Revenge - A Second Chance, First Time Romance
Page 17
It wasn’t like the store was going to close in the middle of the afternoon. She was being her usual dramatic self.
“Yeah… be right down,” I shouted as I pulled my hair back into a loose ponytail. Hopefully I wouldn’t run into anyone and if I did I had my fingers crossed, that they wouldn’t recognize me.
After one final look in the mirror, I turned on the heel of my converse shoe and left the pink room behind me.
I followed my mom out to the garage as she insisted I drive her car instead of mine. It wasn’t a big deal, in fact, maybe it was better because I’d be able to hide. Whereas if they saw my car maybe someone might recognize me.
As I drove her car to the store, I could feel my mother’s eyes shift back and forth from me to the road and then back again. And I knew exactly what she wanted me to do. I was slouched down trying to keep myself out of view from anyone passing by who might recognize me.
She wouldn’t understand but the last thing I wanted was to run into old friends, or even acquaintances of my parents. I didn’t feel like small talk. I didn’t feel like talking about the weather in the city or my job. And I didn’t feel like being polite.
My grandma just died, and I had to attend her funeral tomorrow. I didn’t even want to be in this stupid town for a second longer than I had to be when everything I drove past reminded me of someone or something.
“Sit up, dear,” she said trying to sound sweet, but it came out in the sour tone I was far too familiar with. “You’re going to get a hunchback.”
“Oh come on,” I mumbled and groaned. But I obeyed as I always had. It was a matter of picking my battles when it came to my mom. I didn’t bother to sweat the small stuff since it could lead to a week long argument or silent treatment.
Listening to her commands was a habit. I was annoyed with myself that at my age I didn’t handle things better than I should have. Sometimes it was just easier to listen and do what she asked rather than argue about it.
“Take a right,” she said pointing out her window.
I rolled my eyes. My whole life, up until I’d left for college, I had lived in this town. I knew the way to the grocery store.
I picked one of the closest spots I could find and slowly pulled in squeezing between two cars. The last thing I wanted to hear was her complaining I parked too far away and she couldn’t make it because of her sore ankles.
Then she’d probably go into a big spiel about how she knows she should work on them, but that she needs to be careful not to over use them. And after that she’d start talking about all the natural remedies she’d read about online. Which ones she has tried and those that she’d try next because nothing was working.
When she looked in her mirror and pattered her hair flat to her head, I knew she wasn’t going to complain about the parking spot. She might find something else to complain about but at least I’d done OK with the distance to the store.
She reached for the door handle and when I didn’t move, she looked at me over her shoulder. “You coming?”
“Must I?”
She clicked her tongue, “It’s up to you.”
I could tell it wasn’t really up to me by her tone, even though she was making it seem like I had a choice. She wanted me along that was clear. If I didn’t go with, she would complain the entire ride home. Which wasn’t that far, but I decided to just go with her and avoid it altogether. I’d just do it. Make her happy. Story of my life.
We walked agonizingly slow through the store. My mom stopped to talk to everyone who whispered their sympathies her way. Each one was more uncomfortable than the last. I’d heard the same stories at least six times before we got back to the car.
My mom and I clearly dealt with grief differently. I wanted to cry each time someone mentioned what a great person my grandma was but my mom was able to nod and wear a brave smile while holding their hand.
I pulled the cart up to the side of the car and loaded the four paper bags into the backseat. My mom took her time getting in the passenger seat rubbing her ankles gingerly.
She hadn’t bought much. I wasn’t even sure any of the things she’d bought were even necessities. It all seemed like things that could have waited until after the funeral.
“What are you going to do with all this stuff anyway? The funeral home is providing a lunch after the service… aren’t they?” I asked closing the car door before she could even respond.
“Providing? Oh honey, we’re providing that by paying the funeral home about four times what that meal will cost them,” she said twisting her wedding ring until it was perfectly centered.
She started going on and on about how she expected people to stop by the house afterward to give their condolences more privately. And if they did, she wanted to be ready for them with some hors d’oeuvres.
She started to talk about some of the great recipes she’d found and I zoned out. I hadn’t heard a single word she’d said, but it wasn’t because she started talking about recipes, it was because I saw him standing there… about ten cars away.
I hadn’t seen him in years and he looked good. Really good. I closed the driver’s side door, and I felt as though my breathing was sporadic. Would she notice the change?
My mom glared at me but thankfully I think I had moved quickly enough that he hadn’t seen me. Even if he had, he probably wouldn’t have recognized me although the fact I was with my mom might be a dead giveaway.
I wondered if they ever ran into each other around town. Would they acknowledge one another or would they just ignore the other and go on their way?
My hair was a lot different now than it had been back then. And my fashion sense, not counting my current outfit had surely changed. I tried to calm myself and steady my breathing.
“What’s gotten into you?” my mom said after staring at me for what felt like an eternity. Apparently, she noticed. I started the car and quickly glanced at him one last time before I put the car in reverse and pulled out of the parking spot.
He was even hotter than I remembered. It looked as though he worked out a lot. He had probably moved on. It wasn’t like he was still waiting for me to come back. Surely he had heard I moved away. Any woman in their right mind would have snatched him up.
I swallowed hard and forced myself not to look back. Last I’d heard about him was that he’d went to prison. I couldn’t remember what the rumors were about what he’d done… something to do with a gun, or threatening someone. I’d never heard the full story, and at the time I probably didn’t want to know.
My parents had tried to do everything they could to keep us apart, but the day he chose the club was the day I quit. I made myself try to forget all about it. It had felt as though he had chosen them over me.
I knew leaving was the best thing. At that point my parents didn’t even have to try that hard to convince me to leave.
None of it mattered any more. It wasn’t meant to be. It felt as though he had been the love of my life right up until he became a prospect.
Maybe we had just grown apart. If I was being totally honest, I had missed him for a long time. He had been a really big part of my life. I hadn’t ever met another person as kind, caring and loyal as he was. The only place I had ever truly felt safe had been in his arms.
“Where are you going?” my mom asked throwing her hand up into the air. I’d missed our turn.
“Sorry,” I said putting on my blinker to take the next turn. “I wasn’t paying attention.”
“Apparently not. Go left here,” she said stretching her arm out in front of me, making sure I saw where she was pointing.
I turned to look at her, “Are you serious right now? We’re like ten feet away from our house.”
“Well just in case you decided to stop paying attention again.” She raised her eyebrow, “I just thought I’d let you know.”
I took in a deep breath and drove us down the street and pulled into the driveway. I refused to let my thoughts drift back to him.
Pike
and I could never be together. He was with the Brother’s Rebellion MC and I lived in the city far, far away from this town.
Thank God.
Chapter 2
Our street was so quiet that when I put the car into park, I was almost positive I’d heard the rumble of a motorcycle not far in the distance. I watched down the road, but I didn’t see anything.
Had he followed us? The last place he’d ever want to go would be to my parents’ house. Even when we had been together, he rarely would have come within two miles of my house. We’d always meet at a nearby park. Always.
It wasn’t that he was afraid of my parents, he knew how they felt about him and I guess he let them have their opinion. There wouldn’t have been anything he could have done to change their mind anyway.
They had it set in their mind the kind of person I would be with. The kind of guy I would someday marry, and it wasn’t Pike.
I stepped out of the car to help my mom carry the groceries into the house. She took a bag and started towards the house. If she’d heard the motorcycle, she ignored it.
“Coming?” she said but didn’t turn around to check to see if I was following her.
As the rumble got louder, I couldn’t take my eyes off the intersection down the road. When I saw something roll up to the stop sign, I blinked. It was a motorcycle, and I was pretty sure it was Pike’s.
I swallowed trying to alleviate the scratchy dryness that was starting to prickle at my throat. The bike drove away, and I scooped up the remaining grocery bags and brought them inside the house.
I set them down on the counter next to the one my mom had placed up there, but she wasn’t in the kitchen. Something took over, and I disappeared back outside and started walking down the block. I was too curious not to go.
My heart was fluttering and I couldn’t make sense of what was driving me. I couldn’t explain why I was going, but for some reason, I just had to see if he would be there.
When we’d been together, we had a spot where we’d meet. I’d sneak out of the house and he’d always be waiting there for me. There was part of me that was wondering if he’d be there now although it seemed foolish to think he would be.
A cool breeze brushed across my face as I walked quickly towards the park. I made my way past the slides and the swing-sets towards the back of the park where there was a little building with a parking lot just before a small wooded area. There were some small hiking trails through the woods, but if he was there, he’d be in the parking lot.
As I rounded the corner of the building, it felt like my stomach was rising up into my throat. My feet almost stopped when I saw him standing there leaning against his bike, lighting a cigarette.
He glanced at me and then his gaze shifted towards the woods. Pike took a long drag from his cigarette and then exhaled a cloud of smoke through his nose. I felt as though I was walking in slow motion.
What was I even doing here? I tried to think back and I couldn’t even remember how I had gotten here.
He looked absolutely gorgeous in his leather jacket covered with the Brother’s Rebellion patches. His hair was longer than I remembered, but it suited him.
I stopped several feet away from him, feeling as though I should turn around and run away. How did I let this happen? He stared at me as he took another drag and let his hand fall down against his thigh.
“How’ve you been?” he said looking directly into my eyes. It felt as though he could look into them and he’d be able to know everything he wanted to know about me. He shifted his weight and tilted his head, squinting at me as though I was too bright to look at. “Been a long time.”
“I’ve been good,” I said with a tight-lipped smile that made the muscles in my face feel sore. “How about you? You look well.”
He chuckled, “Alright I suppose.”
Pike looked me up and down but his expression didn’t change. I couldn’t even guess what he was thinking. I suddenly remember how casually I was dressed. I might as well have been standing here in my pajamas.
“Well, I didn’t think I’d ever see you again,” he said looking away from me.
I looked down at my feet unsure of what to say. Even though my parents lived here, I never thought I’d see him again either. There was a reason besides my controlling parents that I didn’t visit often and I was standing here in that parking lot with that very reason.
It had been hard enough to leave him, seeing him again was bringing back a rush of different emotions. I was having trouble standing still. The feelings were flooding me and I didn’t know how to process any of them. I just wanted to bolt, but at the same time there was part of me that had missed him terribly. That part of me thought it felt really good to see him again.
We had been high school sweethearts. I was the good girl, the smart girl, always on the honor roll and he was the bad boy, almost always in trouble. No one understood it and I didn’t care. I wasn’t sure I understood it either but I had been in love. Only I had even known the real him.
He was the sweetest most caring guy I had ever know. I thought we’d be together forever.
There were times I laid on my bed planning our wedding, but it just wasn’t meant to be. When he joined the club, it hit me hard and my parents helped me see it too. They wanted the best for me, even if they didn’t go about it in the best way. They sent me away.
It took me weeks to get over the whole ordeal. It was stressful and painful. At the time I hated my parents for sending me away and I hated the club for taking Pike away from me. When he went to prison, I finally was able to accept it all for what it was.
My parents never wanted us together, but when he became a prospect that was the last straw as far as they were concerned. They weren’t going to let their daughter get mixed up with the biker.
I didn’t want to be around the guns, the drinking or the reckless parties. It wasn’t my speed. If I was being totally honest most of the members of the MC scared me.
The only ones I knew a little were Stone and Dust. Everyone else was older and obviously we just didn’t run in the same circles. The only reason I’d ever known Stone or Dust was because they were Pike’s friends.
“Saw the papers,” he said as he exhaled another cloud of smoke through his nostrils.
“The papers?”
“Your grandma,” he said looking in my eyes again. I wished he would stop looking at me like that. It felt as though he was doing it on purpose.
“Yeah. She… ahh—”
“Sorry about all that,” he said cutting me off. It seemed as though he could tell I didn’t want to talk about it. Maybe he regretted even mentioning it.
“Yes, thanks.”
“I guess that’s what brought you back here then?”
“Yeah, I’m only in town for a few days,” I said kicking at an invisible pebble.
There was a long pause before he took another drag and dropped his cigarette to the ground. He pressed the toe of his black boot down on top of it to make sure it was out.
He looked up at me briefly and then looked away, “Sucked when you left.”
I hadn’t expected him to bring it up. I didn’t know what to say. What could I say? It did suck. It had been awful for me too.
At the time it felt like I was doing the right thing, or rather that it would be the right thing. But that didn’t mean that it hadn’t been hard. It had been beyond painful.
“I know.” I looked at the ground searching for another invisible pebble.
“Your dad told me you went away.”
“He did? Well, it was for the best,” I said but I sounded more like my mother talking than I sounded like myself. “What else did he say to you?”
“Not much. Just that you were gone and not coming back.”
“Oh,” I said rubbing the skin at my elbows.
Pike took his helmet off of the back of his bike and tucked it under his arm. “Can I see you again while you’re in town? Just to catch up… hear what you’ve been up to.”
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I wanted nothing more than to say yes. It would be perfectly harmless to talk… meet over coffee or something, but I knew it wouldn’t be good for either of us.
Besides, I had to go to a funeral and after that I only had a couple days before I had to get back to my job. My brother would be in town and I had been a long time since I’d seen him. There would just be so much going on.
“Oh, I wish that I could but it’s just that… I’m kind of busy with the whole funeral and family stuff, you know? Maybe next time though. I’d love to hear what you’ve been up to.”
I wanted to kick myself after the words had left my mouth. I already knew what he’d been up to. Prison. And I definitely didn’t want to hear about it. Although, he probably had more going on in his life than having been to prison. Or at least I hoped he did. For all I knew he had gotten married. Maybe he even had children.
It would have actually been nice to spend some time catching up, I just couldn’t do it. I was too afraid of slicing open old wounds. It would just bring back too many memories.
Not to mention it would piss off my parents if they found out I’d met up with him. I didn’t really want to upset my mom after what had just happened with my grandma. She was already in a fragile state.
“No, yeah, I get it. I understand,” he said as he sat down on his bike. He looked at me with his glowing eyes and I wanted to jump on the bike with him… get away from everything. I wanted to feel the wind against my face, blowing my hair back. But he had his club, and I had the funeral.
I don’t even think I wanted to admit it to myself how much I missed him. Being this close to him again made something inside of me feel as though it was vibrating. It definitely didn’t help matters to see how freaking sexy he looked in his leather jacket sitting on his motorcycle.
“It was really good to see you though,” I said lightly biting my lip and sliding my hands into my pockets. It felt awkward. I didn’t know if I should hug him or shake his hand or just walk away.