his foreman and joined Angela in their pickup truck. She sat on the far side of the seat, already belted in and although she’d never admit to it, she was sulking. Belting himself in, and starting the engine, he couldn’t resist verbally poking his wife. “Are you going to sulk the entire way there?”
“Yes. Maybe afterwards too,” Angela declared as the garage door came up behind them.
Mildly surprised at her admission, Craig chuckled and put the truck into gear to take it out of the garage. Driving down the long driveway, he sighed and apologized. He didn’t want the two of them to be at odds in the few hours they had left before his flight. They seldom fought, though they weren’t above the occasional moody sniping. Like now. “I’m sorry, Angela.”
She nodded and asked, “What’s happened? We were pretty laid back this morning.”
“Yeah, we were.” As he pulled out onto the main road, Craig considered whether to tell her now or later. “Veronica called me.”
Angela turned her head to look at him, no doubt catching the concern in his voice. “Is everything okay?”
“No,” admitted Craig. “I don’t have all the details, but there was a shooting. My Dad was hit.”
“Oh my God, is he…”
“He’s alive, and in surgery. I’m not sure how bad it is; Veronica didn’t have a lot of details.”
“When do we leave?”
“I fly out this afternoon at four,” he answered her.
His wife drew in a sharp breath. “Just you?”
“Yes. I won’t be gone long, Angel. A few days, I’m sure. A week at most.” He shot her a smile he didn’t really feel. “Just like one of my trips to Tyler’s Grove for the store.”
“Why?” Her disappointment was keen.
Why indeed? Somehow, he didn’t think ‘I’m trying to protect you from my stepmother’ would go over very well. He had no proof his stepmother would make trouble, it was pure instinct. Instead, what Craig said was, “I need you here. Jared’s just getting settled in and started on the job. I want you here to make the transition easier for him. Keep him from getting homesick. And the two of you can spend more time together before he actually has to start work.”
It sounded reasonable enough to him, but Angela fell silent.
Sighing, she flicked imaginary lint off her jeans. “Where will you be staying?”
“Veronica’s offered me my old bedroom in the penthouse. It’ll be easiest. Don’t be upset, Angel. We have our laptops, so we can have a webcam chat every night before bed. It’s not like I’m leaving for good, or leaving you in danger.”
His wife nodded and fell silent. Her gaze was out her window, her face introspective. He’d seen this pose so many times in the past.
“You’re quiet all of a sudden,” commented Craig, when he could no longer stand her silence.
Angela shrugged. “Just thinking.”
Craig let it go at that. He had been afraid this would spark depression in his wife, and he was sad to see it had been a valid fear. His business trips to Tyler’s Grove triggered the same melancholy brooding. The only thing he could do, aside from assuring her it would be a short trip, was to love her. And try not to let his worry about his father infect her with an unneeded burden.
“Slide over?” he asked.
She unbuckled and slid across the seat to lean against him. She sighed as his arm came around her. “I’ll miss you.”
“I know,” he replied softly. “I’ll miss you too. You still have me for a few hours though, so let’s make the most of it.”
13
I t was easy for him to say, ‘Let’s make the most of it’, thought Angela later as she sat in the cushy armchair across from Pat, while her husband sat to the side on a low couch. He often sat in on her sessions, trying to keep on top of her mental health. Sometimes she asked him to leave, but usually she just let him listen. Some things were easier to discuss with him there. And it prevented her from having to repeat herself.
While she waited for the doctor to organize herself, Angela considered the older woman. Pat was in her fifties, tall and thin with long salt and pepper hair. She was a pretty woman, her skin still soft although the corners of her eyes crinkled with wrinkles when she smiled. Today, she seemed nervous. Which was odd, because Pat was usually calm and collected. Almost like a female version of Kevin, but not. She wished she could have spoken with her husband’s best friend more when they’d been in their old house. He made her feel comfortable talking about things, but Sherry was always right there having to poke her nose into things.
“So, Angela, what has you in here today outside of your normal schedule?” Pat asked her, interrupting her thoughts.
Angela shrugged, smoothing the front of the pink short sleeved top she’d changed into. “Craig made the appointment. I just came along for the ride.”
Pat smiled thinly but kindly. It irritated Angela to think she was being patronized. “It’s not the first time he’s done that. Why does it bother you this time?”
“It’s not the first time I’ve cried because of a nightmare. At least I didn’t wake up screaming like I did in Tyler’s Grove. So, I didn’t stop crying until after he’d started making love to me, I’m not sure it warrants an extra trip to see you.”
“I see,” said Pat, in that understanding tone of hers. It always made Angela feel like she was being mocked. Why did she keep coming here? “Have you wondered why it bothered him that much?”
Angela sighed, shooting a quick glance at her husband. He looked tired. And he was the reason why she kept coming to her doctor. “No, I hadn’t.”
“Well, think about it now.”
Flicking imaginary lint off her jeans, Angela studied her husband beneath her eyelashes. Why had it bothered him? It still did, she realized, although it was clouded by worry for his father. Why did he think she couldn’t see his worry? Why did he try to hide it from her? Did he think she was so self-centered that she couldn’t see his battles? Raising her eyes to him, she asked, “Did it make you feel like you weren’t doing something right?”
He shrugged. “A little. It also worried me because of how frantic you were when you woke up, and how long it took you to realize that I wasn’t missing.”
Angela nodded. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s alright, Angel.” His smile was warm, and it warmed the hurting part of her heart.
Pat cleared her throat gently. “What did you dream, Angela?”
Angela repeated her dream for her psychiatrist, from the memory it had reminded her of to Craig disappearing from the dream. Minus the red sand. She also left out the part where her husband would be leaving for New York later in the day. And then she waited for the doctor’s judgment, knowing where the other woman would go.
“Do you feel insecure in your marriage?”
“No.” Her marriage was the surest thing in her world.
“Then has Craig done or said something that would make you think he would leave you in danger?”
Anger sparked in her, despite having expected this line of questioning. She couldn’t even say the word dream anymore with Pat taking this stance. “No.”
Pat sighed. Her expression was vexed. “So then, you can see you have nothing to worry about. Why do you think you would dream something like that?”
“Craig dreamed something similar,” stated Angela, trying not to sound angry. “I think it’s a warning that something bad is going to happen.”
Silently Pat made some notations on the pad of paper in her lap. “Are you taking your medications?”
“No, I flush it down the toilet each morning,” she snapped. Seriously?
“I can’t help you if you’re going to be this way, Angela.” Pat’s gaze was stern.
“Yes.” Angela rolled her eyeballs. “I take my medication like I’m supposed to. If you don’t believe me, ask Craig or Nan, they both keep track of that. Why do you find it so hard to find meaning in dreams? Why is it always me being insecure or having a paranoid delusion?”
“I just think you put too much emphasis on your dreams, and those of your husband. Although he creates quite impressive storylines from his dreams for his comic books, sometimes a dream is just a dream – a reflection of our fears, not a prediction of the future.”
Angela bit back tears before she could answer. She was tired of people doubting her premonitions. Especially when one of the doubters was her husband. Hadn’t he once believed her? She wasn’t sure. “So, it doesn’t strike you odd that Craig is leaving for New York City later today?”
“Not really. He is a businessman, and he often travels. You’ve never had a problem before.”
“Of course I have! I just hide it, so he doesn’t…” Angela cut herself short, looking out the window away from both her husband and her doctor. Outside, the sun was shining in a cloudless sky. The small lake bordering the city shimmered in the light, and she could just barely see the boats floating on it.
Well, she’d started, and she might as well finish. Maybe it was time for this admission. Angela hoped she’d be able to speak without breaking down. “I hate it when he leaves on his trips back to Tyler’s Grove. All I can think of is how I kept us apart after my coma, and how empty I felt then. I know that time bothered him, but these trips don’t bother him at all. And I feel so alone and restless. But I don’t want Craig to stop being who he is either. That’s not fair to him.”
“You know you could always go with him,” suggested Pat kindly. “I’m sure he’d like that as well. It’s not like you haven’t been back for visits.”
Angela could not keep the snarl off her face as Sherry’s face popped into her mind. How could she have done that? It was something Angela wasn’t willing to discuss with her husband present. She’d tried to broach the subject a few times on the way home from Tyler’s Grove, but each time she tried she remembered how Sherry was his friend and she didn’t want to cause strife. And she still hadn’t told him about the resurfaced memories. What if he thought she wanted that kind of attention?
“I don’t feel safe there!” she finally said. “And right now, I’d rather die than set foot back in that fucking town. And Craig’s already told me I’m not going with him to New York.”
Flipping through some papers, Pat cocked her head and from the corner of her eye, Angela saw her doctor glance at Craig. At this angle, she couldn’t see whatever reaction her husband was giving the doctor.
“Did something happen while you were in Tyler’s Grove for your brother’s graduation, Angela?” Pat asked her.
“Something always happens there.” Angela’s right hand twitched, and she clasped both her hands together. “Oh, and I fought with my mother.”
“That does tend to happen,” commented Pat lightly. She tapped her pencil on her paper repeatedly while she looked at Angela. And Angela wanted to reach out and snap the pencil. Finally, the pencil came to a stop and Pat cleared her throat. “Craig, could you step outside for a moment?”
“Sure.” His tone was clipped, and Angela knew he was upset. He didn’t like it when she didn’t tell him everything right away, but he didn’t understand there some things she couldn’t talk about when the hurt was too fresh. Sometimes she needed to think about things first to make sure she wasn’t wrong for feeling the way she did. And the entire thing with Sherry was too complex. The shutting of the office door didn’t relax her any, because she knew Pat was going to expect her to talk.
“What happened, Angela?”
She didn’t want to tell her doctor any more than she wanted to tell her husband. Where to start?
C raig sat in the waiting area outside Pat’s office. The doctor’s name written in a stylized script on a gold plaque on the dark wooden door was irritating him right now. The magazine he was trying to read was upside down, but he scarcely noticed. Old habits die hard, and when Angela had first come into his life, this one had resurfaced. When she’d come back to him after her coma and life in Montana had given them a new start at
‘happily ever after’, the quirk had gone into hiding again, but apparently something about today had triggered it.
Andrew, the receptionist who had taken his call earlier, sat behind a long wooden desk against the far wall, engrossed in conversation with another patient. Their voices weren’t loud, but not easily ignored. Like the script on the door, it irritated him.
Disgusted with himself, Craig tossed the magazine back on the table next to his chair. The article wasn’t interesting anyway. He wasn’t sure if it was concern over his father or Angela. The distance between him and his father had faded somewhat since the older man had come to Tyler’s Grove after the news report about Angela’s kidnapping. They talked more often on the phone, but there had been no more face-to-face visits since the commitment ceremony at his wife’s family farm. Craig had mentioned it a few times, but his father had never taken the bait. It bothered Craig, but he wasn’t all that anxious to be in Veronica’s presence anyway, so he had never pressed the issue.
Pulling his iPhone out of his jean pocket, Craig called Veronica. But she had no news of his father because he was still in surgery. After hanging up from her, he sent a text to Kevin requesting a phone call at his earliest convenience. A return text came quickly, saying it would be a few hours before Kevin could call. He sent a simple ‘ok’ back and pocketed the phone.
Slouching in his seat, Craig tried not to glower at the closed door between him and Angela. After over four years of marriage, there were times he had to drag things out of her. He didn’t understand why it was so hard for her to share things with him, even with whatever memories might be missing. She had to know by now that he’d never judge her or ridicule her. He just wanted to help her.
Why did she doubt him after so many years together?
He didn’t feel guilty for hiding his own worry from her. He was stronger than she was and could handle multiple burdens.
Rubbing his forehead tiredly, he pulled his iPhone out again. Calling Ajax’s, he checked to see if they had a private dining room open in the next hour and was pleased to be able to reserve one for when they were done here at Pat’s.