by Holly Jacobs
“I’m Sebastian,” he said quickly, extending his hand to shake hers. She drew back and immediately he felt sick. He recognized this behavior. But unlike Lily, her mother didn’t force herself to step forward again. She kept out of reach.
“Sebastian, this is my mother, Vera. Mom, this is a good friend, Sebastian. He offered to drive me here today.”
He could tell from the woman’s face that she realized Lily must have told him what went on here. Horrified was how she looked.
He understood her embarrassment. He’d often hidden his arm and hand away, as if somehow no one would notice. He’d stopped doing it so gradually that he wasn’t even sure when that had happened.
“Maybe I can carry your things out for you?” he offered.
She nodded and stepped farther back, giving him a wide berth. “They’re in the front closet. I didn’t want your fa—anyone to see before you came.”
Sebastian took the small suitcase and the light totebag. “Is there anything else you need, ma’am?”
Vera looked around the room, and Sebastian followed suit. It was a medium-size space with an open living-dining area. A narrow hall jutted off to the right. He assumed the bedrooms and bathroom were down that way.
“No. There’s nothing else I want or need.” Vera Paul straightened her shoulders, grabbed a purse off the hook by the door and crossed the threshold. In that one act, he saw Lily. He saw a hidden strength in Vera. One she probably didn’t know she had. One he was hoping that Lily could see and foster.
Sebastian trailed after Vera, and Lily came last. He glanced back and saw her peering inside the house. He wondered what she was thinking. “Did you want to go out back?”
“No. He took that swing down when I was in high school. All that’s left there is the trace of a memory.”
“Of one happy day,” he said.
“And what we could have been.”
“There’s the world the way you want it to be...”
“And the world the way it is.” Lily squared her shoulders and gave a small nod. “And mom and I are going to have to find a way to deal with the way it is.”
They went over to his car, where Lily’s mom was waiting.
“So where are you going to take me?” she asked softly, seemingly resigned to having no say.
Here was a woman who hadn’t had any say in anything for years.
“It’s your choice, Mom. There are shelters. I have a list. And I’ll take you to any of them you want, or you can come home with me. I’d like it if you did, but this isn’t about me. It’s about you. About what you want. You’re taking the first step, and you get to decide where you’re stepping to.”
“If you don’t mind, I’d like to come home with you, Lily Claire, at least for a while, until I can decide what to do next. But I don’t want to be a burden.”
“Never that, Mom.”
Lily gave him another small nod, and once inside the car, Sebastian started the engine and backed out of the driveway. “We’re officially on our way, ladies.”
They drove away from the house Lily had grown up in. The small, tidy jail her mother had lived in for years.
It seemed anticlimactic to Sebastian. He’d almost hoped that Lily’s father would make a scene and try to stop them. But no one came. And they left.
Maybe anticlimax was part of the reason for his anger when he’d returned to Valley Ridge. He’d been a marine. He’d fought for his country. He’d always known he could be injured. But a freak two-second car accident? That seemed like an anticlimactic ending to the story. And his friends had kept on fighting without him. He’d let them down.
Sebastian snuck a quick look behind him. Lily was in the back and she sat resolutely, holding her mother’s hand.
There was the world the way you wanted it, and the world the way it was. Sometimes, if you were really fortunate, the way you wanted it to be would match the way it was.
That was what was happening for Lily.
And maybe, if he was very careful, it could happen for him with her.
Sebastian headed through Franklin, then turned north on I-79. Back to Valley Ridge.
* * *
APPROACHING HANK’S HOUSE, Lily grew anxious that her mother was regretting leaving. Lily wanted to say something soothing. Something to prove to her mother that it would be all right. She might tell her mom that it was all right, but until she could feel it, Lily would be concerned for her.
After Lily showed her mother her renovated apartment, she hugged her. “I know it all feels surreal right now, Mom, but please give it some time. I’ll help you however you’ll let me. But for now, let’s get you settled.”
As she opened the bedroom door, her mother noticed the double bed and shook her head. “I won’t take your bedroom, Lily Claire.”
“Mom, I’ll have to tell you about what we’ve done to the place. But know I’ve spent more time in the main house lately than in here.”
“But, Lily...” Her mother stopped as if she wanted to argue but had forgotten how.
“Mom, please let me do this for you. It’s a small enough thing. Take some time and figure out what you want to do.”
“I can figure for a long time, but I don’t think I’ll come up with anything. I don’t know how to do anything.” Her mother seemed to shrink before her eyes, as if the enormity of what she’d done was pushing down on her.
“Mom, you took a first step. A big one. Try not to think too far ahead. Let’s start with you’ll stay here tonight, and tomorrow, you walk up the pathway to the kitchen door of the main house. Come on in. There will be coffee perking and breakfast. And after that—” She shrugged. “We’ll work it out.”
Her mother hesitated. “Okay.”
“Did you want to talk about—” Her mother was already frowning before the question was even asked, so Lily let it go. She understood not wanting to talk about the past. So she settled for hugging her mother again. “Mom, I’m so happy you’re here.” And she was. The thought of her mother not being under her father’s thumb soothed her.
“Your father’s going to be so angry.” Her mother’s voice was a hoarse whisper, as if her father would somehow hear the words. “He doesn’t like it when he comes home and I’m not there, especially after a boys’ night—”
“But you’re not there.” Lily remembered boys’ nights out. They were simply an excuse for her father to drink in the company of friends. And they never ended well for her mom when he came home. “You won’t be there if he’s mad.”
That evoked a bit of a smile. “No, I won’t.”
“I know that the devil you know is sometimes easier to face than the one you don’t, but please, Mom. Please give it a chance. I’ve got the name of someone you can talk to. You deserve to be happy.”
Her mother didn’t look convinced; still, she said, “I love you, Lily Claire. I know I didn’t do right by you, but I’ve always loved you.”
“And I’ve never doubted that, Mom. I love you, too.” She looked at her mother’s meager suitcase on the bed. “Do you need anything else?”
“No, dear.”
“I’ll be up for a few more hours if you want company, but it’s fine if you want some alone time.”
“Thank you, I do.”
“Then I’ll see you in the morning. If you need me, I can be here in a few seconds.”
Once she was outside Lily thought about going into Hank’s house, but instead, she sat on the glider. She rocked to and fro as twilight settled over the yard. She wished it were summer and fireflies were out. But she could hear insects whirring and chirping, and there was enough of a breeze that the leaves rustled. The old glider creaked softly. She closed her eyes and relished the sweet cacophony of the evening.
“Do you mind if I sit here?”
Lily wasn’t surprised to see Sebastian standing next to the glider. “We have to stop meeting like this,” she quipped, but she was afraid that it fell flat.
“You’re worried,” he stated as he sat d
own across from her.
“Yes. She took such a big step and she’s afraid. She doesn’t know what to do now.”
“Why don’t you see if she wants to help out at the diner? For now, at least,” he suggested. “It would keep her busy and give her a purpose each day.”
“That’s nepotism. I don’t want you to feel as if I’m taking advantage of you and Hank.”
He was wishing he’d sat next to her.
“Lily, I was a jerk when I first came home.”
“Only when you came home?” she teased.
“What I said, my suspicions about what you were doing and why, they were nothing.” He leaned across the glider and gently caressed her cheek. “You stepped in and helped out my grandfather when I wasn’t here, and you’re still helping him, and you don’t know how much you’ve helped me. I remember arriving back in Valley Ridge and thinking I was numb. Everything seemed gray, nondescript, even meaningless. But slowly, I found my anger. Just that. Anger. Anger at a twist of fate that changed my future. Anger that I couldn’t do the simplest tasks, like tying a shoe. But all of that was merely my way of hiding what I really felt. Guilt that a stupid accident was going to keep me from fighting next to my friends. And guilt that I couldn’t—can’t—save Hank. You took all that and smoothed it over. I still feel angry and guilty, but I understand it, and that has made all the difference.”
He paused, then continued in a quiet voice, “After all you’ve done for me and Hank, how could we do any less for your mother?”
Lily wanted to deny what he’d said about her. Maybe she had helped, but he’d figured things out on his own. Not because of her, but because he was such an amazing man. He’d adapted and overcome so much, and looked to help others, his friends, neighbors, especially Hank.
“I hope my mother can find the strength to build a new life for herself,” she admitted. “I’ve tried to get her to do this for years. I wanted her to see that she was worthy of being happy and safe. I don’t want to mess up now.”
“Your mom left on her own. This is up to her. We’ll help, but it’s on her, Lil.” He moved to the seat next to her, and the glider tilted back at a severe angle.
“I know you’re right.”
He tucked her close to him and they sat together, rocking, watching the stars. They both sat up straight when they heard the sound of voices. It was Hank with Megan. Sebastian got out of the glider and called out, “Hi, guys.”
“I went into the diner for a bit tonight, but I forgot it was Sunday and we close in the afternoon.”
“I happened to see him,” Megan said, “and we took a stroll back here.”
“I’ll walk you home,” Sebastian said to the diner’s part-time waitress.
“You guys know we live in Valley Ridge, not New York City, right?” Megan teased.
Sebastian gestured toward the path. “All right, come on, then, marine. Let’s go.”
Lily felt guilty. Her first move when they got back should have been to check on Hank, or send Sebastian into the house to check on him.
“You okay, Lily-girl?” Hank asked.
“Only tired.” She stretched and took a deep breath. “My mom’s come for a visit, Hank. I hope you don’t mind that I gave her my place. I thought I’d move back into your house for the duration.”
The older man leaned in and hugged her. “It’s your home. Wherever I am, Lily, that’s your home.”
* * *
THE NEXT MORNING, Lily was the first one down to the kitchen. No surprise there. She was almost always up and about early. Those morning hours, where the only sounds were the birds chirping, an occasional car driving by and the newspaper thwapping against the front door, were usually her favorite.
She worried about her mother today. She worried about Hank.
She worried...
Lily reminded herself that all the worrying in the world wouldn’t change anything as she began making the coffee and listened to the familiar chugging and hissing as it perked. Today was not going to be a day for quiet morning reflection, so rather than sitting and worrying, she decided to make muffins for breakfast. She found Mattie’s recipe and made a batch. Lily had put them in the oven just as Hank arrived.
“’Morning, Hank,” she called out.
He didn’t smile or respond to her salutation, but sat down at his seat at the table. “Lily, before anyone else gets up, I want to talk to you as a nurse.”
“Sure, Hank.” She poured him a cup of coffee and sat down beside him.
“Thank you,” he said, taking the cup and adding a teaspoon of sugar. “Now, Lily, I want you to make that appointment with the doctor. I seem to get confused a lot. Like this morning, I woke up and knew I should remember something you said last night, but I can’t.” He stirred his coffee with more force than was required.
“About last night—my mother’s going to be in my apartment for a while, and unless you object, I’ll live here with you and Sebastian.”
“You’re welcome to as long as you want,” he told her. “It’s your home.”
That was the easy part. Lily gathered her courage and said, “And we already saw the doctor. You’ve got dementia, Hank. He put you on that new medicine?”
“Oh, right. But it won’t cure me.”
Her eyes welled up, but she refused to let the tears fall. Hank needed her to be strong. “No. Although it will help.”
He thought for a moment, a serious look on his face. “I’ll still get confused.”
“Yes. And you have me to remind you,” she promised. “I’ll help as much as I can.”
He reached out and patted her hand, trying to comfort her. Here he was losing himself to this horrible disease and he worried about her. “Do they have homes for this? Places I can go?”
“They do. But you’re not there yet, Hank. You’ll have good days and bad days. Right now it’s mild and we can cope.”
“But someday the medicine won’t work and I’ll get worse and worse.” It was a simple statement, reflecting no fear.
“Yes,” she said softly.
He nodded, stopped stirring his coffee and took a sip. “When the time comes, you’ll find a home, right? Somewhere I’ll be safe and won’t put you to any trouble?”
“When the time comes, I will,” she assured him, then repeated, “but you’re not there yet.”
“Can we keep this from Seb? I don’t want him to stay for me.”
“He’s leaving after the wedding,” she said, feeling a twinge of regret. She’d miss him. That hadn’t happened before. Other than Justin, the other men she’d dated had been so casual and the relationship so short-lived that she’d never missed the guys when she broke things off. But that wouldn’t happen with Sebastian. “I’m sure he’ll visit as often as he can,” she said as much for herself as for Hank.
“Well, okay, then. I can’t do anything about it, so I’m not going to worry about it.” He kissed her cheek. “Thank you for being honest with me.”
“I’ll never lie to you.” Just like that, he put aside his concern. She wished she had that ability. The oven timer dinged. It was a relief to have something to do.
She set the muffin pan on a trivet and Hank said, “I want to have you or Sebastian buy the rest of the diner from me. You two talk and let me know. I put the house in his name years ago, so that’s already done.”
She popped a muffin out of the tin and placed it on a plate, which she took to Hank. “I will. I’ll talk to him.” The soft tapping on the kitchen door interrupted them. “Now, if you’ll wait right there, I want to introduce you to my mom.”
Lily opened the door and her mother came in. “How did you sleep?” she asked as she studied her mother’s appearance. Overall, her mom looked better than Lily expected. She waved her forward and shut the door.
“I slept wonderfully, Lily Claire. I want...” Her mom spied Hank and let her sentence fade.
Lily took her mom’s hand and brought her toward the table. “Mom, I want you to meet one of my firs
t friends here in Valley Ridge. Hank Bennington, this is my mother, Vera Paul.”
Hank stood and motioned to a chair at the table. “It’s a pleasure, ma’am. Now, I might forget you tomorrow, but you don’t take offense, okay? Turns out I’ve got dementia.”
“I’m so sorry,” her mother said as she took the seat Hank had offered.
He sat as she did. “I’m lucky, the way I see it. I’ve got people like your daughter who will look after me.”
Lily got her mother a cup of coffee and watched as Hank worked his magic. Some might think magic was too strong a word, but Lily wasn’t sure. The ability to accept people, to embrace them as they are, was one of Hank’s strongest gifts. She hadn’t seen it when she’d met him, but she could now. He had a warmth and openness that invited trust and friendship.
Hank Bennington was the kind of man her mother needed in her life.
Lily mentioned a job for her mom at the diner, and Hank joined her in encouraging her mother to try it. “You’d be doing me a favor. Lily can’t watch me all the time, and when I get worse, I’ll need all the help I can get.”
Sebastian came into the room, newspaper in hand. He got his coffee and a muffin before sitting down at the table. “Good morning, Mrs. Paul.”
“Vera, please,” she said timidly, as if unsure about questioning what he’d called her.
“Vera. Has Lily explained how mornings work around here? She gets the entertainment section of the paper. Hank gets the sports. Me, I’m national news, or I’m happy to switch if you prefer that over the local section?”
Lily could see her mother relax as she said, “Since your grandfather offered me a job at the diner, maybe I should start with the local section? I should learn what I can about my daughter’s adopted hometown.” Her mom paused, as if waiting to see if her wants were all right.
Sebastian reached under the table and patted Lily’s knee. It was a small gesture that said he knew she was worried and that he was going to do what he could to be there for her.
Her entire life, Lily had felt alone. She knew her mother loved her, but prior to yesterday, not enough to leave her father. Lily had never had friends she could turn to. She’d never had someone to rely on.