by Karis Walsh
She went behind the desk and picked up the lodge’s main phone. “Hello? Rosie?”
“Hi, Alana. I wanted to let you know I just dropped Tegan at the hospital—”
Alana’s clipboard slipped out of her hands and clattered onto the desk. “What happened?”
“Not her,” Rosie hastened to reassure her. “Her grandmother had a mild heart attack. Look, I couldn’t go in with her because I have to get to work, but I thought you might want to stop by.”
“I’m on my way.” Alana thanked her quickly and hung up. Chip was standing in the doorway to his office, watching her with a concerned expression.
“I need to go. Tegan’s grandmother is ill. Can you watch the puppies?” Alana struggled to think clearly, when every part of her wanted to run out the door without anything getting in her way. “I’ve got food for Lace in my office in case I’m back late. Nothing else is scheduled for the day, and Marcus is taking care of the horses.”
“Go,” said Chip. “We’ll be fine. Call and let me know what’s going on if you get a chance.”
Alana nodded and grabbed her bag out of her office. She was halfway to the door when she stopped and jogged back to Chip. “Where’s the hospital?”
* * *
Tegan sat in the room with her grandmother, holding her hand and wondering why it hadn’t looked this frail when she had been dishing up ice cream at Saturday’s lunch. Somehow hospital beds and flickering monitors managed to sap the vitality out of a person until they seemed like a shadow of themselves. Her grandmother was talking and alert, but the instruments surrounding her were like huge neon arrows, pointing at illness and fear.
She had been a vet long enough to understand the weirdly slow nature of emergencies. On television shows, the rush to care for a patient had to fit in between commercial breaks. In reality, the exhaustive testing, considering of options, and just plain waiting around seemed to stretch endlessly onward. She’d faced this herself in the clinic, when a fraught owner brought in a pet, expecting her to save it within seconds and getting frustrated when it often took much longer. Once basic survival was ensured, the process of determining cause, treatment, and prognosis slowed to a crawl.
Tegan understood this, yet it still made her want to scream.
She wanted to stay until the specialist arrived, but her grandmother was overly concerned about Tegan and her grandfather. She was expending so much energy trying to convince Tegan she would be okay—consoling and reassuring her like she had when Tegan was a child and her mother had left again—that she wasn’t letting herself get the rest she needed. Tegan finally acknowledged that her presence, while welcome, was putting added strain on Maisie.
“I’m going to check on Gramps,” she said, bending over to give her grandmother a kiss on the cheek.
“All right, dear. I’m sorry you had to cancel appointments just to come down here.”
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll have him write me a check to cover the fees I’m losing,” Tegan joked.
Her grandmother laughed and slapped her hand lightly. “Go on with you,” she said, waving toward the door.
“I’ll be back soon.”
Tegan started down the hall, then changed her mind. Should she have stayed? She walked back into the room, but her grandmother was already asleep, or at least resting with her eyes closed. Tegan headed back to the waiting room again.
She needed to call Dez and make sure everything was set for her to take the afternoon off. And Rosie, to let her know what was going on and to thank her for the ride. The one person she really wanted to call was Alana, but she had been coming up with excuses not to. Alana was in her meeting. She was probably riding. She was busy at the ranch…
The truth was, Tegan wasn’t sure how Alana would react to the call. She’d be compassionate, of course. Tegan didn’t doubt that. But they were something new together, something undefined. How would this kind of situation be handled in their relationship? As much as she had defended Alana to Rosie, insisting she wasn’t like Fay and the other women in her past, a tiny part of her was afraid she’d call Alana and hear something that, although polite and sympathetic, would mean Tegan had to face this alone. Oh, I’m sorry to hear about your grandmother. Give me a call later, if you get out of there early enough to come over.
Tegan stopped by the nurses’ station to check on the next doctor’s arrival time—still unknown—and to find out if any test results were back—not yet. She sighed and pushed through the swinging doors into the waiting room.
Her grandfather was sitting near the windows reading a magazine, and Alana was next to him, looking over his shoulder and pointing at something on the page. She looked up when Tegan came in and was across the room and holding her tightly before Tegan took another step.
“You’re here,” Tegan said, pulling back enough to give Alana a kiss.
“Where else would I be? Waiting for you at home and hoping you would bring me some Jell-O?”
Tegan laughed. Alana had basically described the scenario she had been fearing, but in a dismissive tone.
“Well, something along those…wait. How’d you find out I was here? Dez or Rosie?”
“Both,” Alana said. “Rosie caught me at the ranch, and I got Dez’s call on my cell while I was driving. Were you going to call?”
Tegan put her hand on Alana’s cheek, hating to see even a trace of hurt and confusion in her expression. “I was. I wanted to right away, before I even got here, but I was worried…”
“That I really would choose to sit at home and not come down here,” Alana finished for her when she paused.
“Yes.”
Alana shook her head with a sad expression and went back to Howard, sitting down next to him.
“How is she?” he asked. His concern and fear seemed to be carved into the lines of his face, but he had been doing his best to act optimistic and strong.
“She’s sleeping,” Tegan said. She filled Alana in on what had been happening, and then noticed the magazine her grandfather was holding. “Were the two of you reading an automotive magazine?”
He looked down at his hands, as if needing to confirm what he was holding. “We were looking at this article on SUV tires.”
“Neither of you has an SUV.”
Alana shrugged. “We didn’t have many choices. It was this, or my notes about the grand opening at the ranch.”
Howard stood up. “I’m going to the gift shop to buy a book of crossword puzzles. I’ll be right back.”
“If we hear anything new, we’ll come get you.”
Tegan leaned back in her chair, feeling more at peace with Alana’s thigh against hers, and their fingers entwined, than she had all day. Still scared and worried, but less shaky.
“How was your meeting?” she asked, stretching out her legs and crossing them at the ankles.
“I think it went well. There were lots of questions, and everyone seems excited about the opening. I don’t know why, since Chip is paying them to do nothing until then. With personal checks.”
Tegan winced. “Not smart. Maybe you should suggest he hire an accountant. Oh, I guess you already have,” she added when Alana gave her a no shit look.
“I kept getting distracted during my meeting,” Alana said, nudging Tegan with her shoulder. “Scenes from last night popped into my head at unexpected moments.”
Tegan smiled at her. “Same here. I was either dozing off from exhaustion or blushing all morning. Rosie had barely been there three minutes before she was making snide comments about it.”
Alana met her gaze, and some detailed images from the night before flashed into Tegan’s mind, apparently conjured up by the conversation. She looked at Alana’s mouth, watching the sexy way she was nibbling her lip, wanting to kiss her again and do some biting of her own.
They turned away from each other at the same moment. Now was certainly not the time or place for making out, but somehow the connection she had just felt with Alana gave her a sense of strength.
“Did Rosie bring another feral cat?” Alana asked, thankfully jumping to a more appropriate topic.
“She did. This one obviously belonged to someone before he was abandoned, or maybe ran away. He’ll be adoptable, but you know how it is with older animals.”
“Like Lace?”
Tegan nodded. “Although she’s only three or four. This cat is closer to seven, but he could have a long and wonderful life ahead if the right person adopts him.” She raised their linked hands and kissed Alana’s knuckles. “Speaking of my day, I had an interesting conversation with Amy when she called to ask about setting up a meet-and-greet with King and Prince.”
“Interesting in what way?” Alana asked with what Tegan thought might be a carefully casual tone.
“Well, she talked about coming to your house and seeing the puppies. Then she mentioned how difficult it had been to choose just one.”
“Mm-hmm,” Alana said. “I happened to be there at the time. We need to talk about your definition of interesting.”
“How about this. She said she had a hard time deciding which of the five puppies she wanted most.”
“Five? One of them must have been hiding under a table or something.”
“Could be, could be.” Tegan stretched the words out, amused by the way Alana was beginning to shift around in her seat.
“Do you want coffee? I could go get us something from the cafeteria.”
Tegan continued as if she hadn’t heard her. “I was thinking, if you were trying to keep them from choosing a puppy because Chip or another of my clients wanted it, you’d simply tell them which ones weren’t available. But if you happened to have your own preference, but didn’t want to admit it—”
“Crossword puzzle time,” Alana said. She moved one seat over and beckoned for Howard to sit between them.
Alana dug a pencil out of her bag and gave it to Howard. Tegan headed back to check on her grandmother, giving her a wink on the way out of the waiting room. Alana wasn’t ready to admit she’d stashed Chantilly in her room the day Amy and her family had come over. And when Tegan’s other clients visited, as well. She would never adopt a dog and then leave it behind when she left, and she couldn’t take one to live a vagabond’s life with her.
When she found the exact right owner for Chantilly, she’d bring her out with a flourish. Until then, she would stay in the bedroom.
Luckily, Tegan didn’t bring up the subject again. Alana stayed in the waiting room, doing her best to occupy the fidgety mind of whichever one wasn’t back in the hospital room. She did crossword puzzles with Howard and told Tegan stories from her previous job to make her laugh. When she found out neither one had eaten all day, except for Tegan’s cookie and Howard’s questionable breakfast of apple pie, she forced them to go to the cafeteria while she stood guard near the nurses’ station.
It made her sad that Tegan hadn’t called her immediately. Not because she was angry about Tegan not trusting her to come to the hospital—they hadn’t been dating, or whatever they were doing, long enough to anticipate how the other would react in unexpected situations. She felt sad because she hated the thought of Tegan being with women in the past who wouldn’t have been there for her. She deserved so much more.
Of course, right now she hated the thought of Tegan being with any other woman, no matter how kind or unselfish. She couldn’t imagine dating anyone but Tegan, herself. Maybe the feeling of belonging to each other would fade once Alana was out of town and busy with the kind of work she really wanted to do.
Ugh. She wasn’t going to think about moving or moving on right now. She took out her phone and called the hotel attached to the hospital, making a reservation for Howard since he didn’t even want to be as far away as Alana’s house or Tegan’s clinic. As she was ending the call, he and Tegan came out to the waiting room once more.
“She’s sleeping now, and they suggested we go home and do the same,” Tegan said, reaching for Alana’s hand and pulling her to her feet. “The news is about as good as we could have hoped for, given what happened. A minor heart attack, but no signs of serious damage. She might be released as early as tomorrow, depending on more tests.”
“I’m so glad,” Alana said, kissing Tegan on the cheek and hugging Howard. They walked him down the corridors to the hotel, and then headed out to Alana’s truck.
After a brief stop at the ranch to get the puppies, they finally got back to Alana’s house. Chip had wanted to keep the litter overnight—claiming it was because he wanted to help her, not because he just wanted them there. She told him they would be more comfortable sleeping in their own room, although she had to admit to herself that she selfishly wanted to hang on to every moment she and Lace and the puppies had together. He’d be keeping one, whether he knew it or not, but her time with them was limited.
Her time with Tegan was limited, too. She had been relieved when Tegan had wanted to stay with her tonight. Neither was expecting a repeat of the night before right now. This would be a night for holding and sleeping, and Alana realized she didn’t care what they did together, as long as they weren’t wasting time by being apart.
She locked the front door behind them and turned to Tegan, her normally tanned skin turned ashy and dark smudges under her hazel eyes.
“Lie down,” she said, pointing at the living room floor. Tegan looked about to protest, so Alana took hold of her shoulders and aimed her toward the couch. “Lie on the floor.”
Tegan did as she said, and Alana set the puppy crate on the floor. “This is for your own good,” she said as she opened the crate’s door and six puppies tumbled out in their eagerness to get to Tegan. Prince went for her exposed ankles, but the rest converged on her face.
As tired and stressed as Tegan was, she couldn’t keep her composure while being licked by a bunch of puppies. Alana watched for a moment, relieved to hear Tegan’s shrieks of laughter, but she couldn’t remain aloof for long. She got down on the living room floor and joined her strange pack.
Alana lay down, and Tegan gathered her close until Alana’s head was resting on her chest and their bodies were pressed against each other. One of the puppies climbed onto Tegan and batted at Alana’s nose with a tiny, furry paw. Alana smiled, nuzzling closer to Tegan and reaching out to pet the small pup. She had originally intended to help Tegan relax with the puppy pile, but now she found herself unspooling softly into Tegan’s embrace and into the soft pleasure of having puppies struggling to climb over her hip and shoulders. Strange how everything she claimed she didn’t want forever—this house, this town, these animals, a meaningful relationship with Tegan—were the exact things that seemed to make her feel happier and more at ease than she had ever felt. Was it merely the novelty of all this that attracted her? Lying close to her lover, playing with pets, and working at a fun job that wasn’t merely a rung on a stress-filled career ladder were unfamiliar and unusual activities for her. Did her current joy in them mean she wanted them for a lifetime, or was she merely experiencing the effects of a long overdue vacation away from her real life?
With the abruptness of babyhood, the puppies shifted from frenzied to sleepy in a heartbeat. Alana gently picked up the pup that had been bopping her nose and set him on the floor alongside Tegan, where some of his brothers and sisters were curling up together. He yawned widely, unfurling his pink tongue and dropping onto his stomach next to his siblings.
Alana shifted until she was on top of Tegan, nestled between her legs and with her elbows on the floor on either side of Tegan’s face, bearing her weight so her hands were free to sift through Tegan’s hair and to caress her cheeks and lips. She wasn’t sure how to voice the questions she had been asking herself since she was worried that she might sound as if she thought their relationship was just a holiday fling. Whatever it was, and however long it might last, it was more meaningful than anything Alana had experienced before. Did meaningful have to mean forever? Or could it be wonderful and temporary?
Alana’s head ached from
the questions, so she decided to ignore them and concentrate on Tegan instead. On the way her mouth parted in a sigh when Alana’s finger traced the curve of her earlobe, and on the heat Alana felt against her thigh when she pressed it against Tegan’s crotch. On the way their lips fit together with the ease of familiarity and the thrill of desire when she kissed her. Alana was confused by the way Tegan managed to embody a blend of the comforts of home with the excitement of a passionate tryst—two concepts that Alana thought should be in conflict but were instead perfectly meshed. She turned away from that, too, and distracted herself thoroughly by falling deeper into Tegan’s kiss.
Chapter Sixteen
Two days later, Alana was ready to canvass her neighborhood again. She still had two puppies who needed homes, since Tegan’s three clients and Chip, with her as proxy, had spoken for the other four. The smartest choice might have been to go to houses she hadn’t been to before, but she had her own plans for the day.
Tegan was back at work after missing yesterday to take her grandmother home, and Alana had stopped by there in a roundabout route to this house. If Tegan hadn’t been with a client, Alana would have been tempted to linger, but she was trying to cram all her missed appointments into the next few days. Alana missed her already.
She got out of the truck, pulled the pet carrier off the passenger seat, and picked up a plastic sack from the local pet store. She balanced the load she was carrying and went onto the porch to ring the bell. Gladys opened the door with its chain attached.
“Good morning. It’s Alana, from the old Harrison place.”
“Hello, Alana,” Gladys said. She shut the door to undo the chain and opened it wider. She pointed at the crate. “Do you have your puppies in there? I’m afraid I still can’t take one.”