Accidental Nanny

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Accidental Nanny Page 13

by Lindsay Armstrong

Because its showed her character? he pondered. Because she was still lovely—even when she was tired, pale and a little thinner, when her head was pounding but she carried on, when you knew there was a lot more to her than you’d imagined, knew she was brave, feisty and sometimes a complete enigma?

  ‘What am I going to do with you, Chessie?’ he murmured, barely audibly and without thinking—without realising he was thinking aloud, in fact.

  ‘Do?’ He’d known it would happen, and it did as she repeated the word. Her spine straightened, her shoulders squared and that gorgeous mouth he’d plundered so pleasurably a few times now, set severely for a moment. ‘Just go to bed, Raefe; there’s nothing you need to do,’ she said evenly. ‘Didn’t I tell you? You don’t need to lose any sleep over me.’.And she got up and strode out of the kitchen.

  He waited, until he heard her bedroom door close, then got up himself and went into the lounge to stand staring down at the photo of himself. and Olivia.

  Although she had closed herself into her bedroom Francesca wasn’t ready for bed, and she sat by the window for a long time, looking at the moonlit garden, watching the shadows float over the sea as clouds sailed across the moon, remembering the sound of the wind although it was now a still, perfect night.

  Rather like the shadows that exist between me and Raefe, she thought tiredly, although now it was more a mental weariness. It’s almost as if there’s a dark moon up there, making sure any hopes I have are doomed—why do I persist in having any hopes?

  Because there are times, she answered herself, when you can’t forget what it feels like to be in his arms, times when it feels so natural just to talk to him, times when you see how he cares for his daughter, his sister, his staff … But of course that’s also the crux of it. How much he still cares for his wife.

  She laid her head on her arms suddenly, and closed her eyes.

  They cleaned up the next day.

  Pete and Raefe spent most of the day down at the cattle yards, and, between them, Francesca and Milly dragged anything that was faintly damp out into the sunshine and mopped and polished the rest.

  Then Francesca armed herself with a pair of secateurs, a rake and a straw broom, and attacked the battered bougainvillea and all the shrubs and small trees in the garden, pruning them back to some sort of shape and piling all the broken branches into a heap with the intention of burning it as soon as it dried out sufficiently.

  Milly remonstrated with her once, telling her she was doing too; much, and out in the glare of the sun too! But she soldiered on until about four o’clock, when all of a sudden the world tilted alarmingly. and she fell over onto the grass. Milly and Jess ran out anxiously.

  ‘I told you—I told her,’ Francesca heard Milly say to someone else, and realised with an inward groan that Raefe had arrived on the scene. ‘You’ve got to take things easy in this heat—I told her.’

  Whereupon she was swung up in a pair of strong arms and Raefe was saying unemotionally, ‘There are times when you can’t tell her anything.’

  But that was mild compared to what he said to her after carrying her inside, laying her down on her bed and pointedly closing the bedroom door on Jess, Milly and Pete.

  Francesca opened her eyes cautiously and discovered that the world was no longer spinning like a top. ‘Thank heavens,’ she whispered, and tried to sit up.

  She was thrust back. ‘Don’t be a bloody fool,’ Raefe said savagely, and continued, ‘What the hell did you think you were doing? Surely you know better by now?’

  ‘I…’ Francesca licked her lips. ‘Well, I put sunscreen on and I wore a hat—’

  ‘But you obviously neglected to drink copiously— What’s the hurry, anyway?’ he added scathingly.

  Tears pricked at the back of Francesca’s eyes because that was something she’d asked herself during the day but she had been unable to come up with the answer. It struck her now, as she stared up into Raefe’s angry eyes, that she’d been motivated by an obscure desire to leave Bramble as she’d found it, serene, lovely and a bit like paradise—because she had to go, and go very soon.

  She closed her eyes on the tears and by a huge effort of will banished them. ‘I don’t know,’ she said with a shrug and forcibly summoned up tinge of amusement. ‘Once I got going it was hard to stop. I’ll be fine.’ She did sit up this time. ‘Don’t worry.’ And she started to swing her legs off the bed.

  ‘Lie back,’ he commanded grimly. ‘You’ll just stay there and do as you’re told.’ And he strode. to the door, issued some orders down the passage and returned eventually with a large glass of cloudy liquid. ‘Drink it.’

  She swallowed. ‘What is it?’

  ‘An electrolyte solution to replace all the mineral salts you’ve lost. ‘What do you think it is—arsenic?’ He put the glass into her hands.

  ‘I wouldn’t be surprised,’ she murmured, and, turning away from him, drank it down slowly. Then she handed him the glass and lay back with a sigh, closing her eyes again.

  ‘How do you feel now?’ she heard him say, in slightly less aggravated tones.

  ‘OK-’

  ‘Then just rest there; we’ll bring your dinner to you .’

  ‘Yes, sir.’

  ‘Francesca…’ he said dangerously.

  She opened her eyes indignantly. ‘Will you go away, Raefe? I feel enough of a fool as it is—you don’t have to rub it in.’

  ‘I’m not; I’m merely trying to find out exactly how you are feeling now.’

  ‘She sat up abruptly and said bitterly, ‘I’ve just told you—like an utter idiot. Isn’t that enough—what more do you want?’

  ‘Chessie?’

  They both turned to see Jess standing at the door.

  ‘Are you all right, Chessie?’ Jess advanced into the room, anxiety written clearly on her little face and her two monkeys in her arms.

  ‘Yes, sugar, I’m—I just got a bit hot. I’ll be fine.’

  ‘She’s going to rest for a bit, Jess,’ Raefe said abruptly.

  ‘Then I’ll leave you Mo and Flo so you won’t be lonely, Chessie,’ Jess said in a soothing tone. But she did more. She climbed onto the bed, hugged Francesca, arranged Mo and Flo on the pillow then climbed off and took Raefe by the hand. ‘Shall we leave her in peace?’

  Their gazes caught over Jess’s head, Raefe’s and Francesca’s, and it was obvious his daughter had discomfited him somewhat. But he had the grace to look rueful as he said gravely, ‘Of course you’re right, Jess. My apologies, Chessie.’ He ushered Jess out and closed the door softly.

  Francesca gathered Mo and Flo into her arms and found herself weeping into their fur.

  Milly brought her dinner and reassured herself that there was nothing wrong with the patient that a good sleep and plenty of liquid wouldn’t cure. She also confided that Raefe had put Jess to bed and that she herself would be sleeping next door to Jess, so that Francesca wouldn’t have to worry if she woke.

  Francesca got up after she’d eaten and had a shower. But she found herself feeling strangely lethargic, so she changed into her nightwear and got properly into bed. The house was quiet, and she was lying quietly, half asleep, when Raefe walked in.

  She blinked, sat up and looked at him enquiringly.

  ‘It’s your father,’he said, and she saw that he had the portable phone in his hand. ‘He did hear about the cyclone—belatedly. Are you up to talking to him?’

  Francesca sighed inwardly. ‘Yes. I might as well get it over with.’ She took the phone, and Raefe hesitated, then walked out.

  She took a deep breath. ‘Hi, Dad,’ she said brightly into the instrument. ‘If you’re worried I’ve been blown away, I’m still in one piece!’

  ‘And you didn’t think to let me know, you were all right,’ ‘her father barked down the line. ‘For crying out loud, Chessie—I didn’t even know there’d been a cyclone until…someone suggested that it might be an idea to check up on you a few minutes ago!’

  ‘Well, there you go—only a few min
utes of panic, which was probably better than me trying to contact you at the heart of the mayhem because there wouldn’t have been anything you could have done anyway, you see,’ she said reasonably.

  ‘Don’t take that tone to with me, Chessie,’ he growled. ‘What you don’t know is that in two days’ time I was coming to get you myself—Look, what the hell are you doing up in that God-forsaken spot anyway? I want you home—’

  ‘Dad, you know you can’t order me around any longer,’ she broke in. ‘I’ll come when I’m good and ready.’

  There was a short silence, then her father spoke in an entirely different tone. ‘Chessie, there’s something I have to tell you. My dear …’

  It must have been ten minutes after the call ended that Raefe came back. He stopped in the doorway, then swore softly and closed the door. He came over to the bed and stared down at her as she lay with her face buried, her shoulders shaking and the muffled sound of awful grief coming from the pillow.

  ‘Chessie?’ He sat down on the bed and touched her tentatively, then, when she stiffened, he gathered her into his arms, turning her over and smoothing some strands of hair. from her hot, wet face as tears streamed ceaselessly down her cheeks. ‘What is it?’ he said, rocking her as he might have rocked Jess. ‘Tell me, Chessie.’

  ‘He’s…’ She gulped and tried again. ‘He’s g-getting m-married!’

  CHAPTER NINE

  ‘IS THAT such at disaster?’ he said after a moment, still rocking her as she wept against his shoulder. ‘I mean, is it someone you hate, or think he shouldn’t be marrying?’

  ‘I don’t even know her. I’ve never laid eyes on her,’ Francesca sobbed. ‘But she’s different, he says. She’s older than the usual…ones. She’s thirty-seven and…and—’

  ‘Well, if he’s—what?—fifty-two or so, it’s just as well.’

  ‘And she’s not after his money because she’s a widow with plenty of money herself, and she’s a career woman,’ Francesca went on heedlessly, taking deep, shuddering breaths.

  ‘But that’s got to be a plus, Chessie,’ he pointed out.

  ‘You don’t understand!’ Francesca pulled herself away and glared up at him. ‘He’s finally fallen in love again. Properly. She’s having his baby!’

  ‘I’m sure…’ Raefe paused ‘ …you’ll never be overlooked in any way—financially or—’

  ‘Do you really think I care about that?’ Her wet blue eyes could still smoulder with anger, he discovered, and she ground her teeth. ‘Don’t you see? They’ll be a family and I’ll be hovering on the fringes as I’ve always done. The daughter he sent away to boarding-school and finishing school and anywhere he could send me.

  ‘He said…he tried to tell me how much he regretted all that, how he hoped to be able to make amends now. He even said that she’d reformed him—I’ll believe that when I see it. But why couldn’t he have reformed himself for me?’ she said fiercely.

  Raefe closed his eyes briefly and pulled her back into his arms. And after some minutes, when she’d visibly made a terrible effort to control herself and was lying desolate, drained and silent in his arms, he stroked her face and murmured, ‘Not the perfect end to an imperfect day.’

  She didn’t respond.

  ‘Have you made any plans, Chessie?’

  ‘Plans to go home for the wedding—or just to go away from here?’ she said huskily after an age, then shrugged. ‘Yes, as a matter of fact. Tomorrow. At least I can tell Jess honestly that I’ve been called home urgently.’

  ‘But will you go home?’

  ‘Why not?’she said listlessly. ‘I might as well get it over and done with. I don’t suppose he’ll give me a moment’s peace until I do. But after that …’ She trailed off.

  He said something under his breath, and she struggled to sit up and said wryly, although with a give-away catch in her voice that she couldn’t quite control, ‘I keep telling you this—you don’t have to

  lose any sleep over it, Raefe. So—’

  ‘And you think that’s possible, Chessie?’ he interrupted quietly.

  ‘I…Well…’ Tears started afresh in her eyes.

  ‘Because I don’t. I certainly can’t let you go on feeling like this.’ And he bent his head and started to kiss her eyelids.

  ‘That’s not fair,’ she whispered after an age, when she’d been thoroughly kissed. ‘I can’t—I don’t seem to have the strength to fight my way out of a paper bag at the moment…’

  ‘Why fight it?’ he said softly, and slid the narrow strap of her blue camisole top off her shoulder. ‘We’re two people in a certain amount of need, and we’re two people who have forged a lot of respect for each other—at least I have for you.’ He lowered his mouth to the satiny hollow at the base of her throat.

  ‘But, Raefe, there’s something I should—’

  ‘You should …?’ He raised his grey eyes to hers. ‘Chessie, if you really don’t want this, tell me now, before it’s too late. I may not be able to stop again.’

  ‘I…’ She licked her lips and felt his fingers lying just lightly on the curve of her shoulder. She was achingly conscious of both the sense of protection and the wonderful feeling of being in his arms, of the warmth and strength she’d felt once before, the rapture that came to her just at lying against him—and the promise of exquisite pleasure to come.

  I’ve resisted it for so long, she thought, but this is the first time I’ve wanted it with my heart and soul and every fibre of me; this is the first man who has made me feel this way—why not take this moment, even if I don’t know where it can lead? At least I love him, even if he doesn’t love me. At least I can have the memories …

  ‘Chessie—?’

  ‘No, Raefe, ’ she whispered, and buried her face in his shoulder briefly. ‘I do want it. Could you—just hold me for a moment, please?’

  And she couldn’t doubt the urgent need in him as he held her close in the moments before he laid her back on the bed and lay down beside her.

  ‘I always knew they’d be like this.’

  ‘Did you? Like what?’

  ‘Like perfect, full, exquisite fruit, Chessie,’ he murmured.

  She was sitting on her heels on the bed between his legs, facing him, and he’d slipped her camisole top off and was gazing at her breasts. He slid his hands round her slender waist and she raised her arms to put hers on his shoulders.

  He watched with downcast lids as she moved her hands again and her breasts moyed too, then he looked up into her eyes. ‘They have been on my mind since the day I first saw you. They-— It would be fair to say they haven’t: given me a minute’s peace since the time they appeared before my eyes in a violet bikini-top, then under a yellow swimsuit and so on.’ He brought his hands round and cupped their rose-tipped fullness.

  Francesca breathed a little raggedly. ‘Would it have helped if I’d never worn the bikini?’

  He shook his head and his eyes were wry. ‘No.’

  Her lips curved and she leant forward slightly to kiss him on the brow.

  ‘Moreover,’ he continued, and stroked her nipples, ‘they weren’t the only problem.’

  ‘No?’ she breathed, and trembled as his touch on her nipples caused a wave of sensation to flow down her body.

  ‘No—oh, no.’ He moved his hands back to her waist, lifted her so she was resting on her knees, then slid them beneath her silky blue sleep-shorts. ‘These too.’ He spread his fingers around her buttocks. ‘And your legs. All—very problematical.’

  ‘Can I tell you what I like about you?’ She linked her hands around his neck and looked down at him, her eyes wide.

  ‘Go ahead.’

  ‘Your eyes. and your hands,’ she said with a perfectly straight face, but in the blue depths of her eyes, there was a teasing little glint.

  ‘Is that so?’ His, lips twisted. ’These hands?’ And he used them to slide her shorts down to her knees.

  Her lips parted as his fingers wandered back up the front of her thighs to
touch her lightly and most intimately, while the other hand returned to her breasts. ‘You’re… Remind me not to tease you again, Raefe—that.’s almost unbearably lovely,’ she said honestly, and caught her bottom lip between her teeth as her whole body rippled with pleasure.

  ‘Chessie…’ He said her name then took her in his arms and rolled them both over so they were lying side by side. ‘You’re almost unbearably lovely,’ he added as he dealt with his own clothes then came back to her, and she caught her breath in another kind of pleasure because he was lean and strong and golden…

  What followed developed a rhythm as if they were both of one mind, one force. But, although. she knew his need and hers were mounting swiftly, he didn’t allow himself to rush. Consequently, when the moment came she faltered only briefly, a bare second, then was overtaken once more by all the feelings of joy and desire he’d aroused in her.

  She gave herself up to the ultimate sensation that claimed them together with such heart-stopping delight that it was left to Raefe to bring her back to earth, and she clung to him with the intensity of someone who’d been transported to another planet.

  Then she thanked him with tears in her eyes, and fell asleep in his arms moments later.

  He stared down at the spread of her hair on the pillow and the twisted grace and glory of her body beside his in the lamplight. Her mouth was set softly, her lashes casting shadows on the faint blue marks of exhaustion printed below her eyes. He stared down at her with his mind still reeling in the moment before he leant over and switched off the bedside lamp.

  He drew the sheet up, put one arm behind his head, with the other still cradling her to his side, and stared at the darkened ceiling with the missing piece of the puzzle now firmly in place. Was that what she’d been going to tell him? That Francesca Valentine had contrived, against all probability, to remain a virgin? He closed his eyes abruptly.

  Francesca woke slowly. The lamp was on again. It was dark outside but the first faint pre-dawn stirring of the birds could be heard. Raefe was sitting on the side of the bed with his trousers on, buttoning up his shirt.

 

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