He let out a sigh. "When I found out Laurie passed, I lost it. Losing both her and the baby, I didn't know how I was gonna go on after that. I never thought she would do what she did. At first I was so angry. I thought, how could she do something like that? How could she be so selfish? I knew she did that shit to spite me. But then...but then I know deep down, I drove her to do it. I put her through so much pain when all she did was love me. It's all my fault."
Her heart ached. The fact that he blamed himself was terrible. She knew all too well about carrying that type of burden. It was unbearable. No one deserved to feel that type of pain.
"Vance, you can't carry that burden. It's not fair to you. What she did, was her choice. Not yours."
"But I hurt her. If I didn't treat her the way I did, she would still be here. She'd still be alive."
"You know what I learned this past year? Is that you have to learn to forgive yourself. All of your mistakes, everything you've done, all the hurt that you've caused the people in your life, you have to forgive yourself for it. It's the only way you can truly heal."
Vance lowered his head and cried. She embraced him, as he released his pent up tears. It was okay to cry. He needed to let it out. He needed to let go of the pain.
After a while, he finally wiped his eyes and stared at the lake without a word.
"I'm sorry," he said.
Zara looked at him.
"For the way I treated you because of what happened to Trish. I was wrong for all the things I said and did to you. And I'm sorry for that."
"It's okay."
"No, it's not. You didn't deserve that." He stared at her. "You were right, at some point I'm gonna have to let go and move on. And I'm working on it."
She gave him a faint smile. It was good to hear that. She hoped he would.
Zara rested her head on his shoulder, gazing up at the sun's dwindling rays behind the sheet of clouds across the orange hued horizon. "She's in a better place."
"Yeah, she is."
Chapter 43
Epilogue
"Ladies and Gentlemen, for the first time as husband and wife, Mr. and Mrs. Vance and Reyna Nelson!"
The room erupted with cheers as Reyna and Rodney entered the hall gracefully, hand in hand. Zara could barely contain her tears as she cheered with joy. Her sister looked so beautiful in her elegant white dress, her burgundy hair styled into a neat bob, as the diamond studded head piece rested on the crown of her head, symbolizing her importance on her special day. Rodney complimented her well, clad in his crisp black tuxedo. They both looked as beautiful as could be.
To witness Reyna take Rodney's hand in marriage was one of the most touching moments she had ever experienced in her life. She thought about how much Reyna had grown over the years. From a budding young girl, to a grown woman who had found love and most of all, happiness.
The reception took place in a lavish banquet hall filled with 100 guests of close family, friends and acquaintances in attendance. The hall looked just as beautiful as Reyna had planned. Furnished marble floor spread across the room, as diamond chandeliers dangled from the ceilings. Light purple and white decorations adorned the hall, from the tables, balloons and floral arrangements, with the walls embellished with draping white lights, adding beauty to the whole atmosphere.
The bridal party consisted of 3 of Reyna's closest friends including Zara as the maid of honor. Each of them was dressed in lavender knee length dresses, accentuating the theme's purple and white decor. Zara made sure to look her best on her sister's wedding day, with her dreadlocks intricately cornrowed into high ponytail and make up neatly done.
"Alright, we're gonna have the bride and groom make their way to the floor for their first dance," the DJ announced.
Brian Mc Knight and Mariah Carey's, Whenever You Call began to play and Rodney led Reyna to the dance floor. All eyes were on them as they slowed danced. Zara smiled. There was such happiness radiating from them, as they embraced each other in bliss. They truly were love personified.
"We're gonna ask the rest of the wedding party to join in as well," The DJ spoke.
Soon after, the wedding party made their way to the floor, joining in on the dance. When Zara met Vance’s gaze across the table, she blushed. He got up from his seat and made his way toward her.
"May, I have this dance ma'am?"
Her pulse raced at his silky baritone. Vance licked his lips, his hand extended to hers with a charming smile. She swooned at how damn gorgeous he looked in his black tuxedo and sharp leather shoes. His neatly cut fade, induced with those deep waves she loved, as well as his trimmed goatee enriched his sophisticated look. Damn, this man was too fine for his own good.
"Yes you may sir,” she played along, his formalities making her grin. She placed her hand in his and he led her to the dance floor.
Placing his arm around her waist, he brought her close. She wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head against his shoulder, inhaling the intoxicating scent of his cologne.
"How am I doing?" Vance whispered.
"Hmm?" Zara looked at him.
"With the dancing, I'm doin' okay?"
She smiled. "Yeah. Much better."
He really was. After weeks of trying to teach him how to slow dance in preparation for this day, it had been a tedious task teaching him how not to step on her feet, while dancing on beat. She could definitely see some improvement and she was proud of him.
"I'm just happy you're not stepping on my feet this time," she teased.
"Oh you got jokes."
She grinned, before resting her head on his shoulder. Closing her eyes, Zara basked in bliss as they slow danced to the smooth music. In that moment, no one else seemed to exist in the world but them.
"I never got to thank you," Vance spoke.
She lifted her head, meeting his gaze. "Thank me for what?"
"For just being there for me these past few months. I appreciate it."
Her heart warmed. If he only knew how much it meant just having him in her life. Over the past 5 months, they had become close friends. Instead of complicating their relationship with lust and sex like they had done in the past, they decided to build on their friendship first. They helped each other build the broken pieces of their lives, and leaned on each other during their lowest days.
Just having Vance back in her life meant the world to her. She found herself smiling and laughing more, and most of all, enjoying the beauty of life instead of the pain it entailed. Now, 9 months sober, her mind was much clearer than it had ever been. Each day was a struggle, but she remembered how much she lost due to drugs, and she vowed to never get to that point again. She was now a full time dance teacher at the center. She enjoyed every bit of it, and there was nothing else she would rather do. She even had hopes of building her own dance studio, one day. That would be her dream. And with strength and resilience, Zara was certain she could do it.
She had come a long way. From a homeless drug addict living on the streets, to now a sober, working young woman with a better outlook on life. Zara never thought she would get to this point. But over the years, life had a way of surprising her in ways she never imagined.
"Well, that's what friends are for," Zara finally spoke.
He stared at her for a while, the intensity of his dark brown eyes sending butterflies in her stomach. He always had that effect on her.
"What If I want us to be more than that?"
Zara stopped dancing.
"What?" she whispered.
"What if I said, I want us to be more than friends? What if I want us to be together?"
Taken aback, she wondered if he was joking. But the seriousness in his voice and in his stare, told her otherwise. Her heart thumping in her chest, she mustered up the words to speak.
"I-is that what you really want?"
"Yeah, it is." He softly rubbed her face. "This year's taught me a lot, that tomorrow's not promised. And that we gotta cherish the ones in our life before it's too late
. I know we've been through a lot. It's been a tough road for both of us, but we're still here. We made it through. And we deserve to be happy this time. And the only way I'm happy is if I'm with you."
Her breath left her lips.
"But what about the past...and everything?"
"The past is the past. We're here now. And I wanna be with you." He placed a finger on her chin. "I love you, Zara."
Her heart swelled with emotions. He...loved her?
"I love you too."
They kissed passionately. Zara's eyes filled with tears. She thought about how far they had come. All the struggles they endured, all the pain that engulfed their lives. They had been hurt, and been broken, but with strength they had survived it all, only to find love in each other.
And for that, it was all worth it.
A chorus of ‘awws’ filled the crowd, and they pulled back, realizing they had caused a scene. Zara blushed.
“It’s about damn time,” Reyna whispered to them.
Zara and Vance laughed, before meeting each other’s gaze. Unable to resist, Zara kissed his lips again. Damn she loved this man.
The song, This is How We Do It suddenly broke the scene, and cheers erupted from the crowd. The DJ announced that the guests make their way to the floor, and within instant, the floor filled with people dancing along to the song. Zara smiled at Vance, remembering the first time they danced together.
“It’s your song,” Zara teased.
“Yeah I know.” He licked his lips, adjusting his tie in a boastful manner. She smirked at how damn sexy he was even with his cocky ways and all. “You ready, girl?”
“Yeah, daddy. Show ‘em how it’s done,” she smirked.
He stepped back and swayed his body side to side. Within seconds, he broke out into the ‘running man’ dance, and Zara burst into laughter.
Bio
Taisha Ryan is a writer and artist from New York. Writing has been her passion since the age of 12, allowing her to express her wild imagination through words. Since then, Taisha has written short stories, novels, poems, songs, and screenplays. In March 2014, she published her debut novel, Cuffed. She currently lives in Long Island, NY where she works with autistic children as a direct care counselor, while also focusing on attaining her MSW degree. Look out for more of her projects in the future!
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Email: [email protected]
Twitter: twitter.com/IamMissTai
Thanks for reading.
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