by Celeste Buie
It took six hours to complete the float. We put the finishing touches on and took some commemorative yearbook pictures before pushing it into their four-car garage until parade day. I stood by Elyse, running her through Landon’s introduction to my parents this morning when he shouted, “Brynn, just let me know when you’re ready to go and I’ll take you home.”
Elyse and I looked at each other, not believing that he would really show off this much. I shot him a disgusted look. “You might want to say it a little louder. I don’t think the whole neighborhood heard you.”
“He’s driving you home?” Emilee asked, looking skeptical.
“Unfortunately. I was fooled into thinking it was something I had to do.”
“Huh,” she said as she looked between us, apparently deciding if she should turn it into a big deal. She must have realized I wasn’t excited about it.
We ignored Landon as long as possible, but I couldn’t avoid the inevitable. Others were wrapping up their conversations and saying good-bye for the day. The float was done, and it was time to go.
This was the other part of the day that I’d dreaded. We walked to his car just after everyone else left to walk to theirs. I couldn’t help thinking this was how he had planned it. I caught the guys’ expressions as they watched us approach his car. The reluctant glances and the expressionless stares made me feel like I was on display, although I wasn’t making a statement with Landon.
Great, I thought sarcastically, just what I wanted. Why does he have to make waves within our group?
As soon as the car started, I reached over to turn the radio up loud enough to discourage conversation. He saw through my charade and turned it off.
CHAPTER 19
“You’re quite good at avoidance tactics. I doubt many people call you out on them, though,” Landon said as he merged with traffic.
When I didn’t respond, he smugly asked, “Does it scare you how well I can read you?”
“Is there something specific you’d like to discuss now that there’s no music to listen to?”
“There is something I’m curious about.”
The tone of his voice was lighter. The teasing and smugness were gone. It seemed like a safe enough topic change. I turned my head to him.
“Why did you practically run away from Elyse my first day at your school? You were so composed—well, after the shock wore off—before she showed up.”
I sighed. This innocent question related to a topic I wasn’t excited to talk about.
“Of course, don’t answer if you don’t want to,” he said. He’d read my reaction perfectly. This was another question I wanted to avoid. He was right. Again.
He’d be shocked if I honestly answered him. I took in a huge breath with that realization. That’s what I’d go for. And the more he thought I was opening up to him, the faster I could find out what’s going on with him and Trevor. “She’s blunt,” I said. “Sometimes it’s too much to handle, even for me. She wasn’t being subtle about insinuating we should be together. Her suggesting that made me uncomfortable, and I assumed it would make you uncomfortable, and then you’d act awkward around me, and I would be awkward around you, and it would turn into this big, complex ball of awkwardness, more so than it already is. So I got out of there as fast as I could. Going to a new school is scary enough; I didn’t want you thinking I thought we should be together.”
“You’re uncomfortable around me? I thought we were beyond that. And I don’t scare easily.”
“Now you tell me.” I crossed my arms and shrugged. What was there to say? “Elyse has very strong feelings about what’s gone down with Trevor. We grew up together. So did our dads. There’s a lot of history there. We were always together, and then he starting cancelling on me. He became totally undependable. Then this summer, he said he needed a break. Some nonsense about how things have changed…but nothing has. Elyse wanted to match me up, regardless of my requests not to. She means well. She just wants me to be happy again. But I don’t want anything forced.”
We were both quiet for a minute. He was probably thinking how complicated and dramatic my life was and that I was just looking for an opportunity to talk about it.
I started to get agitated. I was the only one sharing personal history. “Congratulations. You actually got two answers in one.”
“He must have had what he thought were good reasons to justify treating you that way,” he said after a brief pause. His voice was strained.
“That’s really comforting. Now it’s your turn to share.”
He shrugged. “Don’t have any exes.”
That wasn’t what I thought he’d share, but it was my fault I didn’t ask the question I wanted the answer to. I couldn’t help taking the bait. “You’ve never had a girlfriend.”
“Dating hasn’t been my priority,” he answered in a firm voice.
“That’s hard to believe.”
“Is that the kind of guy you think I am?”
“Don’t be sensitive. I don’t mean it in a bad way.”
“In what way do you mean it?” he said.
“It’s refreshing you’re not that type of guy, but I meant it in an it’s-surprising way.”
He turned into my driveway. “And why’s that?”
“Hey, it’s my turn to ask the questions.”
“I’m just asking for clarification,” he teased.
I looked at him and tried to suppress a smile.
He did the same.
We stared at each other long after the smiles faded. A lot changed in those moments.
I whispered, “What are you really doing here?” I was afraid to ask. Afraid he would tell me the truth. Afraid it would devastate me.
He shook his head. “I thought I knew. Now I’m not so sure.”
“I know you and Trevor are involved in something.”
He brushed my cheek with the back of his hand. It gave me chills. “I know you’re only nice to me to figure out what it is.”
That wasn’t completely true, but I wasn’t going to admit it out loud. “I’m not going to apologize.”
“Me either.”
“Thanks for the ride. I didn’t suffer as much as I thought I would.”
“Aw, that’s nice to hear.”
“See ya Monday,” I said before I shut the door.
CHAPTER 20
My parents pretended to be nonchalant when I walked into the house, but I could tell they were anything but. My mom made it known how much she liked Landon and said it would be nice to see him again. My dad looked like he approved too. They probably talked about me after we left. Parents.
“What else do you have planned for the weekend, Brynn?” my mom asked.
“Not much. I have homework to do later, but I’ll help you make dinner.”
“I’d love help. I have that new recipe I want to try.”
She was always up for trying out new recipes. I was too, as long as it was simple. There were times that I loved to be in the kitchen all day, creating new things. It was a type of therapy.
We made some fancy casserole dish from her friend’s recipe, and it tasted amazing.
I volunteered to wash the dishes to procrastinate doing my homework. Surprisingly, I didn’t have that much, but what I had, I dreaded. The math problems were lengthy, and I wasn’t feeling creative enough to start my short story.
After the dishes were clean, I wiped down the table and counters. Without anything left to do, I headed to my room.
Just as I pulled out my books and organized them on my desk, my cell rang. I checked the display. Trevor. I debated between answering it, or letting it to go to voice mail and dealing with him later. If it went to voice mail, I’d have to call him back eventually…and I’d have to think about calling him back until I actually did, which defeated the whole purpose of avoiding his call. I grabbed the phone.
“Hi.”
“Hey, Brynn. How are you?” He sounded cheery and upbeat, like he had talked to me yesterday instead of a
month ago.
I was instantly cautious, then guilty. I hoped he was happy, even if he wasn’t with me. “I’m fine. What’s up?”
“I was curious about homecoming.”
I gave him a few seconds to voice the rest of his thoughts, but he didn’t.
“What about it?” I asked slowly.
“Do you want me to go with you?”
“I’m sorry. What?”
“I was hoping you would want me to go with you. It’s your senior year. The last one you’ll be going to. Unless you fail on purpose.” He sounded amused at the thought.
I sighed. “I’m not going to lie to you and say that I hadn’t hoped we’d go together. But I just don’t know if that’s the right thing to do. If I was being selfish, I’d say yes, but…everyone would think we’re together again and ask me about it. I don’t want to deal with that.”
“Okay. How’s your senior year going?”
I was surprised at his easy transition to a different subject, but grateful. “Pretty good. Keeping me busy. I’m looking forward to dressing up for Spirit Week.”
“Always a fun week.”
“What about you? Classes still going okay?”
“I’m holding my own,” he said too quickly. “It’d be cool if you came by my parent’s annual Halloween party. Even if you just stopped in, if you already have plans.”
“I’ll think about it.”
“Okay, well, just give me a call if you change your mind and want a date for the dance.”
I laughed. “Having a date isn’t a problem,” I mumbled.
“Do you have one?” There was hesitation in his voice.
“Not specifically. Mostly we’re going as a big group.”
“Do I know everyone?”
“Yep. Better than you realize.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Uh…” I couldn’t answer him.
“Who are you hanging out with that you don’t want me to know about?” he pressed. My heart broke out in a sprint. I didn’t know if I should tell the truth or lie. “Don’t make me check up on you,” he threatened.
“Really, Trevor? Is that who you are now?”
He was silent so long I debated hanging up, but I didn’t need him sticking his nose in my business. I sighed. “Landon.”
“Are you kidding me!” he exploded.
“He goes to my school now,” I said by way of defense.
“Unbelievable! What a sneaky little…didn’t you recognize him?”
“Of course.”
“And you thought it was a good idea to befriend him?”
“It was a slow process.”
“I do everything I can to keep you out of this and you undo it all.”
“I have a right to know what’s going on. It’s not my fault you disappear from my life because it’s easier for you.”
“If you’re using him to get to me, stop. He’s not the type to be used.”
“Thanks for the warning. I can take care of myself.”
“I have to figure out what to do from here.” He sounded more concerned than necessary. “You make my life so complicated.”
“Thanks for the call. Always great to hear from you,” I said before I hung up on him.
I stared at the phone, contemplating my next move. Why did everything have to go so wrong every time I talked to him? I was tired of doing everything on his terms, and only when he felt like including me.
But I had bigger issues. Landon knew the true motivation behind why I started talking to him, and now Trevor knew I was hanging around Landon. I didn’t know what he planned to do. Would he confront Landon? I couldn’t protect him from himself, and if he was foolish enough to start trouble over Landon going to my school, then he deserved the repercussions. And what did he care anyway? We weren’t together. He was probably just upset that I had a way to access his new secret life.
I typed up a fast message to Elyse. I need to talk to you! Call me!
Okay, give me ten.
My head was spinning by the time Elyse called, and I could only talk to her about the first issue—and only part of it at best. The other I’d have to figure out on my own. I still hadn’t told her the guys knew each other. What would happen if they both went to homecoming? My brain turned to slush.
“Would you think I’m crazy if I wanted Trevor to go with me to homecoming? He just called to ask me about it.”
“Seriously?”
“Yep. Just got off the phone with him.”
“Did I hear you right? He called you?”
“Yeah. He said that he was hoping I’d want to go with him.”
“Do you think he’ll show up at the game Friday night?”
“I don’t know, but thanks for giving me something else to worry about. Would you please answer my first question?”
“No, I wouldn’t think you’re crazy. I think it’s a tough decision, though. I’m not sure that I would if I was in your situation, but you’re more forgiving than me where he’s involved. I’d support you either way. What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know.”
“What do you want to do?”
“I don’t know.”
“Alright. Just start talking and we’ll figure this out.”
“On one hand, it’d be nice to have him as my date. I mean, I know we’re all going as a big group, so I don’t need one, but it would be really great to see him and talk to him. Maybe it could be like things were back to normal. On the other hand, I’m not sure I want him there or that I want to see him. It might just confuse things even more. And having Landon and Trevor there…I just don’t know.”
“Would you rather go with someone else? I know of the perfect date. You already mentioned him,” she teased.
“Are you trying to help me or further complicate my life?”
“Help you! I’m always trying to help you. How could you ask me that? A definitive answer like wanting to go with someone else could help you decide.”
“I can’t even clear my head enough to think about it. What else ya got?”
“Nothing else. It’s your decision. Do what you want to do, and don’t think about anyone else. Make a mental pro/con list. That usually helps, and you already have one started. Call me with your results.”
“Thanks,” I said sarcastically. “I’ll get right on it.”
“Tell me about driving with Landon today.”
“Ugh. I still can’t believe he came to the door and met my parents!”
“How proper.”
“Yeah. My mom loved it.”
“What did you talk about in the car?”
“All different stuff. He mostly asked me questions, but I got a few in,” I said.
“Sounds like he wanted to get to know you better. Maybe that’s why he wanted to spend some time with you.”
I made a face. “I guess.” It didn’t seem like he needed any more time to get to know me. He was so good at reading me already. How could he be so accurate after only knowing me for a month and a half?
“Hey, Jared just showed up. Call me tomorrow if you want to do something. We can go to the mall or to the library. I’ll have to fit in some time to work on my English paper, and it’s not going to happen tonight. Bye,” she said with a smile in her voice.
Now I definitely didn’t want to start my homework. She was having fun on another Saturday night, while I sat at home.
I switched thoughts between Trevor’s homecoming and Halloween offer, and how I might have confused Landon’s insistence to drive me as repayment for the Emilee thing.
I resigned that my homework wouldn’t get done. I left everything out in case inspiration hit. At least I could do it with Elyse tomorrow. We could suffer through it together, and I could have someone to talk to. I turned on my MP3 player and sprawled over my pink and grey flower comforter. I switched from band to band until I found the right music.
Motivation never came, but after a few hours, sleep did.
C
HAPTER 21
The next day, I went grocery shopping with my mom. I felt a little guilty for closing myself up in my room last night. It wasn’t like I didn’t spend any time with her yesterday—we cooked and ate dinner together, but I had some thinking to do, and sometimes I just wanted to be alone. Luckily, my parents understood my need for space.
I helped my mom put away the groceries before I called Elyse to find out when she could meet up at the library and do homework.
I drove to the library and found her in our usual spot in the far corner, all the way in back. We typically had the entire area to ourselves, since it was the farthest study section from the main entrance. It gave us a chance to talk without bothering others.
Once we settled in, I asked what they ended up doing last night.
“We went out for coffee and rented a movie. Very low key. Although something much more intriguing happened.”
“What happened?”
“You’re going to freak.”
“Okay.” It was never good when she upped the dramatics.
“We saw Trevor last night when we left the coffee shop. He didn’t see us because we were already in Jared’s truck. But guess who he was with?”
I bet I knew. I couldn’t breathe.
“Landon! Can you believe they know each other? How is that even possible?”
I took a deep breath. “Landon was part of the group Trevor was with at Alyssa’s grad party when he left the psychic’s table, and he was with the guys who showed up at Trevor’s party.”
“Look at you being all quiet about it.”
“I wasn’t positive until Landon confirmed it,” I justified, which wasn’t exactly the truth. I would have recognized Landon anywhere. “I don’t know what it means, but maybe I can find out what Trevor’s been up to through Landon.”
“You sneak! I bet that’s not the only reason you’re cozying up to Landon. But you know I’ll help any way I can. Just let me know. I just think it’s so crazy they know each other when Landon just moved here.”