There are more than a hundred explosive devices—the very ones I saw below the platforms.
Doc beams his yellowed teeth at me. “Did I mention Ollie’s an electrical genius?”
“If you are depressed, you are living in the past. If you are anxious, you are living the future. If you are at peace, you are living in the present.”
—Lao Tzu
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Kira
Pain shoots through my neck, and my head throbs from strobing images of the bombing victims. I straighten my neck and stretch my hands above my head. I’d fallen asleep on Jax’s shoulder while wading through paperwork in Victor Black’s office.
“Here, let me help you, love.” Jax gently repositions me, so that I’m sitting between his legs, and he digs into the tight muscles in my neck and shoulders. His hands are magic. It feels like heat and a mild vibration are emanating from his fingers. He’s like a human massage wand.
I instantly relax and sink back against him. “Aargh, Jax. That feels so good. How long was I asleep?”
“Not long enough. You’re exhausted.”
A loud and long grumble rolls through my tummy. “And starving.”
Ethan says, “I was just about to walk over to the cafeteria to get some breakfast. Care to join me?” I look over and see him staring at Jax’s fingers like he’s imagining breaking them off one by one.
What I want even more than food is a shower and change of clothes, but there’s no way I’m putting on one of the Clean Slate Complex uniforms. After watching the video of all those people burning in them, I’m convinced they bring bad luck. The SCI should have used red shirts to indicate those who are “disposable.” I’ll settle for a freshening up in the bathroom and a solid meal. “Sure. Just give me a couple minutes. Jax, want to join us?”
He looks over at Ethan who, from the look on his face, is mentally screaming, “Just say no,” and responds. “You guys go ahead. I’ll be here when you get back.”
In the bathroom, I smooth out my yellow dress and run a brush through my hair. I use the travel size toothbrush and toothpaste in my clutch, and I rub some lotion into my face and hands. It will have to do.
Ethan’s waiting for me, and we walk in silence to the cafeteria, which is already bustling with activity. Everywhere I look, I see the cursed, white Henleys and pressed jeans. The people all look so happy. And why wouldn’t they? They used to live in desperate circumstances and now have jobs, homes, food, and “everything they need” courtesy of the SCI. Would they think it was all worth it if they knew they were doomed to die and end up on Thera as subjects of the SCI’s political science experiments?
Ethan grabs us two boxed breakfasts, and we sit down side by side at a table for four.
I open my yogurt. He peels his banana. Ten. Twenty. Thirty seconds of uncomfortable silence. I drink some milk. He eats some cereal. Neither of us speaks or knows what to say. Sixty. Seventy. Eighty.
“So…he loves you.” The animosity in his voice sizzles through the stale air like lightning.
Did Jax ever tell me he loves me? No, not exactly. But he has shown me he loves me through his every action.
“I don’t want to talk about Jax.” Not with Ethan at least.
He bites his lip and nervously runs his index finger across the pad of his thumb. “And you love him. I can tell.” I miss the silence. Déjà vu. Didn’t Blake and I have a similar conversation about Ethan once? I frown.
“But you love me, too?”
I blink rapidly. Two worlds are falling apart, and he wants to have this conversation?
“Ethan…” I stare into his beautiful, sapphire eyes and will myself to come up with words to convey my feelings. Ethan is looking at me like he needs me to answer a question but is too afraid to ask.
He doesn’t wait for my thoughts to organize. Instead, he grabs the back of my neck and without asking, smashes his lips to mine. It’s as if I can feel his thoughts.
Desperation.
Greed.
Longing.
Jealousy.
Anger.
Fear.
“Get a room.” A man cackles as he walks by.
I break the strange, hard kiss, and I can’t help but compare it to the light kiss-that-wasn’t-a-kiss that Jax gave me. Ethan’s cheeks are red, but his facial expression is stone cold. I scrunch my nose. What is his deal? Why accuse me of loving Jax and then kiss me? I shake my head to try to get rid of the cobwebs that have infested my brain and attempt to make sense of him, of me, of my life. It was probably just another manifestation of Caveman Ethan.
“We should get back,” he says. I agree. I’ve met my awkward quota for the morning. He grabs our breakfast remnants, stuffs them into a nearby garbage can, and then charges on ahead, expecting me to follow him to Victor’s office.
Ethan scoffs when he sees that Jax is waiting with a change of clothes and a bag of toiletries from home. “You’ll feel better once you shower and change, love.” He knows that Ethan kissed me. Maybe that’s why he wants me to shower. Jax chuckles and kisses me on the forehead and whispers, “No judgment. When you know, you’ll know.”
Oh I know.
I quickly disappear to take a quick shower, leaving my hair to air-dry after. Jax brought me a comfortable, green jersey wrap dress that works with my brown boots. After dabbing on a little concealer to hide the circles under my eyes, a light coat of mascara, and some lip gloss, I return to help search for clues.
No one talks as we pour through the remaining files. Brad gets more and more agitated as the evidence mounts against the Blacks. It is unreal. Too unreal. They’d have to be idiots to leave all of this for us to find.
I jump up and walk over to Victor’s desk where the case against him is spread out. “Can I?” I ask Brad.
“Sure, though I don’t know what you think you are going to find. It looks pretty open and shut.”
“It does appear to be.” I read through everything. On the one hand, Victor and Violet stole money. They used it to buy resort properties that they may or may not be at right now. On the other hand, they’re devout SCI loyalists who developed the Clean Slate Program from scratch and implemented it with precision.
Why did they use the acid? The thought’s eating at me just like acid. What would they have to gain from the deaths and disfigurement of a bunch of SCI politicians and actors?
Disfigurement. That’s what they were after. What do politicians and actors rely on for their success? Their looks. Yes, they need skills and talent, but let’s face it…our society is nothing, if not vain. We want the people in the public eye to look good.
“It wasn’t Victor and Violet,” I blurt out.
Brad whips his head around. “What? Everything here shows it was them.”
“Politicians get elected based on their looks. Actors and actresses get parts based on their looks. The acid…it was used to disfigure them. Only someone who was decidedly anti-SCI would do that. The evidence shows that Victor and Violet were greedy, but there is nothing that shows that they did anything to subvert the SCI. Gads, they killed thousands to benefit the SCI. They supported Henry’s campaign at every turn. It can’t be them.”
I have everyone’s attention now. Brad pounds his fists on the desk and sends papers scattering. “Who then?”
“Alexa and Joshua. They set Victor and Violet up.” The words come out before I can filter them. I don’t say them with malice, but with an almost reverent respect and awe for pulling off the perfect crime. But when I look up and see Brad’s expression of glee and Ethan’s face of disgust, I want to stuff my words back in, squash them with a mallet, melt them in a bonfire.
It only takes seconds for Ethan to be in my face, spitting his words out. “How dare you? They were kidnapped. They were injured. Their blood was there—lots of blood. Alexa would never do anything like this.” He shakes my shoulders, and I have to grab the edge of the desk to stay steady. “You are just jealous of her. You want to destroy her. Will that make you feel better?
Will that make you feel less guilty about what you have done?”
Jax rips Ethan away from me. “You keep your hands off her, understand? She has done nothing to deserve your ire.”
Ethan is pointing his finger at me, wagging it through the air. “I’m going to prove you wrong. You’ll see. They are innocent, and you will pay for dragging them into Violet and Victor’s filth. You have betrayed me for the last time. I hate you. You are not worthy of me or our child.” I can feel the tears filling my eyes. As I blink, drops escape one by one.
Brad steps between us, holding a hand out to keep Ethan at bay. “Gads, son. It’s just a theory. And it has merit. The acid…it never made any sense, but what Kira said makes sense. Regardless of whether Victor and Violet did this and kidnapped Joshua and Alexa or the other way around, we’ll need to find them to get our answers.” Brad would do anything to remove the stench that Victor and Violet have attached to the SCI and Henry’s pending presidency.
Despite what Ethan says, I think I’m right about Joshua and Alexa. What if I’m wrong? There’s a wide gap between hating the SCI and being willing to coldly and callously kill and maim them. No… I think I’m right. From what Jax has told me, the SCI killed Alexa’s parents and took her brothers away from her. And Joshua has been working with Jax, Ethan, and Blake to subvert Brad and the SCI. I’ve heard them talking. Joshua’s the weapons expert, the military strategist. He’s brilliant. If anyone could pull this off, he could. I keep my further opinions to myself, however. I’ve stirred up the beehive enough for one day.
I feel a hand on my shoulder, and Brad leans in. “I’m glad you insisted upon coming, Kira. I knew those Recruit tests didn’t lie. You’ve been invaluable.”
Great. I helped the enemy. Quid pro quo would say he owes me one. I turn to him. He has answers I need. “What happened to all the babies, Brad? The ones implanted in my friends? Are they alive? Safe?”
He rubs his scruffy chin, and I can imagine the wheels spinning rapidly in his head. “I’d be more than happy to find out the answer to that for you, Kira. It’s the very least I can do. I’ll send word.”
“I’ll see you in the evening,” I tell Jax as we arrive back at our Military City apartment round midday. I’m exhausted, both physically and emotionally. Later I’ll process. Right now, I’m just going to sleep.
He gives me a kiss on the forehead. “Sleep as long as you need. I’ll take care of the babies when they wake up.”
I take off my boots but otherwise climb into my bed fully clothed and succumb to sleep instantly.
When I wake up, I don’t bother to take a shower right away. I want to see Aiden, Evvie, and Zander, but I find their cribs empty. They aren’t in the playroom either, so I head out to the kitchen.
This is so not what I expected to find.
The Genitor is playing airplane with the babies—and not in the traditional sense either. My babies are flying through the air, squealing with delight. Jax is standing next to the boy, laughing, his hand on the boy’s shoulder. It’s uncanny how much the boy looks like Jax. Well, except the eyes. The boy’s eyes are something to behold with not only a variety of colors but insane depth.
The babies aren’t toys, you know.
“I won’t hurt them,” the boy speaks in my mind. “They’re having fun.” I can see that. He has Evvie fly over to me and hover by my face, so I can give her a kiss. Then he gently floats her down into her bouncy chair. He repeats this with Zander and Aiden.
What’s your name? He doesn’t answer, but he and Jax shoot each other suspicious looks. “I shouldn’t say. Names wield tremendous power. Just call me B.”
“B” sits down at the kitchen table next to Jax who hands him a plate of chocolate chip pancakes with strawberry eyes, a whipped cream nose, and a bacon mouth. He holds the bacon up above his mouth like a mustache and Jax chuckles.
“Do I get any food?” I ask Jax. He bites his lip and looks away for a minute. Did I make him mad or something? He always makes me breakfast. I stick my lower lip out in a pout. Jax winks at me and pulls a plate out from behind his back. I kiss him on the cheek, take the plate, and shovel a bite into my mouth before I’m even sitting.
“I’ve got to run. Blake needs me.” When I tense up and frown, he adds, “He’s fine. You’ll be good here with B.”
Sure I will. As long as he doesn’t put me in an ice prison.
Both Jax and B laugh at me, which doesn’t exactly make me feel better.
Jax pulls me flush against him and presses his lips to my cheek, dangerously close to my mouth again. “I’ll see you soon, love.” Then he’s gone.
I watch B devour his pancakes, and I do likewise. “Do your parents mind you being here? Or geez…do you even have parents?”
He giggles uncontrollably for a minute, holding his stomach tight. “Of course I have parents.”
“How many of you…the Genitors…are there?”
B cocks his head to the side. “We are a small but growing number.”
Zander starts to fuss, which starts off a chain reaction. Without touching their seats, B lifts all three of their chairs into the air, and the chairs float over to the sink, rocking back and forth. The water from the sink turns on, and then the water jets upward, making shapes and dancing in the air. The babies are mesmerized by the show but quickly fall asleep by the rocking.
“How long have you known Jax?” I ask. They seem very comfortable together despite their age difference and their difference in “status.”
“We go way back.”
I roll my eyes. The kid isn’t old enough to have a “way back.”
B wipes his syrup-covered face on his shirt and then sits down Indian-style on the floor. He pulls two toy cars out of his pocket and starts racing them around the floor. “I’m mature for my age.”
You are a contradiction is what you are. Out loud, I add. “You are awfully smart for a kid.”
“That’s because I know exactly who I am.”
I slump down next to him on the floor. “You are lucky. I have no idea who I am.”
“There’s no time like the present to seek yourself out.” I feel a prickling in my head, and it feels like the boy is rifling through my memories. “Start here. Consider it a gift.”
Twelve years prior: San Diego, California
I was at the playground adjacent to my elementary school while my parents were inside talking to my teacher for a parent-teacher conference. I pumped my legs to get me higher on the swing set. My strawberry-blonde hair was flying madly behind me.
“I bet I can go higher.” A boy with messy blond hair settled into the seat next to me. He started to pump his legs hard and gradually approached my height. His legs were bigger and stronger than mine. Right before he was set to overtake me, he slowed and let himself drift back to the center, laughing the entire time.
“I win,” I bragged, but I stopped moving my legs and enjoyed the ride back down. I knew he let me win.
“Bet you can’t catch me.” He winked at me before running off. I jumped from my swing, landing on my feet and racing after him. He climbed to the top of the play set and slid down the slide. I followed. As he tried to run off, he tripped on a rock and went rolling into the grass.
I sat down next to him and touched his arm. “I caught you.”
“I wanted you to.”
He didn’t look directly at me. Instead, he looked over at some parents who were watching us. The woman had blonde hair, and the man had light brown hair. The sun shone behind them, washing out their features.
“Are those your parents?” I asked. There were lots of kids running around, so they could be anyone’s parents. But they were only watching us.
He closed his eyes and shook his head. “Nope. Not mine.”
I looked back at the couple, but they were gone. “They disappeared. They were there one second and gone the next.”
The boy didn’t respond to that. Instead he shrugged and said, “You should be mine…my friend.”
&n
bsp; “Why would I want to be friends with a boy?” I didn’t like most of the boys in my class. They always pulled my ponytail and threw tiny balled up pieces of paper at me. And my little brother Jared drove me crazy. He was always stealing my stuff.
He laughed. “Because I’m a cool boy. I’ll keep the not-so-cool boys away from you. Everyone needs someone to watch over them.”
“Fine, I will be your friend. But only if you keep the other boys away.”
“Always. I promise.” He looked right at me as he said it, and I saw his eyes for the first time. They took my breath away. I’d never seen anything like them. “Shake on it?”
We shook hands, sealing our deal. And then he ran off towards the sun. I watched until he seemed to get swallowed by the light, the brightness nearly blinding me.
I had forgotten about the boy.
I never saw him again. Or did I?
Present
The Genitor is gone. I feel strongly that the couple watching me on the playground that day were my parents. They disappeared. What are they? Why would they give me up? Why have they never come to find me again?
I’m agitated and lost in thought when Jax returns. He’s not alone, which annoys me further. In fact, he has a petite, dark-haired beauty with him. My heart pounds in my chest, and I feel like I might have heartburn.
“Kira, I’d like you to meet Blake’s friend, Madison. He asked me to bring her back here with me. She wasn’t safe in Art City. He’d like her to stay here with us until he returns.”
Blake’s “friend?” Since it takes quite a bit for Blake to care about anyone’s safety but his own, I’d venture a guess that he likes her as more than a friend. She looks scared and intimidated—the polar opposite of Blake’s last fling, Bailey.
“Nice to meet you, Madison.” I hold out my hand to shake hers. She softly shakes it. I think she’s actually trembling. “Don’t worry. You’ll be safe here…well, as long as you don’t leave the apartment.”
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