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Chapter 2
Today’s Workplace
From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Executive Consultation
Date: May 11, 2003 11:11 a.m.
Dear Mr. Hendrix,
How are you today? I am Liz Snow, the Executive VP of Global Software in Atlanta, GA. On Tuesday, May 19th, I will be in Chattanooga and need to schedule an appointment to meet with you, regarding your law firm’s software upgrade.
Please connect with me via email or do not hesitate to call me at 404-555-1212. I welcome a call or email from you at any time.
Cordially,
Liz Snow
Executive VP
Global Software
Atlanta GA
www.global.com
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: No Executive Consultation
Date: May 11, 2003 11:47 a.m.
Dear Ms. Snow,
How nice of you to think of my firm and wish to give me an executive consultation. However, since I have no idea who you are or how you found my email, I must graciously decline your generous offer.
Atlanta VPs are getting a little too bold with small town companies. Keep your city aggressions in Atlanta. Although it is a nice touch, saying you need to schedule an appointment. I have never had a salesperson say they needed an appointment; usually they just want one. Due to this, I will keep Global in mind if my firm wishes to upgrade our software.
Sincerely,
Pete Hendrix
Hendrix, Hendrix & Smith
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Appointment Accepted
Date: May 11, 2003 4:17 p.m.
Dear Mr. Hendrix,
Thank you for your thoughtful email. It is so nice to know that words still have meaning to a few of us! I greatly look forward to our meeting. Please let me know what future date you have in mind.
Chattanooga is a big city to a small town girl. My hometown is LaFayette, GA. Since I will be in Chattanooga next week anyway, please let me know if you would like to meet just to say hello.
Best regards,
Liz
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Date: May 15, 2003 4:37 p.m.
Subject: Curious
Liz,
Just curious. How did a girl from LaFayette get to be a VP for a software firm in Atlanta?
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Long Story
Date: May 18, 2003 8:17 a.m.
Pete,
How are you?
It’s a long story.
Want to call or meet? I’m in Chattanooga until Wednesday morning. Please let me know if you want me to drop by your office. I can rearrange my schedule.
Best,
Liz
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Long Story Short
Date: May 25, 2003 8:36 a.m.
I’m really busy, so just now getting back to you. I really do want to know how a girl from LaFayette became a VP in Atlanta. Don’t try to sell me anything this time. Just tell me how it happened.
How was your week in Chattanooga?
Pete
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Long Way Home
Date: May 28, 2003 3:31 p.m.
Great hearing from you again. Long story short, I grew up in LaFayette, went to school in Nashville on a literature scholarship, then found out I could make more money in a few months from sales than I could ever make as a teacher. So, I’ve never taught a day in my life.
And, I wasn’t trying to sell you anything. I just thought it would be nice to put a face with a name. That’s how we do things in small towns.
Best,
Liz
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: Long Way Home
Date: May 28, 2003 6:07 p.m.
I went to school at Vanderbilt University in Nashville. You won’t believe this, but my undergrad degree is in English & American Literature. I graduated in 1991 with an emphasis on English Poetry. Then the family law firm got me. When did you graduate?
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Verbiage Usage in Today’s Workplace
Date: May 29, 2003 8:04 a.m.
Can’t believe this, but I’m actually going to tell you my age. I graduated in 1995. We may even know some of the same people. We probably had some of the same professors because I graduated from Vanderbilt too.
Isn’t it funny how words can lead to a career you hadn’t planned on and a life you hadn’t planned on?
Not to freak you out too much before the weekend starts, but my emphasis was on the English Poets, too.
Best.
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Verbiage
Date: May 29, 2003 10:12 p.m.
That is a coincidence. It’s almost unbelievable. Reality beats fiction, yet again. Ha ha!
How do I know you’re telling me the truth? Why should I trust a salesperson? Oh, connect with Emma at our front desk to find out what software we use. The firm is considering an upgrade. Your timing is excellent.
x
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Here’s Why…
Date: May 30, 2003 8:01 a.m.
For the same reason I am trusting you to tell me the truth.
Besides that, Shakespeare said, ”The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers.” Henry VI, Part II. And, though I can't recall where, all poets are liars, which means he must have been lying when he said it.
I appear to have much more to lose in this than you do because you have two strikes against you.
*giggle*
xo
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Poets & Lawyers
Date: May 30, 2003 8:11 a.m.
Do you have a personal email? I’ve found an English Poet online. His name is Jack O. Savage. You may like his work, too. He has a blog I follow. I’ll be happy to share the info with you and I would like to see if you enjoy his work as much as I do. He’s brilliant, at least I think so and so do 1.5 million of his followers. He’s like rock star crazzeee. A new Keats for a new millennium.
Here’s my personal email [email protected].
We have a Partners meeting at 11:00 a.m. I believe we are going to get a new software system for the office. We’ve just opened two new law offices: one in Cleveland, one in Dalton.
I don’t know who sent you, but when I find out, I want to personally thank them.
Catch you later.
X
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Poets, Lawyers & Software
Date: May 30, 2003 9:07 a.m.
Why does the song “Lawyers, Guns & Money” come to mind?
Thank you for recommending Global to your partners. I look forward to meeting you and working with you. Do you want me to call you this afternoon, or do you w
ant to call me?
PS…here’s my personal email: [email protected]
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Congrats
May 30, 2003 2:34 p.m.
Congrats,
The partners have agreed to install a new software system. Please keep the cost to a minimum and I can talk them into your price—as long as it’s reasonable. The budget might, stress MIGHT, stretch to $200,000 max. So, don't blow it; be below it. Ha ha! Since you are a local girl, I’m going to trust you on this one because I want to work with you. How’s that?
If you will connect with Emma at our main office number, she can get all the specs to you. You’ve probably spoken with her before. She handles all the incoming calls for the firm.
And, let’s keep this to emails. I talk all day in the office, in the courtroom, and on the phone. Emails are so much better for me.
PH
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Thank You & Follow Up
Date: May 29, 2003 4:12 p.m.
Thank you so much for the referral. I so look forward to working with you and your firm over the next few months as Global installs your new system. Emma and I have exchanged information and I will be on a conference call Monday, connecting your IT department with our IT. Please join us if possible at 2:30 p.m. The conference number is 800-886-5660 access code 863412.
Thank you again and have a wonderful weekend.
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: RE: Thank You & Follow Up
Date: May 29, 2003 5:11 p.m.
Sounds like you don’t waste any time. I like that. Keep me posted on developments in the office. I’ll be in court on Monday afternoon, so I can’t make the conference call. I'm working on the Smith murder case. There was even a piece about it in the paper and on TV—even in Atlanta. But, it is so boring. Why didn't I become a poet, living in the woods? To be honest, being a lawyer so sucks sometimes. Is my secret safe with you? Of course, I'd deny everything if you ever said anything, as you would expect.
What about later? The Poet Savage releases his blog at midnight, London time. Can you connect with me at 7:00 so we can read his latest blog & discuss it?
And, what does October Snow mean? Why is that your personal email?
X
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Later?
May 29, 2003 5:32 p.m.
I can’t make it to the blog later. Sorry about that. Some other time?
Thank you again for the referral and have a great weekend.
Oh, October. That’s my middle name. I have a drama queen mom that thought she was a hippie or flower child or something. She liked the sound of Elizabeth October Snow. My dad agreed simply because he said there was nothing rarer than an October Snow in Georgia. So there you go…silly story, but now you know.
Thank you again for the business. And, I look forward to reading The Poet’s blog. It’s been a long time since I had someone share my love of reading. Thanks for the heads up on that, too. Did I ever tell you I started a reading group at Vandy? I like making things happen.
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]
Subject: Blog
Date: May 29, 2003 6:07 p.m.
What about tomorrow morning over coffee? I found out we can log into a chat room on Yahoo.com that will be just the two of us. Let me know what time & I’ll “see” you then.
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]; [email protected]
Subject: RE: Blog
Date: May 31, 2003 11:31 a.m.
I just now got your email. Can you go online sometime this afternoon? Sorry about that. I don’t usually check my work emails after I leave the office on Friday, but checked them this morning. It’s Sunday & you’re probably busy, but let me know. If you can make it, please let me know what time. I’m flexible today, so any time that’s good for you is good for me. If you can’t make it, I understand. Sometimes spontaneous works and sometimes it doesn’t!
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From: [email protected]
To: [email protected]; [email protected]
Subject: RE: RE: Blog
Date: May 31, 12:17 p.m.
Thank you for the reply. I’ll “see” you on Yahoo at 3:00 p.m. I’ll go on before & set up a chat room for us. I’ve already downloaded The Poet’s blog.
I’m really interested in finding out what you think of him, his blog, & his writing.
Catch ya then.
PH
Chapter 3
Wiki Entry: Jack O Savage
English poet, novelist, and founder member of The Renaissance Bards trio of spoken word artists, Jack O Savage leapt to prominence upon being expelled from Jesus College, Oxford for allegedly plotting an arson attack on the college in which he supposedly planned to 'raise English successist complacency to its foundations', though no charges were ever brought against him. The Sun tabloid newspaper ran a story proclaiming ‘POSH POET GETS CHOP’, referring to Savage's 'chopper protest' in which he was arrested for 'leaping atop a 17th century oak refectory table and lewdly flaunting his ‘generous masculinity' at a formal disciplinary hearing, a gesture which he later repeated in public and which subsequently went viral on YouTube, receiving over 100 million hits in under two hours.
Savage’s notoriety led to a brief appearance on Britain's reality TV blockbuster show I'm A Celebrity, Get Me out of Here, during which recitals of his firebrand poems let to a fistfight with society interior designer Marmaduke Lansdale, whom Savage lampooned mercilessly for being a 'deeply shallow successista'. The show's ratings exceeded 30 million viewers, until Savage sensationally withdrew in protest, delivering a lengthy polemic in ballad format in which he took the British to task for loving their designer kitchens and celebrity chefs more than their poets. Savage later apologized to a cameraman who almost lost an eye and needed several stitches to a facial wound sustained when the enraged poet attacked his camera, yelling 'Death to surveillance!'
Savage's first published work, a collection of 144 poems entitled The Ultimate Modern Luxury received at best tepid reviews, but led to a meeting with long-time role model R.J. Askew at London's Groucho Club, where Askew was attending a friend's book-signing. Askew was so taken by Savage's spirited impromptu performance of his monolithic rock monologue, The Krukenburg Procedure, that he agreed to a spoken word collaboration, which became Renaissance Bards with the inclusion of glamorous wonderkind, Indie Shadwick, whose charismatic lute playing assured the trio's rise to fame, not least because of her penchant for performing topless when the Muse took her.
A tempestuous affair between Savage and the severely bi-polar Shadwick ended in tragedy with Shadwick's suicide after a violent row in which she assailed the poet with a pair of decorating scissors because of his connection with TV producer Daisy Deveraux. Deveraux's claims on Twitter and in the press that Savage had agreed to work with her - which he always strenuously denied - were blamed by him for leading directly to Shadwick's death. This also terminated Renaissance Bards and led to an estrangement with Askew, a rift that Savage blamed for his own descent into despair, which saw him retreat to a friend's remote farmhouse in Nova Scotia.
Savage's 'dark age' led him to write The Zeus Bug, a million word 'stream of unconsciousness' novel about an alienated poet's decade in a metaphysical wilderness of the mind where he comes to believe he is Charlemagne’s Palladin, Orlando Furioso. The novel was a total failure. It did, however, lead Savage to sign a publi
shing deal with Pisstaken Press, which subsequently saw him join them as commissioning editor without a portfolio. His first and only act was to sign a three-book deal with himself, which led to his greatest success to date, Dying Ashes, dedicated to the memory of Indie Shadwick. The work received poor reviews, including one from a rival poet in which it was described as 'a demented herring gull sitting on a rock of nonsense, cackling cacophonously to the great glee of all those A-List star losers fated to hawk Uncle Joe's Bees Wax Ear Plugs'. The public thought otherwise and Dying Ashes has sold well over a million copies, proving especially popular in Japan, where its mix of lyrical discord and spare beauty has resonated with extraordinary potency. In one instance, a man on a Tokyo commuter train was so moved, he read several of Savage's poems out loud, reducing his fellow commuters in the packed carriage to burst into spontaneous applause.
Savage returned to live performance with a tour of literary festival dates, taking in 36 countries in six months, including three stadium shows with British rock band Muse.
Fresh controversy dogged Savage when an Austrian feminist, Mercedes Piklehaub, claimed Savage was the father of her five-year-old son, Jacob O Piklehaub. Piklehaub barricaded herself and her son into a Canary Wharf houseboat in London's docklands financial district, threatening to detonate a firebomb. During the weeklong standoff, she gave tearful YouTube performances in heavily accented English of some of Savage's lesser-known works, including lengthy readings from his now forgotten The Zeus Bug. Police finally coaxed her into giving herself up peacefully, whereupon she was returned to psychiatric custody in Austria. Her son was fictional.
Savage accepted at three-year residency at the University of East Anglia's creative writing department in Norwich, but was unable to take up the post after an encounter with a tainted needle in a New York City tattoo studio where an unnamed woman friend was treating him to a designer inking on his right shoulder. What seemed like a mild case of blood poisoning turned into something far more serious when Savage, in excruciating pain, was diagnosed with necrotizing fasciitis, the flesh-eating super-bug, and was rushed into a decompression chamber for emergency oxygen treatment. Close to death - his heart stopped at least twice - Savage was lucky to survive.
One surprise development during the poet's recuperation was a rapprochement with erstwhile collaborator Askew. Askew played a significant part in Savage's recovery and return to writing duties. Savage repaid his mentor's loyalty by republishing several of his leading works, including his award-winning novella Watching Swifts, under the Pisstaken Press imprint.
September Ends Page 2