by J. L. Weil
His lips curled. “Can you believe I haven’t declared a major yet?”
“Are you kidding? I am the queen of indecision lately.”
He chuckled.
I walked into the family room, fumbling with my hands. “So um, how did you want to do this?”
He stood in front of me so I had to bend my neck to see his face. “Tell me what you can do?”
That was easy. “Pretty much nothing.”
He wasn’t put off very easily. “Good, a clean slate.”
That was one way of looking at it. His optimism was staggering, considering who he was teaching. He must have seen the doubt in my eyes. It was evident how much self-confidence I lacked.
“Come on,” he encouraged smiling. “Let’s see what you got.”
I looked at him blankly.
“Can you tap into the center of your energy?” he asked, finally realizing I wasn’t doing anything.
That was about the only thing I could do and had practiced. I was more aware of the tingles flowing in my veins. I might not be able to always control it, but at least I recognized it for what it was.
Magic.
I nodded. “I can almost always find it now. It’s more of knowing what to do with it.”
“Command it.”
He made it sound so simple, like riding a bike. “Easier said than done.”
“It is,” he promised, “once you know what you are doing. One of the first things I learned was levitation. Want to give it a go?”
“Why not?” I said dryly.
He scanned around the room, looking for what I assumed was something safe to levitate. His gaze landed on an item sitting on the fireplace mantel. Walking in front of the stone hearth, he said. “This will work.”
The item of choice was an antique glass vase. I let out a loud gasp as he plucked it off the mantel. It had been part of the house since before my grandma had lived here. No doubt it was a priceless family heirloom, and I wasn’t about to play Jeanie in a bottle with it. “You’ve lost your mind. My aunt would kill me if I broke that.”
“Exactly the point. It is better if the item has importance. That way there is less a chance of you fumbling the spell.”
His logic sounded like utter BS to me, especially if I failed. The odds of his theory working on me were probably one in a gazillion. I had a bad feeling about this, and it sat unsettled in the bottom of my stomach. It could have been just my nerves, but I wanted so badly to be able to control this so-called gift, and I was tired of the outbursts.
“You better not be wrong about this,” I warned him, narrowing my eyes to slivers.
He hardly batted an eye at my not-so-sunny disposition. “Trust me.”
Trust him. The words echoed in my head. Then there was that. Trust. How much did I really trust Lukas? At one time, I would have said unequivocally. Now, I wasn’t so…confident in that trust.
“Fine,” I agreed, shoving my hands in my pocket. “The vase it is, but I am totally holding you responsible if anything happens to it.”
“Deal.”
I didn’t like the stupid grin on his face. It was too charming. “You’re sure I can do this?”
“Positive…well, pretty positive.”
I shot lasers at him with my violet eyes, losing a notch of my assurance.
“Don’t worry,” he rushed to add before being seared by my laser beams. “I can fix whatever goes wrong. That’s a promise.”
His reassurance wasn’t enough to smooth over my worries. Someday I was going to work on my self-confidence. Someday in the distant future—today I was going to just try and not fry my own ass. “Bring it on,” I said in a voice both sweet and menacing.
He smiled, diving right into it. “I want you to put all your concentration into that vase. Then I want you to picture it moving, floating through the air toward you. Let the source of your energy guide it.”
I took a deep breath, then another, and closed my eyes. Okay, all I had to do was move it to me. Easy peasy. Reaching inside to the sweet spot of magic, I welcomed the sensation that spread through me. It was amazing how just accepting what lived within me had suddenly become such a part of me.
There were really no words to describe the feelings. It was empowerment, a perfect blend of strength and spirit. I could lose my head, like the most potent drugs on the planet, but without the addiction. It was nearly as awe-inspiring as kissing Gavin.
I was a different person. Maybe not different per se, but a super-enhanced me.
I savored the awareness as it traveled through me—consuming me. I could feel it coursing from head-to-toe. When I opened my eyes, I was looking into Lukas’s face. He was watching me, and I could see surprise and something more shining in his emerald eyes.
He nodded once, encouraging me to move forward and not lose my grip. I focused intently on the very breakable crystal vase and pictured it moving into the air, floating effortlessly into my waiting, sweaty hands. With my luck, it would slip right from my grasp the second I clutched it.
Nothing happened.
I tried harder. And harder. Lines of concentration stretched across my forehead, but the vase didn’t so much as whisper a movement. My head was starting to throb and the buildup of energy inside of me was bursting to be released, to the point that it was becoming painful.
I was about to concede defeat when shit hit the fan.
Like the sound of a hurricane, pressure built around the walls of my house, creaking and squeaking in a funny way. Then, as if it had reached its maximum, all the windows on the first floor shattered into lethal confetti. Glass rained down over Lukas and I from all directions, and my hands flew to cover covered my head.
Sweet baby Jesus, please let this be a horrible nightmare.
But nothing I could do or say would change what my eyes were seeing. We stood frozen. I couldn’t say what was going through Lukas’s head, but in mine it sounded like a string of very colorful swear words.
“Holy shit!” I gasped. I was in so much trouble. How was I going to explain this to my aunt? It was bad enough that I had to patch a hole in my bedroom wall, but this…
“It might be safer if we practiced in your dreams,” Lukas said, brushing diamonds of glass off his shoulders and shaking it out of his hair.
He was joking, trying to lighten the situation, but I was having none of it. I hadn’t moved. I was too afraid to even blink. What an utter disaster.
I felt dejected.
I felt defeated.
I felt like a failure.
“Brianna,” he called my name, but I was unresponsive. “Brianna!” he said again more forceful. “I can fix this.” He did a wavy hand thingy, eyes glowing like polished glass in the sun. As quickly as I had destroyed the windows, he had them repaired, as if it had never happened.
I blinked.
I should be feeling relieved, but I wasn’t. I felt hazardous—a danger to everyone around me.
Stepping in front of me, he grabbed both my shoulders. “This isn’t as bad as it looks. You think every witch doesn’t have a few slips here or there? It’s how we learn, from our mistakes.”
“I don’t think I qualify as your average witch.”
His lips curled. “Maybe not, but you’re still allowed mistakes.”
“And if those mistakes cost lives? Then what?” My cheeks heated as I argued in frustration.
He wasn’t the least put off by my bad attitude. “That’s why you can’t give up. You have got to keep practicing. You’ll get it. Everything will one day click into place.”
“If I keep practicing like this, I won’t have a house to live in.”
He snickered. “It’s not power you lack, that’s for sure. That wasn’t even at full strength.”
He so wasn’t helping. I gave him a wry look. “Funny.”
“Don’t discredit yourself so easily. You can do this. Try again,” he advised.
Too late. I failed. Again.
I had to be the worst witch in the history of t
ime.
Even my crestfallen expression didn’t deteriorate Lukas. “This time with a little less…enthusiasm,” he suggested.
I shook my head. “It’s your death sentence, buddy.”
“I’ll take my chances on you,” he said, squeezing my shoulder.
I stared at him, dumbfounded. So be it. Lukas had faith in me; the least I could do was give it one more shot. If I leveled the house, so be it.
Nodding, I backed up, putting some space between us. The erratic tingles gathered inside me. This time, I didn’t put so much effort into it. I relaxed and tried not to overthink what I was supposed to do.
Then, almost like a trick, it happened. The crystal vase slowly hovered in the air over the fireplace mantel. It shimmered in time and space.
Hope sparked.
I could feel Lukas behind me holding his breath—waiting. That made two of us. With careful precision, I kept a steady hold on the energy flowing from me as it guided the precious vase across the room and safely into my slightly shaking hands.
I took a moment to wallow in pure giddiness. Warmth and pride flooded me. Putting the vase safely back in its place on the fireplace mantel, I turned and jumped into Lukas’s waiting arms. “I did it!” I squealed, grinning like a fool.
He spun me in the air, before setting me back on me feet. “Hell, yeah! I told you. It was in you the whole time.”
“That felt amazing,” I gushed. It helped take my mind off other things.
Gavin.
At the thought his name, a tidal wave of emotions came roaring inside me. This was the kind of thing I’d imagined sharing with him. Disappointment laced through the excitement. Lukas noticed my immediate distraction. How could he not? My mind was having a hard time staying with the high of my accomplishment and swiftly tumbled down, crashing. This strife between Gavin and I was affecting my abilities, affecting my life.
“Does your boyfriend know that I’m helping you?” he asked, interrupting my wandering mind. His warm fingers brushed aside a strand of hair that had fallen over my face.
“No,” I replied, hearing the sadness in my voice. Hard to tell him when he was not talking to me. “He’s not really my boyfriend, technically.”
“Uh, you could have fooled me.”
I sighed, tired and cranky. Doing magic always sucked the life out of me. “Sorry, I’m such shitty company right now. It’s been a long week. I thought this would…help.”
“It will help. What you need is somewhere to throw all the emotion you’re feeling. There is no better way than in magic.”
“At least one of us thinks so. I seem to be crying more than not the last few days,” I revealed with more vulnerability than I meant to. There was always something about him that made me pour my heart out
“The skies have been filled with amethyst tears.” He wiped away a single tear that streaked down my cheek.
More than he knew. I was probably responsible for every storm we had had the last few days.
Lukas gave me a sincere smile. “I think you deserve a break. What you need is a change in scenery. Want to grab dinner?” he asked, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. And maybe it was normal, but somehow I felt like I would be betraying Gavin.
I was speechless. A date? Is that what he was asking? Or was I just jumping to all kinds of crazy assumptions?
He held up both hands. “No strings attached.”
I rolled the idea around in my head, as I left him hanging. What I really wanted was just a night to forget.
Forget who I was.
Forget what I was.
Forget my sorrow.
Before I could second guess myself or change my mind, I replied with a partial smile, “Sure, why not.” Two friends having dinner; it didn’t have to be any more than just that. Right? He said “no strings attached.”
“Do you like Italian?” he asked, grinning ear-to-ear. His dimples winked on both cheeks. He was just so damn charming. Any girl in the world would be a puddle at his feet.
So why wasn’t I? He was what dreams where made of, after all.
I tried to return his smile, but only managed a fraction of his eagerness. I couldn’t fake it. Even though I had said yes, inside guilt gnawed at me. “Who doesn’t like a little Italian?” I replied.
Chapter 9
IT SEEMED LIKE WE DROVE forever to get to the nearest Olive Garden. In reality, it probably wasn’t that far, but there weren’t a large number of Italian dining options in Holly Ridge.
My cheeks were flushed as I sat across the booth from Lukas. It had nothing to do with the fireplace beside our table and everything to do with him staring at me so intently. With the dim lighting, this suddenly seemed more intimate than I had bargained. It was supposed to be innocent, just two friends.
Who was I kidding? Friends don’t swap spit.
In our defense, it had only been once, and in a dream. I wasn’t sure that even counted. Lukas and I weren’t just friends. What we had experienced in my dreams forged a weird bond that I didn’t know how to explain. And now, I didn’t know how to act around him. Things weren’t the same as they were in my dreams.
“So how long is this…strange vibe we have going to last between us?” he asked, flashing those lethal dimples at me. Leave it to Lukas to just lay it all there on the table.
I exhaled and smiled, trying to relieve the tension in my shoulders. “I’m glad it’s not just me. It’s so strange still seeing in the real world. My mind doesn’t seem to be able to keep up with what my eyes see.”
“Understandable. I look at you, and I can’t believe how much more beautiful you are in person.”
That did it. My cheeks deepened, and I tucked my hair behind my ear. I wasn’t the best at receiving compliments, and luckily, our server saved me.
We placed our orders, and I used that short time to regain some of my lost composure. The conversation moved to a less awkward topic. I couldn’t have been more grateful.
“Have you thought about what you’re going to do after high school? What school you would like to attend?” His magnetic eyes shimmered under the dim glow of candles.
I shook my dark head, fiddling with the moonstone and amethyst at my neck. “School has been the furthest thing from my mind.” And my grades were starting to show it.
“I know a really great school…” He let his words linger in the air. We both knew he was talking about his college. Like a seasoned frat boy, he tried to sweeten the proposal. “Just think how convenient it would be to practice magic, and I could always use someone to spar with. There aren’t many witches on campus, so we would be doing each other a favor.”
Chewing on my lip, I considered what he said. Before magic entered my life, University of NC had been my school of choice. Now…I wasn’t so sure I even wanted to go to college. “I’ll think about.” It was the best I could do for now. I couldn’t commit to anything while my life was so jumbled and unsteady.
Lukas grinned, like he’d won a small victory. “That’s better than no. And in the meantime, I will take every opportunity to convince you.”
Wonderful. I’d just opened a can of worms.
Our food arrived and the air wafted with parmesan and tomatoes. Lukas dug right in. I, on the other hand, pushed my food around the plate in circles. I was having fun, but there was a strange tug in my belly. Being here with Lukas was nice, normal even, but…
He cleared his throat, pausing between shoveling monstrous bites of meatball in his mouth. “So this thing with…” he paused. “What’s his name again?”
I looked up from my half-eaten plate of noodles, meeting his quizzical gaze. There was just the slightest light to them. He’d been watching me aimlessly play with my food. We both knew he remembered his name. “Gavin,” I supplied.
He scratched his chin. “Right. This thing with Gavin is seriously bugging you.”
I sighed heavily, leaning my elbows on the table. “To say the least.”
“Do you want to talk about i
t?”
I made a face. “I don’t want to spoil dinner.”
“It might make you feel better,” he countered, dangling the option like the last serving of tiramisu.
True, although I wasn’t sure he was actually the person to be my sounding board. But really, who else did I have? My aunt, Tori, and Austin were out of the question, for obvious reasons. Sophie was his sister, and I could probably talk to her, yet it felt wrong. Lukas might be the only person out there.
But he probably had an agenda.
I gave in. “Let’s just say that he didn’t take it well when he learned I’d met the guy in my dreams.”
He grinned wolfishly. “Clever. I like the sound of that. Hopefully, it didn’t come out just so.”
I snorted. “Hardly, but no matter how you twist it, I still deceived him. I should have told him the truth much sooner than I did, and in the process, I hurt him.” I slumped against my seat, food forgotten. This was not making me feel better.
“So what happened when you told him? Did he get mad at you?” A hint of irritation crinkled at the corner of his eyes.
I twirled my straw. “Something like that. I haven’t talk to him since the night I told him. He’s avoiding me like I’m carrying a deadly disease.”
“Then he’s an idiot.” His eyes flashed.
I shifted in my seat. “It’s not like that.”
He arched a brow, clearly not believing me. “What makes you so positive? He hasn’t called you. He’s been avoiding you.”
I shrugged. How could I make him understand that what was between Gavin and me ran deeper than just a teenage crush? It was more. There was some invisible thread stringing us together. “I can’t explain it.”
His gaze held mine with a glowing tint. “That’s crap, and you know it.”
Doubt bubbled up. Did I? I wasn’t so sure anymore.
Crossing his arms he declared, “He sounds like an asshole.”
“He’s not, really. Actually, he’s been nothing but supportive,” I defended.
“That may be, but if I were him, I wouldn’t have walked away so easily.” There was passion and anger in his words.
Gulping, I believed him. The change in his eyes was swift, scarily so. I would be lying to myself if I didn’t admit that there was a fraction of fear inside me. He must have noticed it, because a moment later he banked that fire, and sighed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound so harsh.”