by Ed Lacy
“Family?” she repeated, as though she didn't understand me. She was sitting on one of the dirty chairs, slowly smoking a cigarette.
“No father, mother, sisters or brothers?” I asked, feeling silly.
“No. I have no one.”
“And no money? Doesn't seem like Hank to leave you...” I stopped. It was an asinine remark... Hank hadn't 'planned' to leave her.
“No money—nothing,” she said calmly.
“I'll try to find you a job. Can you type?”
“Type?”
“You know, work a typewriter.” I went through the motions of typing. I felt excited—a little rattled.
“I have seen such machines. I cannot work them. I am not bright. Hank, he did not tell you that?”
“I only saw Hank once since he came home,” I said, trying to figure the drawl and the broken English. “Mrs. Conroy—Lee .—I want to help you. Suppose for the next few months, till you get on your feet, I give you some money? Say... fifty a week.”
“Fifty doll-ars?” Lee said, showing some interest. “You are most kind, Herr...?”
“George.”
“George.” She put a lot on the 'G.' “So you will help me?”
“Of course. I'm sure something will work out—in a few weeks.”
“And you will give me money? Fifty dollars?”
I said, “Yes, I told you that.”
“And you will stay here?” Lee asked, staring at me blankly.
“Oh, no. You don't understand. I'll pay your rent, give you some money each week until you're settled and...”
“You promise fifty dollars.”
“Yes, fifty dollars,” I said, all mixed up.
She stood up slowly, making me aware of her supple body. She knocked the ash from her cigarette on the floor, came over to me. It was a novelty to be able to look into a girl's eyes—not have to look down at her. She drawled, “Honey, you have a place?”
I nodded and the heavy sweaty odor of her was like a sickeningly thick perfume.
“Then Lee go with you. Why you pay money here and for your own rooms?”
“No. Wait—don't get me wrong, I'm doing this as Hank's friend—and as your friend. You don't have to... I mean, my God this is all...”
“Honey, I want to go with you,” Lee said and put her face close to mine. She closed her eyes and pouted her lips to be kissed—all a childish mixture of the worst corny acting I'd ever seen.
She stood like that for a second, then I put my arms around her hard shoulders, kissed her fiercely, and the very physical bigness of her made me feel like a kid. It seemed as if I'd never wanted a woman as much as I wanted her.
We walked into the bedroom. (And I wouldn't have been too surprised if she had carried me in there.) The bed was a frightful mess: the sheets almost gray, shoe marks and crumbs all over the bed, and stains and other marks I didn't dare think about. I was about to tell her we could go to my apartment, but she stripped quickly and there wasn't any time for words.
Later, I insisted we go to my place—the dirty bed was beginning to worry me by then. Lee didn't say anything. She put on her dress and while I got into my clothes, she went through the rooms, picking up little packages and things from under a bureau scarf, out of drawers. She shoved these packages into a large leather pocketbook, stood by the door, waiting for me. I handed her a sweater—to cover the tattoo on her arm—and we went out. She never even locked the door.
In the cab I thought I heard the rattle of coins in her bag—a great many coins—but it didn't mean anything to me.
She glanced casually around my house, didn't make any comment. I took great delight in giving her a bath, took a shower myself, and we went to bed.
I'd never call Lee a passionate woman, but she certainly was extremely capable.
Chapter 4
I AWOKE AT nine the next morning and had to rush. Lee was sprawled across the bed, sleeping heavily, and she certainly was the largest and best-shaped woman I'd ever seen. I dressed and showered quickly, and the sight of this Amazon in my bed pleased me. Without thinking it out very much, I was impressed with my own cleverness—I was keeping Lee with her own money!
I left a note that I'd be home by six, told her where to shop, and put a five-dollar bill beside the note. I took a cab to the office, didn't have time to stop for my scratch sheet or even breakfast. I felt in top spirits.
Shortly before noon I called the house, but there wasn't any answer. I supposed Lee was out shopping for supper. Joe lunched with me, was full of chatter about the television set Walt had bought, and what a sharp character the kid was. “Believe me, Georgie, that kid has something on the ball. Army was the best thing in the world for him. Why he even hit the daily double Saturday—only paid thirty-four bucks, but that's some picking: He's looking the package-store deal over carefully. Seems not all these liquor stores are making dough. And he's going to school—one night a week—Columbia. Taking an extension course in the principles of merchandising, so he can run his store right. And you should see the dolls he has up to the house. Fact is, I'm spending most of my nights in the Turkish baths. Kid wants me to share his dolls, but I don't think that's right. Although some of them are real fine sex-boats. How about going to the baths with me tonight?”
“Sorry, I'm busy.”
Joe gave me a shrewd look. “Oh—Flo back again?”
I shook my head. “Another girl. Talk about sex-boats, this one's a whole fleet.” I called for the check.
Joe looked at me pop-eyed. “Tell poppa all about...”
“Some other time, perhaps,” I said, as the waiter came over.
During the afternoon I kept thinking about the way I'd left her sprawled across the bed. I was too restless to work, so I told Harvey I had a headache, took off. I called the house again and there wasn't any answer.
I took a cab to her place on 29th Street. She had left the door unlocked and I went in. The place was so dirty and smelled so badly, I nearly gave up. I wondered if Lee had been too grief-stricken to do any housework, although she hadn't been too deep in sorrow to sleep with me. As I looked around the apartment I was nearly overcome with a feeling of guilt: with poor Hank dead a month I already had his money and his wife. But it wasn't any of my doing—he had given me the money—to hold—and Lee had been the one to volunteer herself.
There wasn't much in the flat, the furniture scratched and stained. I went through her closet and drawers, gathered her clothes. (There were a few suits—Hank's no doubt—that gave me quite a start.) I took whatever clothes she had that weren't too dirty or torn. She didn't have much, there wasn't a decent pair of stockings, for instance, nor did I see any heavy or winter coats. I made a bundle of her stinking clothes and as I started out of the apartment, I almost walked into a little rat-faced man standing in the hallway. He had on work clothes and nodded at the stuff in my arms, asked, “What you doing here, mister?”
His voice was mild and squeaky, but when I tried to walk past him, he blocked the way, said, “I'm the super of the house. They—she—owes rent... last month.”
“I'm not sure Mrs. Conroy wants to keep the apartment any longer.”
He pushed back his battered felt hat, rubbed his thin hair.
“Have to talk to the agent about that. They—she—has a lease.”
I rested the clothes on the stairway railing, pulled a ten-dollar bill out of my pocket. “Look, if you don't hear from Mrs. Conroy within the next week, evict her. And forget you ever saw me.” I slipped him the ten.
He hesitated a moment, pocketed the bill. “You her brother?”
“No. I'm a friend of the Conroys. All this has been a severe shock to her, naturally, and Mrs. Conroy may leave the city. But forget you saw me.”
“It's okay with me, mister. But the agent will want last month's rent and you can't break a lease by...”
“Stop it. Clean and paint the place, fix up the furniture a little, and the agent will get a couple hundred under the table—again, like he di
d from the Conroys. But remember, wait a week, in case Mrs. Conroy changes her mind.”
As I went down the stairs I heard him mumble. “Okay with me, but them people sure caused us plenty trouble...”
I took a cab uptown and the sour smell of her things made me want her. I left the clothes in a dry-cleaning place on the corner, brushed myself off, and walked over to the house. Slob was sitting outside and I picked him up as I unlocked the door, said, “What's the matter, boy, bit shocked at my having a girl around?”
Inside, he jumped out of my hands, made for the kitchen. I called out, “Lee? Lee?” but there wasn't any answer. For a moment I had the uncomfortable feeling that she had left me. But the night before I had undressed her in the living room, and her dress was still across the couch, her sweater on the floor where she had dropped it, and in the bathroom doorway I could see her shoes. I called her name again, ran into the bedroom.
She was sprawled across the bed, and I swear that she hadn't moved an inch since I'd left her in the morning. She was staring up at the ceiling, as if in deep thought, didn't even look at me. My note was still on the night table, but the five dollar bill was gone.
I sat on the bed, stroked her hard thigh. “Hello, Lee honey. Haven't you been out?”
She didn't answer, still examined the ceiling.
“Anything wrong? I phoned twice but you must have been out...” I stopped. Remembering her clothes in the living room, I damn well knew she hadn't left the house.
She didn't pay the slightest attention to me and I sat like that for a moment, wondering what I'd done. Perhaps she felt guilty about spending the night with her dead husband's best friend. Perhaps... I said, “I was down to your place, put your clothes in the cleaners. You'll have to decide if you want to keep the apartment. The janitor was asking about it.” This didn't get a rise out of her, and for want of something more to say, I asked, “Would you like to eat?”
She sat up, stared at me. I noticed she'd been smoking in bed—there were ashes and a few crushed, blackened butts on the sheet beneath her. She said, “Ja, essen.”
“What? Look, are you hungry?”
“Yes. I am very hungry,” she said, like a kid in an elocution class.
She was looking at me, but in an odd manner, as though I wasn't there.
I stood up. “Why didn't you go out and shop?”
She didn't answer and I playfully reached down and shook her. With cat speed she moved away from me, to the other side of the bed, her eyes alert, watching me. When she moved I saw all her muscles and I'll swear she was actually muscle-bound.
I sat down on a chair, didn't talk for a minute. Then I asked, “Lee, is something the matter? Why didn't you get up? Why didn't you shop?”
She relaxed, stretched with sensuous ease on the bed, her big body inviting. She giggled.
“What's the joke?”
She said, “Where is the money?”
“What money?”
“You said fifty dollars. I find only this.” The drawl was back in her voice. She reached under a pillow, waved the five spot I'd left in the morning.
“I'll give you the money tomorrow. I have to go to the bank. And you'll need clothes, I'll buy a wardrobe,”
She looked puzzled, as if she didn't understand a word I said. I got up again. “Look, bathe and dress, I'll shop.” I reached over for the five dollars, but she coyly pulled away, put the bill under her. I was too hungry to play, so I said, “Get dressed,” and went out. In her dirty dress I didn't want to be seen with her in any restaurant. As I walked down the street, Henderson waved to me from his window.
I bought a lot of food and when I returned she was still in bed. I got angry, said, “For Christ sakes, get up and cook.”
“Cook?” she repeated, as if mocking me. She shook her head. “Lee not bright—no cook.”
“Oh, save the baby talk.” I took off my coat and tie, went into the kitchen. I gave Slob some milk and meat, made ham and eggs for supper. The smell of food aroused Lee. She stood in the doorway, watching me, still in the nude. She looked like a heavyweight champion with breasts.
I pointed to her clothes in the living room, then to the bathroom. “Wash and dress—if you want to eat.”
Like a child, she turned and did as I told her, although she didn't put on her shoes. At that moment I realized what I was up against. If I had been smart (or if I hadn't been so damn sure I was smart), I would have rushed her back to her place, given her the seven thousand, and washed my hands of the whole mess. Only it isn't easy to put that kind of money or her kind of body out of your life.
We ate in silence and when she finished she picked up Slob, began to stroke him with her big hands. He switched his tail nervously, finally jumped out of her hands, and up and out of the kitchen window. I lit a cigarette for her, took out my pipe, and asked, “Will you wash the dishes?”
She sat there, elbows on the kitchen table, watching the smoke she was blowing out of her odd nose. Finally I got up, stacked the dishes in the sink, washed them. All she did was stare at the ceiling, knock her ashes on the floor. I swept up the living room, cleaned up the bedroom, changed the linen, washed the bathroom. All the time she sat in the kitchen. I went back there, pointed to the ashes on the floor, the butt she had crushed on the table. “Look, Lee, I don't know what this all means, but I won't live in a pig-sty. Pick that up.” I sounded exactly like a father scolding his little girl.
She picked up the ashes and butt, dropped them in the sink instead of the garbage pail. I gave up, went into the living room and turned on the radio. She came in, sat opposite me. She didn't have a thing on except her dress, and just looking at her, her huge bare feet, annoyed me. To get a rise from her, I said, “Damn it, stop lounging around like a big whore.”
The words had absolutely no effect on her and I wondered if she was deaf. But I could tell she was listening to the music on the radio. I went over and shook her. “Did you hear what I said?”
She looked up at me, her face blank. When I shook her again she smiled, put her strong arms around me, pulled me down to her. I was aware only of her breasts gently digging into my chest.
Whatever was wrong with her, she knew what I wanted most.
I looked at my watch and it was absurd being in bed at six o'clock. As usual, she was staring at nothing, at the ceiling. I got up, poured myself a good hooker, asked if she wanted one.
She said, “Yes,” and I told her to get out of bed and get it. She didn't move and I put the bottle away. I sat down and tried to think. Hank and Marion had called her crazy and I'd only thought it a figure of speech. There was no doubt she was backward, to put it mildly, and God knows where or why Hank had taken up with her.
I knew I should get rid of her, yet I couldn't. I had this silly idea I was in the driver's seat—I was keeping her with her own money. That struck me as such a hell of a clever idea, I was so pleased with it, I simply couldn't give it up. Then of course there was the added point of her wonderful body.
I gave her all sorts of crazy excuses: she was merely in a mood, maybe she was recovering from a long binge, maybe she was ashamed of living with me... maybe... maybe. I gave up. But I was seriously considering getting rid of her, at the moment, but what followed changed all that.
I put on my sweat suit, tap shoes, went downstairs to dance. I had to do something to relax. I'd danced through two Earl Hines' records, was in the midst of a corny soft shoe dance to Me and My Shadow, when I noticed her sitting on the steps, watching me with great interest. She had my bedroom slippers half on her wide feet.
I asked if she wanted to dance and she said, “I know Pistol-Packing Mama and song—Deep in the Heart of Texas,” and she began to sing in a horrible monotone and clap her heavy hands.
I said, “Good God,” and burst out laughing. She smiled and I took her in my arms and started dancing. She was very awkward and after stumbling around for a moment, I left her and danced solo. The record changed to one of Charlie Barnet's loud and fast-number
s, and as I whirled around the room, the rhythm suddenly got her. She kicked off my slippers and started to dance.
Her movements were clumsy, and lacking in any grace or smoothness, yet there was something fierce and savage and original about them. Mostly she seemed to fling herself around the room, dancing with her arms and shoulders, and bumping a good deal—like an inept burlesque dancer. But there was no doubt she felt the movements, and there was a certain charm to their very simplicity. I danced around her, doing whatever I felt like.