by Karly Lane
Lavinia’s laugh, much like Hadley’s, had a melodious ring to it and she gave a wave of her fingers as she continued on her way.
‘Can you believe my parents still do this every year?’ Hadley said with a chuckle and a shake of her head.
‘It’s tradition,’ Ollie shrugged. ‘They’ve been doing it for as long as I can remember.’
‘I know. But I’m a bit worried: I heard Dad suggesting it might be time to pass the Santa suit down to the next generation. I don’t think I’m ready for that kind of responsibility.’
‘Surely Linc or Griff will get it before you?’
‘Do you honestly see either of my brothers dressing up as Santa? Seriously?’ she added dryly, and Ollie gave a grunt. She had a point.
‘I don’t think your mum will be willing to give it up anytime soon.’ Lavinia Callahan was Christmas personified. The house was decorated to within an inch of its life, and as much as Bob Callahan grumbled about it, Ollie was pretty sure he got just as big a kick out of the whole thing as his wife did.
He noticed Harmony inside and looked back down at Hadley. ‘How’re things with your sister?’
Hadley shrugged. ‘We’ve been civil. She’s been pretty quiet. Mum and Dad are worried about her. They had a bit of a chat when she first got here.’
‘No sign of mentioning Mitch?’
‘No,’ she said bluntly. ‘Doesn’t seem she’s planning on telling them too soon.’
‘Buggered if I know how she can live with something like that. Secrets always backfire on you.’ The fact that this particular secret stood to hurt so many people once it was out of the bag only made the waiting worse. Maybe Harmony and Mitch had a plan; maybe they would contrive some cock-and-bull story about getting together after Mitch’s divorce was official in a few more months—who knew—but it didn’t sit well with him. He couldn’t stand dishonesty in a person.
‘I’m staying out of it. This is their problem to deal with. All I know is I’m the happiest I’ve been in a long time and I’m not going to let the two of them ruin it for me.’
Ollie smiled into her blue eyes and felt his heart clench tightly. Right here, in this very moment, surrounded by friends and family and holding this woman he’d loved for most of his life in his arms, he had everything he could ever want. The realisation shook him.
He was about to tell Hadley and opened his mouth to do so but there was a call for everyone to take a seat at the table and the moment was lost in good-natured barging and hustling. He wasn’t sure what he was going to have to do to make this thing work, but he knew, whatever it took, he’d do it.
Hadley walked into the kitchen carrying dirty plates and saw her mother and two brothers deep in conversation. She paused, getting ready to walk back outside, but her mother stopped her. ‘Hadley. Maybe you can shed some light on this.’
Her mother’s tone instantly set her on high alert.
‘Linc was just bringing up the fact he’s noticed Harmony’s not herself. See, it’s not just me. Do you have any idea what’s going on?’
‘She doesn’t tell me anything,’ Hadley hedged.
‘Well, maybe it’s time I brought her in here and we got to the bottom of this,’ Lavinia said firmly.
‘No,’ Hadley said quickly, drawing strange glances from her mother and eldest brother. She instantly sent Griff a pleading glance and saw his wary expression. He’d wanted to come clean about all of this earlier. She wouldn’t be getting any help from him. ‘I mean, clearly she doesn’t feel like talking about whatever it is.’
‘Well, she needs to. I know better than anyone what can happen if you don’t get shit off your chest,’ Linc said.
‘Can’t we just be happy that for one year we’re having a nice, peaceful, drama-free Christmas?’
‘Hadley. This is your sister we’re talking about,’ Lavinia said with a disapproving frown.
‘Exactly. You know Harmony. There’s always some kind of crisis going on.’ As far as dramas went, this was in fact a big one and, yes, she wanted nothing more than to finally get it all out in the open, but the timing sucked. This would devastate her parents and that just wasn’t fair when there was still Christmas to get through. ‘Let’s just hold off on the intervention until after Christmas, okay?’
Hadley noted the look exchanged between her brother and mother and plastered on a smile before making a quick exit. She wished she could just say, Trust me, but then they’d know for sure something was up. Maybe she was wrong, maybe it wouldn’t matter when the news broke, it was going to be terrible regardless, but surely ruining Christmas was only adding insult to injury?
‘I’m not sure Harmony will be able to hold Mum off for much longer,’ Hadley said to Ollie later.
‘Maybe that’s a good thing. Get it over and done with.’
‘We just need to get through one more day.’
‘You know, the fact your Mum’s suss about something means she’s probably worried, so it’s not like everything’s fine and dandy just because it’s Christmas.’
‘Yeah, well, it’s in Harmony’s court now. I’m willing to bet she won’t be able to keep up the front for much longer.’
Olivia’s laughter drew their attention. She and Griffin were making cooing noises at baby Mia.
‘Get ready to be an aunty again soon,’ Ollie said, watching his sister’s besotted face.
‘She’s so clucky. And don’t let Griff’s tough guy exterior fool you. I caught him playing with Mia the other day and that kid had him wrapped around her little finger.’
They shared a chuckle as they watched the scene quietly for a few moments.
‘Do you want kids?’ Ollie asked.
Hadley didn’t answer straightaway. That weird empty feeling was still there whenever she thought about a baby of her own.
‘I don’t know,’ she said slowly. She glanced across at him and saw he was watching her thoughtfully. ‘I mean, well … you know about the … when I lost the …’ She couldn’t say it. She didn’t want to say baby. It hurt too much when she thought of it that way. ‘The miscarriage,’ she said instead. She assumed Liv had told him about everything that had happened during that horrible time. It had been the reason Olivia hadn’t wanted to tell Hadley that she’d accidentally discovered Mitch and Harmony together.
‘Yeah. I knew about it. I’m sorry you went through that all by yourself.’
‘Miscarriages happen a lot more often than people realise,’ she said, trying to keep the tone matter-of-fact. ‘I actually remember doing a story about it once.’
‘Yeah, but this wasn’t a story. It happened to you,’ Ollie pointed out, and she knew from the serious look on his face that he wasn’t going to let her shrug it off.
‘In hindsight it was probably a blessing. I’d be connected to Mitch forever if I hadn’t … you know … lost it,’ she said, faltering again.
‘If he and your sister work out, you’ll be connected to him anyway.’
‘Maybe. But sharing a child?’ She shook her head. ‘I can’t even imagine having to be that civil for the rest of my life.’ God, the thought of her ex and her sister having joint custody of her child was a complete nightmare.
Usually when she passed women with babies, there was a moment of wistfulness, of wondering what her baby would have looked like, but it was fleeting. The timing had been all wrong. She couldn’t even imagine herself as a mother, and yet she had mourned the loss of the baby she hadn’t gotten to meet.
Her attention switched back to the man beside her. Ollie. So strong and dependable. Her heart flooded with a fullness that still surprised her. She could see him with one child in his arms and another on his shoulders, looking as comfortable as he was when he was driving a tractor. ‘Yes,’ she said softly, ‘I do want kids.’ With you. The words floated through the air between them and for a moment she wondered if she’d said them out loud.
Ollie’s eyes softened and crinkled in a familiar smile and for one brief moment she forgot about the world a
round them. There was no family crisis, no work commitments, just her and Ollie and the rest of their life together. If only reality were that simple, she thought as Christmas carols belted out of the stereo and Mr and Mrs Claus arrived.
Seventeen
Hadley had always loved Christmas mornings. That moment after you opened your eyes and suddenly remembered what day it was. The burst of excitement that followed and the eager anticipation of running into the lounge room to see if Santa had been.
Today she still awoke with that bubble of excitement inside her, but she was a little less eager to get out of bed this early.
She lay in bed and listened to the stillness of the old house she’d grown up in, and a swell of contentment surrounded her. There really was no place like home. The familiar creaks and the odd groan sounded from the roof and she smiled at the sounds. A new sound came to her and she pushed aside the blanket and climbed from her bed. She made her way down the hall to Linc’s bedroom and eased the door open quietly. Cash was sitting on the edge of the bed gently rocking her daughter in her arms. Mia looked like she had no intention of going back to sleep.
‘I’ll take her so you can go back to sleep for a bit,’ Hadley said, reaching out to take the soft bundle into her arms.
‘You’re an angel,’ Cash said gratefully.
‘That’s me,’ Hadley agreed. ‘Isn’t that right, Miss Mia?’ She closed the door softly behind her and carried the baby out to the lounge room. It didn’t matter how old she got, a Christmas tree lit up with twinkling lights and tinsel always made her happy. She turned on the stereo, making sure the volume was low, and sat cross-legged on the floor with Mia, enjoying the time with this precious little person while the rest of the house slept.
Slowly, one by one, the family emerged from their beds and gradually the room began to fill with the soft murmur of voices.
‘I hope you’re all enjoying the last civilised Christmas morning we’ll have for a while,’ Hadley said, handing Mia over to her parents as she got up to help her mother make coffee before they opened the presents. By the next year Mia would be mobile and it would be an early morning start for everyone. It would also bring back that special magic to Christmas that only small children could bring. She couldn’t wait.
Christmas carols were in full swing by the time everyone was seated back in the lounge room with coffee. Hadley unwrapped her gift from Linc and Cash, feeling a little nervous at the way her brother was watching her so closely. She half expected something to blow up in her face as she opened the box inside, only to discover three smaller boxes. She pulled one out and opened the top, revealing a delicate bone china cup inside. The pretty pink, aqua and brown flowers made a garland around an elegantly swirled message. ‘Aww, guys, this is …’ she paused, her mouth dropping as she read, Oh, for fuck’s sake, scrawled beautifully across the front.
Linc laughed at her reaction, and Cash watched her cautiously. ‘I told him it wasn’t a good idea.’
‘And I told you, as soon as I saw it on the shelf of that gag shop, it was perfect for Hadley,’ Linc shot back. ‘You gotta read the others,’ he said, reaching out to help her before she slapped his hand away. Making sure no one who may be offended was nearby, she carefully put the first mug down and stole a glance at the others. The second one said simply, Fuckity, fuck, fuck, in exquisite writing, making Hadley giggle. The third one had her shoulders shaking with sheer mirth. It was so wrong—Off you fuck, it said in writing that should be on wedding invitations, not inappropriate Christmas gifts.
‘What did you get, darling?’ Lavinia said, coming across to them before Hadley could close the lid of the box. ‘Oh, how pretty,’ her mother said, reaching to inspect one of the cups, before hearing her name called from the kitchen. ‘Honestly, I don’t know what your father does all day out there without me. Once he’s home he can never find a blasted thing on his own.’
Hadley sent her older brother a look and shook her head. ‘You better hope Mum doesn’t see these or she’ll wash your mouth out with soap.’
‘I’ll tell her it was Cash’s idea.’
‘Hey!’ Cash said indignantly.
The morning was full of lazy teasing and Ollie knocked on the screen door just as they were about to start cooking the big barbecue breakfast feast.
‘Merry Christmas,’ Hadley said, her morning brightening, and she wondered when this new butterfly feeling each time she saw him would fade. It showed no signs of diminishing yet.
‘Merry Christmas.’ He lowered his head for a deep kiss.
‘Aww, gross,’ Griffin called out, earning an elbow in the ribs from Olivia and a glare from his mother.
‘Come on,’ Hadley said, rolling her eyes at her brother.
‘Leave the door open,’ her father called behind them as they went down the hallway towards her bedroom.
‘I feel like I’m fifteen again,’ Hadley groaned in mortification.
‘I’m not sure he’s actually joking,’ Ollie said, pointedly making sure the bedroom door was open.
‘Don’t get too excited, this is only where your present is.’
‘That sounds promising,’ he said, sliding his arms around her hips and pulling her close against him.
After quite some time, she gently eased back to look up at him. ‘I seriously didn’t bring you in here just to get you alone.’
‘I’m not complaining.’
‘Here,’ she said, leaning across him to pick up a brightly wrapped parcel.
She watched as he lifted out the T-shirt and held it up and read: Farming: the art of losing money while working 400 hours a month to feed people who think you’re trying to kill them.
‘I thought it quite appropriate in the current climate.’
There was a jeweller’s box beneath the T-shirt. He opened it and stared quietly for a minute before looking over at her.
‘I’m pretty sure even you can’t break that one.’ She nodded down at the lethal-looking black watch in the stainless-steel case. ‘It tells you barometric pressure and has sensors to show your altitude,’ she listed off. ‘And most importantly, a scratch-resistant triple-coated sapphire crystal face.’
‘This must have set you back a fortune,’ he said doubtfully.
‘Nah, I had Linc source it. He knows a guy,’ she shrugged. Despite the generous mates’ rate, it had still cost more than she’d realised a watch could cost.
He strapped it on his wrist and turned his arm to get a better look at it from each angle. ‘It’s awesome,’ he said with a grin, before leaning down to kiss her and pull a slim, rectangular box from his pocket.
Hadley opened it to find a rose gold chain with a small compass pendant hanging from it. She gently picked it up and saw there was a set of numbers engraved on it. ‘Are these coordinates?’
‘That’s the longitude and latitude of Stringybark Creek,’ he said, lowering his voice, ‘so you’ll always be able to find your way home no matter where you go.’
Hadley’s throat instantly closed up tight as she stared down at the delicate necklace. Her gaze blurred as tears welled and spilled over.
‘You don’t like it?’ she heard him ask, sounding devastated.
‘No. No, I love it,’ she said quickly, sniffing and wiping her eyes with her fingertips. ‘It’s beautiful.’ And it was. She was so touched by the sheer thoughtfulness of the gift. She’d been expecting maybe chocolates or a gift voucher to the beauty spa next door, not something this meaningful. He seriously couldn’t have touched her any more deeply if he’d tried. ‘It’s perfect.’
‘Are you sure?’
She lifted her gaze and smiled. ‘I love it. Thank you.’
She saw relief filter through his expression and his shoulders lost some of their tension. ‘I wasn’t sure if it was too soppy. It’s just …’ he started and then paused, shifting uncomfortably. ‘Look, I know you’ve always said we have to see where this goes, and I get that you can’t be here forever … I just thought that your job takes you all over t
he world, and this place can’t compare to that kind of excitement, but maybe, when you wear that, you’ll carry this place with you.’
She swallowed hard. How did he always seem to pick up on what she was thinking and feeling? She’d never mentioned it to anyone, but the last year or so she’d often found herself sitting in some of the most iconic locations around the world and, instead of sitting in awe, she’d found herself thinking of home. She’d never been one to get homesick. She’d always been too busy trying to get her story and making sure she didn’t get herself killed, but lately that had changed. Leaning forwards, she kissed him, trying to put the words she couldn’t find into the kiss.
‘Well? Did he propose?’ Gran asked as they walked back into the family room.
‘Oh my God, Gran,’ Hadley groaned, feeling all eyes turn to them expectantly. ‘No,’ she added incredulously when they continued to wait. Her family seriously had no shame.
‘You want to hurry up,’ the older woman said with a scowl, eyeing all her grandchildren. ‘I won’t be here forever.’
‘No pressure or anything,’ Griff murmured, earning himself an elbow to the ribs from Olivia.
‘Linc and Cash should be the ones you’re hounding, Gran,’ Hadley pointed out. ‘They’ve had a baby and they’re not even married yet.’
‘Oh, nice. Throw me under the bus, why don’t ya?’ Linc scoffed.
‘Come on, Gran. You’re gonna outlive all of us,’ Griffin said, handing his grandmother a glass of eggnog, which seemed to pacify her somewhat. ‘Cash? Eggnog?’ Griff asked, lifting an eyebrow.
‘Funny, Griff,’ Cash muttered, eyeing the drink warily, no doubt recalling her first Christmas experience with Gran’s famous recipe. It was much like Gran herself—deceptively sweet and innocent, but packing an unexpected punch.
‘Finally. Here’s your sister,’ Lavinia said with a note of relief as a car pulled up outside. Hadley suspected her mother had been worried her eldest daughter might not show up today.
As usual at any mention of her sister, Hadley felt a mix of anger, disappointment and sadness wash through her. It was a cocktail of emotions she wished would go away. Would she ever be able to look at her again without this heaviness hanging over her heart? She hoped so, but it wouldn’t be any time soon.