The Omega's Dearest Baby

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by Louise Bourgeois




  The Omega's Dearest Baby

  An MPREG Romance

  By Louise Bourgeois

  CHAPTER ONE

  The door was ajar, so Romella knocked and pushed the door open. "Noah?" she said.

  Noah didn't lift the wet flannel from his forehead when she sat down in the empty make up chair beside him. "Yes?"

  "I’ve got a big interview tomorrow. Would you go through it with me, if that's alright?"

  It didn't seem something that Noah could actually safely refuse to do, not without making extra work for himself for the next morning, so he nodded.

  Romella placed her laptop on the dresser in front of Noah, and he didn't move.

  "What is it?" she asked, concern in her voice.

  He shrugged.

  There was a pause. "I've never seen you flat like this before."

  Noah peeled the wet flannel off his face and opened his eyes slowly. "I just feel really tired," he said. "That's all. I just want to go home."

  Noah put the flannel back on his face, and Romella stared at herself in the mirror.

  "Where do I live, Romella?" Noah suddenly asked from under the cloth.

  "In a suitcase, the same as me," she answered.

  ***

  Kaycie was all giggles and smiles as she pulled Noah into his hotel room. "Come on," she said, pushing the door shut behind them and beginning to unbutton his shirt. "Come on, love, it's been ages. I've really been looking forward to this."

  Noah kissed her, and her lips were full and soft and tasted faintly of lipstick, and she kissed him back eagerly.

  Then they were on the bed, and she was straddling his hips, pulling her dress up so she could spread her thighs wide enough, showing smooth golden skin, and delicate lace underwear.

  He slid his hands over the skin, knowing at an intellectual level that this was what he liked about her; her smoothness, the way she smelt of soap, and CK Be, the way she always tasted so alive. However much his intellect was appreciating this though, the rest of his body wasn't following, and he ground his hips up deliberately, hoping the friction against her body would wake his libido up.

  Nothing happened, not even when she tried to coax him to hardness with her mouth, and he stroked her hair and said, "Sorry, love, it's not going to be tonight."

  She crawled up the bed, an image that usually drove him crazy, then settled in his open arms, her head against his chest.

  "You're just really tired, that's all," she reassured.

  He kissed her golden hair: golden hair to match her golden skin, and said, "Just because I'm tired, doesn't mean that I can't make you feel good," and he eased her off his chest and onto her back, and knelt up beside her hips.

  She made a contented sigh and settled back on the pillows, and said, "You wait, you'll wake up rock hard tomorrow morning."

  He leant forward and ran a tongue over her flat belly and around her belly button, then pressed a kiss against her hip bone. "God, yeah," he agreed.

  ***

  He didn't wake up hard. When the alarm went off at 5am, he woke up hungry and tired, deeply tired. When Kaycie left the next day, she kissed him on the cheek and said, "You wait, you'll be fine when you're back in LA in a couple of weeks. You can sleep in every day, and rest as much as you want, and we can catch up then."

  He kissed her back and nodded, and wondered why it felt like he would never be interested in sex again.

  ***

  Back in his hotel room that night, he tried, really tried to get hard again.

  It hadn't been like this a few weeks ago, when Vincent had rung him unexpectedly, saying, "Where the fuck are you?"

  This was how it had been before. After weeks or months, one of them would call the other one, and if they were in the same place, they'd meet somewhere, some anonymous hotel room perhaps, and they'd fuck. That was how it always had been between them.

  The first time, Noah had walked out of the tiny bathroom, just a towel around his waist, and Vincent had grabbed his arms and pushed him against a wall covered in photos. "Will you let me?" was all he'd said.

  "Fuck, yeah," had been Noah's reply.

  The sex wasn't gentle, it never had been. It was wild and uncontrolled and sweaty and unspoken. They'd never confused things with words, with declarations of affection. This was just about what it felt like to be together.

  That was how the most recent time had been when they were in Spain for a week. Noah had fucked Vincent, made him come, and come again. And they had wound up on the floor of Noah's hotel room, making guttural groans together, until their knees were red with carpet burns, and their voices were hoarse.

  Fuck.

  Then the condom had broken, and Vincent had pulled out in a hurry, shreds of yellow latex wrapped around the base of his cock, the last pulse of his orgasm still welling up, viscous and opaque, from the eye of his cock.

  "Jesusfuckingchrist," Vincent had said. "Fucking condom broke." Then he had fallen forward onto the vile maroon carpet beside Noah, who rolled onto his side to stare down with horror at Vincent's groin.

  "Fuckinghell."

  There had been several long seconds of silence, and Noah had said, "I know I'm HIV negative."

  Vincent had pulled roughly at the remaining latex and said, "Me too. No problems there then."

  Was this the problem? Was he freaked out about having sex with Kaycie because the condom had broken with Vincent? It shouldn't be, he and Kaycie always had safe sex anyway.

  Noah gave up stroking himself and let go of his limp cock before rolling onto his stomach. He wasn't, after all this time, actually feeling guilty about fucking Vincent as well… well, was he?

  There was no guilt there. Not that Kaycie had any idea, and he had no intention of telling her. What he had with Vincent was physical, it was about passion and spontaneity, not love and commitment. They certainly never planned to meet again, never went further than one of them rolling tiredly out of bed the next morning, body aching pleasantly, and kissing the other one on the lips before staggering to the shower.

  One day they'd stop, maybe they already had.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Kaycie propped herself up on one elbow and said, "Honey, you've been home a week. I think you should see a doctor."

  "No way," Noah said, rolling onto his side, his back to her.

  Her hand shook his shoulder gently. "Yes. We haven't really had sex since before you went to Spain. That's a long time. You need to go and talk to someone about this. How would you feel if it was me not able to have sex with you?"

  Screwing his eyes tightly shut, Noah said, "Alright. I'll go talk to my own doctor. Now will you let me go to sleep?"

  ***

  Dr. Alden nodded sympathetically at Noah, and Kaycie squeezed the hand of his that she was holding.

  "Impotence is a very common problem, very common indeed. Do you still have erections during the night or first thing in the morning?"

  Noah shook his head. "I can't remember the last time I was hard."

  That was a lie, he knew he had been hard when Vincent had been kneeling between his legs, blowing him one last time before he left to catch his flight.

  Dr. Alden frowned. "Have you had any other changes? Or health problems?"

  Frowning a little too, Noah said, "My back hurts more now. It's been really troubling me for the past few weeks."

  The doctor nodded, radiating professional understanding. "Increased pain might be the problem then. People underestimate how debilitating chronic pain can be. I'll check you out, make sure I can't find any obvious problems, then I think we'll review your pain management. Let's treat that first." He smiled reassuringly and said, "Though I must warn you that impotence in young men is almost always a psychologi
cal problem."

  Noah tried not to wince, and Kaycie leant across and murmured supportively, "Why didn't you tell me your back was hurting you? I would have been more understanding then."

  Dr. Alden ran quickly through the usual routine. Blood pressure cuff; stethoscope; tapping finger; breathe in and out; lie down.

  Noah leant back on the couch and pushed his jeans down to his hips and pulled his T-shirt up to his ribs. The stethoscope was cool on his belly, and Kaycie stood beside his shoulder, her hand on his arm, and he remembered that she had gone to medical school once.

  Dr. Alden’s face changed, becoming grave as he felt across Noah's abdomen, and Noah winced suddenly. When the doctor looked up at him, Noah realized that he was seeing genuine concern in his eyes. "Is that painful?" he asked, pushing gently.

  Noah said, "Yes," and tried not to flinch away.

  "Have you had any bowel changes?" Dr. Alden asked, and Noah heard Kaycie's breath hiss in suddenly. "Any blood in your stools? A change of color? Black stools?"

  Noah shook his head. "Nothing, nothing at all." When he looked up at Kaycie, she was blinking unshed tears away.

  Dr. Alden nodded slowly. "You can get dressed now, then come and sit down again."

  When Noah sat opposite the doctor's desk again, he could feel the tension in Kaycie, even though she had not spoken a word.

  Dr. Alden scribbled quickly on a pad in front of him, then looked up. "I want you to have that mass in your abdomen ultra sounded immediately, then come straight back here to me with the results. I'm sorry, Noah, there are no good options. That mass is going to be a tumor."

  Noah said, "Oh God, a tumor," and beside him, Kaycie sniffed.

  "Don't eat or drink anything, please. I suspect you'll be having surgery later today. Come back here, and I'll let my receptionist know you're to see me immediately, and I'll refer you to an oncologist then. I think there is a very good reason why you've been impotent."

  When Noah stood up, Kaycie holding tightly onto his arm, the room spun a little, and Dr. Alden said, "I'm sorry for this."

  ***

  In the car, Kaycie drove for him, and Noah resisted the urge to feel down his belly to find the sore place inside himself.

  CHAPTER THREE

  The young woman at the radiographers pulled the squeeze bottle of gel out of the pocket of her white overalls and said, "It's warmer if it's in my pocket," as she squeezed the gel onto Noah's belly.

  He gasped. Despite the woman's words, the goop was cold.

  She spun the monitor round so neither Kaycie nor Noah could see it, and began to move the probe backwards and forwards across Noah's belly. Noah could feel the lump inside himself now, as she pressed against it, and he began to wonder how he could have missed something so obvious.

  Kaycie's grip on his hand was firm, and he looked up at her worried face. The woman worked in silence for several minutes, then said, "Excuse me," and went and picked up the phone.

  She kept her back to them, and Kaycie leant down and whispered, "She just said the word 'teratoma.'"

  "What's that?" Noah whispered back.

  "It's a type of tumor that has skin and bone and hair in it."

  "God."

  The door to the cubicle opened, and an older woman, also in white overalls, came in. "I'm Dr. Addison Francke. Lisa has asked me to come and have a look at Noah's scan." She sat down on the stool Lisa had been using and began to move the probe backwards and forwards.

  Kaycie said, "Do you think it's a teratoma?"

  Dr. Francke turned her head a little to glare briefly at Lisa and said, "This does look like a teratoma. The radiographer's assistants aren't supposed to tell you what they can see. Only physicians like me can. I'm not going to show it to you as I don't usually show people the screen, though the exceptions to that are pregnancies, where we show the mums their babies."

  She hummed as she worked, rocking the probe across the same area over and over again, until she said, "Fuck."

  Kaycie said, "Oh God, what?" and Noah flinched as she pressed harder with the probe.

  Dr. Francke reached up and spun the monitor around so Kaycie and Noah could see it and said, "I've never seen a teratoma with a heartbeat before. That's a fetus."

  Using the mouse beside her, she held the cursor over a flickering point and said, "That is most definitely a heartbeat." She moved the cursor around, and clicked the keyboard, and said, "That is a ten week old fetus."

  Noah said, "How? How could that…?" and panic and disbelief welled up inside him.

  Dr. Francke said, "The why and the how are not my areas of expertise at all, but I'm sure your physician will know who to refer you to. I'll print out all of the scans I have here." She pressed some keys on her keyboard, then said, "Considering you were sent here for a preliminary assessment of a cancerous tumor, I think walking out holding ultrasounds of a fetus is something to be happy about."

  ***

  Kaycie was silent, even when they were standing in the lift, waiting for the doors to close.

  Noah said, "Katie? Are you going to say something?"

  She shook her head, and the lift whirred. "I have no idea what to say. I can't imagine how that has happened, just can't imagine." She slid her hand into Noah's elbow. "I think I'm going to be happy it wasn't cancer, but I'm too shocked at the moment."

  Noah leant back against the wall of the lift and closed his eyes briefly. He couldn't imagine it either, though if the doctor was right, and there was a fetus, it must have got there somehow.

  Shreds of yellow latex.

  Noah had a blinding moment of realization, and the lift doors opened at the basement car park.

  Kaycie pushed the button on the remote lock for his car, and the lights flashed once, and Noah said, "Go ahead, will you? I need to be alone for a tick."

  She stood on her toes and kissed his cheek. "Of course, love. Take a moment if you need it."

  Noah watched her climb into the car, and stepped behind a parked van and pulled his phone out of his pocket.

  Vincent's voice was distracted when he answered, and the phone had rung for a long time, so Noah figured he was painting or writing. No creative artistic crap was going to work with Noah right at that moment, and he said, "Vincent, you are a total shit. Do you have any idea what sort of a fucked up mess you've gotten me into?"

  Vincent's voice said, "Noah? Are you back in the States?" and there was a seductive edge to the words.

  "Fuck you; you are never fucking touching me again!" Noah's voice was rising, shock giving way to anger at the past few hours.

  "Noah? What's wrong?"

  "Fuck off!" Noah shouted into his phone, clicking it off and resisting the urge to throw it at the concrete paving.

  Kaycie put a hand soothingly onto his arm. "Who are you shouting at, Noah?"

  Anger burned white hot in Noah, anger at Kaycie because this was happening to the wrong person in the wrong way, anger at Vincent for doing it to him, anger at his own body for being so profoundly wrong, and Noah shook her hand off him and spat at Kaycie, "The man who did this to me, who do you think?"

  Kaycie wasn't stupid; he gave her credit for that. Less than half a second was all it took for concern and worry to give way to comprehension. "You let some guy fuck you?" she said disgustedly. "You cheated on me?"

  Then she was gone, and before she had spun the wheels of his car reversing out of the bay, Noah's phone rang in his hand.

  He pushed a button and lifted the phone to his ear, and Vincent's voice said, "Noah, what is going on?"

  Noah let himself slide tiredly down the side of the van until he was sitting on the concrete. "Vincent, Kaycie just stole my car. Can you come and get me?"

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Noah climbed into the passenger seat and slammed the door of Vincent’s car. “You’re a fucking asshole, Vincent. Worst fucking thing I ever did was let you fuck me.”

  “Hi, Noah. Having a bad day?” Vincent asked neutrally. “Where we going to? Why’d Kaycie lea
ve you here? You must have really pissed her off.”

  Noah glowered at Vincent and said, “Just shut the fuck up and drive, you bastard.”

  He descended into silence then, and stared out the window, speaking only to tell Vincent where to drive. The anger seemed to melt out of him, now Vincent had turned up. How could he blame Vincent? It had been both of them, going for it on the hotel room floor. He remembered the moment so vividly, the pattern of the carpet, the TV blaring the news in Spanish to cover up the noises they were making…

  He slid his hand under his seat belt and pressed his fingers against the lump inside him. There it was, quite firm and a little tender.

  He tried to make himself tell Vincent, but no words would come out of his mouth.

  ***

  The geneticist Noah’s physician sent him to proved to be tall and elegant, tucking long black curls behind her ear with one hand and waving the other, holding a sandwich, at the sofa in the corner.

  “Come in, sit down.” She sank into a chair opposite them and said, “I’m Rhian. Please excuse me eating. Whoever said time is money was wrong. Time is calories, and this is my lunch break.” She took a bite of the sandwich and said, “Chris Alden didn’t tell me anything on the phone, just that you needed to be seen urgently. What’s going on?”

  Noah said, “I’m Noah, and this is my…” and his voice faltered, “friend, Vincent. I just found out I have a fetus inside me.”

  There was a choking noise beside him from Vincent.

  Noah found there was a certain satisfaction in dropping Vincent into it without warning. He held out the envelope of ultrasounds to Rhian, who wiped her hands on her trousers and held the scans up to the light.

  “There’re two alternatives,” she said, putting the scans on the table beside her. “The first is that you’ve been to Dr. Lee’s clinic, but in that case, you would be still with him in Thailand for management of the pregnancy, so I’m assuming that’s wrong. The second is that this is a spontaneous event, and you want to know what the hell has happened.”

 

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